Resigning from the LDS

[debbie_h]

Hallelujah, first of all!
Anyway, when you say “officially resign,” do you mean have your name removed from “The List”,
be “self-excommincated” from the LDS? I have watched a lot of episodes of Heart of the Matter
(Where Mormonism meets Biblical Christianity) where a lot of ex-Mormons called into the show
saying how they did something like, having their names removed from the list, so it wouldn’t be
a bad idea. On the other hand, that LDS list thing really bears no spiritual merit, doesn’t count
much for anything, on the other other hand, it is wise to break off your connection to Mormonism.

I’m afraid that if you do want to have your name taken off, you do need to contact the bishop of your
area and request that, then follow up and badger him, because the LDS don’t want you to leave and
will try to get you to change your mind, so just keep in your persistence.

Yes, we’ll I have been thinking about whether I should officially cut my ties with the LDS church or if it is too much of a hassle to do so. I just don’t want any drama or have to meet with anyone & argue my case.

 

[debbie_h]

Marie & iepuras, thank you for those links, I will definitely look into them.

 

[debbie_h]

A wonderful couple joined our parish awhile back and we struck up a wonderful friendship. In the course of our conversations, he told me this was his second marriage as the first one was when he was LDS.

When he left the LDS church and converted to the Catholic faith, his ex-wife and three children refused any contact with him. That was over 25 years ago and still no contact with his now grown children and the pain is evident in my friend.

Your parents/family may be more understanding then my friends, but be prepared just the same.

You are in my prayers, and Welcome Home:thumbsup:

I have seen & heard of these things happening to people who leave the LDS church.
That is what I fear, not for myself but, that my kids may lose my side of the family, especially when I am the one who makes the effort to go & see my parents regularly. I do pray that their hearts will be softened & that they will accept my conversion.

 

[debbie_h]

Thank you everyone for their well wishes & congratulatory offers. While it has been a long & bumpy road ( & I still have much more to learn & understand) I am very excited to be baptised soon, church & date has been booked! I really do feel like I am coming home

 

[SteveVH]

I have seen & heard of these things happening to people who leave the LDS church.
That is what I fear, not for myself but, that my kids may lose my side of the family, especially when I am the one who makes the effort to go & see my parents regularly. I do pray that their hearts will be softened & that they will accept my conversion.

What I find strange about this whole situation is the emphasis that the LDS place on family. To then violate those principles seems a little contradictory. I have told my kids all of their lives that there is nothing they could do to make me stop loving them. They may disappoint me with some of their decisions, but to break a relationship with them is beyond my imagination.

I will pray for you tonight.

 

[Miriam1947]

**What I find strange about this whole situation is the emphasis that the LDS place on family. ** To then violate those principles seems a little contradictory. I have told my kids all of their lives that there is nothing they could do to make me stop loving them. They may disappoint me with some of their decisions, but to break a relationship with them is beyond my imagination.

I will pray for you tonight.

I have never quite understood the LDS families together forever thing.

Only temple worthy Mormons go to the CK so if someone in the family is not temple worthy (perhaps they haven’t paid full tithing because feeding their children seemed important rather than giving 10% of their income) but otherwise keeps all the rules, they go to a lower level of heaven. How is that families together forever?

 

[Marie5890]

I have never quite understood the LDS families together forever thing.

Only temple worthy Mormons go to the CK so if someone in the family is not temple worthy (perhaps they haven’t paid full tithing because feeding their children seemed important rather than giving 10% of their income) but otherwise keeps all the rules, they go to a lower level of heaven. How is that families together forever?

Miriam, the actually teaching is that families “can” be together forever. Not that they will.

By their doctrine, yes, families have to be “sealed” to each other, etc etc etc…

Odd, though, my family is my family because of love. That is what binds, love.

 

[Della]

Thank you.
They have this hope that I will return to the LDS faith & have my husband & children baptised Mormon. They are not thrilled that I have married a Catholic & Many times they have “invited” the missionaries over to their home during our family dinners to ‘talk to my husband’ & yes my parents have made many statements about my marriage being for time only.

