Religious Habit for Lay Person

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GrahamAPhone

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Soooo…
I have been wanting to do like a few day (maybe a week) of like constant meditation on my vocation, though I am VERY easily distracted. Is it possible for me to like take on a religious habit as a reminder of what I am doing, as well as like a reminder for me to live a Christian life. You know?
I know I ask weird questions
 
The habit is a tricky question. If you ask some religious they will tell you that it is not necessary and that it was the garment worn at a particular time in history, but it does not really add or take away from the religious life.

If you ask others, such as me, we believe that the habit reminds us of who we are. My grey tunic reminds me that I’m a Franciscan and that everything I do and say during the course of a day must be consistent with the rule of St. Francis, his vision of the Gospel, his vision of the Church and the world, his vision of brotherhood and his desire to love Christ crucified above all things, people and places. It reminds me of my special place in the Church and of the fact that I must be brother to all men as Christ was the first-born of many brothers and sisters. It also serves to remind me that I belong to Christ, not to me. That I am but a number in a larger family of brothers and sisters who follow Christ in the manner of St. Francis of Assisi.

The habit is a sign of my covenant with Christ, as the wedding band is a sign of the covenant between husband and wife.

All this being said, the habit does not make me holier. The habit itself it holy, because it is a sacramental. But it reminds me that I am not holy, but I must become holy, because I was called to holiness as are all men and women.

I can’t see how wearing a habit is going to help you discern your vocation. Generally, the habit is taken on when you have discerned a call from Christ to live in a particular manner. You put on the habit to keep you focussed, to remind you that you must remain on track. Christ has called and you have responded. The habit reminds you of this mystery that no one can explain.

But if one has not yet responded to Christ’s call to live in a particular manner: Franciscan, Carmelite, Dominican, Augustinian, etc, it would seem a futile act to wear one.

In addition, not all religious wear habits. Some communities never had one, but they are not less consecrated than those who have one. I’m reminded of Mother Teresa’s religious brothers, the Missionaries of Charity. This congregation has never had a habit. Mother Teresa did not want them to have a habit. The priests of the Missionaries of Charity, another of congregation of the same religious family have never had a habit. She didn’t want them to have one either. Yet, both groups are truly and canonically male religious. Let’s assume that Christ is calling you to be a Missionary of Charity and you’re a man or a Marianist Brother (who have never had a habit), wearing a Carmelite habit is not going to be of much help. It may, in fact, get in the way of discerning a vocation to their way of life when in fact Christ may be calling you there.

I don’t see how wearing a habit is going to help in the discernment process. I would suggest that you try to live the charism of the community to which you are attracted and see if it fits you. Rather than wearing the habit.

Fraternally,

Br. JR, OSF 🙂
 
JReducation said:
The habit is a tricky question. If you ask some religious they will tell you that it is not necessary and that it was the garment worn at a particular time in history, but it does not really add or take away from the religious life.

If you ask others, such as me, we believe that the habit reminds us of who we are. My grey tunic reminds me that I’m a Franciscan and that everything I do and say during the course of a day must be consistent with the rule of St. Francis, his vision of the Gospel, his vision of the Church and the world, his vision of brotherhood and his desire to love Christ crucified above all things, people and places. It reminds me of my special place in the Church and of the fact that I must be brother to all men as Christ was the first-born of many brothers and sisters. It also serves to remind me that I belong to Christ, not to me. That I am but a number in a larger family of brothers and sisters who follow Christ in the manner of St. Francis of Assisi.

The habit is a sign of my covenant with Christ, as the wedding band is a sign of the covenant between husband and wife.

All this being said, the habit does not make me holier. The habit itself it holy, because it is a sacramental. But it reminds me that I am not holy, but I must become holy, because I was called to holiness as are all men and women.

I can’t see how wearing a habit is going to help you discern your vocation. Generally, the habit is taken on when you have discerned a call from Christ to live in a particular manner. You put on the habit to keep you focussed, to remind you that you must remain on track. Christ has called and you have responded. The habit reminds you of this mystery that no one can explain.

But if one has not yet responded to Christ’s call to live in a particular manner: Franciscan, Carmelite, Dominican, Augustinian, etc, it would seem a futile act to wear one.

In addition, not all religious wear habits. Some communities never had one, but they are not less consecrated than those who have one. I’m reminded of Mother Teresa’s religious brothers, the Missionaries of Charity. This congregation has never had a habit. Mother Teresa did not want them to have a habit. The priests of the Missionaries of Charity, another of congregation of the same religious family have never had a habit. She didn’t want them to have one either. Yet, both groups are truly and canonically male religious. Let’s assume that Christ is calling you to be a Missionary of Charity and you’re a man or a Marianist Brother (who have never had a habit), wearing a Carmelite habit is not going to be of much help. It may, in fact, get in the way of discerning a vocation to their way of life when in fact Christ may be calling you there.

