Sexless marriage .. help?

  • Thread starter Thread starter Ctactor
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
Thank you. What’s funny about the money aspect. I do well… not a million dollars a year … but above average. I do clean and love spending time with my boys to have myvwife rekax … but that’s still not enough. I simply think the devil is having his way with us. Or God is testing my faith
 
Last edited:
I do truly love my wife … and I help out in all aspects the best I can. I need a miracle. Can you please pray for us. As I’m praying for all who are advising me here.
 
Ctactor said:
I need a miracle.
Click to expand...
I’ve seen you say this a few times. What do you really mean by it? Miracles rarely happen by themselves. Like any elite athlete, accomplished scholar, leader, etc., the hard work was done behind the scenes out of the view of most people.
 
I like that one ! Could she be going thru early menopause? Agree there is something much deeper going on. Could she (please don’t be offended) be reliving something abusive and it’s only now coming to the fore, perhaps from before you ever knew her which she has never fully dealt with?
 
I mean that I’ve tried everything humanly possible. I now need God’s help. I’m lost
 
Are you part of a men’s group at church? Are you getting support from somewhere within your parish ?
 
No to all your questions. I already mentioned here. I couldn’t keep up with my wife … when we were first married … and we honestly enjoyed the act …I’m lost now on what to think of what happened
 
It’s a funny one. Could be that someone is influencing her with this false belief about age and sex?
Do you mind me asking if it’s possible she has been unfaithful in deed or thought?
None of the options are great but focus on the blessings you’re here and you are married and there’s hope xxx
 
My wife is a very faithful woman. Religious also. But sexual relations not for older marrried couples.
 
Wow! I certainly relate. I have been married for 15 years to a man and we have NEVER had sex! I’ve been married before and he said I should have already had enough sex! Just a note, he’s NEVER had sex in his entire life. He is 67 and I am a few years younger. Other than prayer/counseling I’m not sure what the answer is. I’ve had sex in a loving marriage before and there’s nothing like sex in the Spirit. In every other way he is a good husband. He does, however. have a lot of Aspergers traits. Sex is definitely not for the young. The weird thing is my husband’s parts definetly work and I’ve caught him pleasuring himself. He said he was doing it for me so he could get it working… Anyway, I totally sympathize with you and hope things work out for you!
 
Please don’t be offended I didn’t mean that to be insulting. Just seems so out of the blue . Is that something she was taught as a child perhaps? I was - I was told that sexual urges were essentially ‘a male thing’ and that men were always in need of sex. Both of which aren’t true! But my mother is old school and of her generation and that’s what I believed. There is definitely opinion still about even amongst faithful Catholics that sex is limited in some ways within marriage when the opposite is true. Obvs not talking about non catechism stuff before anyone jumps in!
 
Last edited:
You mentioned that financial issues seem to worry her a lot. Could she be hiding a fear of a pregnancy and all that would entail emotionally and financially? Just throwing that out there for consideration. I, too, wonder where she came up with sex only being for younger couples. While our sex drive does tend to settle down a bit as we age, it does not disappear. It can often be even more pleasurable and meaningful when we are older. I’m 66 and enjoy it very much with my hubby even though it isn’t as often as when we were in our 20s!
 
My wife worries about things that she shouldn’t. I do above average financially . She is just by nature stesssed and anxious about things. It runs in her family. We both enjoyed the connection … i couldn’t keep up at times. That has all changed. Thanks for the kind words. If yo can remember me and my wife in your prayers. I’ll do the same. Thank you
 
I’ve been through this and only recently have things got better. With the help and intercession of Fr.John Hardon, things r better but I must be humble because at any point things can go bad.

If there’s is grave reason to postpone pregnancy you can practice NFP, I recommend Creightom model.

St.Thomas talks about the this in the Summa:The opposite of lust is not found in many, since men are more inclined to pleasure. Yet the contrary vice is comprised under insensibility, and occurs in one who has such a dislike for sexual intercourse as not to pay the marriage debt.

It’s grave matter to reject relations for this long. So many gave such good advice. If you need help PM me.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top