RCIA and Mass Attendance

[SuscipeMeDomine]

When people inquire about RCIA in my parish I explain to them that it involves coming to church twice a week. Once a week we have our classes and I also expect to see them at Mass on Sunday morning.

I’m running into a problem with the expectation that they come to Mass. I had one person drop out of RCIA because she said the parish wasn’t welcoming to her. I only saw her at Mass a couple of times. How could the parish welcome her when they never saw her? I have someone now who comes to Mass erratically. He thinks my expectation of weekly Mass attendance is a bit far-fetched since his cradle Catholic wife only attends once a month or so. Why should he come more often than she does when he’s not Catholic yet?

I talk with them about the importance of coming to Mass even though they can’t receive the Eucharist yet. It’s an opportunity to come together with the community and to be in the presence of the Lord. It’s a chance to be strengthened, to hear to readings and homily, to pray and sing. I explain that the Church requires Catholics to come to Mass on Sundays and holy days. And I tell them that the community wants to know them and be inspired by their journey into the Church.

So far this hasn’t been a problem with catechumens, only with candidates coming from Protestant churches. (And only with some. Most of them are at Mass every Sunday and some even attend during the week.) My guess is that their former communities didn’t have the kind of emphasis we do on attendance so they never got in the habit.

The people I’ve had drop out of RCIA are the ones who don’t come to Mass regularly. I’m not sure which is the chicken and which is the egg but it seems that if they don’t develop a connection with the Mass they don’t develop a connection with the Church.

Am I unreasonable in my expectation? How can I help people develop a love for the Mass? If you work with RCIA have you run into this situation? How do you handle it?

 

[Annabelle_Marie]

I don’t know…I’m only guessing from my experience. Coming from a Protestant background…and returning to the Church. I didn’t attend church much before…now I go to Mass every Sunday, Wed, and sometimes more than that. But at first…it was working through it. There seems to be a mindset in some Protestant communities that church is about us and how we “feel” during it. So, if they don’t think they are getting what they want…and that right now is probably feelings and the Eucharist…off they go. I understand…I used to be there. But realizing that Mass is not about me…it’s about worshiping God and building up the Body of Christ…that is what keeps me attending faithfully.

PS…my husband is converting…and he is not yet in RCIA…and he rode the Seattle to Portland bicycle ride during the weekend…200 miles…came home…took a shower…and off we went to 7:30PM Mass.

 

[twopekinguys]

When people inquire about RCIA in my parish I explain to them that it involves coming to church twice a week. Once a week we have our classes and I also expect to see them at Mass on Sunday morning.

I’m running into a problem with the expectation that they come to Mass. I had one person drop out of RCIA because she said the parish wasn’t welcoming to her. I only saw her at Mass a couple of times. How could the parish welcome her when they never saw her? I have someone now who comes to Mass erratically. He thinks my expectation of weekly Mass attendance is a bit far-fetched since his cradle Catholic wife only attends once a month or so. Why should he come more often than she does when he’s not Catholic yet?

I talk with them about the importance of coming to Mass even though they can’t receive the Eucharist yet. It’s an opportunity to come together with the community and to be in the presence of the Lord. It’s a chance to be strengthened, to hear to readings and homily, to pray and sing. I explain that the Church requires Catholics to come to Mass on Sundays and holy days. And I tell them that the community wants to know them and be inspired by their journey into the Church.

So far this hasn’t been a problem with catechumens, only with candidates coming from Protestant churches. (And only with some. Most of them are at Mass every Sunday and some even attend during the week.) My guess is that their former communities didn’t have the kind of emphasis we do on attendance so they never got in the habit.

The people I’ve had drop out of RCIA are the ones who don’t come to Mass regularly. I’m not sure which is the chicken and which is the egg but it seems that if they don’t develop a connection with the Mass they don’t develop a connection with the Church.

Am I unreasonable in my expectation? How can I help people develop a love for the Mass? If you work with RCIA have you run into this situation? How do you handle it?

It’s rather funny you should start a thread like this.

I am the lay director for RCIA in our parish, and have encountered the same thing.

As far as the excuse of the parish not being welcoming, we nipped that in the bud, and have all of our RCIA team members wear name tags while at Mass. Especially during the early days of the classes. This gives the candidate a way of identifying someone from the program, and gives them someone to sit with, thus learning the Mass, and a chance for introductions after.

We had a candidate this past year that had very sporadic attendance at Mass, and when we addressed it, it was because “my wife would be alone at the Nazarene church with our kids.” We explained that our parish has Mass on Satuday evenings, and 3 Masses on Sunday, and that he should be able to attend at least one of those.