That’s not a good situation–I’m sorry you’re going through this. :console: I’d say, and this is for you to decide, of course, but if your parents will not respect your decision to become Catholic and insist on inviting people over to “convert” your husband against your will, then you have to be the one to set the boundaries. If they do this again, you might want to tell them you don’t appreciate these attempts to interfere with your life and that if they won’t stop doing this kind of thing you won’t be visiting them. Sometimes we have to set ultimatums and then stick to them in order for others to understand that we will not put up with their actions, no matter how well intentioned. You are not choosing to keep your parents out of your children’s lives–they are by their actions and attitude. In a few words, you have to put your foot down and mean it or they’ll never stop doing this kind of thing and they may try to undermine your authority with your children. Be firm, but be kind and hopefully you will see a change in their behavior. God bless you and your family.

 

[dolphinlove]

Give it time and welcome back home to the true church Jesus intended

Things will be hard to begin with, but think of it like this, eventually your parents might try to convert you back, after all, its their duty, but when they dont have the answers, they might start to take Catholicism more seriously as well, remember how it started for you, you are the start of their journey back home as well.
Will pray for you and your parents conversion to the truth

 

[debbie_h]

Give it time and welcome back home to the true church Jesus intended

Things will be hard to begin with, but think of it like this, eventually your parents might try to convert you back, after all, its their duty, but when they dont have the answers, they might start to take Catholicism more seriously as well, remember how it started for you, you are the start of their journey back home as well.
Will pray for you and your parents conversion to the truth

Who knows how long that will take, if it does happen, but yes it would be truly wonderful if they do!

 

[Randy_Carson]

How exciting that you’ll be baptized soon! Congratulations.

Among us former LDS, some have resigned, others not. When I left Mormonism, I just left. There was no such thing as resigning and no internet that would have informed me of its existence. By the time I was baptized Catholic, 20+ years had gone by and doing anything for the Mormon church was about 99999999 on my list of things to do. Still is. I have not resigned. Think about it once in a while, but I see it as the same as being on a marketing list of a business. It’s their list, has nothing to do with me. It would require I make contact with Mormon leaders, which sounds as appealing to me as getting a root canal.

BUT, I do understand why others resign, especially if leaving the Mormon church is a relatively recent event and resigning seems to be the norm.

LDS Church leaders will contact you if/when you resign. They do so to ensure that the request came from you and is not someone playing a prank. From what I understand your LDS membership records are flagged in some way, indicating that you have resigned. Similar to someone who has been excommunicated. Resignation and excommunication are the same thing to the Mormon church. Both require that you be re-baptized if you ever go back, so they want to make sure you don’t just show up in some ward and join back in as though nothing happened.

In theory, the LDS church claims your membership records are confidential, but I have read of stories where the ward leaders did not keep the confidentiality. I’ve also read where parents asked for their membership records, which includes a list of children, and the resigned child (you) flagged clearly as resigned. So I wouldn’t count on your LDS parents ever not knowing.

Just out of curiosity, do you think there is any value in the witness to the leadership that the resignation makes? IOW, do they stop and think, “Gee, there goes another one…”?

 

[iepuras]

Just out of curiosity, do you think there is any value in the witness to the leadership that the resignation makes? IOW, do they stop and think, “Gee, there goes another one…”?

I think they do pay attention to the resignations. Publicly, the leadership ignores them, but I think they are really concerned. It hurts when educated members who have been paying thousands of dollars in tithing each year resign.

Elder Marlin K. Jensen, former general authority and church historian, has publicly acknowledged that LDS members are “leaving in droves.” He stated as much in a very open and honest manner to a group of students at the University of Utah. Below is a link to a Reuters article about the issues the LDS church is facing. Elder Jensen makes it clear that the Big 15 are very aware of what is going on.

uk.reuters.com/article/2012/01/30/uk-mormonchurch-idUKTRE80T1CP20120130

I will also add that Elder Jensen was recently “sacked”. He was released from his position as church historian and general authority at General Conference last October and is now in quiet retirement as an “emeritus” general authority.

 

[Randy_Carson]

I think they do pay attention to the resignations. Publicly, the leadership ignores them, but I think they are really concerned. It hurts when educated members who have been paying thousands of dollars in tithing each year resign.

