Redemption

[AndrewJude]

Is anyone beyond redemption? Is anyone incapable of being redeemed? I know that God judges men differently than men judge men, but is everyone capable of redemption unless he chooses not to be via his actions and/or intentions within his heart? If before Hitler died he sincerely confessed all of his sins, and repented of them, after spending time in Purgatory, would he become part of the Beatific Vision?

I’m asking because I have struggled for so many years with a host of issues (low self-esteem, possibly self-hatred, etc.) and I have verbally abused my family members and friends - but mainly my family. I have blamed my family for my self loathing. I have and continue to spend time in counseling. I did not grow up in a spiritually enriching Catholic home. We were pretty much nominally Catholic. I continue to verbally abuse my family at times when my anger turns to rage. At the time, I feel justified in my reaction. Afterwards, I feel horrible, apologize (usually profusely) and feel as if I can never make it up to them and that I have scarred and damaged the relationship beyond repair. They always immediately forgive me. They tell me that they understand that I am miserable and they wish me happiness, but I can’t help thinking that I have hurt them badly. Honestly, I think most of the time because I am so self absorbed I’m more worried about punishment from God and not wanting them to hate me than their feelings. I’m very masochistic. Recently, I read two articles on from this website: www.chastitysf.com

chastitysf.com/bpd.htm
chastitysf.com/q_humility.htm

I think these two articles pretty much describe me. I must be getting some kind of pay off from acting this way (attention, pride-maybe). I want to change, but maybe I’m kidding myself, maybe that’s just something I say to make myself feel better after episodes of verbal abuse. If I really wanted to change, I would. I must enjoy beating myself up and then beating up others when I can no longer stand beating myself up. I know I’ve digressed considerably from the beginning of my post. The point is right now I feel that I am beyond redemption. I feel hopeless. I’m massively unhappy and have been for quite some time. I need God desperately, but I keep disappointing and hurting him. I welcome any and all answers and advice.

 

[thistle]

Is anyone beyond redemption? Is anyone incapable of being redeemed? I know that God judges men differently than men judge men, but is everyone capable of redemption unless he chooses not to be via his actions and/or intentions within his heart? If before Hitler died he sincerely confessed all of his sins, and repented of them, after spending time in Purgatory, would he become part of the Beatific Vision?

I’m asking because I have struggled for so many years with a host of issues (low self-esteem, possibly self-hatred, etc.) and I have verbally abused my family members and friends - but mainly my family. I have blamed my family for my self loathing. I have and continue to spend time in counseling. I did not grow up in a spiritually enriching Catholic home. We were pretty much nominally Catholic. I continue to verbally abuse my family at times when my anger turns to rage. At the time, I feel justified in my reaction. Afterwards, I feel horrible, apologize (usually profusely) and feel as if I can never make it up to them and that I have scarred and damaged the relationship beyond repair. They always immediately forgive me. They tell me that they understand that I am miserable and they wish me happiness, but I can’t help thinking that I have hurt them badly. Honestly, I think most of the time because I am so self absorbed I’m more worried about punishment from God and not wanting them to hate me than their feelings. I’m very masochistic. Recently, I read two articles on from this website: www.chastitysf.com

chastitysf.com/bpd.htm
chastitysf.com/q_humility.htm

I think these two articles pretty much describe me. I must be getting some kind of pay off from acting this way (attention, pride-maybe). I want to change, but maybe I’m kidding myself, maybe that’s just something I say to make myself feel better after episodes of verbal abuse. If I really wanted to change, I would. I must enjoy beating myself up and then beating up others when I can no longer stand beating myself up. I know I’ve digressed considerably from the beginning of my post. The point is right now I feel that I am beyond redemption. I feel hopeless. I’m massively unhappy and have been for quite some time. I need God desperately, but I keep disappointing and hurting him. I welcome any and all answers and advice.

Everyone has already been redeemed by the death of Christ on the cross.
You mean is anyone incapable of being saved? (Redemption and Salvation are different).
The answer is everyone can be saved but not everyone chooses to be saved.

 

[Sirach2]

I continue to verbally abuse my family at times when my anger turns to rage.

Sonny, I remember one time talking disrespectfully to my mother, and my dad leapt up from the table and gave me a licking. I never did it again, though it did not prevent me from thinking nasty thoughts. You may have been blessed if your folks would have taken you to task for mouthing off. I see so many kids doing that today without a shred of soap in their mouth or any discipline whatsoever.

That being said (lecture over) …

The only way you can stop your behavior is to stop your thought process which is where it all begins. Joyce Meyers has a wonderful book called “Battlefield of the Mind” that is sold just about everywhere. This is really what Jesus taught also, that to avoid murder, one must overcome anger; to avoid adultery,remove lust from the mind. Matthew 15:19

To combat uprisings against your parents, develop a sense of gratitude for the many silent gifts you have received from them. Form a litany of thanksgiving for giving you:

• Life, instead of abortion
• Food, clothing and shelter since infancy
• Education: scholastic, moral and theological
• Medical, dental, eye care when necessary
• Understanding and love, even when it was rebuffed
• The list goes on.

God is very stern about dishonoring one’s parents. They may deserve it in your way of thinking, but to demonstrate against them is surely offensive to God.

 

[Carlan]

Is anyone beyond redemption?

No No Andrew, You have acceped the Redemption Jesus made for you on the cross through God’s actual grace.
Please, understand that none of us can change ourselfves(been there done that) Only through God’s sanctifying grace can it be done.
Pray , Pray,Pray to accept the things and people in your life that you cannot change, and **continually ask God to give you the courage to change those things that you can change **in your self .Keep asking God to give you the wisdom to know that difference. Only through Him will it happen. Go often to the Sacraments, penance and Holy Communion, the Eucharist. God bless you Andrew with his grace and love and give you peace, Carlan.

 

[AndrewJude]

Thank you everyone for your advice/suggestions. They are very good! I apologize for the delay in my response. I truly appreciate all of your guidance and the time you have taken to post answers to my questions. God bless all of you. And, I will do these things you have suggested.