Searching without a church?

[FabiusMaximus]

Hey guys. I was just wondering if any of you were ever in a situation where you were unchurched in a period where you were searching for the right church to attend.

I know we should always go to church, but if you don’t feel as if the church you’ve attended for years is right for you anymore, and look to find the truth, then what does one do?

Just curious on if you guys have gone through something similar.

 

[Nicea325]

Hey guys. I was just wondering if any of you were ever in a situation where you were unchurched in a period where you were searching for the right church to attend.

I know we should always go to church, but if you don’t feel as if the church you’ve attended for years is right for you anymore, and look to find the truth, then what does one do?

Just curious on if you guys have gone through something similar.

First of all, what do you mean by searching for the “right” church? What does it entail? I personally have never understood such a position. The “right” church?

 

[FabiusMaximus]

First of all, what do you mean by searching for the “right” church? What does it entail? I personally have never understood such a position. The “right” church?

Apologies, I should specify.

Someone who is looking for what he believes to be a more doctrinally sound church (or denomination).

 

[JonathonofOhio]

I went for a time without going to Church, and went to other Church’s on and off. I ended up back with the Catholic Church where I have been ever since and will not leave.

I wish I would have attended Mass while I was ‘searching’ though…come to find out, you don’t have to understand much of anything to receive grace from God through the Sacraments.

 

[Della]

First of all pray that God will guide you to the fullness of truth. And then be prepared for the ride of your life! This is the testimony of one who has been there and had that journey.

The true Church must be able to stand up to all it claims about itself. You are on a Catholic website and a Catholic forum, so let’s look at the claims of the Catholic Church.

It claims to be one, holy, catholic, and apostolic–the four signs of the true Church hammered out in the 4th century and contained in the Nicene Creed.

It is one and always has been since Christ founded it in 33 AD.

It is holy because it’s head is Christ and always has been.

It’s catholic–meaning universal. The Catholic Church is the same all over the world. It has various liturgical rites, but it believes the same things and holds to the same truths everywhere.

And finally apostolic. It was founded on the Apostles who passed down the charism of infallibility to their successors. This is the gift and promise of Christ, the Church’s founder, it’s not an invention of men.

These are the Church’s claims, all of which can be verified in history. That is the sum of it. For more information, please go to the Catholic Answers main page and look up any topic you need for your researches. And please ask all the questions you have. We’re here to help you all we can. In the end, though, only you can decide what God wants for you. We will not coerce you or challenge you–that’s the Holy Spirit’s “job”, if those are the right terms to use. But we will pray along with you and answer your questions as best we can and direct you to resources if we can’t. God bless you and your journey to him.

 

[Nicea325]

Apologies, I should specify.

Someone who is looking for what he believes to be a more doctrinally sound church (or denomination).

Whew! Well unfortunately, that is one of the core issues: thousands of different denominations, which can be very confusing for anyone trying to follow Jesus and the Church he founded or doctrinally sound. The best advice I can give anyone is first start off by researching & truly studying early church history.I have learned many people,in particular non-Catholics rarely dive deep into history. One has to go beyond the scope of the Bible. Remember,Jesus founded His Church and did not leave us a Bible-Only faith. We area faith of the person: Jesus Christ,not a book only faith.

Peace

 

[Cavaradossi]

Hey guys. I was just wondering if any of you were ever in a situation where you were unchurched in a period where you were searching for the right church to attend.

I know we should always go to church, but if you don’t feel as if the church you’ve attended for years is right for you anymore, and look to find the truth, then what does one do?

Just curious on if you guys have gone through something similar.

Investigate the history of Christianity and determine which Church seems to undeniably be the true One, Holy, Catholic and Apostolic Church. For me, I found that Orthodoxy had the best claim to being that Church, others have found it in the Catholic Church and yet others have found it in either Anglicanism, Protestantism or Oriental Orthodoxy. But never mix up your priorities, you’re not looking for the Church whose truth agrees with your truth, you’re looking for the Church whose truth is the truth, if that make sense.

