Sex after marriage

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silgen1

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Me and my boyfriend were discussing different Catholic teachings. I have a problem with one of them that he said he followed. According to the Catholic teachings when you get married you aren’t supposed to have sex unless you are trying to have a baby.

Until I met him I’ve never had a problem with contraceptives, but I respect him so much I am re-thinking what I believe in. My other question is why are contraceptives so bad?? I understand completely what they do I just don’t understand why it is so bad. I think that maybe if I have a better understanding of this then it will be easier to accept.
 
silgen1 said:
Me and my boyfriend were discussing different Catholic teachings. I have a problem with one of them that he said he followed. According to the Catholic teachings when you get married you aren’t supposed to have sex unless you are trying to have a baby.

Until I met him I’ve never had a problem with contraceptives, but I respect him so much I am re-thinking what I believe in. My other question is why are contraceptives so bad?? I understand completely what they do I just don’t understand why it is so bad. I think that maybe if I have a better understanding of this then it will be easier to accept.
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  1. nope…sex is not just for when you are ‘trying’ to have a baby…there is the unitive (uniting the husband and wife in love) and the procreative (open to a baby)
both are part of the marital act…one must be open to life…but one does not have to have martial relations only ‘to have’ a baby…and if one has some serious reason (which can vary) to hold off …one can avoid for a time by natural family planning…
  1. Contraception…yes such is not good. it can ruin both of the above…and it is a lie…for in the language of the body …one says…i give myself totally to you…but when one throws in contraception …one is lying …for one is hold back ones fertility…and one is closed to life…
there is much more on this…but it is late and I am sure you will be filled in on this by other…

you can find info here christopherwest.com/

and here ascensionpress.com/shop/Scripts/prodView.asp?idproduct=80
 
\According to the Catholic teachings when you get married you aren’t supposed to have sex unless you are trying to have a baby.\

**This is not and has never been the teaching of the Church.

Where did you get this idea?

Being open to the procreation of a new individual person is NOT the same thing as sex only for making babies.**
 
silgen1 said:
Me and my boyfriend were discussing different Catholic teachings. I have a problem with one of them that he said he followed. According to the Catholic teachings when you get married you aren’t supposed to have sex unless you are trying to have a baby.
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That is a misunderstanding or a slang comment, the teaching is open to life (no contraceptive)
Until I met him I’ve never had a problem with contraceptives, but I respect him so much I am re-thinking what I believe in. My other question is why are contraceptives so bad??
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They separate or suspend the responsibilities of sex allowing for the breakdown of the proper male/female relationship.
I understand completely what they do I just don’t understand why it is so bad. I think that maybe if I have a better understanding of this then it will be easier to accept.
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it is a difficult understanding, Humanae Vitae is the primary teaching

I hope you know child spacing is allowed through natural methods
 
silgen1 said:
Me and my boyfriend were discussing different Catholic teachings. I have a problem with one of them that he said he followed. According to the Catholic teachings when you get married you aren’t supposed to have sex unless you are trying to have a baby.

Until I met him I’ve never had a problem with contraceptives, but I respect him so much I am re-thinking what I believe in. My other question is why are contraceptives so bad?? I understand completely what they do I just don’t understand why it is so bad. I think that maybe if I have a better understanding of this then it will be easier to accept.
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There are two types of contraceptive that is really bad - (1) the pills and (2) Intra-uterine device or IUD. They have bad side effect to your health. The former can lead to cancer and the latter, being a foreign body, can damage your uterus by constantly poisoning it. These are good reasons to avoid them if you do not believe in the spiritual aspect of it.

BTW, if you want to plan your family, you can use the Natural Family Planning (NFP) method which the Church allows. It is quite effective to stagger your family.

God bless you.
 
You may not know that many forms of the pill do not prevent conception, only implantation. Women who use these forms of the pill, as well as IUDs, cause the death of conceived children, because we believe that life begins at conception. Please check into Natural Family Planning!

Peace,
Kathy
 
silgen1 said:
Me and my boyfriend were discussing different Catholic teachings. I have a problem with one of them that he said he followed. According to the Catholic teachings when you get married you aren’t supposed to have sex unless you are trying to have a baby.

Until I met him I’ve never had a problem with contraceptives, but I respect him so much I am re-thinking what I believe in. My other question is why are contraceptives so bad?? I understand completely what they do I just don’t understand why it is so bad. I think that maybe if I have a better understanding of this then it will be easier to accept.
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God is the Author of life. God is never going to create a human being “by accident.” The use of contraceptives presupposes that God could accidentally create a human being in your womb, without actually meaning to.

Can you see how absurd that is?

But when we use contraceptives, we get in God’s way and take away His chance to create a human being that He loves, and who will in turn share love with us.
 
I just read “The Good News about Sex and Marriage” by Chris West and I think it would help you immensely!!! I definitely recommend it! It’s amazing.
 
silgen1 said:
Me and my boyfriend were discussing different Catholic teachings. I have a problem with one of them that he said he followed. According to the Catholic teachings when you get married you aren’t supposed to have sex unless you are trying to have a baby.
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Human Sexuality?

I would suggest your boyfriend and you read Theology of the Body together. There is a Theology of the Body for Teens which is a much easier to read. I used it as a primer before getting into Pope John Paul’s actual text. By the way did you know JP II had a very close friend, I believe her name was Hania, when he was a young man? As I understand his teachings on human sexuality he thought it was one of God’s greatest gifts. He taught his students not to treat it as a game though.
Until I met him I’ve never had a problem with contraceptives, but I respect him so much I am re-thinking what I believe in. My other question is why are contraceptives so bad?? I understand completely what they do I just don’t understand why it is so bad. I think that maybe if I have a better understanding of this then it will be easier to accept.
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Contraception?

Think about your family tree - there are your parents, grandparents, great grandparents, and so on. Anywhere along the path of time in your family if there had been a contraceptive act then you would not be here to respect and love your boyfriend. Your boyfriend and you are each unique persons. There is nobody else that is like you 100%. You have a soul and unique DNA within in you. You were concieved, loved and nurtured which brought you to this point in time. Any contraception used back in time and a different human being would be sitting at your computer reading this reply. I was a father once, but the child never made it out of my wife’s womb. That child will never read a message forum on a computer. This happened naturally. Contraception is not natural.

Those are my thoughts.

God bless
 
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