Rant Alert - Mass Etiquette

[BlestOne]

You know I thank God I am in a small parish in the midwest!!! Yes we do see some of what you are describing but not nearly as much!!! The one thing that gets to me is seeing people that don’t normally attend our parish sit in the seats designated for the elderly and disabled. I look at them and think…did you really think that the front pew was a good place to sit when it is right next to the handicapped entrance? And then they never understand that the priest serves communion to the first two rows at their pew, yet they always try to go past the handicapped and go up to the altar or they don’t kneel or stand they just stay seated like those in wheelchairs…

 

[VeronicasJude]

Anymore, it seems that I have to keep my eyes closed and strain my ears in order to truly focus on the Mass. Im sure that our priests used to think that I was sleeping. No, its to tune out all of the screaming babies, the cell phones, the kids putting rosaries on thier heads and flinging thier heads around like saucers.

There ws a woman in front of me today who had on a top that went right below her braline and a skirt that started at her naval. her child ws turned around and making the people directly in front of me very uncomfortable. Another kid came back from communion with a tshirt that had a huge Gun on the front of it and then another that said “pimp in training”

I literally have to keep my head bowed and eyes closed. God forbide I Bow before communion and the guy behind runs into me.

 

[Lorrie]

Two Sundays ago I decided to attend the Church I was confirmed in for Mass. After the Priest had processed out I knelt down to say my prayers before leaving. About 10 seconds after kneeling down I heard someone clear their throat. I looked up and he said, “Excuse me”, I replied by saying, “No, excuse me, there is another way out of the pew (behind him where no one else was at), I suggest you have respect for those who are praying and use the alternate exit from this pew.” He stood there in shock for a moment and then finally exited out the other direction. I was livid beyond words!!! So rude and thoughtless.

As a side note, after he left I happened to glance around and saw I was the only one praying. That in itself is sad.

For futher reading on this subject you can view my thread on this:

forums.catholic-questions.org/showthread.php?t=63954

 

[Frankie]

Oh boy, I do so hope some priests and bishops read this forum!

A couple of years asfter getting a change of parish priest, I found myself almost in a rage after Sunday Mass, week after week. The Mass had degenerated into a platform for socio-political diatribe and there was talking before Mass and - much worse - immediately afterwards. I felt like a freak kneeling down trying to make my thanksgiving after Communion.
By chance I found an indult old latin mass not too far away. I almost wept with relief at the incredible reverence people display in church - and many people come early and stay for a good time after Mass in the church to pray.
Some of these folks have some very funny ideas about the Mass, the Pope and the Council - to which I do not subscribe - and I am sad not to be able to go to the normative Mass of the Church in my parish, but I could not longer tolerate the lack of respect, the dress-for-the-beach and the Mass turned into a forum to discuss the latest politically correct issue.
Never were the issues of abortion, contraception or euthanasia mentioned from the pulpit, of course.
Whew! That feels better!

 

[iamrefreshed]

Yes, things are much different than when I was a child. I grew up in NYC and church was always a place of silence and prayer.

Now I live in central Florida and Sunday Mass is more of a social event.

However, after being away from the church for much of my adult life, anything is better than what I was missing!

I go to a couple of 7AM Masses during the week for my quiet prayer. The daily communicants tend to be much older and more respectful.

 

[moira]

Petertherock:

I really don’t think V2 or the NO Mass has anything to do with anything. It’s the society we live in today. It doesn’t matter if the Mass is said in Latin or English the people would still be talking and having their cell phones going off no matter what. It’s a problem with the religious education and the society we live in.

Part of what you say is true; there is a problem with religious education and the society in which we live. But it does seem to matter if the Mass is in the venacular or a Tridentine Mass. At a Tridentine Mass I don’t see people dressing inappropriately. I also don’t hear cell phones ringing and at the Tridentine Mass I attend, it is so quiet you could hear a pin drop. The reverence and quiet is much more conducive to prayer.

After attending a Tridentine Mass for a year now, I have a very hard time attending an NO Mass. I know that an NO Mass is valid and is still the Holy Sacrifice but the atmosphere is very different.