 

[CMatt25]

It claims to be one, holy, catholic, and apostolic–the four signs of the true Church hammered out in the 4th century and contained in the Nicene Creed.

It is one and always has been since Christ founded it in 33 AD.

The Catholic Church is the same all over the world.

Much time passed between 33 AD and the 4th century and days obligated to attend Mass are not the same all over the world.

 

[FabiusMaximus]

Admittedly, I must say it’s funny how this all changed into a ‘let me show you which is the true Church’ kind of thread. I was merely asking if people ever had their own time when they were unchurched before converting to the denomination they are now in. But whatever .

The best advice I can give anyone is first start off by researching & truly studying early church history.I have learned many people,in particular non-Catholics rarely dive deep into history.

Yeah well that’s what started this whole mess. Stumbling into a Lutheran church with a friend on Christmas Eve and finding out that a whole world of Christianity existed beyond what I was used to (aside what I considered at the time to be the ‘erring’ Roman Catholic Church).

Investigate the history of Christianity and determine which Church seems to undeniably be the true One, Holy, Catholic and Apostolic Church. For me, I found that Orthodoxy had the best claim to being that Church, others have found it in the Catholic Church and yet others have found it in either Anglicanism, Protestantism or Oriental Orthodoxy.** But never mix up your priorities, you’re not looking for the Church whose truth agrees with your truth, you’re looking for the Church whose truth is the truth, if that make sense.**

That’s always the tough one, Cavaradossi. I pray that I get truth alone, though I admit to sometimes having bias or ‘preference’ one way or another. In the back of my mind I want Pentecostalism to win out. But I absolutely agree with what you say. But I’ve left my comfort zone enough so I don’t plan on doing things only half-way.

It claims to be one, holy, catholic, and apostolic–the four signs of the true Church hammered out in the 4th century and contained in the Nicene Creed.

It is one and always has been since Christ founded it in 33 AD.

It is holy because it’s head is Christ and always has been.

Granted, but I’d venture to say that many Protestants (and I mean more along of the lines of Lutherans and Anglicans) would say that the Catholic Church in general fulfilled those claims until a gradual process led it astray, which led to its restoration with the Reformation. I’ve yet to met a single Lutheran who would say that Lutheranism changed the faith, but that it is the original, true, revitalized catholic Church (indeed some here seem to refer themselves as ‘Evangelical Catholics.’ Of course whether that claim is true is part of the debate.

We will not coerce you or challenge you–that’s the Holy Spirit’s “job”, if those are the right terms to use. But we will pray along with you and answer your questions as best we can and direct you to resources if we can’t. God bless you and your journey to him.

I would instead hope that you do try to challenge my opinions and presuppositions. That’s the best way to investigate and research.

 

[CMatt25]

Admittedly, I must say it’s funny how this all changed into a ‘let me show you which is the true Church’ kind of thread. I was merely asking if people ever had their own time when they were unchurched before converting to the denomination they are now in. But whatever .

Hi Fab, to get back to your question, well yes I’ve gone unchurched before yet I’ve always been interested in learning about various faiths. Always in seek mode. I’ve since worshiped in Catholic churches again more frequently. But always still praying and contemplating, trying to listen to His Spirit, to determine where God wants me to be. An Episcopalian priest once gave me that advice. Where 2 or 3 are gathered in His name, there He is in their midsts. God bless you on your lifelong journey of faith. Peace.

 

[Rawb]

Well, waaaaay back before I became Catholic I was sort of that way, but as a Protestant I believed it didn’t matter whether I went to Church or not so long as I lived a “Christian Life” (oh youthful enthusiasm. I believe firmly now that it is impossible to live a Christian Life without that community of The Church. I expect maybe that’s the issue that has you bringing up this thread in the first place?)

Then when I was becoming Orthodox, before I had firmly settled on leaving Roman Catholicism for Holy Orthodoxy I called myself “The Homeless Christian” to the friend I discussed these issues with, but I wasn’t really. I still went, every Sunday to either Mass or Divine Liturgy. Obviously I eventually found the Orthodox claims to being Christ’s Church much stronger than I found the Catholic claims.

