Rejected by a woman for pursuing Catholicism

[CaliLobo]

So my fear was realized. The other day a Protestant woman rejected me for pursuing Catholicism. (But I put Catholic on profile!) She’s a staffer in the ministry so I knew I was toast. Funny, when I said 2 Timothy mentions the OT at best, she quickly said no. How deeply people believe the illogical!

I fear if this pattern continues though my days pursuing Catholicism might be numbered. I want to be married and have no calling to priesthood.

 

[1ke]

So my fear was realized. The other day a Protestant woman rejected me for pursuing Catholicism. (But I put Catholic on profile!) She’s a staffer in the ministry so I knew I was toast. Funny, when I said 2 Timothy mentions the OT at best, she quickly said no. How deeply people believe the illogical!

How lucky you found out so quickly and didn’t waste time with her.

I fear if this pattern continues though my days pursuing Catholicism might be numbered. I want to be married and have no calling to priesthood.

Seems perhaps your interest in Catholicism is pretty shallow at this point if that is the case.

Do you want to just be married or do you want to be married to a person who shares your beliefs, values, and vision for marriage and family?

If Catholicism is true (and why else would you want to be Catholic??) then how can you say you will leave?

Don’t focus on your preconceived notions about your future. And perhaps focusing on RCIA right now would be best, and girls later. Catholic girls, practicing ones.

 

[ClearWater]

So my fear was realized. The other day a Protestant woman rejected me for pursuing Catholicism. (But I put Catholic on profile!) She’s a staffer in the ministry so I knew I was toast. Funny, when I said 2 Timothy mentions the OT at best, she quickly said no. How deeply people believe the illogical!

I fear if this pattern continues though my days pursuing Catholicism might be numbered. I want to be married and have no calling to priesthood.

That, or find a Catholic girl.

 

[Dorothy]

So my fear was realized. The other day a Protestant woman rejected me for pursuing Catholicism. (But I put Catholic on profile!) She’s a staffer in the ministry so I knew I was toast. Funny, when I said 2 Timothy mentions the OT at best, she quickly said no. How deeply people believe the illogical!

I fear if this pattern continues though my days pursuing Catholicism might be numbered. I want to be married and have no calling to priesthood.

This is why Jesus said “I have come to bring a sword, not peace.” Many times this rudeness happens in our own families. We need to love and pray for our enemies, and stay close to the Lord in prayer.

He needs to be first in everything. He doesn’t mean we should retaliate with malice towards those who rudely disagree with us, and if we truly love the Lord we will not allow others to influence us away from Him. We can let Jesus be our patience and discernment about what to say and/or do when others oppose us.

Pray and draw closer to the Lord who loves you greatly!

 

[smichhertz]

So my fear was realized. The other day a Protestant woman rejected me for pursuing Catholicism. (But I put Catholic on profile!) She’s a staffer in the ministry so I knew I was toast. Funny, when I said 2 Timothy mentions the OT at best, she quickly said no. How deeply people believe the illogical!

I fear if this pattern continues though my days pursuing Catholicism might be numbered. I want to be married and have no calling to priesthood.

Hi CaliLobo,

If you believed in pagan spirituality you’d have the exact same problem. Certain beliefs just don’t mix well with each other. That’s nothing unique to Catholicism.

I’d suggest taking some time for some vocational discernment. And maybe restrict dating to committed Catholic girls only. There’s lots of Catholic dating sites, and there’s also usually various Catholic social groups and ways to meet single committed Catholic women.

I think you’ll find more happiness that way. Remember that part of the joy of marriage is waiting to let it happen in God’s time. Don’t force it on your own terms. A little patience goes a long way.

Hope that helps!

 

[PennyinCanada]

So my fear was realized. The other day a Protestant woman rejected me for pursuing Catholicism. (But I put Catholic on profile!) She’s a staffer in the ministry so I knew I was toast. Funny, when I said 2 Timothy mentions the OT at best, she quickly said no. How deeply people believe the illogical!

I fear if this pattern continues though my days pursuing Catholicism might be numbered. I want to be married and have no calling to priesthood.

Why is that a fear? When you are dating, you are looking for someone who is a compatible life partner and better to find that out sooner than later. Say Praise God! Thank you Jesus!

The whole point of dating is to narrow it down, to one person. Looking for a Catholic young lady means you are saving yourself a lot of time, only looking at the wheat and by passing the weeds. Rejoice and be glad! God is in our midst! Tell Him you mean business and that you are firm in standing on the Rock and will not consider dating a person who is not Catholic. You stand on the rock of Peter and are not a reed waving this way and that as the wind blows. You want your house to be built on rock so when the wind and rain come, as they do to everyone, your house will remain standing. Pray for your life partner daily that she remain in grace and make good decisions, and those graces for you as well.

