Scrupulosity

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Athanasius

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I have had a problem with scrupulosity for the past five years, and it has been driving me crazy. However, I wish to try to learn how to overcome it to the extent possible (relying on God’s grace, of course).

Thankfully, my workplace has allowed me to take this week off for a “mental break”, I guess you could say, and they have also agreed to allow me to start working 32-hour weeks (at least for this month; at the end of the month we will see how I have progressed), in order to try to deal with this problem. Since I live with my parents, I can afford that. (I hope I’m not doing anything wrong by doing that. I feel like perhaps I don’t “need” to do this, and am therefore sinning. Am I?..But then perhaps that’s my scrupulosity).

Anyway, I wish to take this time to try to learn how to overcome not just this problem or that problem, in particular, but try to learn a way to deal with scrupulosity in general. Like I said, this week I will have a “mental break” for the most part. But when I start the 32-hour weeks, I plan on trying to ask perhaps one “major” question a week on this message board. I don’t necessarily have many “major” questions, but in trying to deal with them, it would be easier for me if I only had to worry about one a week. (It would be easier from a mental perspective of only dealing with one a week, and getting a “break” of a week in between asking questions).

Hopefully, once I get a couple of the major questions out of the way (especially ones concerning trusting my priest), I will be able to go directly to him for the rest. But I only want to try to tackle one thing at a time for now, and worry about the other stuff later.

So, for this week, I simply wish to ask: what advice can you give to someone who is scrupulous, in general? I have the book Understanding Scrupulosity, and have visited the website, but I would like some other advice? Are there any general suggestions? Thanks.
 
Everything I’ve read about scrupulosity recommends finding a good spiritual director/confessor to help you through this. St. Maximilian Kolbe experienced a bout with scrupulosity when he was young, and he got through it with the help of a confessor. His experience gave him special insight and understanding when dealing with people in the confessional who suffered from this. Ask him for his prayers and help, and for God to lead you to a good spiritual director.
 
Thank-you for your advice…Unfortunately, I don’t know where to turn for a good spiritual director…I would appreciate any prayers in this regard…
 
Also, to expand on first post a little:

Even if I don’t simply “trust my priest”, and instead go through with the plan (and work schedule) I described above, I’m not sinning, am I?

In fact, I was planning on asking my first question on this message board precisely about “trusting my priest”, listing all the relevant factors I can think of. However, I was wishing to wait till Friday of next week (not this Friday) to do that. Hopefully then afterwards once I get that question answered, then I could take the other questions straight to him and not be concerned.

I know I have been told by others to “trust my priest”. But there are other factors I wish to make sure I explain first about trusting my priest. Then, after explaining those factors, if I’m still told I can trust my priest, I will feel much better doing so.

However, I don’t even want to try to think about asking that stuff until Firday of next week. I wish to take a “mental break” this week, and then next week work 32 hours and then ask my “trusting my priest” question on Friday of next week.

I do, however, wish to make sure I am not sinning by doing it this way. I wish to make sure that in the meantime it will be all right for me to continue to do what my workplace says I could do (since I explained to my workplace my plan, the same one listed up above in my first post in this thread), and that I’m not sinning by doing so. I wish to make sure I don’t need to go to work this week anyway (instead of taking a “mental break”) and cancel my plans for a 32 hour week next week.

That’s the last thing I want to have to worry about…I would feel much more comfortable doing my original plan.
 
If you can’t find a spiritual director, what about looking for a Catholic mental health worker who could help you through your issues?
 
Oh yeah - it’s ok to take time off of work to address mental health issues. They want/deserve employees who are in their best physical/mental/emotional shape.
 
Dear Athanasius,

I share your struggle with scrupulosity, and know how much of a cross it is. The book you are reading will give you all the “practical” advice you need on overcoming scrupulosity, so I’ll tell you some spiritual advice that has helped me greatly.
  1. A strong devotion to St. Alphonsus Liguori is a must. He struggled with scrupulosity and is very powerful in interceeding. Pray to him daily.
  2. Every morning when you wake, say 3 Ave’s and commend your entire body and soul to the Blessed Virgin for that day. Before you go to bed each night, do the same thing (except commend yourself to her for the night, not day).
Be faithful, and you will see improvement.