I don’t see how wearing a habit is going to help in the discernment process. I would suggest that you try to live the charism of the community to which you are attracted and see if it fits you. Rather than wearing the habit.

Fraternally,

Br. JR, OSF 🙂
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I dont think that it will help me to descern (I know it wont) but I want it as a reminder of what I stand for, and a reminder to pray,
“My grey tunic reminds me that I’m a Franciscan and that everything I do and say during the course of a day must be consistent with the rule of St. Francis”

Like what you said ^ above

thanks for your reply
 
Speak with your spiritual director about this.

What I would do is to dress simply. No bright flashy colors, nothing to call attention to yourself. But you do not want to dress so drab that you call attention to yourself either.
 
ByzCath said:
Speak with your spiritual director about this.

What I would do is to dress simply. No bright flashy colors, nothing to call attention to yourself. But you do not want to dress so drab that you call attention to yourself either.
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Thank you
I dress simply normally.
lol
should I dress flashier? 😛
 
GrahamAPhone said:
Thank you
I dress simply normally.
lol
should I dress flashier? 😛
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NOOOOOOOOO

Keep it simple. Just don’t look like a slob, unless you’re a Franciscan. Then it’s OK. LOL

Look like a Caremelite. :eek:

Fraternally,

Br. JR, OSF
 
I feel very strongly about habits. I like what the brother said-that when he is wearing his gray habit it reminds him of who he is and what he stands for. I agree totally! I think that if you think some kind of habit may help you, you could try wearing something special which reminds you and helps you focus on what you are working toward: perhaps a special scarf which could substitute for a veil, or a button, pin, bracelet, scapular. You could dress in all brown (franciscan colors) or in all black and get an iron-on patch that symbolizes your discernment. Wear a cincture rope for a belt. Wear a stole around your neck. There are all kinds of things you can do…ask the Holy Spirit for guidance and be creative!👍
 
Personally, I think the most appropriate habit for a lay person is lay clothing with maybe a chastity ring or something equally inconspicuous. The habit is reserved to those who have the right to wear it and a lay person doesn’t have this right/obligation. The habit indicates who you are, and certainly if you’re not in public vows or in formation for vows, you should not be wearing in public or in private the attire of those who are in the consecrated state. If you want something to remind you of discerning consecrated life, you might want to consider wearing a scapular (which is a downsized “habit” for the laity and non-religious clerics).
 
SerraSemper said:
Personally, I think the most appropriate habit for a lay person is lay clothing with maybe a chastity ring or something equally inconspicuous. The habit is reserved to those who have the right to wear it and a lay person doesn’t have this right/obligation. **The habit indicates who you are, and certainly if you’re not in public vows or in formation for vows, you should not be wearing in public or in private the attire of those who are in the consecrated state. ** If you want something to remind you of discerning consecrated life, you might want to consider wearing a scapular (which is a downsized “habit” for the laity and non-religious clerics).
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I got lost on this sentence. But just for everyone’s clarification let me explain the use of the habit or those that usually wear a habit:
  1. religious men or women in vows
  2. novices
  3. postulants
  4. secular orders (if they have one)
  5. societies of apostolic life (if they have one)
Religious in vows are not the only people who wear a habit. The habit identifies you with a particular way of life. It is very difficult to say that this or that is an appropriate habit for a lay person in the pew, because the average lay person is not part of a religious family. The exception ot that are members of secular orders. They are part of a religious family and have the canonical right to wear the habit of that religious family. It’s rarely done today, but it’s still in the rules and constitutions of religiosu families. Some wear it during community fucntions. The only secular order that I know that wears it all the time are the Secular Franciscans of the Immaculate. There may be others, but I don’t know.

Fraternally,

Br. JR, OSF 🙂
 
my order (Benedictine oblate) does not have habits for lay members, I don’t think you can adopt a habit recognizable as belonging to a specific religious order without their permission, as it is a gift from them to the novice, and denotes something specific, taking the vows or promises of that order, after formation they direct. It is much more than the reminder.

the “habit” for lay people has always been recognized as the brown scapular, linked in post above, since that is its derivation and purpose, a means for laity to join with the vowed religious and to wear a modified form of their habit, for the purpose OP suggests, better recollection in the spiritual exercises.

that is not to say you could not also adopt a plain modest form of dress for daily life which better puts you “in uniform” for your current mode of life. ie discernment.
 
