Ridiculously Long Confession

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I have recently discovered that many, if not all, past confessions I have ever made were invalid due to the intentional withholding of numerous sins. Add to that the fact that I have an extremely guilty conscience, and now I have been drafting up an extremely long paper to try to confess every single sin I can possibly think of in as much detail as I can in order to satisfy myself that my next confession will be valid. I will have to schedule an appointment with a priest for this as it will be much too long for a Saturday confessional. This will also be incredibly difficult to endure with the plethora of despicable sins throughout my life, but that’s another story. Also another story is that I am facing a dilemna with trying to reconcile certain things in my life, most notably my job, with being able to get myself into a position where I can feel like I have some type of firm purpose of amendment so that the confession will be valid. This is also something I am struggling with and trying to figure out before I confess.

But my main question is this: I have to read off this entire paper in order to assure myself I have absolutely confessed to everything. Right now I’m up to 20 typed pages and it could end up longer by the time I confess. If I read my confession off of a paper, will it detract from the validity of the confession? Confession can be difficult regardless, but I keep thinking that by reading these things off of the paper I will be able to relieve some of the burden from myself by just mindlessly reading things rather than forcing myself to think of them off the top of my head. Reading them might therefore be easier and might reduce the level of humility I face during the confession. Does anyone see a problem with me reading these things in order to ensure a full confession?
 
Well, I was never a fan of the “Shopping list” for confession. I find it wholly unnecessary. What is wrong with going to confession, reflecting upon your sins, confessing what comes to mind and asking absolution for those which do not come to mind at that particular moment in time?

Also, I don’t see how your confessions were “invalid,” because you withheld sins. I would say you simply have not been absolved of those sins in particular, I don’t see how that would affect the absolution of the sins which you did confess.

And lastly, 20 typed pages of sins that you recall. There wouldn’t be enough paper in the world to type up all of the sins any given person has on their soul, perhaps you should focus less on making a list and more on improving yourself as a person and strengthening your faith.
 
Pax tecum!

For something like this, where you have a long confession to make, I would suggest making an appointment with your priest so that you’ll be sure to have time and so that the other people have time to confess, too.

In Christ,
Rand
 
You are describing what is called a “general confession,” that is, a confession of all past sins, even those previously confessed, not because they were not forgiven but because one is again sorry for them.

It is perfectly fine to read your sins from the list. This is probably the best way to guarantee that you’ll remember them.

Just remember to make an appointment, explaining that you wish to make a general confession, and don’t forget to destroy that list when you’re done!
 
Well, I was never a fan of the “Shopping list” for confession. I find it wholly unnecessary. What is wrong with going to confession, reflecting upon your sins, confessing what comes to mind and asking absolution for those which do not come to mind at that particular moment in time?

Also, I don’t see how your confessions were “invalid,” because you withheld sins. I would say you simply have not been absolved of those sins in particular, I don’t see how that would affect the absolution of the sins which you did confess.
Deliberately withholding a grave sin invalidates confession. When going to confession, we are also obligated to confess all grave sins by kind and number.

From the Catechism of the Catholic Church:
1456 Confession to a priest is an essential part of the sacrament of Penance: “All mortal sins of which penitents after a diligent self-examination are conscious must be recounted by them in confession, even if they are most secret and have been committed against the last two precepts of the Decalogue; for these sins sometimes wound the soul more grievously and are more dangerous than those which are committed openly.”

When Christ’s faithful strive to confess all the sins that they can remember, they undoubtedly place all of them before the divine mercy for pardon. But those who fail to do so and knowingly withhold some, place nothing before the divine goodness for remission through the mediation of the priest, “for if the sick person is too ashamed to show his wound to the doctor, the medicine cannot heal what it does not know.”
From The Code of Canon Law:
Can. 988 §1. A member of the Christian faithful is obliged to confess in kind and number all grave sins committed after baptism and not yet remitted directly through the keys of the Church nor acknowledged in individual confession, of which the person has knowledge after diligent examination of conscience.
 
I have recently discovered that many, if not all, past confessions I have ever made were invalid due to the intentional withholding of numerous sins.

But my main question is this: I have to read off this entire paper in order to assure myself I have absolutely confessed to everything. Right now I’m up to 20 typed pages and it could end up longer by the time I confess. …Does anyone see a problem with me reading these things in order to ensure a full confession?
It sounds that you are doing a general confession.
I imagine your 20 pages include all your venial sins. Keep in mind, the necessity is to confess you mortal sins. Please do not be scruple. I suggest you make an appointment with the confessor to get his guidance before the actual confession. And, trust in God’s mercy.
 
