ZynXensar,
I understand your scruples, really I do. I went through a similar situation years ago. I had a private vow dispensed by my pastor according to Canon 1196. Please read my post and take it to heart.
First, God is not an ogre looking to “get you” on a technicality. He is a loving Father that wants what is best for you, and scruples are not what he wants for your life. The first thing you have to realize is that you have these scruples and that He wants you to have “the peace of God that passes all understanding (Phil 4:7).” Giving into scruples doesn’t lead you to that peace He desires for you.
Second, Christ gave us a Church with very real authority. What is bound on earth is bound in Heaven. Demons will chide an exorcist who tries to help a victim of demonic possession…until the exorcist gets the mandate of the Bishop, and then the demon is held bound. Why, because the Church has real authority in spiritual matters. A father can bless his children and call down the angels to watch over the home because he holds real spiritual authority in matters of the home. The same is present for a parish priest (not just any priest) over his parishioners in those matters delegated to him by the Holy See and His Ordinary. He has power over those in his parish territory that the Church recognizes in these specific matters. His authority is tied to his office, it is not dependent on his orthodoxy or his private morality. It is truly there for the benefit of souls, and God honors that. When your PP exercises this authority, you do not have to second guess it. He is there as God’s chosen representative just as he is there as your confessor. His actions are held bound in Heaven. So when he dispenses you from the private vow, you are truly dispensed. Don’t fool yourself into thinking otherwise. He is not forcing God’s hand. Rather, God is giving you absolute assurance.
Finally, I would recommend that you not take any other private vows. It is murder for a person who suffers scruples. People often make these “promises” to God impulsively, and then it troubles them. A common remedy is to agree with your PP/confessor that he binds you to consult with him prior to accepting any future vow, and that all private vows are null and void unless he is first consulted. This makes any rash promises or vows made in haste not trouble your conscience. He has used his authority to prevent God from holding you bound to that promise.
I hope this helps.
