Saints with Abrasive Personalities

[holyrood]

In reading the lives of the Saints, there are some who are said to be gruff, blunt, irritable, and other things we would generally regard as negative or not necessarily nice ways to treat other people.

What does this mean, spiritually and theologically?

That there’s a time and place for such things (after all, Jesus got angry in the temple), or that even the Saints had things to overcome?

I ask because yesterday I was quite angry with someone. I spoke strongly. There were times I could have tweaked my words more gently, but everything I said was true. I even believe they were things this person needs to see…but of course, that doesn’t mean it was necessarily wise or helpful for me to say it, at that time, in that way. It’s someone very close to me, by the way, and issues that directly affected me, not an acquaintance I just decided to set straight.

 

[TK421]

Jesus was abrasive also.

Or at least, it really depends on who you ask. From a secular/pagan/morally liberal point of view, every and any saint is going to be perceived as abrasive and intrusive. Even a conventional “softie” like St Francis, with his more jovial personality, is going to be abrasive when he needs to be. From another person’s point of view, they’re wonderful and sweet. There’s a reason Christians have the reputation that they do.

 

[glendab]

Human emotions aren’t sinful. What we do with them sometimes is. Know the difference.

Glenda

 

[marymary1975]

I think the problem here is that there is a huge misconception today that loving others and be charitative means condoning behaviors, accepting everything and either lying or coveting the truth to others to make them happy. That is not true.many saints were blunt because they would tell the truth and many people don’t like to hear the truth. Remember Jesus is love but he is also justice together woth righteousness, And there is a middle point between both that many fail to see. Some saints were very strict and many think that the fact that they were strict means they were not that charitable. Not true as you have to be strict sometimes you just have to be able to find that middle point in which you ate being strict, telling the truth but at the same time without being offensive to anyone.

 

[St_Francis]

I have to admit my priest told me that expressing anger can be a sign of pride or be a self-indulgent thing to do.

Sigh…

The thing is, I can say St Nicholas punched Arius in the nose (Yes!!!) but… am I as saintly as St Nicholas? Can I be that sure of my motive? Well, in some situations, yes, like defending someone or myself and the like. But otherwise, just because something is true and/or needs to be said doesn’t mean that I’m not being prideful or self-indulgent *if I express it angrily. *I may need to not be the one to say it, or I may need to say it without giving in to the “pleasure” of saying it angrily.

So, not commenting on what you did, but sharing some of what I need to use to evaluate, which might help you?

 

[Sarcelle]

In reading the lives of the Saints, there are some who are said to be gruff, blunt, irritable, and other things we would generally regard as negative or not necessarily nice ways to treat other people.

What does this mean, spiritually and theologically?

That there’s a time and place for such things (after all, Jesus got angry in the temple), or that even the Saints had things to overcome?

I ask because yesterday I was quite angry with someone. I spoke strongly. There were times I could have tweaked my words more gently, but everything I said was true. I even believe they were things this person needs to see…but of course, that doesn’t mean it was necessarily wise or helpful for me to say it, at that time, in that way. It’s someone very close to me, by the way, and issues that directly affected me, not an acquaintance I just decided to set straight.

I have heard and read a lot of stories about Padre Pio that may he indicate he could be one of these.

 

[Sarcelle]

Jesus was abrasive also.

Or at least, it really depends on who you ask. From a secular/pagan/morally liberal point of view, every and any saint is going to be perceived as abrasive and intrusive. Even a conventional “softie” like St Francis, with his more jovial personality, is going to be abrasive when he needs to be. From another person’s point of view, they’re wonderful and sweet. There’s a reason Christians have the reputation that they do.

One thing I noticed from reading about Jesus in the Bible. He weeps, he gets mad, he gets filled with pity, grief. He feeds people, he eats and drinks maybe even laughs. . Pretty much demonstrates a lot of human emotions, bur one thing that he never seems to do is sneering or talking down to people.

 

[marymary1975]

I have heard and read a lot of stories about Padre Pio that may he indicate he could be one of these.

True, padre pio and also the holy priest of Ars was very blunt and straight forward including with Maximus from LA Salette. But they also never put people down or used offensive wording. The holy priest of Ars was quite a good example of how you can tell things straight out without personally offending someone.

 

[Brigid34]

Other ones are St. Jerome and I’ve heard that no one wanted to be around St.Benedict (not the pope)

 

[celtspirit]

See what david said to Goliath as he was about to slay him:thumbsup:

 

[iamcatholic100]

Abrasive personalities aside, the reason why certain saints speak in very blunt terms is because other peoples’ eternal souls are at stake. They were fulfilling the central mission of the church, which is the salvation of souls.