Renewal of Wedding Vows

[bilop]

My husband and I will be celebrating our 40th Wedding Anniversary this Sunday and I was wondering what the significance of renewing our vows means. I was thinking about asking our Pastor about doing it at one of the Masses on Sunday. Personally, I think it would be very appropriate to stand before God in thanks and praise upon reaching such a milestone and renew our vows once again before our Church Community and family.

I wasn’t sure exactly what the significance of it was in terms of the Sacrament. Can you enlighten me.

Congratulations!

A renewal of vows has no Sacramental significance, the vows were made once and for all, are final, and need no renewing.

It’s just a nice ceremony, and an occasion for a blessing, but totally non-Sacramental.

I personally would just go for the blessing, perhaps a mass of Thanksgiving if the priest would oblige, but, to each his own.

God Bless

 

[zab]

Our last pastor enjoyed obtaining a Papal Blessing for those couple celebrating their 50th wedding anniversary. (He would only do this for the 50th) Towards the end of Mass before the final blessing, the pastor would ask everyone to sit and would ask the couple to come forward for the renewal of their wedding vows, then he would present to them the papal blessing.

Those wanting the papal blessing had to notify the parish office many months in advance- something like 6 or 7 months in advance. Check with your parish office.

 

[FrDavid96]

I don’t know how long “renewal of marriage vows” has taken place. I don’t remember it done until recently.
…

I can’t say how long it’s been done, but I can say that it’s found in the pre-Vatican II Roman Ritual.

I checked a 1954 printing of the Collectio Rituum, and it’s in there. I think it’s safe to presume that it had been there for quite some time before. Whether or not it was “practiced” might be more of a local custom, as I do recall family stories of this happening in the 1940s, and being quite popular.

 

[panoikei]

This brings up another interesting custom I’ve read much about and seen you, FrDavid, talk about, parents blessing children. My pastor, in his early 61, recalled when his grandparents would make the sign of the cross on his head. He said that his mother had done the same. Customs. This never happened to me. I was very poorly catechized to the point of following my conscience right out of the Church into a Christian only faith that I was exposed to as a child. I received a “believers baptism” by being totally submerged in water and beleived to be released from all my sins. One of the main attractions to that faith was the outright rejection of divorce.

 

[sacristan1]

Yesterday we stood before God and this great Catholic Church and renewed our vows with a heart full of thanks and praise to God for all the blessings he has given us. We know that without his grace and guidance we would not have made it this far. It was a beautiful and powerful experience for us and our family and the faithful attending Mass seemed to be overjoyed for us. I would recommend it highly especially if you are in poor health and the possibility exists that you may not see your 50th. It is POWERFUL.

 

[FrDavid96]

This brings up another interesting custom I’ve read much about and seen you, FrDavid, talk about, parents blessing children. My pastor, in his early 61, recalled when his grandparents would make the sign of the cross on his head. He said that his mother had done the same. Customs. This never happened to me. I was very poorly catechized to the point of following my conscience right out of the Church into a Christian only faith that I was exposed to as a child. I received a “believers baptism” by being totally submerged in water and beleived to be released from all my sins. One of the main attractions to that faith was the outright rejection of divorce.

I don’t want to get us off-topic but the custom of parents making the sign of the cross on children and saying a prayer for them is a good thing indeed. And yes, celebrating wedding anniversaries and getting a blessing from the priest at that time is likewise a good thing. Customs (which here refers to “traditions” rather than the other meaning of the word which would be “legal precedent” or “common law” in our secular vocabulary) do vary greatly. In our American experience what we know as customs from our childhood often have to do very much with our own ethnic backgrounds and the predominant ethnic origins of the area where we were raised. Sometimes a particular saint might be more “popular” with certain groups. Irish Catholics are more likely to observe St Patrick’s day while E. Europeans more likely to celebrate St. Nicholas or the 3 Kings. I don’t know of any “pattern” when it comes to wedding anniversaries, as I’ve always thought that this was more of a universal practice rather than one that applies to particular “groups” of Catholics. I was a bit surprised when some posters said that they had never seen an anniversary celebration.

The Church gives us a ritual for this blessing which includes a “renewal of vows.” And doing this in a public setting does contribute to the overall emphasis which the Church must place on the sanctity and indissolubility of the marriage covenant.

 

[panoikei]

I don’t want to get us off-topic but the custom of parents making the sign of the cross on children and saying a prayer for them is a good thing indeed.
…

I was a bit surprised when some posters said that they had never seen an anniversary celebration.

