religious view

[soxpimp]

why does the church believe it is wrong to have sex before marriage?

 

[kage_ar]

Because God said so.

 

[Em_in_FL]

The Catechism of the Catholic Church is good place to start when asking questions like “why does the church teach this”…

To answer your question from the Catechism… from this section…

V. The Goods and Requirements of Conjugal Love

1643
"Conjugal love involves a totality, in which all the elements of the person enter—appeal of the body and instinct, power of feeling and affectivity, aspiration of the spirit and of will. It aims at a deeply personal unity, a unity that, beyond union in one flesh, leads to forming one heart and soul; it demands indissolubility and faithfulness in definitive mutual giving; and it is open to fertility. In a word it is a question of the normal characteristics of all natural conjugal love, but with a new significance which not only purifies and strengthens them, but raises them to the extent of making them the expression of specifically Christian values."152

The unity and indissolubility of marriage

1644
The love of the spouses requires, of its very nature, the unity and indissolubility of the spouses’ community of persons, which embraces their entire life: "so they are no longer two, but one flesh."153 They "are called to grow continually in their communion through day-to-day fidelity to their marriage promise of total mutual self-giving."154 This human communion is confirmed, purified, and completed by communion in Jesus Christ, given through the sacrament of Matrimony. It is deepened by lives of the common faith and by the Eucharist received together.

Hope that helps a little!

 

[kuta02]

I believe sex is a gift from God. I beleive if you love a girl or been with a girl for a long time and you decide to have sex its your choice. Usually when you decide to have sex it means that you truly love one another. So in result sex before marriage is not bad or good

 

[Em_in_FL]

More from the Catechism in this section…

III. The Love of Husband and Wife

2360
Sexuality is ordered to the conjugal love of man and woman. In marriage the physical intimacy of the spouses becomes a sign and pledge of spiritual communion. Marriage bonds between baptized persons are sanctified by the sacrament.

2361
"Sexuality, by means of which man and woman give themselves to one another through the acts which are proper and exclusive to spouses, is not something simply biological, but concerns the innermost being of the human person as such. It is realized in a truly human way only if it is an integral part of the love by which a man and woman commit themselves totally to one another until death."143

2362
"The acts in marriage by which the intimate and chaste union of the spouses takes place are noble and honorable; the truly human performance of these acts fosters the self-giving they signify and enriches the spouses in joy and gratitude."145 Sexuality is a source of joy and pleasure:

2363
The spouses’ union achieves the twofold end of marriage: the good of the spouses themselves and the transmission of life. These two meanings or values of marriage cannot be separated without altering the couple’s spiritual life and compromising the goods of marriage and the future of the family.

The conjugal love of man and woman thus stands under the twofold obligation of fidelity and fecundity.

Conjugal fidelity

2364
The married couple forms "the intimate partnership of life and love established by the Creator and governed by his laws; it is rooted in the conjugal covenant, that is, in their irrevocable personal consent."147 Both give themselves definitively and totally to one another. They are no longer two; from now on they form one flesh. The covenant they freely contracted imposes on the spouses the obligation to preserve it as unique and indissoluble.148 "What therefore God has joined together, let not man put asunder."149

2365
Fidelity expresses constancy in keeping one’s given word. God is faithful. The Sacrament of Matrimony enables man and woman to enter into Christ’s fidelity for his Church. Through conjugal chastity, they bear witness to this mystery before the world.

 

[jmcrae]

why does the church believe it is wrong to have sex before marriage?

Because sex is a prayer for children, and for permanent love. These are prayers that God likes to answer, but if you are not prepared for the answer to these prayers to be “Yes,” then you should not be having sex.

It is also a promise that you make with your body, to love that person forever, and to have children with them. If you are not committed to that person in the Sacrament of Matrimony, then your body is making a false promise - telling itself, and also the body of the other person, a terrible lie.

When there are lies, there cannot be trust. When there is no trust, we have unhappiness.

God, on the other hand, wants us to be happy, so He wants us to be truthful, not only with our words, but also with our bodies, so that we can trust each other, and be happy. This is why God forbids us from having sex outside of marriage - so that, in the end, we can be happy, rather than unhappy.

 

[idrum677]

I believe sex is a gift from God. I beleive if you love a girl or been with a girl for a long time and you decide to have sex its your choice. Usually when you decide to have sex it means that you truly love one another. So in result sex before marriage is not bad or good

I belive that the question was:

why does the church believe it is wrong to have sex before marriage?

Lets keep it to topic and not distort personal views with church teaching.

 

[KCT]

I believe sex is a gift from God. I beleive if you love a girl or been with a girl for a long time and you decide to have sex its your choice.

Of course it is. But that doesn’t mean there can’t be negative consequences.

 

[ElizabethAnne]

I believe sex is a gift from God. I beleive if you love a girl or been with a girl for a long time and you decide to have sex its your choice. Usually when you decide to have sex it means that you truly love one another. So in result sex before marriage is not bad or good

True love requires commitment. Any couple that is not ready to commit to a life-long relationship and children (marriage) is not ready to have sex.

 

[KCT]

why does the church believe it is wrong to have sex before marriage?

Short answer: Sex is for bonding and babies. You shouldn’t be bonding or having babies w/ anyone but your spouse.

 

[manualman]

Because sex is so much more than a pleasurable indulgence!

Sex mystically and permanently links two people together. It is given to us by God to be a physical manifestation of the permanent union of marriage.

There truly is no such thing as a one night stand. You are changed for life by that experience. Similarly, a longtime couple who has intercourse, but eventually splits has permanently damaged their ability love another selflessly and totally.

Here’s a great image. Take a piece of red and a piece of blue construction paper. Glue them together with a thin smear of Elmer’s glue. The next day, peel the pieces apart. Look close, can you ever TOTALLY separate the two? Nope.

Sound absurd? Look around you. Do you really think it is a coincidence that the divorce rate is directly proportional to the promiscuity rate? Nope.

 

[soxpimp]

but im saying if a man and woman are in love why do they need to be married to have sex. you can still be in love without being married and i think that it is a personal choice so i dont see how the church can look down upon it

 

[nobeerinheaven]

Because God said so.

I don’t think you can improve on this answer. It is straight to the point, which is what this OP needs.

God said so, through his divine revelation to this Church. If you disobey God and his Church, then you commit grave sin and put your soul in very real danger of eternal damnation. That’s why not to have sex before marriage!

Edit: I think this is baiting, people. New user, two posts only and both in this thread. Sheesh.

 

[jmcrae]

but im saying if a man and woman are in love why do they need to be married to have sex. you can still be in love without being married and i think that it is a personal choice so i dont see how the church can look down upon it

Yes, you can certainly be in love without being married, but what is love? Love is to wish the highest good for the other person.

Sex outside of marriage is not the highest good for the other person, because sex is intended for married people, to bond them together and to give them children. When we have sex outside of marriage, we have to distort it in some way, by using birth control and by using condoms to protect from sexually transmitted diseases. Thus, sex outside of marriage is not what anybody would consider to be good sex, anyhow.

They haven’t invented anything yet that prevents the emotional bond from taking place, though, so when it comes time for the couple to break up and go their separate ways, things get really, really messy at the emotional level.

 

[KCT]

but im saying if a man and woman are in love why do they need to be married to have sex. you can still be in love without being married and i think that it is a personal choice so i dont see how the church can look down upon it

Does what the Church thinks bother you? If so, why?

You can go do whatever you want. God gave us free will. But actions have consequences.

I know many people who regret premarital sex. I know of no one who regrets waiting.