Sex Education

[Adam1986]

I was listening to a conversation between two professors of medicine (urology) at NYU and a pediatrician from Austin, TX who has just written a sex education book for kids.

The pediatrician made the following points:

1. Texas has “abstinence only” and “abstinence plus” sex education in schools, yet the best data show that 30% of 9th graders and 70% of 12th graders are having sex.
2. 25% of all people over the age of 12 in the US are infected with genital herpes. This is just the tip of the iceberg with respect to STD’s which have a very high prevalence in kids, who are often unaware that they are infected or afraid to seek medical care.
3. Kids who attend religious schools tend to lag behind kids in public schools in the sexual experimentation up until 8th grade. After 8th grade, the two populations are nearly identical.

I know what the Catholic position is on sex and masturbation. I am wondering what people on this forum think of accurate and comprehensive age appropriate sex education?

I knew that kids are having a lot of sex, but I did not realize how widespread STD’s are. The number would indicate that the moral education at home is no match for the availability of sex combine with the teenage hormone levels.

My opinion is that while we should be educating our kids morally, we should also be providing them with complete information on sex, sexuality, and the health issues.

Abstinence only sex-ed does not work. Never has. Never will. Plain and simple.

In my opinion, schools ALL should teach starting in at least middle school all about contraceptives including condoms and the pill. It’s the parents job to give their opinions on contraceptives to their children. And no matter what your feelings are on contraceptives; no one can argue that it would be better for a young girl to get pregnant and have and abortion rather then have him wear a condom.

 

[PatriceA]

Abstinence only sex-ed does not work. Never has. Never will. Plain and simple.

In my opinion, schools ALL should teach starting in at least middle school all about contraceptives including condoms and the pill. It’s the parents job to give their opinions on contraceptives to their children. And no matter what your feelings are on contraceptives; no one can argue that it would be better for a young girl to get pregnant and have and abortion rather then have him wear a condom.

I’m curious, how do you reconcile your opinion about teaching ABC to children as early as middle school, or any age for that matter, with your Catholic faith? And are you automatically assuming that if a young girl gets pregnant that it will end in abortion? There are other options.

Sorry, no way I would want my middle school age child to be taught about ABC and I better have the choice to opt out from any other sex ed I would feel was inappropriate and went against my faith.

 

[andyandely1997]

Abstinence only sex-ed does not work. Never has. Never will. Plain and simple.

In my opinion, schools ALL should teach starting in at least middle school all about contraceptives including condoms and the pill. It’s the parents job to give their opinions on contraceptives to their children. And no matter what your feelings are on contraceptives; no one can argue that it would be better for a young girl to get pregnant and have and abortion rather then have him wear a condom.

And explicit sex education works?

It is not the school’s job to supplant the role of the parent with regards to faith & morals. Just as some people do not want Christianity forced on their kids, many Christians do not desire immorality forced on their children in the schools. Schools need to focus on educating kids in the basics and leave the parenting to the parents.

 

[FOFEBA]

Whoa. Back up a minute. “diversity in sexual orientation” is in no way “sex education.” This would fall under propaganda.

God bless,
Ed

Oops… somebody has been absent from following the fields of psychology and sexuality for at least five decades.

The fact is that sexual orientation varies from person to person. The Catholic position that sexual acts between same sex partners is immoral is fine, but is unrelated to what I am talking about.

If the Catholic Church is teaching that there is no such thing as diversity of sexual orientation, then I misunderstand its teachings. If it is teaching such a thing, then it needs to stop interfering with science, because it has a woeful history of being wrong when it does so.

 

[FOFEBA]

I guess I would disagree with some of the posters here, in that I don’t think that accurate information about sexuality and birth control, based on the best scientific evidence available, is contrary to religious thinking.

I wholeheartedly agree that children should abstain. I respect the position that sex should not be adulterous. Personally, I am a widower, and I abstain. I am not hypocritical in this respect.

Having said all of that, they are children. They will make mistakes. 70% of them are having sex either orally or intercourse by the 12th grade. I repeat that - 70%.

I don’t see how teaching someone how to avoid disease or unwanted pregnancy can be a bad thing. In fact, I would say that anyone who has such knowledge and fails to pass it on to those who don’t have such knowledge is committing an immoral act.

Think of the potential consequences of a good kid who gives in to temptation, and then ends up with a serious disease for life.

 

[tafan]

Abstinence only sex-ed does not work. Never has. Never will. Plain and simple.
.

Not so plain and simple at all. As far as secular abstinence only programs go, I suspect you are correct. I have looked at a couple of these from the public school systems of a couple of states’ who have these programs. I would put little hope in them. At the end of the day, all they can do is try to scare kids from having sex. I think with a lot of teenagers, adults can’t scare them at all.

However, I strongly believe that there are chastity programs offered by good Catholic organizations that do work, if they are done in conjuction with a good Catholic family environment. That has been our experience so far. You have to give kids a positive reason for waiting till marriage, and the Church has that positive reason. To think that teenagers cannot respond to a call to holiness is both demeaning to them, and flys in the face of recent evidence (eg. JP IIs many World Youth Day events).

