Really Struggling: I think I hate my parents

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I am really struggling with anger towards my narcissist parents. I finally stood up to them and it got ugly. They got physically violent, stole my things, destroyed our family by telling lies about me, etc. So much gaslighting and blaming ME for everything when I am the one who was wronged. I know I will never get an apology. I am so tired of forgiving them my entire life for things they aren’t even sorry for because they don’t think their actions were wrong.

But it’s not just what they do, but how they talk to me and their overall demeanor. The entitlement! Now that I am out of their mindset, I am seeing my childhood for what it truly was and it makes me so angry at all the injustices I’ve had to put with. Some memories send chills up my spine. I actually think I hate my dad- he is a bully inside and out. The thought of picking out a Father’s day card makes me want to vomit. They call themselves and I quote “excellent parents.” I am just here fuming at all they’ve done. And to top it off, my entire family hates me so I have no one- besides friends.

I guess I am having trouble forgiving because I am just exhausted from doing it. I don’t know how much more I can forgive people who think they can do whatever they want, whenever they want and can step on whoever gets in the way. They have taken so much from me. I am just hoping that if I can handle this gracefully, it will take time off of purgatory. One can pray…
 
Hail Mary,
Full of grace,
The Lord is with Thee.
Blessed art Thou amongst women,
and blessed is the fruit of Thy womb,
Jesus.
Holy Mary,
Mother of God,
Pray for us sinners,
Now and at the hour of death,
Amen.
 
Hail Mary,
Full of Grace,
The Lord is with thee.
Blessed art thou among women,
and blessed is the fruit
of thy womb, Jesus.
Holy Mary,
Mother of God,
pray for us sinners now,
and at the hour of death.
Amen.
 
Remembering you and your family in my daily prayers. God bless.
 
TOBaddict said:
I am really struggling with anger towards my narcissist parents. I finally stood up to them and it got ugly. They got physically violent, stole my things, destroyed our family by telling lies about me, etc. So much gaslighting and blaming ME for everything when I am the one who was wronged. I know I will never get an apology. I am so tired of forgiving them my entire life for things they aren’t even sorry for because they don’t think their actions were wrong.

But it’s not just what they do, but how they talk to me and their overall demeanor. The entitlement! Now that I am out of their mindset, I am seeing my childhood for what it truly was and it makes me so angry at all the injustices I’ve had to put with. Some memories send chills up my spine. I actually think I hate my dad- he is a bully inside and out. The thought of picking out a Father’s day card makes me want to vomit. They call themselves and I quote “excellent parents.” I am just here fuming at all they’ve done. And to top it off, my entire family hates me so I have no one- besides friends.

I guess I am having trouble forgiving because I am just exhausted from doing it. I don’t know how much more I can forgive people who think they can do whatever they want, whenever they want and can step on whoever gets in the way. They have taken so much from me. I am just hoping that if I can handle this gracefully, it will take time off of purgatory. One can pray…
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My daughter just gave birth to my seventh grandchild yesterday. Who knows how he will be when he grows up. This is their second child. They love and care for him just like your mom and dad cared for you. Someday there will come a time when with all of their individual personalities will clash. You are unique and not fitting all expectations of your parents so you are at a clashing point. Try not to hate, but to understand that your parents have faults just like you do. Swallow your pride and get your dad a nice father’s day card. You will not regret it later.
 
Prayer for Family

Heavenly Father,
Please shine your light upon this family. Give them the strength to overcome the difficulties that they are dealing with now. Protect them against all problems they may encounter in the future. O Lord, please bring them together as they are meant to be. May the love that binds them grow stronger as they fulfill the destiny you have laid out for them.

Grant this family forgiveness for any sins they have committed. May they also forgive one another, Lord, as it is sometimes difficult to do.

Through Christ Our Lord, amen.

:signofcross:

​
 
Forgiveness is not easy. It is an ongoing process. You know you have forgiven when you no longer feel the hurts. It may take a long time. You need to process these things and then move on. Maybe a counselor could help.

I know what I am talking about because I was assaulted back in 2002. It took time to heal, and it disrupted my life. I can go to the inmate data base and gloat over the time this person will be in prison. For a long time I lived in fear.

Now, I let go. I am not concentrating on him. He’s gone as far as I am concerned, and God will take care of this in anyway He wants.

I am saying that forgiveness is not a feeling exactly. It is a reality that sets you free from what happened and what hurt you.

Not everyone has the ideal childhood, and not everyone leaves this earth unscathed. Unfortunately everyone hurts.