I have even gone so far as to tell our entire class, that when it comes to the Rite of Sending to Election, and the Rite of Election and Continuing Conversion, The entire congregation, their sponsors, and team, are telling the Bishop they are taking their formation seriously, and we are “recommending” them to the Bishop. I flat out tell them, you can do what you want, but I’m not lying to the Bishop. It seems to help.

We also give personal examples of making it to Mass when you didn’t really want to. For me, it was working as a bartender every Saturday night, exhausted from dealing with drunks and fights, getting home at 4-430 am, yet finding my way to 9 o’clock Mass.

Just some thoughts.

 

[kmuestwin]

Every Sunday is a holy day of obligation so yes you should expect them to go to mass every Sunday. As candidates, they are required to accept and follow the teachings of the Church. If they don’t realize from the beginning that they can’t be Catholic and do things their way, your students will think that as soon as they get out o RCIA they can become cafeteria Catholics who pick and choose what to believe.

You are right to expect them to follow the rules of the Church.

 

[FidesSpesCarita]

When I was going through RCIA (18 months worth) I went to mass every sunday (or at least I dont remember missing mass). I dont see a problem with it.

I think the problem is that many candidates dont take Catholicism, and especially the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass (Including the consecration and true presence), seriously enough. I fell in love with Catholicism right out of the box, so I know that I am bit of an anomaly, yet I still feel that people should have no excuse for missing Mass (I say this including myself). We have 168 hours in a week that we typically devote to ourselves or secular concerns, is it really so onerous a task to devote an hour or two to worship of our GOD?

I do not think it is unreasonable to expect those who wish to become Catholic (perhaps not the people who are simply searching for the truth, but those who are earnestly trying to become Catholic) to follow the rules laid out for Catholics. What I would do is emphasize the fraternal bond that grows from communal worship and prayer, along with a thorough education of what occurs during the mass. Many people dont understand why we pray as we do during the mass (rote prayers, movements, etc.) so that may help as well.

It would also have helped me greatly if, during my RCIA stint, there had been more of a communal atmosphere before and after mass, somewhat like what you see in Evangelical/pentecostal churches. Would it be possible to have the whole RCIA group have coffee and donuts after mass? You might also include non-RCIA members and staff into this. The RCIA staff could all donate $10 a week for this, since places like dunkin donuts have rather inexpensive coffee boxes and donuts it would not be too expensive. I intend to do something like this when my girlfriend finally jumps on the wagon and comes home to Mother Church.

But thats just one mans opinion.

FSC

 

[puzzleannie]

same thread but just substitute “confirmation candidates” or “first communion candidates” or “children and families preparing for first communion” for same complaint. In this diocese we are not allowed to take attendance, get bulletins signed, use envelopes or in any other way check attendance but the problem is perennial.

For the first time this year we will be able to do proper dismissal with proper breaking open the Word for all 3 age groups, child, youth and adult, in English and Spanish. It has taken 9 years to build the RCIA team to this point, so that we actually have a team. Families will understand from the beginning that attendance at the Mass where their group is dismissed is part of the preparation, beginning with the Rite of Acceptance, and the actual doctrine class will be moved to any of several other days and times during the week. After Rite of Welcoming candidates will be given the option of joining us for the scripture portion, but Father is adamant if they miss the rites, which will happen during the “designated” Mass, they are not ready to make the commitment and it would be unfair to allow them to proceed. We also hope to do a better job helping them pick godparents who will participate in the rites of Lent.

We are putting much more stress on Mystagogy, much more explanation of what it is and why it is necessary. Adults are pretty good about attending, but children and youth will be gone with the wind the day after Easter. If anybody knows how to change this I’d love to hear it.

 

[rebecca123]

You say that you haven’t had this problem with catechumens, only the converting protestants.

Have you ever thought how the converting protestants feel being lumped together with unbaptized converts? Some protestants have faithfully served Christ for years according to the knowledge they have. What does it say when you teach them with people who are not yet baptized?

It sends the message that you don’t really believe that they are Christians. I had a priest say to me in RCIA that “we have to say you’re a Christian because you say you are”. That tells me a lot. Even with “proof” of valid baptism in another denomination.

If we really believe in the 'separated brethren" concept, then it just isn’t right to be having faithful separated brethren going through the same rites and rituals as the unbaptized. I believe there is some protocol on this, but many churches ignore it. It’s too bad.

There should be separate programs for those who are validly baptized and are faithfully living for Christ and those who have not yet begun. It only makes sense.

 

[Contra_Mundum_1]

There should be separate programs for those who are validly baptized and are faithfully living for Christ and those who have not yet begun. It only makes sense.

