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TheCrabNebula
Guest
I’m pretty sure this is the right foum :/. Anyway, as a scrupulous person myself I want to ask, what are some things that help/helped you in your struggle?
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jaimeleglise
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Obedience to holy priest spiritual director.
Medication can help.
The Liguourian press has resources such as Scrupolous Anonymous.
Ignore the thoughts. If you fight them they can get stronger.
Realize these thoughts are not true and they are not sins.
Medication can help.
The Liguourian press has resources such as Scrupolous Anonymous.
Ignore the thoughts. If you fight them they can get stronger.
Realize these thoughts are not true and they are not sins.
S
sugarmouse
Guest
Don’t know if intrusive thoughts are an issue for you, but they used to be a big problem for me.
One thing that helped a lot was to realise that what matters is whether or not you WANT the thought. It doesn’t matter how LONG you’ve got a thought in your head. I used to get an unwanted thought “stuck” in my head, and panic because it was taking me so long to get “rid” of it, as if the mere length of time it was stuck there would suddenly turn it into a sin. And panicking usually only makes the thought stay longer!
So it’s very helpful to remember that if a thought pops up, there’s no hurry to get rid of it or panic about it. It’s much better to:
And better to think of it in terms of being silly or stupid, rather than calling it a “bad” thought. “Bad thought” to the scrupulous implies that THEY must be bad for having it in their head in the first place. But that’s not how the human mind works. Random thoughts are a bit like dreams, without much logic or sense.
Anyway, just my :twocents: for anyone who might be interested.
One thing that helped a lot was to realise that what matters is whether or not you WANT the thought. It doesn’t matter how LONG you’ve got a thought in your head. I used to get an unwanted thought “stuck” in my head, and panic because it was taking me so long to get “rid” of it, as if the mere length of time it was stuck there would suddenly turn it into a sin. And panicking usually only makes the thought stay longer!
So it’s very helpful to remember that if a thought pops up, there’s no hurry to get rid of it or panic about it. It’s much better to:
- RELAX (take a deep breath - it helps)
- Acknowledge in your head something like, “Oh, a silly thought. Not interested in that.”
- Ignore, and get on with your day as normal.
And better to think of it in terms of being silly or stupid, rather than calling it a “bad” thought. “Bad thought” to the scrupulous implies that THEY must be bad for having it in their head in the first place. But that’s not how the human mind works. Random thoughts are a bit like dreams, without much logic or sense.
Anyway, just my :twocents: for anyone who might be interested.
S
StudentMI
Guest
Two words: Liguori Press. They have published so much about scrupulosity. I was fortunate enough to find a copy of a short book called Helps for the Scrupulous by Russell Abata. Really helped me. The Redemptorists are awesome.
Also, to be frank, medication. I have clinically diagnosed anxiety and OCD. My confessor actually told me during a talk that I should not think of myself as scrupulous but as obsessive compulsive. He wanted to demarcate the line between a medical condition and a religious condition, and therefore to seek medical help. And for me, that was the right answer. Before I met him, while I was in RCIA, I was heavily considering severe mutilation of my body and blinding myself. The parish priest, different guy, told me I needed to be on medication and I needed a doctor as I broke down and began sobbing. He was a great guy but he had lost his patience and it really made an impact on me. I told him St Francis threw himself into a bush full of thorns, after mentioning my ideas of mutilation of my body, and he actually yelled at me, at the top of his lungs, “You’re not ******* St Francis!” Quite a wake up call. But it did help in the long run.
Sorry for the long digression. I do think there is a difference between scrupulosity and OCD, as my confessor made clear for me.
Also, to be frank, medication. I have clinically diagnosed anxiety and OCD. My confessor actually told me during a talk that I should not think of myself as scrupulous but as obsessive compulsive. He wanted to demarcate the line between a medical condition and a religious condition, and therefore to seek medical help. And for me, that was the right answer. Before I met him, while I was in RCIA, I was heavily considering severe mutilation of my body and blinding myself. The parish priest, different guy, told me I needed to be on medication and I needed a doctor as I broke down and began sobbing. He was a great guy but he had lost his patience and it really made an impact on me. I told him St Francis threw himself into a bush full of thorns, after mentioning my ideas of mutilation of my body, and he actually yelled at me, at the top of his lungs, “You’re not ******* St Francis!” Quite a wake up call. But it did help in the long run.
Sorry for the long digression. I do think there is a difference between scrupulosity and OCD, as my confessor made clear for me.
K
KiwiBliss
Guest
I’ve got a keychain that says: “Keep calm and pray” (front side) & “Don’t worry about everything, pray about everything” (back side)- so everytime I grab my keys from my purse, I see that keychain. It reminds me to pray about every little & hard thing, rather than worrying so much about everything. And what a difference that makes! Say a Hail Mary out loud or internally afterwards- less scruples happen b/c the evil one unfortunately hates Mary, so when that prayer is said, he flees & Mary is what remains with us.I’m pretty sure this is the right foum :/. Anyway, as a scrupulous person myself I want to ask, what are some things that help/helped you in your struggle?
Privately pray out loud (in my room/car)- most times my scruples remain huge internally, until I share with a trusted person or simply Jesus & Our Lady (Mary) since they’re always with us. For me, when I talk about my scruples & everything I worry about out loud, all those worries come to the surface & are put into perspective, meaning that I know by then what I should do or how to handle a situation after talking it over.
Ask for a trusted person’s advice on my worries/scruples- they will give you an honest yet constructive answer/response (not meant to offend, but rather to build us up into better people). It helps to get an outside perspective of our internally scrupulous mentality, to distinguish between what is necessary & what’s not to our mind, body, & soul.
Learn something new by researching- eases or distracts in a good sense my mind from wandering into nonstop thinking of something (past experience, the future). For example, looking up cosmetic ingredients such as nail polish and finding harmful effects with biting one’s nails and inhaling it- that prevented me from using nail polish all together and influenced my life in a positive way. Another example is researching about the pros and cons of fast food b/c when I worry a lot, I sometimes turn to comfort (junk) food to try coping with the frustrations of my worries about life’s challenges that to me seem difficult but to others seem minor. By looking up fast food ingredients and what branded companies support, in my opinion, does help me refrain from eating out more & teaches me that making my own food is healthier & more comfortable to me than eating somewhere where people are watching me eat by myself, whereas at home I can eat naturally however way I eat.
Listen to music- my favorite type of music is piano instrumental: Piano Guys, Jon Sarta, (particular) movie soundtracks, & Christian music artist songs that continue to inspire me to keep moving forward and are relative to my life.
Visit the park- exploring the wonders of nature within a natural park is fascinating to me. Before entering a particular woods in my favorite park, I usually pray internally (if other people are around) or out loud (if no one else is around), “Okay, dear Jesus. What do you desire to teach or reveal to me today?”… each day Jesus teaches us a lesson of some sort about something for a reason & I like to dive deeper under the surface of things. My favorite part of this woods is to listen amid the silence and all of a sudden hear a woodpecker pecking at wood distinctively and it grabs my attention for awhile to listen, watch, and reflect on paying attention to what’s going on around me externally than more internally & helps me recognize that Jesus, Our Lady, the Holy Spirit within us, & our Guardian Angel are with us always & even during those scrupulous and worrying moments of our lives- They remain amid our suffering and other experiences.
~Overall, do what works for you. Everyone does things differently & uniquely. Again, find what works for you & stick to it. What are some ways that have helped you with, I’m guessing, both life’s ups & downs?
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