When considering parental problems, it may help to realize that you survived and you are alive. So many children are killed by their own parents. Likewise some parents are killed by their children. Hate poisons not the person upon whom it is poured, but the vessel in which it is stored. Like a corrosive, it will eat away until there is nothing left.
 
Praying for you…
+

O most beautiful Flower of Mount Carmel, Fruitful Vine, Splendor of Heaven, who brought forth the Son of God still remaining a Virgin, assist us in this necessity.
O Star of the Sea, help us, and show us that you are our Mother.

O Holy Mary, Mother of God, Queen of Heaven and earth, we humbly ask you from the depths of our heart to help in this necessity. There are none who can withstand your power.
O show us that you are our Mother.

O Mary, conceived without sin, pray for us who have recourse to thee. Sweet Mother, we place this cause in your hands. Amen.

Flos Carmel
 
I am sorry you are struggling with this impaired relationship with your parents. I will pray you find some peace in this situation at some point in time, and that with God’s grace this relationship can improve as time goes on.

Mary.
 
You have written this several time and posted it. You have been offered good advice and many prayer. You don’t seem to want to “let go.” Hatred is more damaging to yourself that it is to those who offend. When you hate you push God aside and make room for the devil and he thanks for it. He will be happy to fill the space Where God’s love should be present and reside.

Often it takes a life time to forgive and come to terms with any offenses inflected on one’s self. You need to put prayers into your effort. Our prayers are very helpful and freely given, but in the end it is up to you to open your heart and soul to all the good in your life.

Not knowing a lot about you or your situation, what is fact or percieved, I can only say that I will pray for you, but you must pray for yourself and your family as well. Peace and prayer.
 
Saint Michael, the archangel, defend us in battle, be our defense against the wickedness and snares of the devil, may God rebuke him, we humbly pray. And do you, O’ Prince of the Heavenly host, by the power of God thrust into Hell Satan and all the other evil spirits who prowl about the world for the ruin of souls.

Amen.

†

Our Father who art in Heaven, hallowed be thy name.

Thy kingdom come, thy will be done on Earth as it is in Heaven.

Give us this day our daily bread.

And forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us.

And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.

Amen.

†

Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee.

Blessed are you among women, and blessed is the fruit of your womb Jesus.

Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death.

Amen.

†

For Help in Trials

Most holy apostle St. Jude, faithful servant and friend of Jesus, the name of the traitor who delivered your beloved Master into the hands of His enemies has caused you to be forgotten by many. But the Church honors and invokes you universally as the patron of hopeless cases–of things despaired of. Pray for me who feels so hopeless. Make use, I implore you, of that particular privilege accorded to you of bringing visible and speedy help where help is almost despaired of. Come to my assistance in this great need, that I may receive the consolations and succor of heaven in all my necessities, tribulations and sufferings, in particular TOBaddict, and that I may bless God with you and all the elect throughout eternity. I promise you, O Blessed St. Jude, to be ever mindful of this great favor, and I will never cease to honor you as my special and powerful patron, and to do all in my power to encourage devotion to you. Amen.

†
 
Praying that you may find healing and peace.

Are you seeking counseling or therapy?
 
The Peace Prayer of St. Francis

Lord, make me an instrument of Your peace;
Where there is hatred, let me sow love;
Where there is injury, pardon;
Where there is doubt, faith;
Where there is despair, hope;
Where there is darkness, light;
And where there is sadness, joy.

O Divine Master,
Grant that I may not so much seek
To be consoled, as to console;
To be understood, as to understand;
To be loved as to love.

For it is in giving that we receive;
It is in pardoning that we are pardoned;
And it is in dying that we are born to eternal life. Amen.
 
TOBaddict said:
I am really struggling with anger towards my narcissist parents. I finally stood up to them and it got ugly. They got physically violent, stole my things, destroyed our family by telling lies about me, etc. So much gaslighting and blaming ME for everything when I am the one who was wronged. I know I will never get an apology. I am so tired of forgiving them my entire life for things they aren’t even sorry for because they don’t think their actions were wrong.

But it’s not just what they do, but how they talk to me and their overall demeanor. The entitlement! Now that I am out of their mindset, I am seeing my childhood for what it truly was and it makes me so angry at all the injustices I’ve had to put with. Some memories send chills up my spine. I actually think I hate my dad- he is a bully inside and out. The thought of picking out a Father’s day card makes me want to vomit. They call themselves and I quote “excellent parents.” I am just here fuming at all they’ve done. And to top it off, my entire family hates me so I have no one- besides friends.

