Sexual assault & morality

[acat]

I will try to ask this as delicately as possible to hopefully avoid offending anyone, I hope it’s not confusing…

Say a young woman was involved with a boyfriend in ways that were sexually inappropriate. This woman had no idea that sexual activity (outside of actual sex) was immoral. She intended to avoid intercourse until marriage, and made that clear to the man, but did not comprehend that certain touching/sleeping in the same bed/etc. would still be sinful, so she allowed it. She did not want to engage in that activity but felt unable to say no (power/violence dynamic & a mental illness) and sort of enjoyed some of it, at least physically. Same boyfriend repeatedly sexually assaulted this woman, but she had naively put herself in a vulnerable position by allowing the touching, sleeping side by side, etc. Is she at fault for being assaulted etc.? Is the man at fault for ‘rape’ or is he being too tempted by the woman?

Now, say this woman developed severe PTSD as a result of the multiple assaults. Say she feels the need to relive & act out the scenarios that happened in the past (masturbation, I guess, but, not trying to achieve pleasure) – kind of the way little kids crashed block towers after 9/11. Would this be considered sinful? Mortal sin? How much culpability does a woman have for being violated and its aftereffects? Has she even been ‘raped’ technically, or did she unknowingly consent?

 

[puzzleannie]

I . Is she at fault for being assaulted etc.? Is the man at fault for ‘rape’ or is he being too tempted by the woman?

?

nobody is ever at fault if they are victim of any type of assault

the man is at fault if he intentionally seduced an innocent woman by exercising deceit and power. He is guilty of rape as defined by the criminal code, but since if she told her story as it is related here most likely it would be defined as consensual, that would be hard to prosecute. If she was a minor in law age or because of developmental delay it might very well be defined as statutory rape. Those who care for her should help her consult a lawyer in that case, and make sure she is getting professional care for the harmful results of her experience.

 

[DominicStephen]

Say a young woman was involved with a boyfriend in ways that were sexually inappropriate. This woman had no idea that sexual activity (outside of actual sex) was immoral. She intended to avoid intercourse until marriage, and made that clear to the man, but did not comprehend that certain touching/sleeping in the same bed/etc. would still be sinful, so she allowed it. She did not want to engage in that activity but felt unable to say no (power/violence dynamic & a mental illness) and sort of enjoyed some of it, at least physically. Same boyfriend repeatedly sexually assaulted this woman, but she had naively put herself in a vulnerable position by allowing the touching, sleeping side by side, etc.** Is she at fault for being assaulted etc.? Is the man at fault for ‘rape’ or is he being too tempted by the woman?**

I had to read that bit a couple of times to make sure I read that bit right…

As-sault:
1.A physical attack

• his imprisonment for an assault on the film director
• sexual assaults

2.An act, criminal or tortious, that threatens physical harm to a person, whether or not actual harm is done

• he appeared in court charged with assault

3.A military attack or raid on an enemy position

• troops began an assault on the city
• an assault boat

4.A strong verbal attack

• the assault on the party’s tax policies

5.A concerted attempt to do something demanding

• a winter assault on Mt. Everest.

Now I’m going to let you work out the answer to your own question.

 

[Debora123]

I will try to ask this as delicately as possible to hopefully avoid offending anyone, I hope it’s not confusing…

Say a young woman was involved with a boyfriend in ways that were sexually inappropriate. This woman had no idea that sexual activity (outside of actual sex) was immoral. She intended to avoid intercourse until marriage, and made that clear to the man, but did not comprehend that certain touching/sleeping in the same bed/etc. would still be sinful, so she allowed it. She did not want to engage in that activity but felt unable to say no (power/violence dynamic & a mental illness) and sort of enjoyed some of it, at least physically. Same boyfriend repeatedly sexually assaulted this woman, but she had naively put herself in a vulnerable position by allowing the touching, sleeping side by side, etc. Is she at fault for being assaulted etc.? Is the man at fault for ‘rape’ or is he being too tempted by the woman?

Man’s fault.

Now, say this woman developed severe PTSD as a result of the multiple assaults. Say she feels the need to relive & act out the scenarios that happened in the past (masturbation, I guess, but, not trying to achieve pleasure) – kind of the way little kids crashed block towers after 9/11. Would this be considered sinful? Mortal sin? How much culpability does a woman have for being violated and its aftereffects? Has she even been ‘raped’ technically, or did she unknowingly consent?

Her culpability is definitely at least lessened. But how much? Only God knows the woman’s heart and her culpability. It is in God’s hands and not our place to judge or claim to know.

As for the last question, we would need more specific detail to know for sure if she was technically raped. But if I could give my guess, I would say probably yes.

 

[OscarsMama]

I think that the insecurity and confusion is part of the assault. Regardless of WHO’S fault it is or what exactly happened, it seems like the woman (from who’s point of view you are speaking) needs to seek out some help. This will help her determine how what happened is impacting her and what to do about it. That is my very nice way of saying that she needs to seek professional counseling ASAP.

 

[PatriceA]

I think that the insecurity and confusion is part of the assault. Regardless of WHO’S fault it is or what exactly happened, it seems like the woman (from who’s point of view you are speaking) needs to seek out some help. This will help her determine how what happened is impacting her and what to do about it. That is my very nice way of saying that she needs to seek professional counseling ASAP.

Professional counseling and a priest, or a female spiritual director, if she’s not comfortable talking to a male about the abuse. Only they can give her the advice and treatment that she needs.