Sex with fiancee

  • Thread starter Thread starter Catholic500
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
Right–but in any case, let’s not promise super awesome honeymoon sex to people who wait for marriage.

It might take a while to get to super awesome.
Yeah, sweet awkwardness is probably descriptive of most…
 
Is this the universal teaching concerning sin, or just sexual sin?
I am assuming Boatswain2PA meant IF YOU REPENT then God will forgive you not that God automatically forgives all sexual sin even without repentance.

Not that I agree with his general attitude of “it’s only technically a sin, the vast majority of people commit it, and only a few lucky ones manage not to, good luck to you (but you’ll probably fail)”.

There are actual strategies people can use to reduce sexual temptation, such as not being alone together in one’s apartment on the night of a blizzard, not engage in heavy “petting” or whatever it’s called these days, not prance around naked in front of each other, not get falling down drunk together, etc.
 
I am assuming Boatswain2PA meant IF YOU REPENT then God will forgive you not that God automatically forgives all sexual sin even without repentance.

Not that I agree with his general attitude of “it’s only technically a sin, the vast majority of people commit it, and only a few lucky ones manage not to, good luck to you (but you’ll probably fail)”.

There are actual strategies people can use to reduce sexual temptation, such as not being alone together in one’s apartment on the night of a blizzard, not engage in heavy “petting” or whatever it’s called these days, not prance around naked in front of each other, not get falling down drunk together, etc.
Yeah, there are a lot of things that responsible adult people who love each other can do to avoid falling into bed. Another easy one–keep those feet on the floor!

I know a lot of people buy the idea that sex “just happens” but it really doesn’t.
 
Yeah, there are a lot of things that responsible adult people who love each other can do to avoid falling into bed. Another easy one–keep those feet on the floor!

I know a lot of people buy the idea that sex “just happens” but it really doesn’t.
It also seems many people assume that chastity “just happens” to the lucky few who just happen to have low to nonexistent sex drives in the first place. This attitude fails to acknowledge that chastity is not easy and people do have to make an effort.

The new ascendancy of the “asexuality” movement I think also confuses the issue. I do believe asexuality does exist and that is what Jesus meant when He spoke of men who were “born eunuchs”, I don’t think He was referring to men literally born without their testicles as that is very rare.

However I do suspect some people find “asexuality” alluring because it gives them an excuse not to have sex with everything that moves but not be accused of “suppressing your sex drive unhealthily”.

I think this is certainly the case with “demi-sexuals”, who are only sexually attracted to those they also have an emotional bond with. The underlying assumption is that if they were sexually attracted to those they did not have an emotional bond with, they are somehow obligated to act on those attractions.
 
She ia not atheist now.She is christian now but not very religion.When i create older post she was my girlfriend now she is my fiansee…
 
She is not only girlfriend she is my fiansee before two weeks
 
No. You know that right?
You DO know that or you wouldn’t be asking. Engagement is not a “promissary note” with the agreement to “play now and pay later” and you know that, too. Way too often to be engaged is to set sail for a rocky shore and the boat flounders. Marriage is a serious commitment that is predicated on engagement-a time to assess and get to know one another in a deeper sense-not in the sexual sense. If you really didn’t know the answer you would have asked your priest, rater than asking it here. Peace.
 
She ia not atheist now.She is christian now but not very religion.When i create older post she was my girlfriend now she is my fiansee…
So are you asking us because she wants to have sex and you want to know what to tell her to explain why not?
 
She is not only girlfriend she is my fiansee before two weeks
She needs to be entirely free to say “no” on your wedding day, and you do, too. That freedom is greatly facilitated by waiting until marriage to act as if you’re married.

More to the point, you are talking about giving yourself permission to commit a mortal sin on the presumption that you will be forgiven if you “repent” later.

Presumption is a very serious compounding sin, as it indicates hardness of heart towards the Lord. It is very dangerous to encourage someone towards presumption.
 
So are you asking us because she wants to have sex and you want to know what to tell her to explain why not?
Why not? For the same reason that the OP will not be having sex with some other woman he unfortunately “falls in love with” after he marries.

Sex within marriage, period, forsaking all others, for life.

What if, after you are married, one of you (the rhetorical “you,” not you personally) is sick or disabled, and can no longer have sex? What if you have to be separated for long periods of time? Will you be willing to go without sex out of love for each other–and fidelity to your vows, if you do not “feel in love”–rather than seeking other companionship outside of your marriage because you would rather hurt someone you love than go without sex?

She needs to think about that, and whether she is willing to make sacrifices for the sake of love. So do you. Now is the time to find out if you both have the fiber to carry intention into action, even when you are very tempted and others tell you to look out for yourself alone.
 
Church teaching is, of course, to wait until your wedding night.

We all sin. Some of us more than others, but we all sin. And I would suggest that the vast majority off married Catholics “sinned” in that manner before they were married.

My MIL is an intensely devout Catholic woman, and matriarch of a huge and incredibly loving family. I don’t know a woman who is more loving, giving, and CATHOLIC than she is.

But, funny thing…my wife (the oldest of 10 kids) was born (at full term) about 8 months after my FIL and MIL were married. Twice I have had the opportunity to watch the hilarious expressions on my younger brother/sister in laws faces when they had to do the math on that one…

If you DO step over that ledge, don’t worry, God still loves you and will forgive you.

However, I suggest that you try your best to save it for the wedding night. It WILL make that night, and your marriage, even more special.

Good luck!
Ugh…I hate it when people do this. The “nine months” of pregnancy is way oversimplified. Pregnancy is 40 weeks including the two weeks BEFORE actual conception. Just counting months is far from precisely accurate.

In the situation you describe, there’s a decent chance the child was conceived on the wedding night or shortly thereafter.

Our first son was born about nine months after our wedding (completely full term) and we were married for an entire MONTH before getting pregnant. Everyone thinks he’s a honeymoon baby, but…is not so. :rolleyes:

All is to say, your MIL and FIL did not necessarily commit the sin of fornication, even though it looks like they did.

It is a sin, OP. Please wait for marriage.
 
Ugh…I hate it when people do this. The “nine months” of pregnancy is way oversimplified. Pregnancy is 40 weeks including the two weeks BEFORE actual conception. Just counting months is far from precisely accurate.

In the situation you describe, there’s a decent chance the child was conceived on the wedding night or shortly thereafter.

Our first son was born about nine months after our wedding (completely full term) and we were married for an entire MONTH before getting pregnant. Everyone thinks he’s a honeymoon baby, but…is not so. :rolleyes:
Yeah. Our oldest was 8+ pounds at 37.5 weeks gestation. 37 weeks is full term.
 
Op, you have heard from all the posters here that you need to wait until marriage to have relations because it’s a sin. Being engaged is pre marriage.

Marital relations are blessed by God. To have relations before the marriage leaves God out of the equation, and is just filling carnal desires. There is no dignity or holiness to this, and it is a sin against the purity of His creation.This is the short answer…there are many more reasons why this is sinful.

Temptations of the flesh are the hardest to resist, and the devil uses any means to confuse people to sin. fasting and prayer will help you to resist not only this temptation, but many others…Trust God to guide and help.
 
Why are the questions about well-known doctrines coming from the guys with less than 20 posts?

Which emoticon belongs: :confused: or :rolleyes:

Only they know…and they haven’t been posting here.
 
We want to marriage after 8-10 years because we are yoo youngs…
 
We want to marriage after 8-10 years because we are yoo youngs…
Ok anton. So you have a very big challenge. If you feel you are too young to get married, guess what else you are too young for?
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top