The Church gives us a ritual for this blessing which includes a “renewal of vows.” And doing this in a public setting does contribute to the overall emphasis which the Church must place on the sanctity and indissolubility of the marriage covenant.

I don’t think we’re getting off topic by way or how I correlated the practice. I had never seen an anniversary cermony or blessing done before that I can recall in the Catholic Church. I’ve known of them in protestant faiths. But since I lived in Louisiana formerly this may have been influenced by the local customs or traditions. Maybe I just never notices. You see I only lived in a predominanty Catholic community part of my life because my protestant family is much larger than my Catholic one. I have uncountable cousins on my mom’s side, who is one of ten. My father’s side of the family is much smaller, about 4/5ths the size. My wifes family is all protestant, save and except her from 2 years ago. Her parents had a 50th year anniversary, nothing like I’ve ever seen before.

Maybe it was subconscious that I didn’t know because my parents were divorced in 1966 or 67. Both got remarried, and my dad civily married and divorced my step-mom, who actually saved me from a live of severe marginalization and abandonment. It’s no wonder I ever went through the rest of the sacraments at my elevated age between 14 and 17. So maybe this is why I don’t remember any stories of “renewal of marriage vows” or blessing. I lived most of my life amont Protestants and only returned to Catholicism kicking and screaming just 2 years ago. I actually wanted to become Orhtodox because in my mind, consciance there was no way the Catholic Church could be the real Church established by Christ because of all the openly illicit and immoral behavior from the clergy, no offense. I’ve sense dealt with my offender in a way that would not be approved, by finding him like a scoury dog and contacting him via email. He is “laicized” and married now. My story is all over the place so I’ve changed my name several times to hide my identity and his. I do not want any more scandal in my life. I want to heal from it and hopefully help others going through their private pain from this kind of thing.

Thank you for your vocation as a priest, Fr. David. My wife and I constantly pray for orthodoxy in the Church clergy. I still have some issues or doubts with certain dogmas that bother me, but hold on anyway. Our Orhtodox brother and sisters seem to have a lot of good points that make sense to me. Maybe my protestantism influenced me way too much. I believe in the one holy catholic and apostolic church, but I wonder about whether the “c” in catholic should actually be “C” as in Catholic. Ignatius of Antioch’s writings have influence my faith and helped bring me back along with reading the Didache. It was the ancient church writings that answered the many questions that popped up while I was practicing our previous non-Catholic Christian only faith…set up as the church restoration movement by Alexander Campbell in the 1800’s. We were taught that we were the real church of Christ and that Catholicism was the first of many apostate “churches” with members doomed to hell that popped up. So it’s been a very difficult road for me in particular. However, my wife has embraced the Catholic faith even though her father was a faithful bishop/elder. But she has recently learned the hard way why so many Catholics have such a diffiult time being Catholic. The example is this past Presedential election putting Obama in office. My wife voted for Obama. I did not. This has caused hardship between us because my conscience won’t let me vote for someone like Obama. But she believes he will actually do more good than harm like the Republicans have. I hope she’s right. But I seriously doubt that to be true. Please pray for us. We’re seeing our pastor tomorrow to discus issues.

 

[707947]

Blessed anniversary!

Our diocese is celebrating the jubilee for Weddings (25th, 50th, 60th) this coming Saturday. What you could ask your pastor to do is to have your marriage blessed after the post-Communion prayer, but, before the final blessing. This ritual is in the Book of Blessings. That is what my parents did for their 25th anniversary.

Greetings…Yes. We will be celebrating our 25th Anniversary as well. May I know if there is any Catholic mass/Missalette celebrating your 25th Anniversary available on the internet. I have been doing a search but have not been lucky so far. I hope someone could help with this Thankyou. We will be consulting with our Bishop in our parish in a few days and would like some sort of a guide. In addition to a mass we wish a Prayer for the Family to be said during the Mass and the Blessing of some Saint Benedict Medals to be made as well. I would appreciate if somebody could have a link to a “Ritual Mass” on Renewal of Marriage Vows.

 

[peajay6]

I am presently attending RCIA classes. I will be Baptized, Confirmed and receive the Eucharist at Easter. I love attending Mass and can not wait for the next Sunday to get her. I have been inspired. For the first time in my life I feel like I belong here.

I have been married for 26 years. My husband and I were married by the judge at the local court house. I love my husband, but it was not my idea of the perfect place to start our union, but neither of us were attending church nor was it a part of our lives.

I am wondering about re-newing our vows in the church. What are our options. Is this something I should discuss with Fr.? I plan on that anyway. Just wanting opinions.

Thanks!