Second Marriage

[bildjf]

My son was married in a civil ceremony 10 years ago. He and his wife are baptized Catholic. They divorced several years ago. It is my understanding the Church does not recognize the first marriage. His current fiance’ is Lutheran. They are having a civil ceremony. My sister will not attend and tells me it is immoral for her to attend a wedding of a Catholic getting remarried out of the Church.

What is the Church position on this?

 

[adrift]

Ask an Apologist

This means that all marriages that involve a Catholic in a wedding ceremony outside the Church or without the Church’s permission are invalid.

If I understand correctly, your son’s first marriage is invalid as well as his attempted second marriage. Your sister is right in not attending.

 

[1ke]

My son was married in a civil ceremony 10 years ago. He and his wife are baptized Catholic. They divorced several years ago. It is my understanding the Church does not recognize the first marriage.

That is correct. It was an invalid attempt at marriage. However, in order for him to be declared free to marry (in the US or Canada, it’s different in Europe and elsewhere) he will have to do some administrative paperwork with is priest.

His current fiance’ is Lutheran. They are having a civil ceremony. My sister will not attend and tells me it is immoral for her to attend a wedding of a Catholic getting remarried out of the Church.

If he is marrying the Lutheran in a civil ceremony without doing the following, it too is an invalid attempt at marriage, and your sister is correct she should not be attending:

• Be declared free to marry due to “lack of form” through his local diocesan tribunal
• Attend Catholic marriage preparation (both of them)
• Receive permission for mixed marriage from the bishop (involves promises related to raising the children Catholic on the part of the Catholic)
• Receive a dispensation from canonical form to marry her in a civil or Lutheran cermony

All of the above start with an appointment with his pastor

What is the Church position on this?

That Catholics are obligated to marry according to Church law.

And that we should not participate in sin or encourage it through our actions. That we should use our prudential judgment and encourage Catholics to follow Church law on marriage.

 

[Rence]

My son was married in a civil ceremony 10 years ago. He and his wife are baptized Catholic. They divorced several years ago. It is my understanding the Church does not recognize the first marriage. His current fiance’ is Lutheran. They are having a civil ceremony. My sister will not attend and tells me it is immoral for her to attend a wedding of a Catholic getting remarried out of the Church.

What is the Church position on this?

The Church’s position is that no marriage outside the Catholic Church is valid for Catholics. So both his first and second marriages are not recognized by the Church. However, boycotting the wedding in the name of religion will probably most likely only alienate him rather than bring him towards the Church - which is what any loving sibling would try to do. I would still go to the wedding and work on brining him in Communion with the Church. There is a better chance in helping him if the wedding is not boycotted than if it is.

 

[Anglewannabe]

I am not 100% sure of the teaching of the church about attending invalid wedding ceremonies, however, I do believe your sister needs to follow her conscious. We are all called to convert people yet how we go about it is individual

Personally, I agree with your sister. I think that if we want to bring people to Christ, we need to show them the true teachings. It would be hypocritical to attend an invalid wedding, and once the person converts, give them the truth about their marriage.

Being a practicing Catholic is a serious commitment to God and everyone deserves to know what they are getting into

Angie