Religious education director at parish morally incorrect

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My mom was looking at religious ed classes for my younger sister and brother. Because the times at our local parish didn’t work she looked at another parish. The director of the Religious Ed at said parish said and my 4th grade sister heard her say she was pro choice and personally thought that women needed to become priests, and that pope Benedict was old and she didn’t like him, but the new pope would modernize the Church. This was to a confirmation class while she waited for her class to start!? I was in restroom. She won Religious Eduction director of the year at the dioceses I’m from. :confused: I emailed the director of religious formation and education. Told by him that the diocese doesn’t check, and priests nominate directors. I got a canned phone call asking what exactly took place told him what my sister said. I’m fuming mad that she has young people in her care and the priest nominated her for her award. I talked to him, and he seemed very progressive and didn’t actively listen to my concerns. They go to parochial school and at least the teachers do a great job so no religious Ed is necessary!
 
You called angry because of something your 4th grade sister overheard?

Honestly, I don’t blame them for not taking you seriously. This is a prime example of hearsay, and spreading it could unjustly damage this woman’s reputation. They know the educator, they’ve worked with her, they trust her, and they should not remove her because of what you say your sister told you about what she overheard.

The more appropriate course of action would have been to have your mom gently pull this woman aside and say “I’m sorry for the intrusion, but it seems that my daughter has the idea that you believe XYZ. I’m sure this is a misunderstanding, but I just wanted to clarify”.
 
BlueEyedLady said:
You called angry because of something your 4th grade sister overheard?

Honestly, I don’t blame them for not taking you seriously. This is a prime example of hearsay, and spreading it could unjustly damage this woman’s reputation. They know the educator, they’ve worked with her, they trust her, and they should not remove her because of what you say your sister told you about what she overheard.

The more appropriate course of action would have been to have your mom gently pull this woman aside and say “I’m sorry for the intrusion, but it seems that my daughter has the idea that you believe XYZ. I’m sure this is a misunderstanding, but I just wanted to clarify”.
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It was overheard, but it is extremely serious. Yes, the right thing is for an adult to talk to the person in question directly about the allegations.

Having said that, the conversion with the priest was first-hand. If his comments were contrary to Church teaching or seemed unconcerned with such being taught on his watch by someone with some popularity, the vicar of clergy for the diocese ought to be told about the conversation. I do NOT mean to expect or ask for some action against the priest. I mean to simply say, “I thought this might concern you and you might want to know; I do not mean you need to reply to me or that ’ something needs to be done ’ to satisfy me.” I mean to say that voices of concern add up. This is how a bishop knows whether one of his priests has an occasional misunderstanding and whether some incident or other is isolated.
 
Since Pope Benedict left the Chair of Peter over a year ago, the thing to do is to let this drop and let go of the outrage. The time has passed for any action, because the comment is old. It is high time to let go of the matter. If it haunts you, pray for the directors off religious education, pray for priests, and give thanks for the faith and all those who hold to it with charity and rejoicing in the face of all ridicule. I think you will find the devil will lose his taste for tormenting with this bitter matter, if you make good and faithful use of those times he throws it at you. (Acts of thanksgiving and praise of God particularly have that effect.)
 
It was recently she is still hung up on pope Benedict my sister wouldn’t lie and I was serious in asking her about what she heard. She wouldn’t make it up! I’m not about spreading rumors, but worry about the young people in the class. I found out from another source who has a YA in the class and the YA came concerned, because she had said this and the sophomore was uncomfortable! My mom called the faith formation office again and sent them an email quoting the parent in the email as further proof. They were more worried, but parishes hire their religious education directors and it’s up to the priest. He couldn’t do anything now, but would for future awards he would try to verify.
 
As was said above, speak to the DRE in question directly. BE CHARITABLE. If speaking to the DRE doesn’t work, then speak to the pastor of the parish. Again, BE CHARITABLE. If speaking to the pastor doesn’t work, then, and only then, should the diocese be called. Did I say BE CHARITABLE?
 
EasterJoy said:
It was overheard, but it is extremely serious. Yes, the right thing is for an adult to talk to the person in question directly about the allegations.

Having said that, the conversion with the priest was first-hand. If his comments were contrary to Church teaching or seemed unconcerned with such being taught on his watch by someone with some popularity, the vicar of clergy for the diocese ought to be told about the conversation. I do NOT mean to expect or ask for some action against the priest. I mean to simply say, “I thought this might concern you and you might want to know; I do not mean you need to reply to me or that ’ something needs to be done ’ to satisfy me.” I mean to say that voices of concern add up. This is how a bishop knows whether one of his priests has an occasional misunderstanding and whether some incident or other is isolated.
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I guess I would be unconcerned. The OP isn’t even a parent, and we don’t even know if she’s an adult. So if someone came into my office reporting something that their 10 year old sister claims to have overheard someone say, and I had worked with that someone long enough to know it isn’t the case, then I’m not going to lend a lot of credence to the hearsay of kids.

