Screen Sucking on CA

[EasterJoy]

As my number of posts ought to make obvious (since I will admit that I am no longer stuck with doctor’s orders to do essentially nothing), I have a terrible habit of what Ed Hallowell called “screen sucking” in his book, Crazy Busy. I just spend too much time here.

Is it hopeless to think I can limit this, or should I just swear off entirely?

How do you limit your time online?

 

[Cupofkindness]

How much does CAF help your prayer life? For me, not at all. Does posting here make you a better person or help you help real people in your real life? For me, not so much. It’s best to avoid sites like CAF, because forums always pull you back in. Over and over again. I have found that unless I have a specific problem that I need guidance on, I spend too much time here. I always enjoy your writing, and also The RealJuliane’s posts too. I do pray for the problems people discuss on this forum. Many sad situations in need of God’s grace. As for me, I think I will “swear off” CAF for the time being. Thanks for the inspiration, Easter Joy and perhaps you can let go of CAF for the second half of Lent!

 

[EasterJoy]

I have learned to think about things from more different perspectives and to be somewhat less rash in my judgements of other people, but on the whole, I think you’re right. There are better things to do with my time.

 

[Dakota_Roberts]

You might be able to ask the staff to ban you for a month, since you woouldn’t be able to post for a month it should make you find something else to do.

 

[EasterJoy]

You might be able to ask the staff to ban you for a month, since you woouldn’t be able to post for a month it should make you find something else to do.

I was off for a year, then re-started with a different name. It isn’t that I can’t find other things to do. I can. It is just that once I get started here, I get a bit too interested in how a conversation is going, so I log in too often and take too much time in replies. Maybe I just don’t get out enough with real people!

I have a PhD, but I’m a stay-at-home mom. It works out well for our family, the kids and my husband are glad I don’t have an outside job, I don’t mind doing housework and getting the kids to baseball and being here for when the furnace needs fixing (or whatever) instead of teaching, but I think I need to find somewhere to use my brain a bit more.

 

[Irishmom2]

As my number of posts ought to make obvious (since I will admit that I am no longer stuck with doctor’s orders to do essentially nothing), I have a terrible habit of what Ed Hallowell called “screen sucking” in his book, Crazy Busy. I just spend too much time here.

Is it hopeless to think I can limit this, or should I just swear off entirely?

How do you limit your time online?

I think the limit will come when you find something else to do. Whether that is a hobby, or laundry or whatever. It is easy to spend lots of time here. But I think that it is not hopeless to think you can limit it. Just not too much, because I too would miss your great, insightful posts as well.

 

[EasterJoy]

I think the limit will come when you find something else to do. Whether that is a hobby, or laundry or whatever. It is easy to spend lots of time here. But I think that it is not hopeless to think you can limit it. Just not too much, because I too would miss your great, insightful posts as well.

Laundry has a hard time competing!
(Books on tape do make folding clothes much more attractive!)

 

[Dakota_Roberts]

I was off for a year, then re-started with a different name. It isn’t that I can’t find other things to do. I can. It is just that once I get started here, I get a bit too interested in how a conversation is going, so I log in too often and take too much time in replies. Maybe I just don’t get out enough with real people!

I have a PhD, but I’m a stay-at-home mom. It works out well for our family, the kids and my husband are glad I don’t have an outside job, I don’t mind doing housework and getting the kids to baseball and being here for when the furnace needs fixing (or whatever) instead of teaching, but I think I need to find somewhere to use my brain a bit more.

I’ve always found your posts quite thoughtful so there is an upside to putting a bit of work in to your posts

If you don’t mind me asking, what did you get your PhD in? I think the problem is that you are desperately trying to find intellectual stimulation and you aren’t finding it as a stay at home mother.

 

[28562]

Don’t leave. I can honestly say that I appreciate your posts, as well as the posts of many others.

You may think that you are being unproductive, but you don’t know the effect you may be having on other members. I can honestly say that since I found and joined this forum about a month ago, I have become a better man, better husband, and better Catholic. It’s at least partially because of some of you on here.

I guess I am being selfish, but I still have a lot to learn and I am looking forward to doing so. You have a lot of knowledge that you would be taking away from this place, which has been a blessing to me, and I am sure many others.

 

[Irishmom2]

Don’t leave. I can honestly say that I appreciate your posts, as well as the posts of many others.

You may think that you are being unproductive, but you don’t know the effect you may be having on other members. I can honestly say that since I found and joined this forum about a month ago, I have become a better man, better husband, and better Catholic. It’s at least partially because of some of you on here.

