Scruples are making me miserable! DID I commit a sin?!

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Emily91

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I have scruples. Bad. So here’s what I’m struggling with today:
I saw someone on Facebook mention the woody Allen scandal, and I wasn’t sure what the full story was there, so I googled it, saw that his daughter had written an open letter describing how he had sexually abused her, and I chose to read it. Call it morbid curiosity for the gruesome details. I wasn’t looking to get aroused by reading it, it was about abuse for goodness sake. But my curiosity was excited and I wanted I know exactly what had happened. Now I feel incredibly guilty. I know deep down that reading a news story, even a bad one, technically isn’t a sin, but somehow I feel as if Ive sinned greatly for being so curious about all the details, and seeking to satisfy my curiosity.
 
Emily91 said:
I have scruples. Bad. So here’s what I’m struggling with today:
I saw someone on Facebook mention the woody Allen scandal, and I wasn’t sure what the full story was there, so I googled it, saw that his daughter had written an open letter describing how he had sexually abused her, and I chose to read it. Call it morbid curiosity for the gruesome details. I wasn’t looking to get aroused by reading it, it was about abuse for goodness sake. But my curiosity was excited and I wanted I know exactly what had happened. Now I feel incredibly guilty. I know deep down that reading a news story, even a bad one, technically isn’t a sin, but somehow I feel as if Ive sinned greatly for being so curious about all the details, and seeking to satisfy my curiosity.
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Depends on whether the curiosity was based on desire for facts or desire for arousal.
 
Emily91 said:
I have scruples. Bad. So here’s what I’m struggling with today:
I saw someone on Facebook mention the woody Allen scandal, and I wasn’t sure what the full story was there, so I googled it, saw that his daughter had written an open letter describing how he had sexually abused her, and I chose to read it. Call it morbid curiosity for the gruesome details. I wasn’t looking to get aroused by reading it, it was about abuse for goodness sake. But my curiosity was excited and I wanted I know exactly what had happened. Now I feel incredibly guilty. I know deep down that reading a news story, even a bad one, technically isn’t a sin, but somehow I feel as if Ive sinned greatly for being so curious about all the details, and seeking to satisfy my curiosity.
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Why would you obsess and worry that every little decision you make might be a sin? You will drive yourself crazy with such guilt. You cannot function as a normal human analyzing every minor decision you make to possible sinfulness. Imagine going through a day wondering if its a sin to eat too much, look at a sexy advertising billboard, disagree with a Catholic teaching…and on and on. The Church uses guilt to manipulate and control.
 
moondawg said:
Why would you obsess and worry that every little decision you make might be a sin? You will drive yourself crazy with such guilt. You cannot function as a normal human analyzing every minor decision you make to possible sinfulness. Imagine going through a day wondering if its a sin to eat too much, look at a sexy advertising billboard, disagree with a Catholic teaching…and on and on. The Church uses guilt to manipulate and control.
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Nope.
Well, I agreed up until that last line. NO, the Church is NOT that scrupulous, and does NOT want you to obsess over it.
 
moondawg said:
Why would you obsess and worry that every little decision you make might be a sin? You will drive yourself crazy with such guilt. You cannot function as a normal human analyzing every minor decision you make to possible sinfulness. Imagine going through a day wondering if its a sin to eat too much, look at a sexy advertising billboard, disagree with a Catholic teaching…and on and on. The Church uses guilt to manipulate and control.
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Ah! Tell me master theologian, how much you know about the church and our beliefs better than us poor, poor, Catholic peasants. :rolleyes:
To the OP; I would at least seek out counseling for this ‘curiosity.’ As to who and where? I am not educated enough on the subject to answer that.
 
moondawg said:
Why would you obsess and worry that every little decision you make might be a sin? You will drive yourself crazy with such guilt. You cannot function as a normal human analyzing every minor decision you make to possible sinfulness. Imagine going through a day wondering if its a sin to eat too much, look at a sexy advertising billboard, disagree with a Catholic teaching…and on and on. The Church uses guilt to manipulate and control.
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Wow, your answer sure sounds a lot like the logic used by the serpent in the Garden.
 
Emily, scrupulosity is a type of OC syndrome. It causes one to preseverate on every aspect of life to such an extent that one is unable to live. Definitely speak to a priest, but also seek psychiatric help.
 
People with scruples cannot commit mortal sins because their conscience is so tender. For example, they might be walking on a sidewalk when the rhyme “Step on a crack and break your mother’s back” comes to mind. They start obsessing about it and eventually are sure that they have committed the sin of murder. Such people need to choose one confessor to go to and only go to him and follow his instructions about the frequency of confession.

