Self-inflicted pain to stop masturbation

[sing]

Pushing nails into the flesh of your palms could be in improvised replacement, I guess. It clears the mind a bit and gets it rid of clouding thoughts by taking the focus off them, but I’d be careful with that. It’s a good snap effect, but associations could be bad.

NO. NO. NO.

I can’t say enough how bad of an idea this is. You start out small, with something like that, then you get a tolerance for that amount of pain, so it doesn’t have the same effect, so you do more, and it turns into a horrible cycle. It starts out small, and you think it’s a good thing, an ok thing, but it’s not.

Aside from the addiction, it fosters self-hate. If you are capable of and get into the habit of mistreating your body, then it eats away at your ability to love your body and yourself. I don’t think I can express just how much damage it can have. I don’t think I will ever be truly “ok” again.

 

[chevalier]

There’s surely that danger. This is why I only go for such a “fix” when I need to keep my eyes open and on very rare other occasions, such as to divert focus from other pain. It’s nothing a sane person would keep doing habitually, especially when being in danger of developing self-hate, and it might be something I shouldn’t be doing anyway. But it’s a long-time habit.

 

[Abira]

actually i would concede that some thing are safe for some and dangerous for others.

I can drink for example, but someone predisposed to alcoholism can’t…

likewise with self hatred or self harm issues

S

 

[sing]

actually i would concede that some thing are safe for some and dangerous for others.

I can drink for example, but someone predisposed to alcoholism can’t…

likewise with self hatred or self harm issues

S

but then there’s the association of pain with sex. believe me, it’s not a nice thing.

Aside from that, people who are trying to overcome bad behavior have a tendency to just start substituting behaviors. I know I did.

Also, someone who is trying to overcome a sin and isn’t having much success is somewhat likely to already be angry/frustrated/upset/whatever with his or herself(guys aren’t the only ones who masturbate…), and could be more susceptible to yielding to self-hate.

 

[Abira]

but then there’s the association of pain with sex. believe me, it’s not a nice thing.

Aside from that, people who are trying to overcome bad behavior have a tendency to just start substituting behaviors. I know I did.

Also, someone who is trying to overcome a sin and isn’t having much success is somewhat likely to already be angry/frustrated/upset/whatever with his or herself(guys aren’t the only ones who masturbate…), and could be more susceptible to yielding to self-hate.

Yeah I think I posted about the two sides of sex/pain earlier…

and for the second half…don’t I know it! lol

I think some people, I think you are possibly one of them, are more easily addicted full stop - I have very few addictions… and have resisted drink and drugs and sleeping around when all the people around me take it as a matter of course. I do appreciate though that not everyone is like me… and they may struggle with forming behaviours while i struggle wit many other things.

S

 

[sing]

Another thing that caught my attention is that the OP said, in another post, that he is 17. Of course, I’d hate to make any judgements based on age, but it does seem to me that being 17 and still in the process of becoming an adult could possibly make him more susceptible to developing negative habits or associations.

 

[hamburglar]

Another thing that caught my attention is that the OP said, in another post, that he is 17. Of course, I’d hate to make any judgements based on age, but it does seem to me that being 17 and still in the process of becoming an adult could possibly make him more susceptible to developing negative habits or associations.

I just happened to revisit this thread, and what great advice everyone has given!

After hearing your experiences, sing, I definitely don’t want strange associations between pain and sexual activities.

I was recently reading into wearing the Cords of St. Joseph. It seems like a possible motivation for me.

Also, I have a St. Benedicts medal that I wear. If I ever start to want to masturbate and I have it on, I can resist the temptation just because I can feel the silver against my skin. The problem is, however, that I take it off when sleeping because it is uncomfortable, and I also take it off to take a shower. Of course, I usually get sucked into my habit at this time.

Does anyone know if it is safe to wear sterling silver in the shower? Maybe I can keep the medal on more if it is safe.