Elder Marlin K. Jensen, former general authority and church historian, has publicly acknowledged that LDS members are “leaving in droves.” He stated as much in a very open and honest manner to a group of students at the University of Utah. Below is a link to a Reuters article about the issues the LDS church is facing. Elder Jensen makes it clear that the Big 15 are very aware of what is going on.

uk.reuters.com/article/2012/01/30/uk-mormonchurch-idUKTRE80T1CP20120130

I will also add that Elder Jensen was recently “sacked”. He was released from his position as church historian and general authority at General Conference last October and is now in quiet retirement as an “emeritus” general authority.

But on a personal level, does it or would it cause them to think about these issues for themselves? To examine their own belief in a new light?

 

[RebeccaJ]

Just out of curiosity, do you think there is any value in the witness to the leadership that the resignation makes? IOW, do they stop and think, “Gee, there goes another one…”?

I don’t see the value in it.

 

[eddie_too]

just as a point of clarification as i have noticed this concept of covenant marriage comes up frequently in the lds/catholic discussions. Jesus taught us that in heaven there is NO giving or taking in marriage, the faithful live as do the angels. Matthew 12:25.

 

[iepuras]

But on a personal level, does it or would it cause them to think about these issues for themselves? To examine their own belief in a new light?

For some of them, I think it does. I don’t think the resignations themselves mean much but the reasons why people are leaving can. Elder Jensen may be an example. You have to wonder why he is now “emeritus”. There used to not be very many emeritus or retired general authorities. The general understanding is that a calling as a general authority is a calling for life. None of the 12 apostles have retired or resigned, but every year, there are a handful of general authorities from the quorums of the seventy that are released as “emeritus”. There are more new emeritus seventies announced at each General Conference now than 15-20 years ago. For some reason, church historians seem to end up having issues. I wonder why.

When a man becomes a general authority (quorum of the seventy), they are given money by the church to settle their temporal affairs so they can “focus on the work.” The LDS church is run by businessmen and lawyers, so one can only imagine the strings attached to anything the general authorities receive from the church in the way of compensation or loans. I am sure that they all have signed non-disclosure agreements and clawback agreements for any stipends, loans or other money given by the LDS church to the general authority. If significant personal wealth is tied to the church, it makes it that much easier to keep one’s mouth shut and go along, especially if someone has a lot of family connections in the LDS church. Most of the general authorities are from long-time, well-connected Mormon families. They marry each other. They are the elite. Even if they do know the truth that it is not God’s one true church, many probably rationalize in their own minds that the church is a net good for the “regular folks”.

 

[debbie_h]

Just out of curiosity, do you think there is any value in the witness to the leadership that the resignation makes? IOW, do they stop and think, “Gee, there goes another one…”?

I don’t know how far up the chain notification of resignations go. Growing up I never knew of let alone heard of anyone reigning from the church. It was either a member going inactive or excommunication. Only in my adult life do I know now that you can resign from the church. What it means to me is that even though I am one person, I don’t want my name as part of the LDS census. The LDS church still counts you as a member even if you have gone inactive or left for another faith, which would skew their membership numbers. Is the LDS still the fastest growing church as they claim?

 

[zaffiroborant]

I don’t know how far up the chain notification of resignations go. Growing up I never knew of let alone heard of anyone reigning from the church. It was either a member going inactive or excommunication. Only in my adult life do I know now that you can resign from the church. What it means to me is that even though I am one person, I don’t want my name as part of the LDS census. The LDS church still counts you as a member even if you have gone inactive or left for another faith, which would skew their membership numbers. Is the LDS still the fastest growing church as they claim?

Can’t see that it’s growing all that much, it’s still only 1.2 percent of the US population, that hasn’t changed for years. Seems it is even less than 1.2 percent of the world population. Not seeing an inordinate amount of growth there.

 

[RebeccaJ]

I don’t know how far up the chain notification of resignations go. Growing up I never knew of let alone heard of anyone reigning from the church. It was either a member going inactive or excommunication. Only in my adult life do I know now that you can resign from the church.

I’ve never seen any evidence for people resigning before 1985.

 

[RebeccaJ]

How I see it is, a continuation of jumping through meaningless hoops. Has no value to anyone.

But like I said, I understand the psychological reasons. Breaking the ties and starting over. I did that long ago, and don’t feel the need to connect the ties in order to break them again.

Membership numbers are to me the same as any other business who counts me as a customer because I purchased one thing 10 years ago. Their problem, not mine.