There is a Catholic Answers group for those suffering with scruples which could be helpful: forums.catholic-questions.org/group.php?groupid=454
 
Emily91 said:
I have scruples. Bad. So here’s what I’m struggling with today:
I saw someone on Facebook mention the woody Allen scandal, and I wasn’t sure what the full story was there, so I googled it, saw that his daughter had written an open letter describing how he had sexually abused her, and I chose to read it. Call it morbid curiosity for the gruesome details. I wasn’t looking to get aroused by reading it, it was about abuse for goodness sake. But my curiosity was excited and I wanted I know exactly what had happened. Now I feel incredibly guilty. I know deep down that reading a news story, even a bad one, technically isn’t a sin, but somehow I feel as if Ive sinned greatly for being so curious about all the details, and seeking to satisfy my curiosity.
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Read again last Sunday’s Gospel:

When the Pharisees heard that Jesus had silenced the Sadducees,
they gathered together, and one of them,
a scholar of the law tested him by asking,
“Teacher, which commandment in the law is the greatest?”
He said to him,
“You shall love the Lord, your God,
with all your heart,
with all your soul,
and with all your mind.
This is the greatest and the first commandment.
The second is like it:
You shall love your neighbor as yourself.
The whole law and the prophets depend on these two commandments.” (Mt 22:34-40)

Again: “‘You shall love the Lord, your God, with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind. This is the greatest and the first commandment.’”

Ask yourself: “Is it out of love of God that I dwell wastefully and pointlessly over my own sinfulness?” Yes, it was probably venial sin that led you to read the article, but there is hope and peace in God’s self-sacrifice for our redemption. Which would the Devil get more pleasure out of: a Christian that sinned but afterward increased in love of God because he/she is reminded that God suffered and died in part for this sin, or a Christian that sinned and then allowed the memory of the sin to pull him or her still further away from his or her Christian purpose?

Hate to say it, but you were born in a state of original sin, were raised in a sinful world, and have yourself voluntarily and repeatedly chosen sin over God’s infinite love. Being scrupulous in a fallen world is like being a germophobe before the invention of soap. (Don’t get me wrong–the world is still beautiful and glorious. After all, it was created by God. :))
moondawg said:
The Church uses guilt to manipulate and control.
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This is one of the oldest, most popular, and most mindless criticisms of the Church–no offense. 😃 It’s also one of the most ironic. Here, finally, is an institution that claims to give its true followers once and for all total and eternal freedom from guilt, and an endless amount of its opponents have tried to make out that its goal is the exact opposite. 🤷

To Emily91: I’ll be praying for your peace of mind (and heart and soul :)).

-Greg
 
Emily91 said:
I have scruples. Bad. So here’s what I’m struggling with today:
I saw someone on Facebook mention the woody Allen scandal, and I wasn’t sure what the full story was there, so I googled it, saw that his daughter had written an open letter describing how he had sexually abused her, and I chose to read it. Call it morbid curiosity for the gruesome details. I wasn’t looking to get aroused by reading it, it was about abuse for goodness sake. But my curiosity was excited and I wanted I know exactly what had happened. Now I feel incredibly guilty. I know deep down that reading a news story, even a bad one, technically isn’t a sin, but somehow I feel as if Ive sinned greatly for being so curious about all the details, and seeking to satisfy my curiosity.
Click to expand...
The first thing is to suggest that questions of this sort should be better posed to a regular confessor but then I can understand that a site like this can be more readily accessible. No one can sin by accident, and if one must ask the question - did I sin? - it is almost certain one did not - to any grave degree. Sin is a conscious rejection of God’s will. Sufficient reflection is always an event prior to, and never after a moral decision. The question is the very definition of doubt, and for the scrupulous, doubt dispenses. It’s called the “Doubting Disease” for good reason. Now, don’t be taken too far aback by the calling of it a disease. This doesn’t mean you are a nut, just that you are not - at ease - when troubled by scrupulosity. Curiosity about facts is intellectual curiosity, without which we do not learn about life. Sexuality is part of life, and if not an interesting part of life, it wouldn’t work as God intended. The number 91 after your name suggests that you are probably young, as 1940 after mine suggests that I am old. So nip the scruple thing in the bud before it impedes your spiritual growth and the joy of life.
 
Emily91 said:
I have scruples. Bad. So here’s what I’m struggling with today:
I saw someone on Facebook mention the woody Allen scandal, and I wasn’t sure what the full story was there, so I googled it, saw that his daughter had written an open letter describing how he had sexually abused her, and I chose to read it. Call it morbid curiosity for the gruesome details. I wasn’t looking to get aroused by reading it, it was about abuse for goodness sake. But my curiosity was excited and I wanted I know exactly what had happened. Now I feel incredibly guilty. I know deep down that reading a news story, even a bad one, technically isn’t a sin, but somehow I feel as if Ive sinned greatly for being so curious about all the details, and seeking to satisfy my curiosity.
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I am not qualified to say if it’s a sin but… if you feel like it’s a sin mention it in confession and try to avoid such things in the future.

I think your learning to discern the spirits as St. Ignatius’s Rules say. This is how we grow spiritually, people places and things we once enjoyed when not paying attention to spiritual growth can have leave a bad taste. Often there is a strange thrill involved, reading about the plane crash or some other salacious gossip. Once again St. Ignatius mentioned how he loved to read wild adventure tales but felt drained and empty afterwards but reading the Bible or spiritual works was uplifting and he felt great afterwards.