If I read my confession off of a paper, will it detract from the validity of the confession?
No, not at all. You are confessing them sincerely and completely; that’s all that’s necessary.
Does anyone see a problem with me reading these things in order to ensure a full confession?
Absolutely not. In fact, it is highly advisable, IMHO. In such a confession, which must cover the whole of a lifetime, I would think that not taking the precaution of writing things down would actually make one guilty if some sins are forgotten because that could have been prevented by writing them down. And I think you are wise in noting that reading off your sins instead of recalling them off the top of your head will help you keep from holding something back through embarrassment.

About 20 pages: don’t feel too bad about that. St. Ignatius Loyola spent three days making a general confession when he converted from his former ways!

One thing I would note though: you only need to include those details that change the nature of the sins; morbid details that do not change the nature of the sin are unnecessary and, in fact, undesirable.
Well, I was never a fan of the “Shopping list” for confession. I find it wholly unnecessary. What is wrong with going to confession, reflecting upon your sins, confessing what comes to mind and asking absolution for those which do not come to mind at that particular moment in time?
That’s fine for weekly confession. It is not fine for a general confession repeating invalid confessions made over a lifetime.
Also, I don’t see how your confessions were “invalid,” because you withheld sins. I would say you simply have not been absolved of those sins in particular, I don’t see how that would affect the absolution of the sins which you did confess.
That is the case with venial sins, but not with mortal sins. From the Catechism of the Catholic Church, no. 1456:

"Confession to a priest is an essential part of the sacrament of Penance: ‘All mortal sins of which penitents after a diligent self-examination are conscious must be recounted by them in confession, even if they are most secret and have been committed against the last two precepts of the Decalogue; for these sins sometimes wound the soul more grievously and are more dangerous than those which are committed openly.’

When Christ’s faithful strive to confess all the sins that they can remember, they undoubtedly place all of them before the divine mercy for pardon. But those who fail to do so and knowingly withhold some, place nothing before the divine goodness for remission through the mediation of the priest, ‘for if the sick person is too ashamed to show his wound to the doctor, the medicine cannot heal what it does not know.’"

God bless you!

Maria
 
Add to that the fact that I have an extremely guilty conscience, and now I have been drafting up an extremely long paper to try to confess every single sin I can possibly think of in as much detail as I can in order to satisfy myself that my next confession will be valid.
Satisfy yourself that your next confession will be valid? —KCT
 
Again, I fail to see how a lifetime’s worth of sins can still add up to 20 pages.

Barring a general confession, you can confess a lifetime’s worth of sins in under 5 minutes, completely and worthily. Those who take 20 pages of life’s sins are not doing their confessions properly.

I HATE ridiculously long confessions.
 
Again, I fail to see how a lifetime’s worth of sins can still add up to 20 pages.
It depends on the font size used. 😃
Barring a general confession, you can confess a lifetime’s worth of sins in under 5 minutes, completely and worthily.
Not necessarily. It does depend on how sinful one’s past has been, coupled with how many different kinds of sins have been committed.

It is true, however, that 20 pages probably means too many details are being gone into…

Maria
 
It depends on the font size used. 😃

Not necessarily. It does depend on how sinful one’s past has been, coupled with how many different kinds of sins have been committed.
Which still does not add up to 20 pages worth.

"I’m 34 years old and since I was 16 I’ve had pre-marital promiscuous sex with different women about 3 nights a week on the average. After I got married 8 years ago, I continued having affairs with three different women about the same frequency. Moreover, I robbed three different banks when I was 18, shoplifted around a thousand dollars’ worth of goods from different stores, sorry I can’t remember how many, maybe ten thereabouts, have had constant thoughts of killing my mother, lied more times than I can remember, but two or three of those times I badly damaged another person’s reputation. Also from time to time I disrespected my parents. I was also a serial rapist and killer; I raped and killed 20 women between the time I was 24 and 29.

“But I found the Lord last year and I truly and sincerely turn from my sinful life. I am truly sorry for having offended God and I firmly intend to make reparations to the best of my ability and never to sin again.”

There you go. How many commandments have I hit? That’s over a decade’s worth of sins, and you can do that in a few seconds, and this confession is integral in both kind and number. Some phrases indicate difficulty in remembering, but only an approximate is needed in such cases.

Five minutes should be more than enough.
 
I made my first confession at age 21. I brought in three handwritten pages full of sins, a fair portion of them grave matter :o . So yes, it’s permitted. Part of my penance was to burn the pages… it was an incredible experience to see all of that turn to dust.

Twenty pages does sound a little scrupulous though. I went into unneccessary detail in just my three pages and trust me, I was no saint. I would nix the venial sins if I were you, and concentrate on the ones that are necessary to confess.
 
porthos11,

Point conceded on the 20 pages, but not on the 5 minutes. In your example confession, you really only covered big and easy mortal sins to remember. There are lot of other commonly committed mortal sins, especially for a person who has the kind of past in your description. And they wouldn’t necessarily be as regularly or frequently committed. I think 10 or 15 minutes is not too much for such a person, considering that he is covering a lifetime of many grave sins.