I guess I am having trouble forgiving because I am just exhausted from doing it. I don’t know how much more I can forgive people who think they can do whatever they want, whenever they want and can step on whoever gets in the way. They have taken so much from me. I am just hoping that if I can handle this gracefully, it will take time off of purgatory. One can pray…
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SO sorry. 😦

Just remember, like our Lord Who forgave from the Cross, we CAN PRAY for those who have hurt us, with the help of His grace.

God bless you all. †
 
†

Our Father, Who art in heaven,
Hallowed be Thy Name.
Thy Kingdom come.
Thy Will be done, on earth as it is in Heaven.

Give us this day our daily bread.
And forgive us our trespasses,
as we forgive those who trespass against us.
And lead us not into temptation,
but deliver us from evil.

Amen.

†

Hail Mary,
Full of Grace,
The Lord is with thee.
Blessed art thou among women,
and blessed is the Fruit
of thy womb, Jesus.

Holy Mary,
Mother of God,
pray for us sinners now,
and at the hour of death.

Amen.

†

Saint Michael, the archangel, defend us in battle,
be our defense against the wickedness and snares
of the devil, may God rebuke him, we humbly pray.
And do you, O’ Prince of the Heavenly host, by the
power of God thrust into Hell Satan and all the other
evil spirits who prowl about the world for the ruin of souls.

Amen.

†

St. Thérèse of Liseux Prayer From “Story of A Soul”

May today there be peace within.
May you trust God that you are exactly where you are meant to be.
May you not forget the infinite possibilities that are born of faith.
May you use those gifts that you have received,
and pass on the love that has been given to you.
May you be content knowing you are a child of God.
Let this presence settle into your bones,
and allow your soul the freedom to sing, dance, praise, and love.
It is there for each and every one of us.

Amen.

†

Lord, thank you that you are with me right now.
Your love surpasses all fear.
I give you the anxiety I feel.
I surrender all my worries to you.
Clear my mind;
Calm my heart;
Still my Spirit;
Relax my being, that, I may
always glorify you in everything
I write, speak and do.

Amen.

†

Jesus, Help Me

In every need let me come to Thee with humble trust, saying,
Jesus, help me!

In all my doubts, perplexities, and temptations,
Jesus, help me!

In hours of loneliness, weariness and trials,
Jesus, help me!

In the failure of my plans and hopes; in disappointments, troubles and sorrows,
Jesus, help me!

When my heart is cast down by failure, at seeing no good come from my efforts,
Jesus, help me!

When others fail me, and Thy grace alone can assist me,
Jesus, help me!

When I throw myself on Thy tender love as Father and Savior,
Jesus, help me!

When I feel impatient, and my cross irritates me,
Jesus, help me!

When sickness and loneliness overcome me,
Jesus, help me!

Always, in weakness, falls and shortcomings of every kind,
Jesus, help me and never forsake me.

Thank You, dear Lord Jesus.

Amen.

†

Sweet Heart of Jesus, be my love.
Sweet Heart of my Jesus, grant that I may always love You more.
Heart of Jesus, burning with love for us, set our hearts on fire with love of You.
Jesus, meek and humble of heart, make our hearts like Your Heart.

Amen.

†

Prayers said. All will be well. Do not fear, the Lord is protecting you.
Do not be lonely, your guardian angel is beside you.
Be comforted, Mother will watch over you, and the
Holy Spirit will guide you.

Amen.

†

Prayer Against Depression
………….By St Ignatius of Loyola

O Christ Jesus
When all is darkness
And we feel our weakness and helplessness,
Give us the sense of Your Presence,
Your Love and Your Strength.
Help us to have perfect trust
In Your protecting love
And strengthening power,
So that nothing may frighten or worry us,
For, living close to You,
We shall see Your Hand,
Your Purpose, Your Will through all things.

Amen.

†

Let Nothing Disturb You

Let nothing disturb you,
Let nothing frighten you,
All things are passing away:
God never changes.

Patience,
Obtains all things,
Whoever has God
Lacks nothing:
God alone suffices.

Santa Teresa de Jesús
(Santa Teresa de Ávila)

Amen.

†

**My Jesus,
I believe that You are
present in the Most Holy Sacrament.
I love You above all things, and
I desire to receive You into my soul.
**Since I cannot at this moment receive
You sacramentally, come at least spiritually
into my heart. I embrace You
as if You were already there and
unite myself wholly to You.
Never permit me to be separated
from You.

Amen.

†
**
Thank You, dear Lord Jesus.

Amen.

† **

:signofcross:

:blessyou:
 
Praying for you and your family in my nightly prayers. God bless you friend. Amen
 
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