 

[st_lucy]

I guess I would disagree with some of the posters here, in that I don’t think that accurate information about sexuality and birth control, based on the best scientific evidence available, is contrary to religious thinking.

I wholeheartedly agree that children should abstain. I respect the position that sex should not be adulterous. Personally, I am a widower, and I abstain. I am not hypocritical in this respect.

Having said all of that, they are children. They will make mistakes. 70% of them are having sex either orally or intercourse by the 12th grade. I repeat that - 70%.

I don’t see how teaching someone how to avoid disease or unwanted pregnancy can be a bad thing. In fact, I would say that anyone who has such knowledge and fails to pass it on to those who don’t have such knowledge is committing an immoral act.

Think of the potential consequences of a good kid who gives in to temptation, and then ends up with a serious disease for life.

I am sorry but I don’t know how a parent can feel great or even okay with handing their son/daughter condoms and or pills. These don’t stop diseses or pregnancy. When we give children this we are telling them that we think so little of them and in turn they should think like wise about themselves. I understand that we all make mistakes but that does not mean we hand them the weapon to make that mistake. I will teach my children abstance because I know they are made for better things, and I will continue to teach this.

 

[FOFEBA]

I am sorry but I don’t know how a parent can feel great or even okay with handing their son/daughter condoms and or pills. These don’t stop diseses or pregnancy. When we give children this we are telling them that we think so little of them and in turn they should think like wise about themselves. I understand that we all make mistakes but that does not mean we hand them the weapon to make that mistake. I will teach my children abstance because I know they are made for better things, and I will continue to teach this.

My response to that would be that since we know that 70% of children will engage in sex by the end of high school, and we also know that the hormonal urges are very strong, and we also know that they do not exercise the best judgment, and we know that at least 25% of them will contract an incurable STD, that I would prefer that they not be infected with a disease for life if they decide not to heed your teaching about abstinence.

That seems like a high price to pay for a childhood mistake.

You are incorrect that condoms and other birth control methods don’t work. The one method which has been shown to be the least effective is the “rhythm” method, which implies premeditation and planning to use at all. I think that kids can be very impulsive.

 

[st_lucy]

My response to that would be that since we know that 70% of children will engage in sex by the end of high school, and we also know that the hormonal urges are very strong, and we also know that they do not exercise the best judgment, and we know that at least 25% of them will contract an incurable STD, that I would prefer that they not be infected with a disease for life if they decide not to heed your teaching about abstinence.

That seems like a high price to pay for a childhood mistake.

You are incorrect that condoms and other birth control methods don’t work. The one method which has been shown to be the least effective is the “rhythm” method, which implies premeditation and planning to use at all. I think that kids can be very impulsive.

Well I can tell you that I got pregnant on the pill.

And no one uses the “rhythm” method which you are correct in saying that it does not work, BUT NFP does work, and far better than anyother method.

Also JUST because kids have hormones does not and should not give them the idea that they are no better than a wild animal to act on them. For hundreds and hundreds of years waiting until marrage was used and it worked, sure some didn’t follow but tha was not the majority.

 

[FOFEBA]

Well I can tell you that I got pregnant on the pill.

And no one uses the “rhythm” method which you are correct in saying that it does not work, BUT NFP does work, and far better than anyother method.

Also JUST because kids have hormones does not and should not give them the idea that they are no better than a wild animal to act on them. For hundreds and hundreds of years waiting until marrage was used and it worked, sure some didn’t follow but tha was not the majority.

I don’t agree with you, if you are trying to say that teaching our kids what we know about STD prevention and birth control is treating them as if they were wild animals.

I guess we just disagree. If I understand you, you would prefer them chaste and ignorant, while I would prefer them chaste but well informed.

 

[st_lucy]

I don’t agree with you, if you are trying to say that teaching our kids what we know about STD prevention and birth control is treating them as if they were wild animals.

I guess we just disagree. If I understand you, you would prefer them chaste and ignorant, while I would prefer them chaste but well informed.

My children are well aware of STDS and all the birth control stuff on the market. But I will not lie to them and tell them that the pill or a condome is going to protect them. Having multiple partners is dangerious and when we hand these out like candy to children it is like giving a child a gun and then tell him to be careful. It is negligence and should be considered child abuse.

My child have been taught that they are worth more than a ten minute thrill. They are truly pincessess and princes in my eyes and in the eyes of our Lord and thus they are being taught to act and expected to act.

 

[Jermosh]

Abstinence only education in a school is a dumb idea, they should teach comprehensive sex ed and the parents should give their kids moral education at home.

Yep.

 

[FOFEBA]

My children are well aware of STDS and all the birth control stuff on the market. But I will not lie to them and tell them that the pill or a condome is going to protect them. Having multiple partners is dangerious and when we hand these out like candy to children it is like giving a child a gun and then tell him to be careful. It is negligence and should be considered child abuse.

My child have been taught that they are worth more than a ten minute thrill. They are truly pincessess and princes in my eyes and in the eyes of our Lord and thus they are being taught to act and expected to act.