I disagree. So many protestant beliefs are so different that it makes perfect sense to put converts together with the unbaptised. They all learn together.

 

[joe_cool]

I disagree. So many protestant beliefs are so different that it makes perfect sense to put converts together with the unbaptised. They all learn together.

I agree. Look - existing history with a church of some sort or not… you’re all human beings who have varying levels of understanding on subjects that will be presented during RCIA. The protestants and the unbaptized can help each other.

 

[PJM]

=SuscipeMeDomine;6864152]When people inquire about RCIA in my parish I explain to them that it involves coming to church twice a week. Once a week we have our classes and I also expect to see them at Mass on Sunday morning.

I’m running into a problem with the expectation that they come to Mass. I had one person drop out of RCIA because she said the parish wasn’t welcoming to her. I only saw her at Mass a couple of times. How could the parish welcome her when they never saw her? I have someone now who comes to Mass erratically. He thinks my expectation of weekly Mass attendance is a bit far-fetched since his cradle Catholic wife only attends once a month or so. Why should he come more often than she does when he’s not Catholic yet?

I talk with them about the importance of coming to Mass even though they can’t receive the Eucharist yet. It’s an opportunity to come together with the community and to be in the presence of the Lord. It’s a chance to be strengthened, to hear to readings and homily, to pray and sing. I explain that the Church requires Catholics to come to Mass on Sundays and holy days. And I tell them that the community wants to know them and be inspired by their journey into the Church.

So far this hasn’t been a problem with catechumens, only with candidates coming from Protestant churches. (And only with some. Most of them are at Mass every Sunday and some even attend during the week.) My guess is that their former communities didn’t have the kind of emphasis we do on attendance so they never got in the habit.

The people I’ve had drop out of RCIA are the ones who don’t come to Mass regularly. I’m not sure which is the chicken and which is the egg but it seems that if they don’t develop a connection with the Mass they don’t develop a connection with the Church.

Am I unreasonable in my expectation? How can I help people develop a love for the Mass? If you work with RCIA have you run into this situation? How do you handle it?

Some suggestions based on experience.

1. point out that in Exo. 20 Keep holy the Sabath day is one of GOD’s COMMADEMNTS not an option.
2. reduce your expetiations to what the Church teaches: Sunday and Holyday mandatory attendance. Allow them to grow into more.
3. If this mandate by you precedes instruction of WHAT THE MASS IS supported biblically
   youre looking for poor results.
4. One of the the common difference between Catholic Worship which is GOD CENTERED [expalin WHY it is] and Protestant worship which focuses on fellowship FIRST; God second because they do not have the REAL PRESENCE OF JESUS IN THERE MIDST an we do. You MUST expain what and why we do what we do Be fore demanding any MANDATORY Mass Attendance. Mass is NOT about fellowship; NO! It Glory, Honor and Praise to our God.

Fellowship in the Catholic Church usually takespalce outside of The Mass. Set proper expetiations.

Love and prayers,
Pat

 

[SuscipeMeDomine]

I appreciate everyone’s responses here. It seems that my expectations about coming to Mass are not out of line. It’s comforting in knowing that others are in the same position.

 

[doughnut]

I disagree. So many protestant beliefs are so different that it makes perfect sense to put converts together with the unbaptised. They all learn together.

just to add on to that, there are many unbaptised, who knew about Christ long before they decide to embark on the RCIA program…so their status of being unbaptised does not necessarily make them more ignorant then the protestant counterparts either.

 

[excubitor]

When people inquire about RCIA in my parish I explain to them that it involves coming to church twice a week. Once a week we have our classes and I also expect to see them at Mass on Sunday morning.

I’m running into a problem with the expectation that they come to Mass. I had one person drop out of RCIA because she said the parish wasn’t welcoming to her. I only saw her at Mass a couple of times. How could the parish welcome her when they never saw her? I have someone now who comes to Mass erratically. He thinks my expectation of weekly Mass attendance is a bit far-fetched since his cradle Catholic wife only attends once a month or so. Why should he come more often than she does when he’s not Catholic yet?

I talk with them about the importance of coming to Mass even though they can’t receive the Eucharist yet. It’s an opportunity to come together with the community and to be in the presence of the Lord. It’s a chance to be strengthened, to hear to readings and homily, to pray and sing. I explain that the Church requires Catholics to come to Mass on Sundays and holy days. And I tell them that the community wants to know them and be inspired by their journey into the Church.

So far this hasn’t been a problem with catechumens, only with candidates coming from Protestant churches. (And only with some. Most of them are at Mass every Sunday and some even attend during the week.) My guess is that their former communities didn’t have the kind of emphasis we do on attendance so they never got in the habit.