Now, if the mother had approached the woman and was unsatisfied with the answer, then yes, the mother should have approached the priest.
 
I’m 22 and have a rich catholic background I commute to college and was driving my sister as a favor. I appended my last post to say another credible witness came forth with a sophomore in the program who became uncomfortable with the discussion and was too scared to speak up! I just asked for advice. I talked to the priest with my mom he didn’t seem like he cared what she taught he said dissent can be good. As with questioning Church’s beliefs. To become more like Christ.
 
From my own experiences, I plan to teach my children about the faith and not put it into other people’s hands. You just don’t know what anyone believes about anything.
 
mfdc said:
I’m 22 and have a rich catholic background I commute to college and was driving my sister as a favor. I appended my last post to say another credible witness came forth with a sophomore in the program who became uncomfortable with the discussion and was too scared to speak up! I just asked for advice. I talked to the priest with my mom he didn’t seem like he cared what she taught he said dissent can be good. As with questioning Church’s beliefs. To become more like Christ.
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Yes, the vicar of clergy wants to hear about this kind of answer, although the chances no one has said anything are somewhat remote. Do mention that you are 22 and found the remark scandalous, but didn’t think that the priest himself would have welcomed your dissent to his willingness to make himself a greater authority than the Pope (or whatever reason you had for not taking him to task yourself). You may mention that you have friends who also feel uncomfortable speaking up. Sign off with your respect for him and your confidence that whatever he sees fit to do with your comment is fine, and no reply is necessary.

Why does he care? Because a) priests who feel self- congratulatory about ignoring the Pope will not refrain from treating their bishop the same b) it is nice to be able to tell such priests that silence cannot be taken as agreement and c ) a pastor who teaches others to ignore authority lightly will have little authority themselves.
 
BlueEyedLady said:
You called angry because of something your 4th grade sister overheard?

Honestly, I don’t blame them for not taking you seriously. This is a prime example of hearsay, and spreading it could unjustly damage this woman’s reputation. They know the educator, they’ve worked with her, they trust her, and they should not remove her because of what you say your sister told you about what she overheard.

The more appropriate course of action would have been to have your mom gently pull this woman aside and say “I’m sorry for the intrusion, but it seems that my daughter has the idea that you believe XYZ. I’m sure this is a misunderstanding, but I just wanted to clarify”.
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You are wrong. Why should she view her sister as not understanding what she heard? I would be angry too. But then I have seen and heard this before. More than one DRE I know of is for women being priests, birth control, speak out against the Pope and similar comments to that of the OP. I went the route of asking the pastor to address this and nothing was done.

If the Church is going to preach one way and act another I don’t see how she expects to be believable. This woman should not be a DRE if she is speaks or teaches contrary to the teachings of the Church. The Pastor needs to do his job and investigate this allegation. If he will not then the Archdiocese should. Heaven knows they have fired people for less than this.
 
BlueEyedLady said:
I guess I would be unconcerned. The OP isn’t even a parent, and we don’t even know if she’s an adult. So if someone came into my office reporting something that their 10 year old sister claims to have overheard someone say, and I had worked with that someone long enough to know it isn’t the case, then I’m not going to lend a lot of credence to the hearsay of kids.

Now, if the mother had approached the woman and was unsatisfied with the answer, then yes, the mother should have approached the priest.
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When I teach, I like to have a heads-up about what sorts of scandalous reports are going around about my teaching, so I can clarify and correct that which is an error. Concerns about content ought to get back to the teacher, but yes, with the charitable assumption that someone took her wrong. That is an important point!
 
I agree with both perspectives offered in this thread:

a) Yes, it is a (potentially) serious issue.

b) It is not the OP’s place to get involved, and potentially spread unreliable heersay. (everyone thinks that what they hear from their sister, wife, mother, father, etc and pass on to others is not heersay, but I’m afriad that’s exactly what it is).

So, I would leave it up to the mother to pursue this matter. Firstly to clarify whether what the daughter has said is true, and secondly to bring any valid concerns to the attention of appropriate people, escalating it up the chain as relevant.
 
mfdc said:
I’m 22 and have a rich catholic background I commute to college and was driving my sister as a favor. I appended my last post to say another credible witness came forth with a sophomore in the program who became uncomfortable with the discussion and was too scared to speak up! I just asked for advice. I talked to the priest with my mom he didn’t seem like he cared what she taught he said dissent can be good. As with questioning Church’s beliefs. To become more like Christ.
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In that case it is useless. Take your sister out of the class and do home school religious ed.

What diocease is this?

