Raising girls

[Sr_Sally]

From a NYT editorial:

A family counselor I heard speak last Spring said she believes that young girls today who get caught up in skinniness, fashion, popularity, pop culture and boys are, essentially, “underemployed.” Their brains, she said, need to be engaged by things larger than themselves: things like hobbies, sports, art, music or community service. If they’re not, there’s a vacuum, and all kinds of wretched stuff comes to fill their minds instead.

I think this is spot-on. And true for boys in trouble too. So what do you do to keep your girls “fully employed”?

 

[HouseArrest]

Thanks for posting that. It makes sense, but I get a feeling that “overscheduling” is at odds with that statement. I suppose reading, playing outdoors (we still call it playing, kids are young) and having friends over do not need scheduled.

 

[TIME]

My wife and I have all of girls, a house full, from elementary school to college, no boys. This would also go for boys, but I can tell you the SINGLE most productive thing we did from the beginning, when they came home from the hospital was raise them in a TV Free home. Our girls are all Honors and AP students involved in sports and Religious after school actives. As soon as they came home from the hospital we knew even back in the 90’s how poisonous TV was. Today it is simply 98% Satan’s megaphone.

They are all very much girly-girls, but they know the difference between being tacky and being a proper young ladies.

 

[Potato1]

2 things I think are funny here. 1… We sure like to turn things into gender crisis dont we. Why is this gender specific. As previous posters have said this goes for boys, all children, heck enen adults it is a “universal truth”
2… Why do we always pat ourselves on the back for reinventing the wheel. My grandma used to always say 'Idle hands are the devils workshop" the NYT is hilarious for taking old “family common sense type wisdom” and putting thier own intelectually smug spin on it and turning it into a gender issue. All the while ususally mocking the midwestern types with family values. Be involved and get your kids involved…I don’t need som psuedo coffeshop “journalist” to tell me this.

 

[Sr_Sally]

Potato1, I am laughing reading your post! I agree completely. I just liked her “under-employed” imagery. And there is a line between ‘busy and keeping out of trouble’ and ‘busy and working on burn-out’ which I see lots of in this Type-A, urbam area.

 

[puzzleannie]

the girls I know have the opposite problem, over scheduling, multiple extra-curricular activities, sometimes jobs, so they don’t have time to relax and recreate, to eat properly, to sleep, let alone for Mass, CCD, youth group, Confirmation meetings etc. It think the underlying problem with both types of teen is setting priorities, being guided to discern what is important, what is beneficial, what aids their growth, how to plan for their futures, and to discern vocation so that planning has depth and meaning.

 

[Sr_Sally]

the girls I know have the opposite problem, over scheduling, multiple extra-curricular activities, sometimes jobs, so they don’t have time to relax and recreate, to eat properly, to sleep, let alone for Mass, CCD, youth group, Confirmation meetings etc. It think the underlying problem with both types of teen is setting priorities, being guided to discern what is important, what is beneficial, what aids their growth, how to plan for their futures, and to discern vocation so that planning has depth and meaning.

Agreeing with you completely! I’ve always liked MaryKay Ash’s priorities: God, Family, Work. So for my dc, Mass and CCD are at the top of the list. Before schoolwork even. And activities outside of school (lessons, sports, etc.) come after school and also after family time. Which means that they have missed activites or not been allowed to join something that would consistently enfringe on Church or Family time.