I sort of get the…I don’t know the term, pain? you’re going through. If you believe as I did/do, that you must be part of a church, but you’re unsure which one to attend, it can be a difficult decision. If you continue in the church you used to attend you may be learning things that are false and difficult to unlearn, as well as feeding into the emotional ties that make it difficult to break with a church and biasing yourself in it’s favor. If you go to a different church each week, well, you’re not really going to get the experience of any of those churches.

Have you narrowed it down to a few possibilities? Or at least, have you narrowed down the sources you’re using to find Christ’s Church? That might be the first step.

 

[CMatt25]

Well, waaaaay back before I became Catholic I was sort of that way, but as a Protestant I believed it didn’t matter whether I went to Church or not so long as I lived a “Christian Life” (oh youthful enthusiasm. I believe firmly now that it is impossible to live a Christian Life without that community of The Church. I expect maybe that’s the issue that has you bringing up this thread in the first place?)

Then when I was becoming Orthodox, before I had firmly settled on leaving Roman Catholicism for Holy Orthodoxy I called myself “The Homeless Christian” to the friend I discussed these issues with, but I wasn’t really. I still went, every Sunday to either Mass or Divine Liturgy. Obviously I eventually found the Orthodox claims to being Christ’s Church much stronger than I found the Catholic claims.

I sort of get the…I don’t know the term, pain? you’re going through. If you believe as I did/do, that you must be part of a church, but you’re unsure which one to attend, it can be a difficult decision. If you continue in the church you used to attend you may be learning things that are false and difficult to unlearn, as well as feeding into the emotional ties that make it difficult to break with a church and biasing yourself in it’s favor. If you go to a different church each week, well, you’re not really going to get the experience of any of those churches.

Have you narrowed it down to a few possibilities? Or at least, have you narrowed down the sources you’re using to find Christ’s Church? That might be the first step.

Rawb wow you’ve had quite a journey. Protestant to Catholic to Orthodox. Thanks for sharing your story and God bless! I totally get the “pain” or difficulty. Continued peace.

 

[Della]

Admittedly, I must say it’s funny how this all changed into a ‘let me show you which is the true Church’ kind of thread. I was merely asking if people ever had their own time when they were unchurched before converting to the denomination they are now in. But whatever .

Sorry, I didn’t “get” that from your post. I was never unchurched but I was Episcopalian, then Pentecostal, then Episcopalian again and finally Catholic–after being Catholic for 20+ years I think I can safely say this is it.

Yeah well that’s what started this whole mess. Stumbling into a Lutheran church with a friend on Christmas Eve and finding out that a whole world of Christianity existed beyond what I was used to (aside what I considered at the time to be the ‘erring’ Roman Catholic Church).

I had similar experiences when I’d visit Catholic parishes. Being brought up Episcopalian I already had a slight understanding that the Church wasn’t founded in the 19th Century, but being taken out of it in my early teens meant I learned very little real Church history for quite a while.

That’s always the tough one, Cavaradossi. I pray that I get truth alone, though I admit to sometimes having bias or ‘preference’ one way or another. In the back of my mind I want Pentecostalism to win out. But I absolutely agree with what you say. But I’ve left my comfort zone enough so I don’t plan on doing things only half-way.

Leaving one’s comfort zone is the first step. We all want to feel like we’re in our element–it’s cultural as well as theological, isn’t it? It took me a long time to adapt to the Catholic mind set/world view, so I think I understand something of your dilemma.

Granted, but I’d venture to say that many Protestants (and I mean more along of the lines of Lutherans and Anglicans) would say that the Catholic Church in general fulfilled those claims until a gradual process led it astray, which led to its restoration with the Reformation. I’ve yet to met a single Lutheran who would say that Lutheranism changed the faith, but that it is the original, true, revitalized catholic Church (indeed some here seem to refer themselves as ‘Evangelical Catholics.’ Of course whether that claim is true is part of the debate.