Take it easy!

El Paso
 
Emily91,

I’m not sure how you think asking internet strangers about this will resolve your struggle with scruples for you. Frankly, it is likely to make things worse, since you will undoubtedly receive a wide array or responses, and those that suggest there may be sin will cause you to worry further and perhaps seem to confirm your concerns.

You need a regular confessor and to ask him any questions you have about any sins you may or may not have committed. Only a regular confessor, who has the authority to absolve sin or to instruct that there is no sin, can play this role for you.
 
Emily91 said:
I have scruples. Bad. So here’s what I’m struggling with today:
I saw someone on Facebook mention the woody Allen scandal, and I wasn’t sure what the full story was there, so I googled it, saw that his daughter had written an open letter describing how he had sexually abused her, and I chose to read it. Call it morbid curiosity for the gruesome details. I wasn’t looking to get aroused by reading it, it was about abuse for goodness sake. But my curiosity was excited and I wanted I know exactly what had happened. Now I feel incredibly guilty. I know deep down that reading a news story, even a bad one, technically isn’t a sin, but somehow I feel as if Ive sinned greatly for being so curious about all the details, and seeking to satisfy my curiosity.
Click to expand...
You need to find a spiritual counselor to discuss your problems with scruples. Reading the daughter’s story which has been out there for a while is not a sin and the details are very disturbing. You didn’t sneek someone’s private info or letter and she put this out there for the world to see. I don’t understand why you think you sinned reading an already public and published account. Maybe next time you may want to think twice about reading any story that will have abuse of this sort in it because the details of this sort of evil are upsetting and disturbing. If you are sensitive, I would stay away from these accounts but that doesn’t mean they are a sin to read, it means that one is realisitic about what may bother them.
 
underacloud said:
Emily91,

I’m not sure how you think asking internet strangers about this will resolve your struggle with scruples for you. Frankly, it is likely to make things worse, since you will undoubtedly receive a wide array or responses, and those that suggest there may be sin will cause you to worry further and perhaps seem to confirm your concerns.

You need a regular confessor and to ask him any questions you have about any sins you may or may not have committed. Only a regular confessor, who has the authority to absolve sin or to instruct that there is no sin, can play this role for you.
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Agree 100%
 
Origen52 said:
Emily, scrupulosity is a type of OC syndrome. It causes one to preseverate on every aspect of life to such an extent that one is unable to live. Definitely speak to a priest, but also seek psychiatric help.
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Psychiatric help for this?? Please, you must be kidding to recommend this.
 
moondawg said:
Psychiatric help for this?? Please, you must be kidding to recommend this.
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This is the second post in this thread where you’ve minimized the effect of scruples. Please stop – you are not helping those who suffer from this.
 
LouisH said:
**People with scruples cannot commit mortal sins because their conscience is so tender. **For example, they might be walking on a sidewalk when the rhyme “Step on a crack and break your mother’s back” comes to mind. They start obsessing about it and eventually are sure that they have committed the sin of murder. Such people need to choose one confessor to go to and only go to him and follow his instructions about the frequency of confession.

There is a Catholic Answers group for those suffering with scruples which could be helpful: forums.catholic-questions.org/group.php?groupid=454
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  1. This isn’t true… anyone can commit a mortal sin.
  2. Reading text with sexual material can be sinful, we shouldn’t assume something isn’t sinful just because a scrupulous person brought it up. People get aroused buy sexual text even if the acts are violent or whatever (I have not read 50 shades, but if I am not mistaken, it is sexual with abuse or violence in it, and we know how popular it was). People with scruples are not immune to sins.
  3. Don’t depend on the internet to help you figure out if something was sinful, especially if you have a tendency to scruples. You will find people that think non-sinful things are sinful, and people that think that things that could be sinful are not sinful. Find a good confessor and talk to him. He can help you figure out when you are sinning or not, and he can help you with your scruples.
I have seen on this site many times people announcing the have scruples and then presenting a potentially sinful situation, and then CAF people telling them it isn’t sinful, they are just being scrupulous. Find a good confessor, that is what you need :).

To OP: I am not saying you have committed a sin, but I am saying that regardless of this situation, if you suffer from scruples you need to try to find a priest that can be your regular confessor and help you have peace. God wants us to have peace, and when we are in the state of grace, there is no reason for us to not have peace. Everyone can sin, so scruples or not, regular confession is good, but it isn’t good to let scruples rob your peace.
 
I called my pastor, who I’ve talked to before about this issue, and he told me I was fine, as he almost always says. It’s such a temptation to keep dwelling on it though, but the fact that I keep questioning whether it was a sin is a sign that I need to drop it. And eventually it’ll fade, but getting on this forum and talking about it is NOT going to help the fading process, nor is anyone here my pastor/confessor. I really appreciate the help that you all have offered. However I’ve come to realize that going online for answers rather than my priest causes me only more anxiety. I need to forget, no ruminate. So, I will not be posting again.
 
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