Linus2nd
 
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Sincerely, I have found so many religious teachers in the US teaching plain wrong ideas that at this point I don’t trust any religious teacher. I am not surprised one bit and it would not be the first case I know of a religious teacher teaching pro choice ideas etc. If the priest doesn’t do anything ( which I also have seen it happening in similar cases) I agree with Linus. Take your sister out and home school religious end. When my daughter used to go to CCD I used to sit with her and go every each single thing she was told just to correct whatever she was told wrongly. Basically i had to re teach a ccd clasd ay home. unfortunately, many times that is all you can do as there are so many teachers doing that, so many people that dont care and so many parents that learned incorrect teachings, that one simple person complaining won’t do too much. You have to be e tremely careful with what kids learn from religious teachers.
 
‘Charitable’ has become some sort of trigger word with Catholics. It’s like calling someone who disagrees with you a ‘hater’. Pointing out error is charitable just like when Jesus told the adulteress women not to sin anymore.
 
mfdc said:
My mom was looking at religious ed classes for my younger sister and brother. Because the times at our local parish didn’t work she looked at another parish. The director of the Religious Ed at said parish said and my 4th grade sister heard her say she was pro choice and personally thought that women needed to become priests, and that pope Benedict was old and she didn’t like him, but the new pope would modernize the Church. This was to a confirmation class while she waited for her class to start!? I was in restroom. She won Religious Eduction director of the year at the dioceses I’m from. :confused: I emailed the director of religious formation and education. Told by him that the diocese doesn’t check, and priests nominate directors. I got a canned phone call asking what exactly took place told him what my sister said. I’m fuming mad that she has young people in her care and the priest nominated her for her award. I talked to him, and he seemed very progressive and didn’t actively listen to my concerns. They go to parochial school and at least the teachers do a great job so no religious Ed is necessary!
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O.K. O.K. lets be charitable…I read the thread and doesn’t seem like you are being taken seriously…I believe you and I believe yr 10 yr old…I do trust children…and a ten yr old has reached the age of reason…tks to St. Pius X that’s why children younger than that can receive the Eucharist. my 6th grade daughter came home from her school…Catholic school…and over dinner…at the table…while eating/'sharing, after the Blessing,shared that her math teacher said that we worshiped statues…I got on the phone and called the Pastor and the next day that teacher had to leave emergently to care for a sick aunt in KS…I was paying for my 4 children to receive an education but also in a Catholic setting…Catechism also…the following year we got a new principle…nice lady…had the students doing tai chi which I have no immediate problem with…but some other new wave stuff billed as meditative, I believe the flyer said…my suggestion to the school…they want to do something spirtual/meditative…why not the Holy Rosary…the next week the new wavy stuff ended and the Rosary was prayed every afternoon in the place of the stuff in the school yard…my money went to that very good Catholic school for my children to be ecucated and to learn in a Catholic setting…if you get no relief after speaking with the Pastor (Charitably),and he doesn’t seem concerned…and you speak with this teacher teaching RCIA (I believe) and she confirms her stand…then perhaps the Bishop…then the Nuncio,then whatever…congrats to yr 10 y/o sister…sounds like she’s getting what she needs at home…PAX
 
marymary1975 said:
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Sincerely, I have found so many religious teachers in the US teaching plain wrong ideas that at this point I don’t trust any religious teacher. I am not surprised one bit and it would not be the first case I know of a religious teacher teaching pro choice ideas etc. If the priest doesn’t do anything ( which I also have seen it happening in similar cases) I agree with Linus. Take your sister out and home school religious end. When my daughter used to go to CCD I used to sit with her and go every each single thing she was told just to correct whatever she was told wrongly. Basically i had to re teach a ccd clasd ay home. unfortunately, many times that is all you can do as there are so many teachers doing that, so many people that dont care and so many parents that learned incorrect teachings, that one simple person complaining won’t do too much. You have to be e tremely careful with what kids learn from religious teachers.
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I would be anxious to talk to the teacher and see if this is her approach to teaching the children. They are very impressionable. If she is teaching against what the church teaches, then go as high as you have to go to get it stopped, but talk to her first. Make sure you tell your sister the real story of respecting all life and staying true to the church. I’m sad to hear this and I think we need to pray for all the clergy and the CCD teachers and students…
 
I believe the 10 year old is telling the truth. However, I don’t know what it is like in the states, but in Canada, ‘equal rights’ are so strong, one can NOT fire someone for making a statement such as ‘Abortion is OK’

When my mom first starting teaching, (in the 1940’s), the teacher had to have a good reputation. Which meant as a single woman, my mom had to board with a family. She was not allowed to have her own apartment because rumors could get started.

Now society has gone the other way. There was a case of a woman who worked for a Christian organization and she decided to go public and tell society she was homosexual and lived with her girlfriend. The organization fired her and were fined terribly since that goes against human rights

All this to say, perhaps the priest is concerned about the comments but he knows legally he can not do a thing about it.

Just a possible scenario

Angie
 
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