 

[livingwordunity]

I met my wife on this website: Catholic Match.

And we just celebrated our 11th wedding anniversary.

I recommend this website only if you are serious about being a Catholic.

 

[underacloud]

You cannot escape such problems.

If you were protestant, you could be writing “Rejected by a woman for pursuing Protestantism”.

If you were a lukewarm Christian of any sort, you could be writing “Rejected by a woman for lacking a strong faith”.

If you were agnostic or atheist, you could be writing “Rejected by a woman for not believing in God”.

The point being, whatever you believe, there will be women who find that belief incompatible with their own, and there will be women who will find it an important common basis for any potential relationship.

 

[Hodegetria]

I don’t think you lost much by that “rejection”. Remember the beatitudes.

I’ve heard this advice regarding finding a marriage partner from many evangelical groups: Start praying now for your future spouse: that she be chaste, safe, at peace, following God’s will, etc. and cultivate those qualities in yourself. You should be equally yoked.

God bless you. I will pray for you and your bride-to-be.

 

[CaliLobo]

How lucky you found out so quickly and didn’t waste time with her.

Seems perhaps your interest in Catholicism is pretty shallow at this point if that is the case.

Do you want to just be married or do you want to be married to a person who shares your beliefs, values, and vision for marriage and family?

If Catholicism is true (and why else would you want to be Catholic??) then how can you say you will leave?

Don’t focus on your preconceived notions about your future. And perhaps focusing on RCIA right now would be best, and girls later. Catholic girls, practicing ones.

I’ve heard others on CAF say on my earlier thread that it has been harder for them to date since they got stronger with their faith.

And I meet many more Protestants than Catholics.

Must not freak out…

 

[EasterJoy]

I’ve heard others on CAF say on my earlier thread that it has been harder for them to date since they got stronger with their faith.

And I meet many more Protestants than Catholics.

Must not freak out…

Exactly. You must not freak out. Pursue the truth, and take what it brings.

“For whoever wishes to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will save it. What profit is there for one to gain the whole world yet lose or forfeit himself?” Luke 9:24-25

and

*“No one who sets a hand to the plow and looks to what was left behind is fit for the kingdom of God.” *Luke 9:62

Any true intention to follow the Lord is going to ask for sacrifices. If you “have” something you’re not willing to sacrifice in order to follow, well, count the cost:

*"If any one comes to me without hating his father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters, and even his own life, he cannot be my disciple.Whoever does not carry his own cross and come after me cannot be my disciple.

Which of you wishing to construct a tower does not first sit down and calculate the cost to see if there is enough for its completion? Otherwise, after laying the foundation and finding himself unable to finish the work the onlookers should laugh at him and say, ‘This one began to build but did not have the resources to finish.’ Or what king marching into battle would not first sit down and decide whether with ten thousand troops he can successfully oppose another king advancing upon him with twenty thousand troops? But if not, while he is still far away, he will send a delegation to ask for peace terms.

In the same way, everyone of you who does not renounce all his possessions cannot be my disciple. “Salt is good, but if salt itself loses its taste, with what can its flavor be restored? It is fit neither for the soil nor for the manure pile; it is thrown out. Whoever has ears to hear ought to hear.” *
Luke 14-26-35

 

[underacloud]

I’ve heard others on CAF say on my earlier thread that it has been harder for them to date since they got stronger with their faith.

But…couples who share a strong faith (any faith, but shared) have a much lower divorce rate on average. If you wish to marry, and for that marriage to be successful, then finding someone who shares your faith, and you are both strong in it, is a good bet.

The question is which faith. That question best precedes the issue of marriage. Work out your faith, then you’ll be better placed to find someone to share it with.

 

[ThyKingdomCome]

Well, I guess I’m confused why a Catholic or future Catholic wouldn’t be more interested in finding relationships with other Catholics anyway. Dating is for the purpose of marriage, and I’m imagining that this Protestant woman recognizes that dating someone whose beliefs are very different from hers is probably a bad idea, since it could lead to falling in love, and then to marriage to a person with vastly different beliefs. I would encourage you to think about this from your perspective as well. Someday, God willing, you will be a married Catholic man. Do you really want the mother of your children to be teaching your kids beliefs that aren’t the same as yours? It may sting to be rejected, but keep in mind that you are most likely better off NOT dating this person either, since you clearly have incompatible beliefs. Perhaps you can consider this a favor that she did for you, so that you can be free to look for a woman who shares your faith.

