School bulies

[chevalier]

There’s a name for male-against-female bullying: it’s called "sexual harassment."

It has to involve sex to be sexual.

 

[havana1]

It has to involve sex to be sexual.

Um…not exactly.

The original poster states, “[The bully] is very aggressive and physical–hitting, shoving them into things, as well as being verbally agressive to both classmates, teachers, and the principal. His aggressive behavior is almost a daily occurrence, from what I have been told.”

Are you saying that hitting and shoving don’t make for a “hostile environment”? Original poster is describing textbook sexual harassment: hostile school environment is just as much sexual harassment as a hostile workplace environment. See Title IX of the Education Amendments of 1972 (Title IX). It applies here.

 

[Mary_Gail_36]

Um…not exactly.

The original poster states, “[The bully] is very aggressive and physical–hitting, shoving them into things, as well as being verbally agressive to both classmates, teachers, and the principal. His aggressive behavior is almost a daily occurrence, from what I have been told.”

Are you saying that hitting and shoving don’t make for a “hostile environment”? Original poster is describing textbook sexual harassment: hostile school environment is just as much sexual harassment as a hostile workplace environment. See Title IX of the Education Amendments of 1972 (Title IX). It applies here.

I disagree and agree with Chevalier. It isn’t sexual harassment. It’s harassment and bullying…

Proof:

Not only her, but some of the other children have as well.

He isn’t just mistreating the girls. Also sexual harassment has to be sexual in nature. Hence the name.

 

[Joseph629]

Well weither you ment disrespect or not it is irrelevant and a bit spiteful to say. Many families cannot homeschool for various reasons.

AND homeschool children are no angels either. They bully (even physically) just like any other kids

Purplesunshine, I think you mis-understood me. What I was trying to say, was that I’m grateful to God, for having given 'ME" the opportunity to put “MY” children in a situation where they haven’t had to put up with any bullying for over 20+ years. In fact this thread has been an eye opener for me, and I’m always thankful to God for teaching me what other people have to go through. My apologies for not being clearer. I have the greatest respect for my Catholic brethren no matter what their blessings, OR their choices in life, whether voluntary or involuntary. God has blessed us all in very many different ways. Where I consider myself blessed to have been able to be at home with my children, I’m sure most of you are blessed with much better health than I, and can likely provide for your children in many ways than I cannot. May God continue to bless us all in whichever way He so choses, and may we accept those areas that we are NOT blessed (of which I have many), but am totally accepting.

 

[purplesunshine]

Purplesunshine, I think you mis-understood me. What I was trying to say, was that I’m grateful to God, for having given 'ME" the opportunity to put “MY” children in a situation where they haven’t had to put up with any bullying for over 20+ years. In fact this thread has been an eye opener for me, and I’m always thankful to God for teaching me what other people have to go through. My apologies for not being clearer. I have the greatest respect for my Catholic brethren no matter what their blessings, OR their choices in life, whether voluntary or involuntary. God has blessed us all in very many different ways. Where I consider myself blessed to have been able to be at home with my children, I’m sure most of you are blessed with much better health than I, and can likely provide for your children in many ways than I cannot. May God continue to bless us all in whichever way He so choses, and may we accept those areas that we are NOT blessed (of which I have many), but am totally accepting.

Weither or not you intended to hurt, you did. Its like going to a thread about children with special needs and saying that your kids are all perfect. Can you see now how that would sting.

Secondly. There are homeschool bullies, its a fact of life especally in the 9-15yo crowd. Both my brothers and I faced far worse bullies in HS than in public school. These bullies were especially cunning beucase they knew the “goodie-two-shoes” standard of HS kids. HS parents often don’t think their child will be bullied simply because they are HS’ing. HS kids are often reluctant to report bullying to parents since outings are a treat and not a given.
This can be verbal harassment or manipulation (a favorite among girls) or physical bullying. My brothers and I were teased because we were not “pure” homeschoolers…we’d been to public school. We were teased becuase we were from the country (from the city hs’ers) We were teased because of our religion. (Catholics were not the predominant religious group). To this day I think that our parents (especially dad) don’t think it happened, or that it was as bad as we say. My brothers got towel-whipped after swimming and swirlies in park toilets. All by homeschoolers.
As homeschooling grows so will things like this. I’m not saying that public/private school isn’t worse. I’m just saying that bullying is something that happens to all children in every walk of life and hs children are NOT immune.

 

[Joseph629]

I’m just saying that bullying is something that happens to all children in every walk of life and hs children are NOT immune.

You’re absolutely right, I agree with you. Thank you.

 

[FiberZilla]

My 2nd grade grandaughter has been experiencing some bullying from a boy in her class. Not only her, but some of the other children have as well. He is very aggressive and physical–hitting, shoving them into things, as well as being verbally agressive to both classmates, teachers, and the principal. His aggressive behavior is almost a daily occurrence, from what I have been told.

The school has been proactive in their approach to bullying, they had an evening for parents and students discussing this subject, and have tried to intervene in this child’s behavior with counseling sessions for parents and child, but it is obvious this child has a severe behavior problem. I know the school is trying to get him some professional help (according to what my daughter tells me), but he cannot be taken out of school without some long process, according to the school. What that process is, I don’t know.

My concern is what to advise my grandaughter. She has been repeatedly told to report the bullying when it occurs, but sometimes is afraid to, and will let it go a day or two before telling her parents that he elbowed her in the stomach or punched her. She says she is afraid she will get in trouble, although she has been told by both parents and school staff that she will not. I don’t know if he is threatening her not to tell or what. In any case, when the behavior is reported, the child is removed to the classroom and taken to the principal’s office, but nothing changes, he is right back at it.

Now I am sure that many will see this as inappropriate, but my instinct is to tell her to defend herself and punch him back and mean it. She is capable physically of doing this, having well developed muscles from being on a swim team. The reason I say this is that I experienced this as a child myself from a certain girl at school, and and one day I had enough and threw a punch back and after a few minutes of scrapping, that ended the problem. Her mother also experienced this when she was about 10 yrs old with a neighborhood boy, and defended herself and that was the last of that. She came home with her shirt torn, and rather dirty, but he never went near her again. I am not a violent person and do not like fighting one bit, but somehow, given the fact that no one else has been able to deal with this child, I think my grandaughter should feel free to defend herself at least. Am I “all wet” here? I don’t want her to grow up fighting, but I also don’t want her to grow up thinking she has to accept being punched and hit. Her parents have expressed the same thoughts I have, but we are uncertain about the ramifications. This has been going on since school started. Does anyone have any thoughts on this? Or any experience? I do think the school is doing all they legally can at this point and they have been very willing to meet and discuss things with the parents who have complained, but they say they cannot remove the child from the school the child at this point.

Put the school on notice. Your granddaghter is being physically abused by this little monster and that they are responsibile to put an immediate stop to it. Send it certfied mail and CC to your attorney. Explain that if the assaults continue, law enforcement will be made aware of the situation and your granddaughter will be instructed to defend herself and if the school punishes her for defending herself (or is she is injured as a result of not being allowed to defend herself) you will persue legal action. There is nothing more disruptive to her ability to learn than fear for her safety. Zero tolerance!