Yes, and that’s what Luther set out to do, but his denial of good works for faith alone set in motion the ultimate break up of Christendom into not 2 major parts but hundreds, some would say thousands, if you count all the little groups that pop up almost daily hoping to return to the “true Church of the Bible”–a misnomer since there never was a Church of the Bible but only the Church Christ founded. By placing the Bible as an authority over the Church Luther inspired others to interpret it as they also pleased–something he couldn’t stop although he tried. It was a gross misunderstanding of what the Bible is and its place in Sacred Tradition that caused a revolution in theology, that has led to one denial after another of the teachings passed down by the Apostles from Christ. The Church isn’t one among many denominations–it is Christ’s Church to which he promised three things: that it would never fail, that it would be led into all truth by the Holy Spirit, and that it would have the authority to “bind and loose”. To say that it went astray is to say that Christ couldn’t/didn’t keep those promises–not that non-Catholic Christians have that intention, but that is the ultimate result. A lot of discovering the truth is seeing the ultimate end of a teaching. If it leads to doubting the Lord about anything it can’t be good.

I would instead hope that you do try to challenge my opinions and presuppositions. That’s the best way to investigate and research.

Okay, you asked for it. Ha! But what I meant is no one is going to back you into a corner and tell you what to believe. It’s up to the Holy Spirit to convince us of the truth. The apologist’s part is simply to relate the facts, be encouraging in the process, pray (of course) and let the other person make his own decisions.

 

[valentino]

Hey guys. I was just wondering if any of you were ever in a situation where you were unchurched in a period where you were searching for the right church to attend.

I know we should always go to church, but if you don’t feel as if the church you’ve attended for years is right for you anymore, and look to find the truth, then what does one do?

Just curious on if you guys have gone through something similar.

I think most of us have searched for a church we could agree with.fortunately I was raised a Catholic so it was probably easier for me than most when i went searching.After grade school i more or less stop going to Church and kind of wandered around for 20 yrs.not believing in much of anything.When I did start looking I attended various different christian churches but I found them all to be simular.To be truthful not insultful i found all these churches to be shallow.they lacked substance.

 

[FabiusMaximus]

Well, waaaaay back before I became Catholic I was sort of that way, but as a Protestant I believed it didn’t matter whether I went to Church or not so long as I lived a “Christian Life” (oh youthful enthusiasm. I believe firmly now that it is impossible to live a Christian Life without that community of The Church. I expect maybe that’s the issue that has you bringing up this thread in the first place?)

Haha well I’m 20 so I know a lot about “youthful enthusiasm” and even more about youthful intellectual arrogance.
It’s not that I don’t believe I need a church, I most certainly do, it’s just tha I’m in that point where I don’t know where to go. The community of the church is certainly essential, I’d say, to a person’s well-being. It always has been, and it’s erosion I’d argue is part of the reason for the West’s moral malaise.

Then when I was becoming Orthodox, before I had firmly settled on leaving Roman Catholicism for Holy Orthodoxy I called myself “The Homeless Christian” to the friend I discussed these issues with, but I wasn’t really. I still went, every Sunday to either Mass or Divine Liturgy. Obviously I eventually found the Orthodox claims to being Christ’s Church much stronger than I found the Catholic claims.

Wow what a trip. Makes my head spin! But at least you finally found what worked best for you. It’s a fascinating story.

I sort of get the…I don’t know the term, pain? you’re going through. If you believe as I did/do, that you must be part of a church, but you’re unsure which one to attend, it can be a difficult decision. If you continue in the church you used to attend you may be learning things that are false and difficult to unlearn, as well as feeding into the emotional ties that make it difficult to break with a church and biasing yourself in it’s favor. If you go to a different church each week, well, you’re not really going to get the experience of any of those churches.

I will never return to that church. When asked by people who attend that church on why I don’t return, I tell them the truth: in studying I’ve found out that I no longer agree with the majority of what the pastor teaches and believed it was necessary to leave. But he essentially preached power-puff Christianity. “Christianity is a person,” “God loves you” - nothing really of substance. I got more out of the DL. And, I love the incense and all the little old ladies who attack you with blessed bread. You just can’t go wrong there.