Well, then we agree. Why do you seem so hostile on the topic, or is that me?

All I have suggested here is that kids should be well informed. This includes the actual facts regarding STD’s, birth control, and the diversity of sexual orientation … in addition to the moral foundation to become an emotionally and spiritually healthy adult.

 

[edwest2]

Abstinence only sex-ed does not work. Never has. Never will. Plain and simple.

In my opinion, schools ALL should teach starting in at least middle school all about contraceptives including condoms and the pill. It’s the parents job to give their opinions on contraceptives to their children. And no matter what your feelings are on contraceptives; no one can argue that it would be better for a young girl to get pregnant and have and abortion rather then have him wear a condom.

Can you cite an authoritative source for your statement?

In the 1960s, it was clearly understood by both sexes: no sex before marriage - period. To convince people otherwise is simply not setting a valid standard. It reinforces the current distorted thinking that nobody can control themselves.

God bless,
Ed

 

[FOFEBA]

I don’t know what her sources were, but I was listening to a pediatrician who practices in Austin, Texas, who just published a sex ed book for kids. The discussion also included two professors of urology at the NYU School of Medicine. Their focus was on male health, and in this particular discussion, younger male health and sexual activity with kids.

When the question of frequency of sexual activity arose, she stated that while the studies vary a bit, that the best numbers in her opinion were that overall 50% of high school kids are having sex. This breaks down to about 30% in 9th grade and about 70% in 12th grade. Sex is defined for this purpose are being oral sex or intercourse.

Being physicians, the principal focus of the discussion was medical and health issues, particularly the prevalence of STD’s, and of course prevention and education.

They were also talking about how the incidence of these diseases has increased as quality of sex education has decreased with the abstinence only programs.

I don’t know if the numbers that she was citing are nationwide, or in Texas only which has a large number of abstinence only programs.

 

[FOFEBA]

One big issue with kids, which has been known for some years now, is that for some reason they do not consider “oral sex” to be “sex”. This has lead to an epidemic of genital herpes (HSV-2) in the oral areas, and oral herpes (HSV-1) in the genital areas. This is a viral infection for life.

With my kids, we went through a period of a few years where apparently I didn’t know anything. I seem to have recovered from that condition, now that they are older. I am not quite sure how much of what we tell them gets through when they are at the age that they want to experiment sexually.

 

[edwest2]

One big issue with kids, which has been known for some years now, is that for some reason they do not consider “oral sex” to be “sex”. This has lead to an epidemic of genital herpes (HSV-2) in the oral areas, and oral herpes (HSV-1) in the genital areas. This is a viral infection for life.

With my kids, we went through a period of a few years where apparently I didn’t know anything. I seem to have recovered from that condition, now that they are older. I am not quite sure how much of what we tell them gets through when they are at the age that they want to experiment sexually.

Can’t the same be said for sex education in a public school? How many kids just listen, half interested, and then go on to do it anyway? Parents should be the role models. Kids may not have much in the way of real world experience but parents should guide them, not their peers.

God bless,
Ed

 

[FOFEBA]

We have a societal problem, in that many parents do not accept the responsibility of educating and raising their kids. They seem to think that it is the school’s responsibility, when it should be a shared endeavor, in my opinion.

In the case of sex education, I think that the motives of the schools is a noble one, they do not want children to suffer the consequences of actions committed out of ignorance, and which parents are often absent in the educational process when they should be present.

With my own kids, my choice was to educate them in the areas that we are talking about, and to do my best to instill values which would make them not want to engage in inappropriate sexual behavior.

I still believe that kids will make mistakes. That is a part of growing up. In the days before contraception, the potential consequences of any sex act were perceived as being more severe. Some kids consider the moral consequences of acts more than others.

We can only do our best as parents, and leave the rest up to our kids and to God. It can be difficult to know what the best course of action is at times.

 

[andyandely1997]

Can you cite an authoritative source for your statement?

In the 1960s, it was clearly understood by both sexes: no sex before marriage - period. To convince people otherwise is simply not setting a valid standard. It reinforces the current distorted thinking that nobody can control themselves.

God bless,
Ed

I agree with Ed. And this “safe sex” propaganda is a bunch of ****. We are helping our kids lower their standards, while at the same time making them feel everything is ok as long as they have “safe sex”, which is an oxymoron. Whatever happened to shame within our society? All of this so-called tolerance of everything, is pulling our culture down, instead of lifting it up. We expect so little of people these days, when they have the potential for so much more.

 

[FOFEBA]

I agree with Ed. And this “safe sex” propaganda is a bunch of ****. We are helping our kids lower their standards, while at the same time making them feel everything is ok as long as they have “safe sex”, which is an oxymoron. Whatever happened to shame within our society? All of this so-called tolerance of everything, is pulling our culture down, instead of lifting it up. We expect so little of people these days, when they have the potential for so much more.

Interesting choice of words, but I’m afraid the only propaganda being suggested is by those who would promote their religious agenda, at the expense of the health and welfare of our children. Propaganda, after-all, is the dissemination of information intended to promote one’s particular agenda, be it political or religious.