Scrupulosity impure thoughts

[Veronica97]

Okay, I thought I had this impure thought thing down and pretty well understood when it’s not sin (just temptation), venial sin, or mortal sin. But something strange happened last night and I’m not sure how to interpret it. I awoke from a dream in which I was doing something that is terribly sinful in real life, but in the dream it was approved by the Church. But when I woke up, I was terribly confused and thought, "Wait a minute–that’s not approved by the Church–I’m in a state of sin! A few seconds later I began to realize it was only a dream and I did not commit the act in real life. But it was like I was “stunned” that I even had such a dream. I began to think back to the dream and what happened in it. I thought about it for a few seconds, but I wasn’t attracted to the sin (at least I don’t think so)–just mostly thinking about it because I felt guilty and shocked that I would even dream such a thing. Then I realized I shouldn’t think about it at all and so stopped. It’s kept popping up in my mind all day and I’m disgusted by it. My examination of conscience says that “dwelling on impure thoughts or fantasies for the purpose of arousal” is a mortal sin, while “brief entertainment of impure thoughts or fantasies” is a venial sin. I had just gone to confession the day before, received the Eucharist and prayed a rosary. I know I’m scrupulous and if I have doubts about having fully consented to thoughts, then I haven’t; still, I feel guilty. I feel almost like the devil purposely planted something in my dream so awful that I couldn’t help but think about it out of shock, amazement, and worry. How can I be sure I haven’t committed a mortal sin? I guess I’m worrying, “What if I DID enjoy the thought at first?” because in the dream it was pleasant, but in reality it is not. Even now I’m thinking, “What if I’m only fooling myself and I really did dwell on it for enjoyment?” I’m also thinking that in examining whether or not I’ve consented, I may be consenting again!

 

[MaeganFlinchum1]

To be a mortal sin it has to be DELIBERATE consent. I dont think u had that!

 

[mab23]

I think your fine because from what your stated its not intentional it was a dream, Ive had many dreams similar situations where I wake up and im still thinking about the dream and I just stop as soon as I am aware of whats going on.

I think it was just temptation which is normal - the important part is you did not act on it

kudos to you

 

[Warandpeace]

Say some prayers asking God to watch over you in your sleep:thumbsup:

 

[Veronica97]

I think your fine because from what your stated its not intentional it was a dream, Ive had many dreams similar situations where I wake up and im still thinking about the dream and I just stop as soon as I am aware of whats going on.

I think it was just temptation which is normal - the important part is you did not act on it

kudos to you

Well, at that point I was awake and realized I had only been dreaming and that what I had been dreaming about was wrong. But I still started thinking back to it b/c I was amazed that in my dream the sin was perfectly fine with the church and I was enjoying it IN THE DREAM. I think it threw me for a big loop actually. To wake up and realize, “NO, this is NOT okay with the Church.” Like WHERE DID THIS COME FROM? Like HOW would my brain even think this would be okay with the Church (or with GOD?) And how/why would I even enjoy this? I don’t think I was continuing to think about the dream for the purpose of arousal because the thought has disgusted and upset me all day. I think I was just contemplating for a few seconds what I remembered about the dream, kind of still in shock and guilt and fear. But now I’m questioning whether I may have enjoyed thinking about it slightly because of the confusing dream I had just had that made the sin seem okay or attractive. I do have ocd/scruples, so sometimes it’s hard for me to judge consent or to tell venial from mortal sin.

 

[Veronica97]

Say some prayers asking God to watch over you in your sleep:thumbsup:

Definitely. When I pray for dreams that are pure and pleasing to the Lord, this doesn’t happen. I guess I can’t forget to do this.

 

[St_Hilary]

Okay, I thought I had this impure thought thing down and pretty well understood when it’s not sin (just temptation), venial sin, or mortal sin. But something strange happened last night and I’m not sure how to interpret it. I awoke from a dream in which I was doing something that is terribly sinful in real life, but in the dream it was approved by the Church. But when I woke up, I was terribly confused and thought, "Wait a minute–that’s not approved by the Church–I’m in a state of sin! A few seconds later I began to realize it was only a dream and I did not commit the act in real life. But it was like I was “stunned” that I even had such a dream. I began to think back to the dream and what happened in it. I thought about it for a few seconds, but I wasn’t attracted to the sin (at least I don’t think so)–just mostly thinking about it because I felt guilty and shocked that I would even dream such a thing. Then I realized I shouldn’t think about it at all and so stopped. It’s kept popping up in my mind all day and I’m disgusted by it. My examination of conscience says that “dwelling on impure thoughts or fantasies for the purpose of arousal” is a mortal sin, while “brief entertainment of impure thoughts or fantasies” is a venial sin. I had just gone to confession the day before, received the Eucharist and prayed a rosary. I know I’m scrupulous and if I have doubts about having fully consented to thoughts, then I haven’t; still, I feel guilty. I feel almost like the devil purposely planted something in my dream so awful that I couldn’t help but think about it out of shock, amazement, and worry. How can I be sure I haven’t committed a mortal sin? I guess I’m worrying, “What if I DID enjoy the thought at first?” because in the dream it was pleasant, but in reality it is not. Even now I’m thinking, “What if I’m only fooling myself and I really did dwell on it for enjoyment?” I’m also thinking that in examining whether or not I’ve consented, I may be consenting again!

 

[St_Hilary]

St_Hilary:
Be at peace. If it was only a dream, great; however, if you did mentall or physically do the impure thing,. it would be a sin and would need confessing. But if only a dream, move on and God loves you.

Inn His Divine Mercy