Have you narrowed it down to a few possibilities? Or at least, have you narrowed down the sources you’re using to find Christ’s Church? That might be the first step.

I think I’ve narrowed it down to more or less either Catholicism, Orthodoxy, or Lutheranism. Admittedly I haven’t studied much Anglicanism, though it’s worth a look. There needs to be a nifty compendium of the Church Fathers that give a theological issue and give the quotes on what they say. I’m always impressed by the Fathers, though. Brilliant people. And they say that Christianity has no logic! I’d say that early Christian writings easily are on par with some of the Classic texts.

@della

Sorry, I didn’t “get” that from your post. I was never unchurched but I was Episcopalian, then Pentecostal, then Episcopalian again and finally Catholic–after being Catholic for 20+ years I think I can safely say this is it.

I just like to be a hardball. Glad you’re happy with Catholicism, though.

Yes, and that’s what Luther set out to do, but his denial of good works for faith alone set in motion the ultimate break up of Christendom into not 2 major parts but hundreds, some would say thousands, if you count all the little groups that pop up almost daily hoping to return to the “true Church of the Bible”–a misnomer since there never was a Church of the Bible but only the Church Christ founded. By placing the Bible as an authority over the Church Luther inspired others to interpret it as they also pleased–something he couldn’t stop although he tried.

Poor Luther, though, in his defense, was a quite moderate reformer. When I learned for the first time that he believed in the real presence, I was just thinking ‘You’ve got to be kidding me. People actually believed this? THEY believe this?’ But I do agree that the emphasis on the ‘priesthood of all believers’ caused an irreversible spiral. He couldn’t realize it himself. It’s interesting that Luther got himself into similar messes as well. One of his texts on authority was misinterpreted by peasants who used it to start a revolt and to kill people. He was blamed for it, but he never meant for that to happen at all. Ah, history .

Okay, you asked for it. Ha! But what I meant is no one is going to back you into a corner and tell you what to believe. It’s up to the Holy Spirit to convince us of the truth. The apologist’s part is simply to relate the facts, be encouraging in the process, pray (of course) and let the other person make his own decisions.

Bring it on!
And yes, I agree.

 

[dzheremi]

Wow…now here’s a thread I can really relate to! I suppose I am technically in that very place right now, though perhaps a little farther down the road (maybe). My story is probably quite close to Rawb’s, as I was raised Protestant, converted to Catholicism, and now (for the past two years or so) have been heavily exploring Orthodoxy. The difference in my story is that I am an inquirer into Oriental Orthodoxy, not Eastern Orthodoxy. So I am unchurched not so much because I am unsure of where to go, but because there really isn’t anywhere to go locally where I could learn the faith as I would need to to join the church I am actually inquiring about. The local OO attend an EO parish basically for this reason (it’s the only game in town), but of course they are already firmly rooted in their own churches’ traditions (they’re mostly Ethiopians and Eritreans), and are obviously there with the approval of the OCA and Bulgarian leadership in the area. If I were blessed to be in the same place, I would do the same thing.

So, yeah, I understand the pain, too. For a while there I thought I would go crazy trying to reconcile all of this stuff! But trust in God. It not only gets better, it’s essential to go through this precisely because it shows you and anyone who might ask that you really do care about your religion and beliefs, and are willing to be uncomfortable rather than be complacent. And that is what God says is necessary to truly follow Him.

“I know your works, that you are neither cold nor hot. I could wish you were cold or hot. So then, because you are lukewarm, and neither cold nor hot, I will vomit you out of My mouth."

So it is infinitely better to be uncomfortable than to be lukewarm, going through the motions in a church that you cannot believe in while your faith withers and dies from malnourishment. May God bless you in your journey. Remember that it is the journey of a lifetime, and at its conclusion (God willing) is salvation and eternity with God. That is worth all the pain in the world.

 

[AmateurPianist]

Apologies, I should specify.