 

[HerCrazierHalf]

You cannot escape such problems.

If you were protestant, you could be writing “Rejected by a woman for pursuing Protestantism”.

If you were a lukewarm Christian of any sort, you could be writing “Rejected by a woman for lacking a strong faith”.

If you were agnostic or atheist, you could be writing “Rejected by a woman for not believing in God”.

The point being, whatever you believe, there will be women who find that belief incompatible with their own, and there will be women who will find it an important common basis for any potential relationship.

Pretty much this.

A shared faith is vital for some and not others. Certain faiths are deal breaker for different people.

This just means that you are free to find a Catholic woman or possibly a woman who does not view the differing faiths as a deal breaker.

 

[EasterJoy]

But…couples who share a strong faith (any faith, but shared) have a much lower divorce rate on average. If you wish to marry, and for that marriage to be successful, then finding someone who shares your faith, and you are both strong in it, is a good bet.

The question is which faith. That question best precedes the issue of marriage. Work out your faith, then you’ll be better placed to find someone to share it with.

When you know what you believe is true, when you have the integrity to always stick with what you have come to believe is true, then you’ll have the foundation to choose and be chosen for a lifelong marriage.

*What! a speaker is but a prater; a rhyme is but a ballad. A good leg will fall; a straight back will stoop; a black beard will turn white; a curled pate will grow bald; a fair face will wither; a full eye will wax hollow: but a good heart, Kate, is the sun and the moon; or, rather, the sun, and not the moon; for it shines bright and never changes, but keeps his course truly. * Henry V, Act V, Scene 2

 

[SuperLuigi]

So my fear was realized. The other day a Protestant woman rejected me for pursuing Catholicism. (But I put Catholic on profile!) She’s a staffer in the ministry so I knew I was toast. Funny, when I said 2 Timothy mentions the OT at best, she quickly said no. How deeply people believe the illogical!

Well, all I can say is things like that happen. I once had a woman ask me “Um, can you read?”

My response was that not only could I read, but that I can also do this thing called publishing, and I then pointed out the error on profile which led me to believe she could be interested in me. She then fixed the error and I never heard from her again!

I fear if this pattern continues though my days pursuing Catholicism might be numbered. I want to be married and have no calling to priesthood.

Whoa! Slow down, there Tex!

You shouldn’t be changing who are you like that because you think you’ll increase your chances in the dating game.

It’s important to have an identity, and pursing Catholicism counts, my friend!

Hang in there!

 

[SuperLuigi]

I’ve heard others on CAF say on my earlier thread

that it has been harder for them to date since they got stronger with their faith.

Well, they are not you. And some guys almost seem to their their holiness will get them a date all by itself. :nope: :dts:

Got to communicate romantically or forget the whole deal. :yup:

And I meet many more Protestants than Catholics.

 

[schaeffer]

Since you are in the dating world, I think it is VERY important that you understand the difference between rejection and compatibility.

Not pursuing a relationship with a person with whom you are not ultimately compatible is NOT rejection. It’s honesty and maturity.

It doesn’t mean she thinks you are bad, undatable or unworthy of a relationship. It means she understands that ultimately she wants to be with a man whom she shares a faith with.

We are not compatible with everyone, especially when it comes to a lifetime commitment. That doesn’t mean that we feel most people in the world are bad, wrong or rejects. It means we recognize the importance of shared dreams, goals and commitments.

 

[manualman]

I’m tempted to also say “good riddance then,” but I can all too well remember being in those shoes and wondering where the heck I would meet somebody.

In the moment, it feels like mission impossible. But in hindsight, it will be no big deal.

Don’t Panic and keep your towel handy! (Anybody get that joke anymore?)

 

[CaliLobo]

Since you are in the dating world, I think it is VERY important that you understand the difference between rejection and compatibility.

Not pursuing a relationship with a person with whom you are not ultimately compatible is NOT rejection. It’s honesty and maturity.

It doesn’t mean she thinks you are bad, undatable or unworthy of a relationship. It means she understands that ultimately she wants to be with a man whom she shares a faith with.

We are not compatible with everyone, especially when it comes to a lifetime commitment. That doesn’t mean that we feel most people in the world are bad, wrong or rejects. It means we recognize the importance of shared dreams, goals and commitments.

I know. But I’m still at step one so it doesn’t make me feel better. I’m just afraid of lack of women to meet. And the idea that I only need one doesn’t mean I’ll connect with the next woman I meet.