Re-vert needs help

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Hello. This is a wonderful forum. I have been reading and learning so much here the past couple of weeks. I am a cradle Catholic who fell away from the church, and now find myself being called back in a big way. I have had many signs over the past year that coming back to the church is the right thing for me to do. I am planning to start RCIA in the fall since I never made my Confirmation and also because I want to learn all I can.

I have discovered the presence of evil over the past couple of months. Prior to this time, I never really believed in the true existence of evil spirits. However, I am finding the deeper I get into my spiritual journey, I feel the real presence of evil trying to get in my way. I almost feel there is a battle for my soul going on right now. I feel funny even saying that because it sounds so strange but this is truly how I feel. Last night was the worst ever. I could feel an evil presence in my bedroom all night and I was tormented by images of demons every time I closed my eyes. I prayed all night and got little sleep. I know Jesus will protect me and do not feel really threatened by this, more annoyed and also a little frightened. Any advice or words of encouragement? I would also like to hear from others who may have gone through this.
 
I would not be surprized if the evil one was doing everything possible to avoid losing you to God. Try asking St. Michael the Archangel to defend you in battle, and Mother Mary to protect you with her prayer also.
 
A priest once told me when you feel that your under attack from the devil then you know you’re on the right track with God!

Can you make an appointment with a priest so that you can have spiritual guidance during this difficult time?

Can you also go do an hour of Eucharistic Adoration? Many graces are bestowed upon those who spend an hour in prayer.

Have you heard of St. Padre Pio? He is one of my favorite saints…He was always under attack from the devil but the Lord and Our Lady always helped him; ask for his intercession. If you are interested in reading the lives of the saints; try reading some of his books.

Pray the rosary, attend Mass regularly and ask for Our Blessed Mother to protect you! You’re in my prayers!!!
 
Thank you both for your replies! It feels odd to talk about this because, as I said, I did not even believe in the existence of evil until very recently, and I’m not completely comfortable talking about it. Unfortunately, my wonderful parish priest was reassigned and we do not know who our new priest will be. I have been trying to pray the rosary every night, although last night I did not. I find I sleep wonderfully after saying the rosary! I do attend mass every week. I want to attend Eucharistic Adoration. I have never done that. I am fascinated by the lives of Saints. I just started reading a book about St. Teresa. I am very interested in St.Padre Pio and will try to learn more about him. I know I am on the right track. I have prayed hard about my direction in life and have been given very clear signs that I need to come back to the church and do the RCIA program. I feel like the evil one is trying to trip me up. Thank you for the ideas and even more for the validation. 🙂
 
K_M,

You are correct - demons don’t like it when we convert (or revert) and try to interfere with our progress.

Fr. Gabriele Amorth, the exorcist of Rome, says that the confessional takes more souls from Satan than exorcism takes back bodies. If you haven’t been to confession yet, I recommend going soon.

As for the evil presence at night, I recommend this prayer:
In the name of the Lord Jesus Christ, strengthened by the intercession of the Immaculate Virgin Mary, Mother of God, of Blessed Michael the Archangel, of the Blessed Apostles Peter and Paul, and all the Saints and Angels of Heaven, and powerful in the holy authority of the name His Name, I subject my mind and my dreams only to the work of the Holy Spirit. I ask you Lord to bind up all powers of darkness and forbid them to work in my dreams or any part of my subconscious while I sleep. Amen.
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There are more spiritual warfare prayers here.

If you still have problems after confession and prayers, visit the SPCDC Help Page for more advice.
 
I too urge you to go to confession right away if you have not already. Whoever the new priest is ask him to come over and bless your home, and alone or with the help of the priest throw out any new age junk you may have such as books crystals etc. Pray the St Michael prayer and the Rosary.
 
Do you know of Father Corapi?? I just ran across this dvd/or cd on his site…
Surrender Is Not An Option
fathercorapi.com/surrender.aspx
Looks like a really good one. He says this:
In this four part series, Father John Corapi explores the reality of spiritual warfare and how it involves the family. Using Sacred Scripture and other official Church documents, Father Corapi vigorously asserts that this war is real. To deny this fundamental fact is at once foolhardy and reckless…
At this rare conference where this series was filmed, Father gave talks on two seperate days, one to an all women’s audience, the next to an all men’s audience. This series is a must for all of the members of the Family of God.
You can even preview it on that page.👍
 
K_M said:
Thank you both for your replies! It feels odd to talk about this because, as I said, I did not even believe in the existence of evil until very recently, and I’m not completely comfortable talking about it. Unfortunately, my wonderful parish priest was reassigned and we do not know who our new priest will be. I have been trying to pray the rosary every night, although last night I did not. I find I sleep wonderfully after saying the rosary! I do attend mass every week.
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That’s who it happened to me similarly. I said to myself…well, I knew there was something going on and part of it didn’t look like from God but Evil himself. Then I said to myself, if there was evil, there must be God. Even if I have always believed in God, something happened to me, similar to yours, has helped me trying to follow the faith faithfully. This thing has happened to you only with God’s permission.

Praying the Rosary is the most important thing for you right now.

God bless.
 