Maria
 
Steve975, I found myself in a very similar situation about a year ago. I always went to confession, and confessed a few veniel sins that I wasn’t too embarrased to confess, left out all of the embarassing mortal sins,and thought I was covered under “for these and all my sins I am truely sorry.” About a year ago, I did some reading about confession, and I realized that my past confessions were’nt good confessions at all. I went in to confession one Saturday (behind the screen,) and basically told the priest what I just told you, that I had broken every single commandment in one way or another and broken some important church teachings several times, too, and I was afraid that my past confessions were not valid! (I swear I herd him giggle a little bit, too)! He told me that I did not have to go into detail, but he absolved me from all of my mortal and veniel sins. It was quick and not as painful as I thought it would be. I did not go into gorey detail about anything at all.

As someone else pointed out, you may want to ask him for some direction before you make your confession, and that may help you edit your list quite a bit!
 
Well, I was never a fan of the “Shopping list” for confession. I find it wholly unnecessary. What is wrong with going to confession, reflecting upon your sins, confessing what comes to mind and asking absolution for those which do not come to mind at that particular moment in time?
This is a good way to do it if you don’t have anything especially serious to confess.
Also, I don’t see how your confessions were “invalid,” because you withheld sins. I would say you simply have not been absolved of those sins in particular, I don’t see how that would affect the absolution of the sins which you did confess.
If you deliberately withhold a mortal sin in Confession, it not only renders that Confession invalid, but is, itself, also a mortal sin, and has to be confessed at the next Confession, along with all the other sins that were confessed at the invalid Confession.
 
IMHO I’d have to say that 20 pages would include redundancy. There are only ten commandments and the sub-sections of those commandments are to include those grave in nature. Most people have sins that they struggle with in certain areas. Sexual sins seems to top most lists but even those are classified as self abuse, fornication, adultery and those external images (pornography, internet, magazines etc.) can be confessed succinctly. In confession we acknowldege our sins against the love for God and neighbor. If we truly are contrite and resolve not to commit those sins again then we are on a path to conversion and our confession is valid. Twenty pages of sins is less than one firm purpose of amendment.

You exhibit this in your post but I fear that you are also exhibiting scrupulosity. I have this tendency and what can happen is that after you confess those twenty pages you will continue to feel that you forgot something. Then you’ll say that on page 16 you didn’t describe this or that accurately enough. Then you’ll go back to confession with the same sins because you’ll wonder if the priest paid attention to page one. Anyway, you and I both need to KNOW that God loves us more than we could ever love ourselves. His mercy is infinite. He is not wishing for you to slip up in confession so that you will lose eternal life. He will do everything in His mercy to find you free from sin and welcome you into His kingdom. I’m working on this same issue and my prayers are with you. God Bless…teachccd 🙂
 
Start out by asking the Priest if he has a need for some greens fees paid for. Then, ask about getting some extra time to hear your confession. You may find he will be very open to hearing your whole list.

Of course, I am only joking here…
 
Confession can be difficult regardless, but I keep thinking that by reading these things off of the paper I will be able to relieve some of the burden from myself by just mindlessly reading things rather than forcing myself to think of them off the top of my head. Reading them might therefore be easier and might reduce the level of humility I face during the confession.
Humility is the foundation on which reconciliation sits. If you reduce your confession to mindless babbling(as you stated above) I guarantee that you’ll leave again wondering how valid your confession was…Just a couple more pennies thrown your way:) God Bless
 
All of you keep saying the same thing. However, I saw no mention of a mortal sin being withheld, so how’s about we stop pointing that if a mortal sin is withheld then the confession is invalid, k?

No mention has been made of a mortal sin in the OP, just sins that were not mentioned during confession.

For all of you I’d like you to consider how exactly you’d get 20 pages of MORTAL sin built up, while its possible, for your dedicated Catholic striving to better him or herself, I’d say that is a pretty hefty list and, barring further detail, I would ASSUME the sins we are talking about are venial.
 
All of you keep saying the same thing. However, I saw no mention of a mortal sin being withheld, so how’s about we stop pointing that if a mortal sin is withheld then the confession is invalid, k?

No mention has been made of a mortal sin in the OP, just sins that were not mentioned during confession.

For all of you I’d like you to consider how exactly you’d get 20 pages of MORTAL sin built up, while its possible, for your dedicated Catholic striving to better him or herself, I’d say that is a pretty hefty list and, barring further detail, I would ASSUME the sins we are talking about are venial.
The OP used the word despicable sins. Yes, it’s an assumption but those would seem to be mortal. Venial sins do not require confession as they can be forgiven in the Eucharist. Usually venial sins are not so embarrassing that you would choose to omit them. I would ASSUME some of the sins are mortal.🤷
 
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