J
jdemnyan
Guest
After looking through the threads, I thought I would post a new one regarding a particular issue I am having that has not really been explored on the forums before.
As I see the many threads helping men reach a decision whether or not they’re being called to the priesthood, all of them seem to be considering entering a seminary for the first time and are having doubts about several different kinds of external as well as internal factors. And often the advice (which I admit I often give as well) to these aspirants is to at least give it a try.
However, in my case, I did give it a try and ultimately left on my own terms in after 14 months in college seminary in 2004. While I could write an entire book about what all happened there and to the events that lead to my departure, let it be suffice to say that I left not because I was sure that I didn’t have a vocation, but rather, if I did, it would be preserved for the time and circumstances that the Lord wanted to be one.
Now, as I am finally entering in my last year of undergraduate studies I am looking forward to start building a career and a life away from living with my parents, up to and including potentially attending law school. At this time, the thought of re-entering seminary never occurred to me as a real possibility at least not now.) However, it seems the more I think like this, the more the idea of priesthood (and gasp, the idea of going back to same diocese) sometimes in spite of myself. For example, in May, I went to my friend’s diaconate ordination. While I was at the reception, I ran across my old spiritual director from seminary and asked if I considered returning. I politely said that I was keeping all options open but wasn’t sure about the calling - to which he replied “I always thought you were called.” At even more so, everybody, it seems, that I run across, including non-Catholics, are wanting to know if I’m considering returning.
I should also point out two unique events that are in the process of becoming reality. First, the seminary faculty (including the Rector with whom I had no confidence in when I was there) have all been re-assigned and are being replaced by quality priests with the hearts of pastors in them and not the ones that were infected by “scarlet fever.” (See my posts in the "How NOT to Have Vocations thread for details.)
Secondly my diocese has a new bishop who is extremely humble, holy, and very accessible to everyone. He has a very intense interest in increasing vocations and a desire to better understand then men he’s going to ordain one day- so much so that he’s chosen to live at the seminary and not in the bishop’s mansion. After my friends’ ordination, I wrote a letter to the bishop explaining how I thought that it was great for him to live at the seminary and the excitement I saw in every one there at the Cathedral since his appointment. He responded back with a very cordial letter and also offered a meeting if I so choosed. I think I at least owe him that since he offered…
But the big question is that is this truly an authentic calling, a re-awakening of the one I thought I had or is this simply a reaction to some events (albeit very good ones) that are arousing some type of fond recollection of my seminary days?
As I see the many threads helping men reach a decision whether or not they’re being called to the priesthood, all of them seem to be considering entering a seminary for the first time and are having doubts about several different kinds of external as well as internal factors. And often the advice (which I admit I often give as well) to these aspirants is to at least give it a try.
However, in my case, I did give it a try and ultimately left on my own terms in after 14 months in college seminary in 2004. While I could write an entire book about what all happened there and to the events that lead to my departure, let it be suffice to say that I left not because I was sure that I didn’t have a vocation, but rather, if I did, it would be preserved for the time and circumstances that the Lord wanted to be one.
Now, as I am finally entering in my last year of undergraduate studies I am looking forward to start building a career and a life away from living with my parents, up to and including potentially attending law school. At this time, the thought of re-entering seminary never occurred to me as a real possibility at least not now.) However, it seems the more I think like this, the more the idea of priesthood (and gasp, the idea of going back to same diocese) sometimes in spite of myself. For example, in May, I went to my friend’s diaconate ordination. While I was at the reception, I ran across my old spiritual director from seminary and asked if I considered returning. I politely said that I was keeping all options open but wasn’t sure about the calling - to which he replied “I always thought you were called.” At even more so, everybody, it seems, that I run across, including non-Catholics, are wanting to know if I’m considering returning.
I should also point out two unique events that are in the process of becoming reality. First, the seminary faculty (including the Rector with whom I had no confidence in when I was there) have all been re-assigned and are being replaced by quality priests with the hearts of pastors in them and not the ones that were infected by “scarlet fever.” (See my posts in the "How NOT to Have Vocations thread for details.)
Secondly my diocese has a new bishop who is extremely humble, holy, and very accessible to everyone. He has a very intense interest in increasing vocations and a desire to better understand then men he’s going to ordain one day- so much so that he’s chosen to live at the seminary and not in the bishop’s mansion. After my friends’ ordination, I wrote a letter to the bishop explaining how I thought that it was great for him to live at the seminary and the excitement I saw in every one there at the Cathedral since his appointment. He responded back with a very cordial letter and also offered a meeting if I so choosed. I think I at least owe him that since he offered…
But the big question is that is this truly an authentic calling, a re-awakening of the one I thought I had or is this simply a reaction to some events (albeit very good ones) that are arousing some type of fond recollection of my seminary days?