This is absolutely true. I believe there are many people that lurk and never post, and you will never know whose lives you touch by something you say.

 

[EasterJoy]

I’ve always found your posts quite thoughtful so there is an upside to putting a bit of work in to your posts

If you don’t mind me asking, what did you get your PhD in? I think the problem is that you are desperately trying to find intellectual stimulation and you aren’t finding it as a stay at home mother.

Inorganic chemistry. I thought seriously about becoming a physician, nearly went to physical therapy school, and my high school interest inventory said I would have made a good cartographer (probably true, as I love maps). I could have easily majored in any number of things and could have happily worked in any number of field. I’m just interested in lots of stuff! Still, when I was in graduate school, I will be honest and say that the scientists interested me more than the science. I liked tutoring much more than the “thrill” of research, too.

One of the reasons I did not get a job and go back to work as our kids got older was that my MIL lived with us, and I wanted to be available if she needed care in our home, which she did for a short time before she died. Instead, I did volunteer work, which was easier to vary in when I worked, and how much. (Volunteer organizations are far less picky than employers that way!! )

Now my own parents are starting to fail, so being available to help my siblings with that is starting to be a good thing, too. Besides, my husband works varied hours, not to mention too many of them, so it works out for us to have me more flexible. Considering that my teaching jobs were not very lucrative, I don’t know that it would make us any money, if I were to go back to teaching.

It’s not time to get a job, but it is time to start thinking about what I may want to do besides be available when someone needs to be driven somewhere.

 

[happymommy]

I find that I do better in real life when I limit my time on CAF! The more time I’m on here the more upset I get…and I have trouble letting it go. I’ve found that I doubt my faith more if I go on the “deeper” threads and forums of CAF too. It’s funny, my husband told me about it because he thought it would be good for me…not too many Catholic friends. He thought it would be good to be able to read and post about Catholic living and family…Hasn’t worked out that way. I’ve made some dear friends on here and I would miss them if I were to leave, but I’ve often thought about just walking away.

 

[EasterJoy]

I find that I do better in real life when I limit my time on CAF! The more time I’m on here the more upset I get…and I have trouble letting it go. I’ve found that I doubt my faith more if I go on the “deeper” threads and forums of CAF too. It’s funny, my husband told me about it because he thought it would be good for me…not too many Catholic friends. He thought it would be good to be able to read and post about Catholic living and family…Hasn’t worked out that way. I’ve made some dear friends on here and I would miss them if I were to leave, but I’ve often thought about just walking away.

Just as an experiment, I’m going to leave this thread alone for 24 hours, instead of checking in on it every 20 minutes!!

(Wish me luck!! )

 

[Dakota_Roberts]

Inorganic chemistry. I thought seriously about becoming a physician, nearly went to physical therapy school, and my high school interest inventory said I would have made a good cartographer (probably true, as I love maps). I could have easily majored in any number of things and could have happily worked in any number of field. I’m just interested in lots of stuff! Still, when I was in graduate school, I will be honest and say that the scientists interested me more than the science. I liked tutoring much more than the “thrill” of research, too.

One of the reasons I did not get a job and go back to work as our kids got older was that my MIL lived with us, and I wanted to be available if she needed care in our home, which she did for a short time before she died. Instead, I did volunteer work, which was easier to vary in when I worked, and how much. (Volunteer organizations are far less picky than employers that way!! )

Now my own parents are starting to fail, so being available to help my siblings with that is starting to be a good thing, too. Besides, my husband works varied hours, not to mention too many of them, so it works out for us to have me more flexible. Considering that my teaching jobs were not very lucrative, I don’t know that it would make us any money, if I were to go back to teaching.

It’s not time to get a job, but it is time to start thinking about what I may want to do besides be available when someone needs to be driven somewhere.

How about a book club?

 

[happymommy]

Just as an experiment, I’m going to leave this thread alone for 24 hours, instead of checking in on it every 20 minutes!!

(Wish me luck!! )

 

[EasterJoy]

OK, so it took me a bit to kick myself off, then I was off for a day.

I just need to limit when I log on, and mostly accept that I’m not going to be able to carry on “conversations” here. That is what really sucks the time.

If I can’t do that, I need to quit, but it is worth a try, because I do enjoy the people here, I do learn some things, I do find some inspiration, and every once in awhile, people say they find some good stuff coming from me. I’ll just have to see if I can enjoy it in more moderate portions!

Thanks for your help!

 

[happymommy]

Why don’t you try setting a timer? 15,20 or 30 mins. whatever amount you feel would work. Then when it beeps, times up! You could do this maybe a couple of times a day, morning and evening and still get your CAF “fix” without spending too much time on here.