God bless you.
 
I would just add one more thing to the previous posters advice: learn more about the Divine Mercy. This has helped me tremendously in my struggles, too.
 
mommyof4 said:
Oh yeah - it’s ok to take time off of work to address mental health issues. They want/deserve employees who are in their best physical/mental/emotional shape.
Click to expand...
Until they get tired of it and fire you like what happened to me. I was a shop manager and lead painter until they found a replacement because of time missed. Tim
 
Athanasius said:
Thank-you for your advice…Unfortunately, I don’t know where to turn for a good spiritual director…I would appreciate any prayers in this regard…
Click to expand...
You sound hesitant to go to your parish priest, although your previous posts mention that you had been speaking to him about this. That’s fine–but can you at least ask him to refer you to someone who can, or who can lead you to help?

Pick up the phone and start calling your diocese…go online & see where to start. Not emailing; you don’t have time to wait around for emails to get forwarded & replied to. Start calling today.

I think you’d do best to pour all of your energy into finding a spiritual director for this issue, and not posting scrupulous questions on this board.

Here is Scrupulus Anonymous’s newsletter entiltled, "Should I Seek Outside Help." Here is the newsletter entitled, "Trust Your Confessor."
Here’s SA’s newsletter archive.

Since that published by Liguori Publications, why not call them for advice on how to find a spiritual director in your diocese? 800-325-9521, 7a-6p, CST. You never know until you ask.

Once you start dialing & talking to people, you’ll get on a roll & that much closer to your goal of seeking help. You can do it! 👍
 
Athanasius said:
I have had a problem with scrupulosity for the past five years, and it has been driving me crazy. However, I wish to try to learn how to overcome it to the extent possible (relying on God’s grace, of course).

Thankfully, my workplace has allowed me to take this week off for a “mental break”, I guess you could say, and they have also agreed to allow me to start working 32-hour weeks (at least for this month; at the end of the month we will see how I have progressed), in order to try to deal with this problem. Since I live with my parents, I can afford that. (I hope I’m not doing anything wrong by doing that. I feel like perhaps I don’t “need” to do this, and am therefore sinning. Am I?..But then perhaps that’s my scrupulosity).

Anyway, I wish to take this time to try to learn how to overcome not just this problem or that problem, in particular, but try to learn a way to deal with scrupulosity in general. Like I said, this week I will have a “mental break” for the most part. But when I start the 32-hour weeks, I plan on trying to ask perhaps one “major” question a week on this message board. I don’t necessarily have many “major” questions, but in trying to deal with them, it would be easier for me if I only had to worry about one a week. (It would be easier from a mental perspective of only dealing with one a week, and getting a “break” of a week in between asking questions).

Hopefully, once I get a couple of the major questions out of the way (especially ones concerning trusting my priest), I will be able to go directly to him for the rest. But I only want to try to tackle one thing at a time for now, and worry about the other stuff later.

So, for this week, I simply wish to ask: what advice can you give to someone who is scrupulous, in general? I have the book Understanding Scrupulosity, and have visited the website, but I would like some other advice? Are there any general suggestions? Thanks.
Click to expand...
Hello Athanasius,
It is difficult and should be avoided, the diagnosing on line. However I might ask you a question or maybe even several questions which might help. When did it begin. Exactly, when? Usually thisdoubting disease is precipitated by a “moral crisis”
Secondly I firmly believe that underpinning scrupulosity are fear/terror of God and raw “garden of eden” type pride. I say this respectly and not as a judgement.
In my work I have encountered scrupulosity and have dealt successfully with it, but it is long term process and definitely not a process to be undergone on ones own.
May Yahweh Bless and Keep you.
Grace Angel.
 
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