Someone who is looking for what he believes to be a more doctrinally sound church (or denomination).

Things you might want to think about…

What if none are doctrinally perfect?

What is your criteria for measuring doctrine?

Is doctrine the only benchmark you should use in measuring churches?

What are you doing in the meantime?

I sort of went through the same thing a while back and concluded that whatever problems may or may not exist in my little patch of the pie, that we were doing a pretty good job of living the message of Jesus Christ, both in our region and throughout the world. At least as good as any other church in my region. And in the end that is what mattered most to me.

 

[FabiusMaximus]

The difference in my story is that I am an inquirer into Oriental Orthodoxy, not Eastern Orthodoxy. So I am unchurched not so much because I am unsure of where to go, but because there really isn’t anywhere to go locally where I could learn the faith as I would need to to join the church I am actually inquiring about.

May I ask why Oriental and not Eastern Orthodoxy?

So it is infinitely better to be uncomfortable than to be lukewarm, going through the motions in a church that you cannot believe in while your faith withers and dies from malnourishment. May God bless you in your journey. Remember that it is the journey of a lifetime, and at its conclusion (God willing) is salvation and eternity with God. That is worth all the pain in the world.

God bless you too on yours. And it sure is.

I sort of went through the same thing a while back and concluded that whatever problems may or may not exist in my little patch of the pie, that we were doing a pretty good job of living the message of Jesus Christ, both in our region and throughout the world. At least as good as any other church in my region. And in the end that is what mattered most to me.

I’m aware that all churches have their problems, their issues, their imperfections. I don’t have any real personal problems with people from that church.

I grew up Pentecostal, my father is ordained in the Assemblies of God (more properly, it’s Italian branch, the Assemblee di Dio in Italia), so I can see where you’re coming from.

But I think an important component of being Christian - aside of course living your life in Christ, as you said - is knowing what you believe and why you believe it. And ultimately, living your life for Christ means accepting his teachings, in totality, no matter what they may be. I was always loyal to Pentecostalism in general because that’s how I was raised, and my parents were stigmatized by family, friends, and society (the charismatic movement of the 1970s was very new for Italians, there was no ‘Astuza Street Revival’ like in the States) when they left Catholicism for Pentecostalism. So it’s not something I take in lightly. I’m aware of what I’ve gotten myself into. I’m aware what ‘defection’ means. But I jumped in, so I can’t just walk out. I want to walk in a Christianity that is close as humanly possible to what Christ actually intended.

I’ve a passion for history. I have a personal theory that the key to understanding anything and everything is by studying its history. If Christianity really was corrupted and needed reform, then there must have been a period in which it was true, accurate, and pure. A corruption must have occurred then several hundred years after its onset. To give a banal example - if Communion is purely symbolic, like the Assemblies of God teaches - then the early Church must have believed that, and a corruption like the real presence must have been an addition hundreds of years later.

It’s not so. Zwingli asserts the first real major defense of memoralism. That made me ask serious, serious questions. So while living our lives in a Christian way is an imperative (which I often fail), accuracy I feel is a must, too. Sound doctrine.

 

[GaryTaylor]

Whew! Well unfortunately, that is one of the core issues: thousands of different denominations, which can be very confusing for anyone trying to follow Jesus and the Church he founded or doctrinally sound. The best advice I can give anyone is first start off by researching & truly studying early church history.I have learned many people,in particular non-Catholics rarely dive deep into history. One has to go beyond the scope of the Bible. Remember,Jesus founded His Church and did not leave us a Bible-Only faith.

Peace

Yes the priesthood continued through the early centurys in Apostolic Succession through the One Holy Catholic Apostolic Church. Which holds a history traced to Jesus Christ in Scripture and continues to live and grow on Earth.

Peace

 

[Mark_David]

If it were not a doctrinally sound church, I’d say you were spiritually obliged to find an orthodox one. But if it were a case of (say) boredom, then I would suggest that it may be the individual who needs to probe his conscience and ask himself why he’s bored of that church. It may be weakening faith, for instance.