 

[EasterJoy]

Why don’t you try setting a timer? 15,20 or 30 mins. whatever amount you feel would work. Then when it beeps, times up! You could do this maybe a couple of times a day, morning and evening and still get your CAF “fix” without spending too much time on here.

I have tried this without much luck. I think I need to get on when I have some pressing thing that will push me off! Or maybe I just need to schedule myself more and impress upon myself how little “disposable” time I have!!!

Speaking of, I need to get off now!

 

[TheRealJuliane]

Inorganic chemistry. I thought seriously about becoming a physician, nearly went to physical therapy school, and my high school interest inventory said I would have made a good cartographer (probably true, as I love maps). I could have easily majored in any number of things and could have happily worked in any number of field. I’m just interested in lots of stuff! Still, when I was in graduate school, I will be honest and say that the scientists interested me more than the science. I liked tutoring much more than the “thrill” of research, too.

One of the reasons I did not get a job and go back to work as our kids got older was that my MIL lived with us, and I wanted to be available if she needed care in our home, which she did for a short time before she died. Instead, I did volunteer work, which was easier to vary in when I worked, and how much. (Volunteer organizations are far less picky than employers that way!! )

Now my own parents are starting to fail, so being available to help my siblings with that is starting to be a good thing, too. Besides, my husband works varied hours, not to mention too many of them, so it works out for us to have me more flexible. Considering that my teaching jobs were not very lucrative, I don’t know that it would make us any money, if I were to go back to teaching.

It’s not time to get a job, but it is time to start thinking about what I may want to do besides be available when someone needs to be driven somewhere.

Other than not having an advanced degree, I am in a similar stage of life. I gave up work when our first son was born; he will be 21 in May. I have done a little substitute teaching in the schools our sons attended, and that was fun, but as you say, the little bit of money one makes is not worth the time spent away from the house and kids. There has never been a time when my husband was available to help with all the running around and child-rearing duties.

I never used my degree but it’s in English anyway. I used to write a little bit but wasn’t that good, and anyway I poured all my creativity into the kids, into giving them the opportunities to discover what their gifts were.

Anyway, there I go again, making a thread all about me!

I never intended to get so into this forum. I wanted to learn more about my faith, and get some support in my then-crumbling marriage. But now it is a huge part of my day. I also look forward to your responses, you are always kind and charitable and quite astute in your observations. I think both of us need to get some kind of intellectual pursuit going though. This forum does take me away from things I need to do, so it qualifies as an addiction in some criteria.

I’ve actually thought seriously about going into the field of counseling since I want to help others so much…but I don’t want to try and take a GRE after 20 years out of college. And, is that really a gift or is it just co-dependency?

 

[EasterJoy]

Other than not having an advanced degree, I am in a similar stage of life. I gave up work when our first son was born; he will be 21 in May. I have done a little substitute teaching in the schools our sons attended, and that was fun, but as you say, the little bit of money one makes is not worth the time spent away from the house and kids. There has never been a time when my husband was available to help with all the running around and child-rearing duties.

I never used my degree but it’s in English anyway. I used to write a little bit but wasn’t that good, and anyway I poured all my creativity into the kids, into giving them the opportunities to discover what their gifts were.

Anyway, there I go again, making a thread all about me!

I never intended to get so into this forum. I wanted to learn more about my faith, and get some support in my then-crumbling marriage. But now it is a huge part of my day. I also look forward to your responses, you are always kind and charitable and quite astute in your observations. I think both of us need to get some kind of intellectual pursuit going though. This forum does take me away from things I need to do, so it qualifies as an addiction in some criteria.

I’ve actually thought seriously about going into the field of counseling since I want to help others so much…but I don’t want to try and take a GRE after 20 years out of college. And, is that really a gift or is it just co-dependency?

The thread can be about you, too. That’s fine.

I’m confused about what to do next, too, although my husband has been telling me that I am discounting the things I do in real life too much…things that the kids need and that he can’t do, because he has a nutty schedule. I don’t get much done, but I keep my schedule flexible, and so when someone needs to step in, I often can.

I like your responses, too. I like you. I just don’t know, though. I have tried to balance this in, but I have never succeeded. If I stay off this site, I do waste time on the computer elsewhere, but not nearly as much. OTOH, I cannot say that I do much good anywhere else, either.

I think I’m kidding myself. Whatever I need to do, I need to do a lot less here. I just do. If I can’t manage to do a lot less here than I do, I need to just quit entirely.

Pffff. I would miss you, though.