JReducation said:
I got lost on this sentence. But just for everyone’s clarification let me explain the use of the habit or those that usually wear a habit:
  1. religious men or women in vows
  2. novices
  3. postulants
  4. secular orders (if they have one)
  5. societies of apostolic life (if they have one)
Religious in vows are not the only people who wear a habit. The habit identifies you with a particular way of life. It is very difficult to say that this or that is an appropriate habit for a lay person in the pew, because the average lay person is not part of a religious family. The exception ot that are members of secular orders. They are part of a religious family and have the canonical right to wear the habit of that religious family. It’s rarely done today, but it’s still in the rules and constitutions of religiosu families. Some wear it during community fucntions. The only secular order that I know that wears it all the time are the Secular Franciscans of the Immaculate. There may be others, but I don’t know.

Fraternally,

Br. JR, OSF 🙂
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The lay third orders also have a form of a habit. The Third Order Carmelites (T.O. Carm.) and the Secular Discalced Carmelites (O.C.D.S.) wear an enlarged brown scapular but they are usually restricted to only wear this at their meetings and gatherings. This is because as lay people they do not want to call undue attention to themselves due to the scapular. Many also chose to dress in a simple manner.
 
Thanks everyone,
I bet it sounds silly, but you know how some of the habits have those like belt things with the knots on the end, I started wearing one of those.
It helps me remember to pray, and to act like I should, and It holds up my pants
lol
 
janessa1850 said:
I feel very strongly about habits. I like what the brother said-that when he is wearing his gray habit it reminds him of who he is and what he stands for. I agree totally! I think that if you think some kind of habit may help you, you could try wearing something special which reminds you and helps you focus on what you are working toward: perhaps a special scarf which could substitute for a veil, or a button, pin, bracelet, scapular. You could dress in all brown (franciscan colors) or in all black and get an iron-on patch that symbolizes your discernment. Wear a cincture rope for a belt. Wear a stole around your neck. There are all kinds of things you can do…ask the Holy Spirit for guidance and be creative!👍
Click to expand...
I just now read that 😛
 
GrahamAPhone said:
Thanks everyone,
I bet it sounds silly, but you know how some of the habits have those like belt things with the knots on the end, I started wearing one of those.
It helps me remember to pray, and to act like I should, and It holds up my pants
lol
Click to expand...
Which one are you talking about, the Franciscan chord or the cincture used with the alb? The Franciscan chord may only be worn by Franciscans. Just in case you don’t know how to tell them apart, the Franciscan chord has three capuchin knots. The cincture has one capuchin knot at the tip.

Fraternally,

Br. JR, OSF 🙂
 
It has been so enlightening listening to the various replies to Grahamaphone about her desire to wear some kind of habit to help her focus even though she is a lay person. I am the first person to defend the religious habit; that it should be worn, that it should not be hidden, that it is a holy sacramental. The one thing the Church has never been any good at is differentiating between the necessity of upholding necessary rules and regulations and the mandate to treat individual people as Jesus would and to meet their spiritual needs----that is the function of the Church. It is important that the full religious habit as it has been known for centuries be reserved for proper use by religious. But here was a human being-Grahamaphone-who was seeking assistance with a legitimate need, but everyone simply quoted rules and canon law at her. This didn’t help her situation. The Church does that, too. Even in the midst of realiziong order must be kept within the Body of Christ, we faithful are charged with being Christ to one another, especially when someone is in need and asking for help. We must be willing to balance maintaining order with ministering to individuals as Jesus would have done. I am glad she found something that m et her needs and is helping her focus on what she wants to do. :o
 
janessa1850 said:
It has been so enlightening listening to the various replies to Grahamaphone about her desire to wear some kind of habit to help her focus even though she is a lay person. I am the first person to defend the religious habit; that it should be worn, that it should not be hidden, that it is a holy sacramental. The one thing the Church has never been any good at is differentiating between the necessity of upholding necessary rules and regulations and the mandate to treat individual people as Jesus would and to meet their spiritual needs----that is the function of the Church. It is important that the full religious habit as it has been known for centuries be reserved for proper use by religious. But here was a human being-Grahamaphone-who was seeking assistance with a legitimate need, but everyone simply quoted rules and canon law at her. This didn’t help her situation. The Church does that, too. Even in the midst of realiziong order must be kept within the Body of Christ, we faithful are charged with being Christ to one another, especially when someone is in need and asking for help. We must be willing to balance maintaining order with ministering to individuals as Jesus would have done. I am glad she found something that m et her needs and is helping her focus on what she wants to do. :o
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Amen.
I get kind of tired when I lay down my personal situation, and people just ignore what I have said, as though everything is so cut and dry. I know that some things have strict rules, but when it comes to individuals it varies. Like some people just say, 'no, religious habits don’t help discernment ’ , when clearly, i am asking because I (as me) need it for my own personal reasons.
And I don’t want you to feel bad, but I don’t know how to say it with out being blunt, but I’m a dude
lol
I know GrahamAPhone is kind of a girly nickname 😛
 
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