Frequent confession (along with Holy Communion and praying the Rosary) is one of the best weapons available.

If you ever made your first confession and received First Communion, I would recommend going to confession immediately (don’t wait until after RCIA) and confessing all the serious sins you may have committed since your last confession (even if it has been many years). Then go to Mass EVERY Sunday and holy day of obligation (and weekdays when you are able) and receive Communion. Go to confession regularly (every couple of weeks, or right away if you commit a serious sin) so you won’t let the evil one get a hold on you.

If you have never received these sacraments, you may need a little catechesis first, but if you did, they are already available to you.
 
Hi “K_M”. Welcome to CAF! I’m so happy to hear that you’re coming “Home”! God bless you. Have courage!

I too, am a “re-vert” (I returned to the Church about 3 years ago)… after an absence of 10 years. I haven’t regretted it for one moment. The only thing I regret… are the wasted 10 years. My experience has similarities… to what you’re describing. The enemy did its BEST to frighten and molest me, too. To keep me from returning to Our Lord. The devil will do anything in its power, to keep us AWAY from the Church. But remember, it can only do what God permits. And no more. (And remember also, that God is on YOUR side 😉 ).

I would strongly recommend… that you place yourself under the Protection and Guidance of Our Blessed Mother, Mary. Because she always, always… leads us to Jesus. She has protected me, in a way… which I can’t even begin to describe. She loves us ALL… very much. And will certainly respond to you, in your time of need. Do you have a Brown Scapular? If not, I would suggest that you get one… have a priest “invest” you, and then… wear the Brown Scapular. I’ve had mine on, for over 3 years now. It is a part of me.

I would also like to remind you of the words of Our dear Lord:

“Peace I leave you, My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Do not let your hearts be troubled, or be afraid.” (John 18:27)

Pray the Rosary, the Chaplet of Divine Mercy… and return to the Church and the Sacraments… as soon as possible. You will not regret it. My prayers are with you. God bless. 🙂
 
Make the sign of the Cross with Holy Water and then bless the room with it.
You’ll sleep well.
 
PhilotheaZ said:
Frequent confession (along with Holy Communion and praying the Rosary) is one of the best weapons available.

If you ever made your first confession and received First Communion, I would recommend going to confession immediately (don’t wait until after RCIA) and confessing all the serious sins you may have committed since your last confession (even if it has been many years). Then go to Mass EVERY Sunday and holy day of obligation (and weekdays when you are able) and receive Communion. Go to confession regularly (every couple of weeks, or right away if you commit a serious sin) so you won’t let the evil one get a hold on you.

If you have never received these sacraments, you may need a little catechesis first, but if you did, they are already available to you.
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I have been baptised and have made my 1st communion, but I have never been to confession & I’m afraid!

When praying yesterday I very clearly got a message that I need to go to confession. There is no doubt in my mind this is what God is telling me to do. I don’t really know what to do or say. It’s so intimidating. Help!
 
K_M said:
When praying yesterday I very clearly got a message that I need to go to confession. There is no doubt in my mind this is what God is telling me to do. I don’t really know what to do or say. It’s so intimidating. Help!
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Dear K_M, here’s what to do.
  1. Make an examination of conscience to identify your sins. I use this one, and then write them down on a small piece of paper to take with me. Make sure not to withhold any sins on purpose, if you do you invalidate your confession and have to confess everything again, including the sin you withheld. It’s different if you honestly forget to tell one; you have not invalidated your confession in that situation.
  2. Once you arrive, the priest will begin with the sign of the cross.
  3. Say, "bless me Father, for I have sinned, it has been ____ since my last confession (or in your case, this is my first confession). These are my sins: (list your sins in kind and number of times each sin was committed).
When finished say, For these and all the sins of my life I am sorry.
  1. The priest may speak about your sins and offer advice, and will assign you a penance. The priest will likely prompt you when it is time to say the Act of Contrition. Here’s the one I use:
My God, I am sorry for my sins with all my heart. In choosing to do wrong and failing to do good, I have sinned against Thee whom I should love above all. I firmly intend, with Thy help, to do penance, to sin no more, and to avoid whatever leads me to sin. Amen.
  1. Afterwards the priest will give you absolution and dismiss you.
  2. A good time to do penance is right after confession. Penance generally involves saying certain prayers the priest assigns you. I usually head to the pews, kneel and do my penance before I leave the Church.
 
Thank you beckycmarie. The examination of conscience is quite helpful, however, I fear I’ll be in the confessional all day :eek: I’m not sure how to figure out the number of times I’ve done something either. Should I say “hundreds” of times or just “many” times? Maybe I’ve done a particular thing thousands or times :confused:

This may sound dumb, but I don’t even know where to go. Where in the church is confession usually held? My parish does not have a priest right now. I am thinking of going to confession in a different parish. All this is very unnerving to me & I feel like I can’t do it.
😦
 
K_M said:
Thank you beckycmarie. The examination of conscience is quite helpful, however, I fear I’ll be in the confessional all day :eek: I’m not sure how to figure out the number of times I’ve done something either. Should I say “hundreds” of times or just “many” times? Maybe I’ve done a particular thing thousands or times :confused:

This may sound dumb, but I don’t even know where to go. Where in the church is confession usually held? My parish does not have a priest right now. I am thinking of going to confession in a different parish. All this is very unnerving to me & I feel like I can’t do it.
😦
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Chin up! Don’t despair! Reconciliation is something to be desired, not something to fear. You are approaching Jesus in the sacrament, you are receiving forgiveness for your sins. You may be trepidacious now, but you will feel so much better once you have been. I went 11 years without a confession, and I wasn’t in there all day. And I’m about as far from being a saint as Australia is from England. 😛

You will have to find a priest to hear your confession, so if that means a different parish, then that’s what you’ll have to do. Call up the office of your next nearest parish and ask when they hear confessions. If your schedule does not permit, then you can always schedule an appointment for a confession. Don’t be afraid to do this!

As for feeling protected from the evil that is interfering with your reversion, I suggest you have some religious articles in sight to give you comfort. Definitely have a crucifix on the wall in your bedroom so you can see Him when you wake and before you sleep. Another tool to give you comfort and strength is the Green Scapular. Place one in your bedroom, and pray every day for yourself and others in need of conversion “Immaculate Heart of Mary, pray for us now and at the hour of our death.” This is a very powerful devotion which should give you great peace and consolation.

And PRAY! Give thanks to God for calling you back to Him, and thanks for your ears that have heard!

May God the Father bless us,
may God the Son heal us,
may the Holy Spirit enlighten us and give us
eyes to see with,
ears to hear with, and hands to do the work of God with,
feet to walk with and a mouth to preach the
word of salvation with, and the angel of peace to watch over us
and lead us at last, by our Lord’s gift, to the kingdom.
 
K_M said:
Thank you beckycmarie. The examination of conscience is quite helpful, however, I fear I’ll be in the confessional all day :eek: I’m not sure how to figure out the number of times I’ve done something either. Should I say “hundreds” of times or just “many” times? Maybe I’ve done a particular thing thousands or times :confused:

This may sound dumb, but I don’t even know where to go. Where in the church is confession usually held? My parish does not have a priest right now. I am thinking of going to confession in a different parish. All this is very unnerving to me & I feel like I can’t do it.
😦
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If you don’t know an exact number just let the priest know you don’t know an exact number but give an estimate.

Most churches have a reconciliation room that is identified as such with a sign. It’s usually a very small room - maybe the size of a walk-in closet. You can always ask someone at the church to point you in the right direction.
 
I’m converting myself, and I can assure you that when I made my decision to join the RCC, that very night I had horrific dreams of possessed people. They were breathing heavily and I could see their breath rising into the cold air. They stared at me with shark eyes. That’s the only way I can describe this. What a horrible night! Dawn came and my mom unloaded on me in a fit of rage. I was very hurt and dumbfounded in the extreme. That’s simply not liker her. Well, in order to combat evil. I say the rosary. I find it quite comforting and I think my prayer life with the aid of the rosary is indeed effective in our conducting the fight against oppression, temptation, and evil. Go before mass and say it with a group. I hope this helps. I know where you’re coming from, I do.:o
 
Hi K_M,

I remember when I went through RCIA in 2005-2006 and had a rough time; especially close to the Easter Vigil. I had new temptations to deal with. You’re not alone. Hang in there!
 
K_M said:
Hello. This is a wonderful forum. I have been reading and learning so much here the past couple of weeks. I am a cradle Catholic who fell away from the church,

I have told many people that when I am being hounded by loose thoughts people cursing me, sexual thoughts, distractions come to get in the way of my doing what I wish to do spiritually, this is hte reason why…
When I feel that I under attack from the devil then I know I’m on the right track with God, and I rejoice and praise God thanking Him for my life and then I say these words.
“saitin in the name of Jesus Christ I rebuke you and tell you to get right away from my mind and go straight to the feet of Jesus Christ on the cross for your judgment and do not touch any other person on the way. And I claim this in the name of my loving savour Jesus Christ”.

This always works.
Godbless
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K_M said:
Hello. This is a wonderful forum. I have been reading and learning so much here the past couple of weeks. I am a cradle Catholic who fell away from the church, and now find myself being called back in a big way. I have had many signs over the past year that coming back to the church is the right thing for me to do. I am planning to start RCIA in the fall since I never made my Confirmation and also because I want to learn all I can.

I have discovered the presence of evil over the past couple of months. Prior to this time, I never really believed in the true existence of evil spirits. However, I am finding the deeper I get into my spiritual journey, I feel the real presence of evil trying to get in my way. I almost feel there is a battle for my soul going on right now. I feel funny even saying that because it sounds so strange but this is truly how I feel. Last night was the worst ever. I could feel an evil presence in my bedroom all night and I was tormented by images of demons every time I closed my eyes. I prayed all night and got little sleep. I know Jesus will protect me and do not feel really threatened by this, more annoyed and also a little frightened. Any advice or words of encouragement? I would also like to hear from others who may have gone through this.
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angelfire.com/ca3/rafaelm…athepieta.html
catholicforum.com/churche…vinemercy1.htm
our.homewithgod.com/divinemercy/
 
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