The people I’ve had drop out of RCIA are the ones who don’t come to Mass regularly. I’m not sure which is the chicken and which is the egg but it seems that if they don’t develop a connection with the Mass they don’t develop a connection with the Church.

Am I unreasonable in my expectation? How can I help people develop a love for the Mass? If you work with RCIA have you run into this situation? How do you handle it?

As a converting protestant I had this problem too. Protestant churches are like a community where people hang around to socialise, wheras Catholics rush off after mass. Its a race to see who can get out of the car park first. Catholics will avoid each other in case a chance meeting might delay their escape from Church. This is hard for protestants who are used to being fawned upon when a new face appears at the door of the church and who feel that the tea and biscuits is just as an important part of the service as the sermon.(not that they would admit they feel that)

Have a talk to the struggling converts about this issue. If you can find a support group of protestants who have converted who can set up a little tea and biscuits table in a hall near the church and who can form a friendly welcome group for the new converts. Of course this will be very hard to achieve because these converted protestants will have very quickly converted to join the “race out of church” and will probably have as many excuses to not stay at mass, as these converts are making to not attend mass at all. However making new converts welcomed and loved will bear more fruit than laying down the law to them.

Having said all that though, in the end it is the individuals personal commitment which will see them across the line to admission into the church. We can only do so much to help. The other thing I suggest is that the priest should talk to these people. Really the RCIA programs should be run by priests. I think it is tragic that new converts cannot receive intimate personal one on one direction from a priest. Personally, I sought out a priest who could give me this individual attention when I was converting. Perhaps your protestant converts need some one on one guidance from a priest.

By the way it is shocking that the new converts wife is only coming to church once a month. Again I would get the priest to speak to this woman and explain to her how here shocking behaviour is threatening not only her eternal salvation but the eternal salvation of her husband as well.

 

[StrawberryJam]

When people inquire about RCIA in my parish I explain to them that it involves coming to church twice a week. Once a week we have our classes and I also expect to see them at Mass on Sunday morning.

I’m running into a problem with the expectation that they come to Mass. I had one person drop out of RCIA because she said the parish wasn’t welcoming to her. I only saw her at Mass a couple of times. How could the parish welcome her when they never saw her? I have someone now who comes to Mass erratically. He thinks my expectation of weekly Mass attendance is a bit far-fetched since his cradle Catholic wife only attends once a month or so. Why should he come more often than she does when he’s not Catholic yet?

I talk with them about the importance of coming to Mass even though they can’t receive the Eucharist yet. It’s an opportunity to come together with the community and to be in the presence of the Lord. It’s a chance to be strengthened, to hear to readings and homily, to pray and sing. I explain that the Church requires Catholics to come to Mass on Sundays and holy days. And I tell them that the community wants to know them and be inspired by their journey into the Church.

So far this hasn’t been a problem with catechumens, only with candidates coming from Protestant churches. (And only with some. Most of them are at Mass every Sunday and some even attend during the week.) My guess is that their former communities didn’t have the kind of emphasis we do on attendance so they never got in the habit.

The people I’ve had drop out of RCIA are the ones who don’t come to Mass regularly. I’m not sure which is the chicken and which is the egg but it seems that if they don’t develop a connection with the Mass they don’t develop a connection with the Church.

Am I unreasonable in my expectation? How can I help people develop a love for the Mass? If you work with RCIA have you run into this situation? How do you handle it?

The catholic church I attend has RCIA classes scheduled on Sunday. Everyone in RCIA goes to Mass every Sunday. Period.

 

[joe_cool]

As a converting protestant I had this problem too. Protestant churches are like a community where people hang around to socialise, wheras Catholics rush off after mass. Its a race to see who can get out of the car park first. Catholics will avoid each other in case a chance meeting might delay their escape from Church.

This is a horrible generalization. I had a conversation with my priest awhile back… about the parish closures in Cleveland. At the time, I was only known in two parishes. I said that I was certain that other parishes would welcome any of us gladly, and in a sense there’s no such thing as “my parish” because they’re all “my parish”. We spoke of this generalization, and how I thought it HAD to be the exception, rather than the rule.

Since then, I’ve been using Saturday mass to visit other parishes, and I’ve started attending weekday mass at another.

Know what I found out?

At every parish they welcomed me as a stranger with as warm a welcome as one could ever ask for. One invited me to an after-mass Bible study, and at another I was invited to coffee afterward by a parishioner.

I have YET to catch a cold shoulder.

My observation of such things is this: if you seem unapproachable… people won’t approach you. If you’ve got a warm smile on your face and you seem to have a friendly disposition… people will want to be around you.

