Reparation for lying

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RandomGirl

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If this doesn’t fit in the casual discussion category feel free to tell me.
I do realize we have to make reparation for lies that harm someone or ruin their reputation. If you lie about what someone did or made something up (ex. This random person on social media told me to do this bad thing. You lie that someone else told you to do something bad, when you probably did it on your own) would that need reparation?
The white lies?
Lies you made when you were a kid?
Lies that a person has probably forgotten?
If you don’t tell the person what actually happened can you make it up in another way? Fasting, being nice to the person, praying for the person… etc
Thanks for your time
 
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Welcome to Catholic Answers Forums! I always enjoy seeing another Random member here.

My approach to your question is like this, and this may be applicable to other wrongs as well:

First consider whether restitution is possible. That means making things the way they were before. With reputational harm, usually we can’t do that.

Then consider direct reparation. That means letting the other person know, and providing some good to offset the harm (sort of like payback), and trying to heal your relationship with that person (reconciliation).

When direct reparation is not possible, carry out indirect reparation, that is, offsetting the harm by providing some good not to the person directly, but to his, her, or your community, or to the poor, or to society. The reason this may be acceptable is that the harm spreads like ripples in a pond. When you harm someone, you also harm the community and society. You can do something to make it better.

The Sacrament of Reconciliation (Confession) is an excellent way to start. That restores you to a right relationship with Jesus, and through him provides spiritual good to those you have harmed and to all the world.

Also repent. Resolve not to commit such a sin again. Don’t be discouraged if you do, but you must continue to make that effort to avoid sin.

Then perform penance and offer prayers. The priest at Confession may let you off with an easy penance, like the Lord’s Prayer. If you have harmed others gravely, I would suggest that you perform additional service to society or the community, and offer additional prayers for those you have harmed.

Don’t get obsessive about it, though. You may always feel occasional pangs of guilt and grief for the harm you have done. I certainly do. I feel awful about stuff I did even 40 years ago. But when that happens, just offer another prayer and ask God to bless the people you have harmed.

Also pray for yourself, that your spirit may be healed and that you may find peace.

I will say a prayer for you too.
 
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Thank you for the (name removed by moderator)ut. I actually went to a priest about one lie I was worrying about and he said it was my choice if I wanted to tell the person or not. I don’t even know if the person remembers the conversation we had. Plus, it is kind of personal situation that I lied about and the only person I’ve told about what I lied about and the lie itself was a priest in confession. I do think I could tell her if we got a bit closer and I could explain it to her. Again, thank you
 
RandomGirl said:
If this doesn’t fit in the casual discussion category feel free to tell me.
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One problem with placing it in Casual Discussion is that it is excluded from (does not appear on) the Latest Topics list. I will move it to the Spirituality forum (it’s either that or Moral Theology) so it gets more exposure and hopefully more answers.
 
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Lying is one of those sins that might hurt others (for example, ruin someone else’s reputation) but in many cases it just hurts the liar. It causes him to develop a bad habit of lying, may cause him to get a reputation as a liar, and may compound the harm if he’s lying to cover up another sin. In the case of a kid lying to parent or teacher, 9 times out of 10 the adult sees through the lie and may not suffer any personal damage for it. That doesn’t make it okay to lie, of course; it just means the liar primarily harmed himself.

In these cases where a liar primarily just hurt himself by his lie, it might be appropriate to make reparation to Jesus.
 
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I was informed by a 3rd party on lies being told about me. I have to say that it hurts. But if the person came to ask for forgiveness I would give it to them. The dumb dormant evil part of me just wants to move away from those persons for good and never see them again rather than face the discussion. But the inner child in me wants to just kiss and make up and let it go.
If you can’t face that person again and tell them what you did, maybe pray for them and their happiness in this world and so that the lie you said simply is forgotten and does not hurt them.
You and your intention are in my prayers tonight.
May God bless you.
 
It’s not a lie that I’m keeping up with other lies. If the topic came up (I’m guessing it won’t) but if it did I would tell them the truth. I just don’t think it would be good to bring it up after this long. One thing I’m worried about is if I am remembering things wrong.
 
+1 for the sacrament of reconciliation

If it can be fixed, “bearing false witness against a neighbor” I would try to fix it. But let the angels and saints work on the problem. Next time it comes your way for verification, say you were mistaken the first time. And it doesn’t hurt to say something nice about that person to the person you lied to either…

There are lots of patron saints and it would be excellent if you prayed for them about an issue pertaining to their occupation or life. I keep this directory bookmarked for times like these:

 
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I think that reparation is really in order when the lie you tell destroys someone else’s life or causes then serious harm.
 
I can identify w/ you, about white lies, I mean.
I once told someone a white lie to COVER UP
some fear of mine. I made amends by telling
the person something positive about myself
and that made me feel LESS GUILTY in her
eyes.
 
If I were you I’d pray on it, ask God what he wants and then be patient. Yes offer things you think He may want and most certainly confess them or all the ones you remember. I think you said that you had done that, the priests advice is of course Jesus’ words as he (the priest) is there in the person of Christ. So you have been told by Jesus himself that it’s your choice if you want to tell the person or not, you can of course in your prayers ask for further guidance on this. You may find that if you keep on praying and listening out for God’s answer, seeking only His will, that He will provide opportunities for you to make reparation in gentle and perfect ways because after all, only he knows you and what you need. Trust in God. That you want to do reparation is of course a start in itself of the reparation. God bless you
 
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