 

[iamrefreshed]

JC Nixon:

It is truly a sad state of affairs. Sometimes I wonder if some people even know why they have come to church. It seems many come ‘because it is Sunday, we are supposed to go to church on Sunday’. Then they come dressed like they are heading to the beach or a picnic right from Mass. Those are bad enough, but the ones who come so provociatvely dressed are worse. They don’t understand it isn’t a fashion show! They also don’t understand that their lack of modesty can cause someone else to sin.

We also have had the unfortunate occassion where someone in front of us was conducting a loud conversation with the people next to them, so distracting that we could not concentrate on our rosary. Finally, my husband leaned forward and asked them to either ‘zip it or take it out to the vestibule where it belongs, you are in church and people come here to pray before Mass begins’. There was a bit of indignant huffing, but they shut up!

We must pray for these people that the Holy Spirit will hit them over the head so they realize what they are at church for. Offering gentle correction may help in some instances, but not in others. The best course of action would be for the parish priests to enforce silence and dress code, but most won’t for fear of ‘driving people away’. Pet peeve: ‘Jesus doesn’t care how I am dressed, as long as I come to Mass’.

I have to agree with the comment about being provocatively dressed. And the shame is that this is not just a problem with the congregation. Yesterday, at Mass, a female EM who was certainly old enough to know better (mid 40’s) had on a skirt that ended at mid-thigh. As she was last to finish dispensing the Eucharist, we all had to watch as she sauntered across the altar in her 4 inch heels giving the congregation a show.

Yes, I’m sure that many sinned at that moment.

 

[iamrefreshed]

Oh and a PS on my last post. For those who would say:

“Jesus doesn’t care how I dress as long as I come to Mass”

He may not care but shouldn’t you show Him the respect of dressing well?

 

[allhers]

I had the unpleasant surprise of witnessing a group of people at Church, in a circle, holding hands, praying out loud before Mass, (I thought, hummmm, strange, but at least they are praying - so I said a silent prayer for them to remain silent as the rest of us prayed in silence.) Well, soon, a lot of people showed up, talking out loud, greeting one another, and those who had been praying in the circle, all had a great time inside the Church where many of us were kneeling in silent prayer. I kept praying, making a mental note to speak to Father after Mass about this. Well, low and behold, in came Father, tapped somone on the shoulder that was in prayer (kneeling in a pew) and started a conversation with them. Suddenly it became quite clear to me that saying anything to him after Mass would be fruitless, so I said a prayer for him too. During Mass, the people who had been in the circle of out loud prayer were the Ministers of Holy Communion, the Lectors, and the Ushers. (good grief), they continued, during Mass to greet people out loud whenever they noticed someone they knew whom they had previously missed. (I checked on my way out to make sure I was really in a Catholic Church, …unfortunately, I was.)

 

[Jabronie]

What is it with people that don’t allow us to simply kneel and pray. I come to church early and like to do just that, but almost every week, someone decides it’s okay to tap me on the shoulder and ask me to move, apparently oblivious to the fact that there are plenty of empty pews around that they could sit in.

 

[volzcpa]

I believe that there are many reasons for this degradation in reverence shown at Mass and in church in general. When I was in school, the nuns taught us how to act with reverence in church. We were taught to genuflect before the Blessed Sacrament, not to talk in church (not even whisper), how to fold our hand in reverence, etc. The nuns are gone from our grade schools, and along with it the teaching of reverence in church. Also, the changes of Vatican II, which were widely misinterpreted, resulted in a lessening of reverence in church.

The answer is to encourage and pray for our pastors to begin teaching the whats and whys of reverence in church. He must set standards regarding how we act, how we dress and how we pray in church. This must be done with ongoing and consistent reminders of why we are in church and what the Mass and worship is all about. These irreverent attitudes have developed over many years and, I suspect, that it will take many years to correct.

 

[severinus]

moira:

Part of what you say is true; there is a problem with religious education and the society in which we live. But it does seem to matter if the Mass is in the venacular or a Tridentine Mass. At a Tridentine Mass I don’t see people dressing inappropriately. I also don’t hear cell phones ringing and at the Tridentine Mass I attend, it is so quiet you could hear a pin drop. The reverence and quiet is much more conducive to prayer.

After attending a Tridentine Mass for a year now, I have a very hard time attending an NO Mass. I know that an NO Mass is valid and is still the Holy Sacrifice but the atmosphere is very different.

I’ve noticed the same thing. Any thoughts as to why this is the case?