 

[excubitor]

This is a horrible generalization. I had a conversation with my priest awhile back… about the parish closures in Cleveland. At the time, I was only known in two parishes. I said that I was certain that other parishes would welcome any of us gladly, and in a sense there’s no such thing as “my parish” because they’re all “my parish”. We spoke of this generalization, and how I thought it HAD to be the exception, rather than the rule.

Since then, I’ve been using Saturday mass to visit other parishes, and I’ve started attending weekday mass at another.

Know what I found out?

At every parish they welcomed me as a stranger with as warm a welcome as one could ever ask for. One invited me to an after-mass Bible study, and at another I was invited to coffee afterward by a parishioner.

As far as I am concerned Catholics can learn a lot from the protestants with regards to making the church a community of believers. At least in my area anyway.

I have YET to catch a cold shoulder.

My observation of such things is this: if you seem unapproachable… people won’t approach you. If you’ve got a warm smile on your face and you seem to have a friendly disposition… people will want to be around you.

I’m glad if its a gross generalisation. But that is how it is in my neck of the woods. And I do not have an unapproachable disposition, at least I have never had this kind of problem at our protestant fellowships. My family was always one of the last to leave church.

 

[FidesSpesCarita]

I’m glad if its a gross generalisation. But that is how it is in my neck of the woods. And I do not have an unapproachable disposition, at least I have never had this kind of problem at our protestant fellowships. My family was always one of the last to leave church.

When you add something to someone else’s quote, it is generally helpful to change the color, make it bold, bigger, anything to tell the next reader that it is an addition.

FTR, I agree with you, to a point. I have yet to see anyone be rude in their mad dash to flee the Church after mass, but at all three parishes in my town, there are very few of those and usually they are the families with infants who actually NEED to run.

I think it would be a very good idea to have a “tea an biscuits” hour after mass for the RCIA folks, although I would make it coffee and donuts. But there again, I think that would be a good idea for the entire parish to take part in.

FSC

 

[SuscipeMeDomine]

The catholic church I attend has RCIA classes scheduled on Sunday. Everyone in RCIA goes to Mass every Sunday. Period.

I wonder how it works out for the catechists leading dismissals. When it’s my turn to lead the dismissal I usually just stay and attend the next Mass. That wouldn’t be an option if our RCIA session was scheduled at that time. I suppose there’s always Mass on Saturday evening.

I think it would be a very good idea to have a “tea an biscuits” hour after mass for the RCIA folks, although I would make it coffee and donuts. But there again, I think that would be a good idea for the entire parish to take part in.

My parish has coffee and donuts after Mass and we encourage the folks in RCIA to take part. Some of the sponsors make it a point to meet with their candidates/catechumens for coffee. It gives them a chance to talk and also to introduce people to parishioners. If the sponsor isn’t around then the catechists do the introductions. We want the RCIA folks to get to know people in the parish.

 

[StrawberryJam]

Regarding dismissals.

Our parish is considered large. The RCIA class varies I am told, but seems to gain at least on a minimum over the last 5 years just nearly 30 people. Not all 30 or so stick it out.
Most do because they are there due to the fact they are getting married to a catholic.
That may not reflect other parishes RCIA, but this is merely my observation after popping in for the first few weeks, then getting private teaching with a priest after that.
Edit to add: Forgot my point in saying all this. Sorry.
The RCIA in my parish is led by a priest.
That may be why a dismissal concern, is of no concern in my parish. They all go.

 

[sharonr]

same thread but just substitute “confirmation candidates” or “first communion candidates” or “children and families preparing for first communion” for same complaint. In this diocese we are not allowed to take attendance, get bulletins signed, use envelopes or in any other way check attendance but the problem is perennial.

For the first time this year we will be able to do proper dismissal with proper breaking open the Word for all 3 age groups, child, youth and adult, in English and Spanish. It has taken 9 years to build the RCIA team to this point, so that we actually have a team. Families will understand from the beginning that attendance at the Mass where their group is dismissed is part of the preparation, beginning with the Rite of Acceptance, and the actual doctrine class will be moved to any of several other days and times during the week. After Rite of Welcoming candidates will be given the option of joining us for the scripture portion, but Father is adamant if they miss the rites, which will happen during the “designated” Mass, they are not ready to make the commitment and it would be unfair to allow them to proceed. We also hope to do a better job helping them pick godparents who will participate in the rites of Lent.

We are putting much more stress on Mystagogy, much more explanation of what it is and why it is necessary. Adults are pretty good about attending, but children and youth will be gone with the wind the day after Easter. If anybody knows how to change this I’d love to hear it.