 

[LilyM]

I just happened to revisit this thread, and what great advice everyone has given!

After hearing your experiences, sing, I definitely don’t want strange associations between pain and sexual activities.

I was recently reading into wearing the Cords of St. Joseph. It seems like a possible motivation for me.

Also, I have a St. Benedicts medal that I wear. If I ever start to want to masturbate and I have it on, I can resist the temptation just because I can feel the silver against my skin. The problem is, however, that I take it off when sleeping because it is uncomfortable, and I also take it off to take a shower. Of course, I usually get sucked into my habit at this time.

Does anyone know if it is safe to wear sterling silver in the shower? Maybe I can keep the medal on more if it is safe.

Try a cloth scapular - you can wear those while sleeping - still feel them though.

Don’t know what you can do about the shower, except pray before you go into the bathroom???

 

[Greg27]

Personally I think deliberately injuring yourself for sexual sin is a very dangerous path to embark on. One should not undertake any form of harsh penitence on yourself without the advice of a spiritual guide or confessor. In fact, St John of the Cross himself came down extremely hard on those who inflicted harsh fleshly mortifications on themselves without dealing with the psychological or spiritual vices which caused them.

I think a better form of penitence would be prayer, almsgiving or fasting. Fasting might be especially effective here as if you learn to control one appetite (hunger) you can then learn to refuse giving in to inappropriate sexual appetites.

 

[DL82]

I have been trying to stop masturbating for awhile. After trying many different things, I feel that some sort of pain when I am going to start masturbating might be the best way to stop. What is a way I can do this?

This is a very dangerous tactic, and I would not advise it, at least not without spiritual direction.

The problem is, you may end up associating pain with all sexual pleasure, and being unable to derive pleasure from any healthy sexual activity within marriage. You also may end up associating sexual arrousal with the pain, so that instead of the pain stopping the arousal, you will begin to be aroused by all forms of physical pain. Both of these would condition you into a skewed sexual identity.

Be careful, or better still, just DON’T DO IT.

Cold showers, prayer, hanging a crucifix over places you usually masturbate, more prayer, fasting, adoration, confession, Bible reading, considering the merits of the Blessed Virgin, considering the merits of your own future marriage, keeping busy, doing charity work, studying the evil effects of the pornography and sex industries on exploiting human lives, frequent repentance and not getting disheartened when you fall, all good weapons to use against temptation. Pain, not so good.

 

[LilyM]

This is an old thread, guys, the OP got the message a long time ago.

 

[baltobetsy]

Hamburglar, real silver should be fine in the shower, as would stainless steel or real gold (14k, 18k or even 10k). Anything that’s base metal with a thin plating on it of the pretty metal, I would not advise wearing into the shower. Unless of course, you like a nice green ring around your neck. Make sure the chain is also made of a metal that will not corrode.

Betsy

 

[antimon]

…

(I just noticed that the thread is old)

 

[1bigcatholicfam]

One of my great uncles used to practice self flagellation to prevent himself from “self-abuse”, he was a Benedictine monk.

Masturbation is natural, as long as it is being done to prevent fornication.

My family is very open about it.

 

[beckycmarie]

Masturbation is natural, as long as it is being done to prevent fornication.

Are you trying to say it’s not a sin?

The Church teaches otherwise.

From the Catechism:

2396 Among the sins gravely contrary to chastity are masturbation, fornication, pornography, and homosexual practices.

2352 By masturbation is to be understood the deliberate stimulation of the genital organs in order to derive sexual pleasure. “Both the Magisterium of the Church, in the course of a constant tradition, and the moral sense of the faithful have been in no doubt and have firmly maintained that masturbation is an intrinsically and gravely disordered action.” “The deliberate use of the sexual faculty, for whatever reason, outside of marriage is essentially contrary to its purpose.” For here sexual pleasure is sought outside of “the sexual relationship which is demanded by the moral order and in which the total meaning of mutual self-giving and human procreation in the context of true love is achieved.”