I’m not a Dominican… but am a student at a Dominican University… and I am an expert in consecrated life law since that is my specialization. Not to toot my horn but just to let you know where I’m coming from.
Your friend. She needs help. Rape is extremely damaging to a woman, and for the sake of her own well being, she needs to heal emotionally, physically, spiritually before even thinking about further vocational discernment. Why? Because no one who is very wounded in this way is really capable of peaceful and thorough discernment until significant healing is done. This is applicable to all vocations. She needs to be healed if she’s called to marriage or consecrated life. But first and foremost, because she is a person of great and intrinsic worth, she needs to be healed for her own sake (not for the sake of discerning)!
Now, if she was a virgin prior to this attack… she remains a virgin. Rape and assault are not voluntary on the part of the victim, and FREE consent is required to lose one’s virginity. Forced “consent” doesn’t count. If she was chaste prior to, she is chaste after the attack. Again, for the same reasons. Involuntary sex (forced) does not destroy one’s virginity in the eyes of God/Church nor does it destroy purity if one is not a virgin.
As far as the Dominicans are concerned… this is personal, internal forum information. They don’t need to be told (if she has a baby, well, that obviously would preclude her from joining). Oftentimes, it is best NOT to tell people these things. The only obligation your friend would have towards the Dominicans if she were to enter, is to be sufficiently healed for community life prior to joining. And this means among other things, she needs to be open to marriage (hard for some victims) and see the goodness of sex, and be open to the idea of children… Convent life is not a place of escape. By the way, this would be the same obligation if she were to get married. She needs to be healed first so that she can enter a serious covenant with obligations that a lot of victims cannot meet without counseling and healing.
Your friend is not tainted. She is a beautiful soul loved very much by God and this was done AGAINST her will. Are you aware of the fact that many virgin martyrs were raped and are considered virgins? My understanding is Romans could not execute virgins, so if they weren’t sent to a brothel first, they were raped by the soldiers prior to martyrdom. I think they also couldn’t execute pregnant women, which is why Perpetua and her friend hung out in prison until after they delivered their babies. The Roman-pagan understanding of rape was that it DID taint the woman. The Catholic understanding of rape was that it was an unjust act against the body of the woman, done without her consent, and in no way tainting her.
She may be wondering if she is guilty of mortal sin. No. No. No!!! She’s not. Please let her know because a lot of women who have been abused feel guilty over the attacker’s sin. Some have been driven to suicide because of the erroneous thought that they are worthless. Again, this is extremely important. If she doesn’t already know this, please inform her.
As far as psychological evaluations are concerned… yes, she MAY be asked to bring this up, but she has the right to remain silent. It is her internal forum material and she needs to know her rights in this arena. Many dioceses and convents are abusing people with the psychological evaluations.
To sum this all up… she should work with a professional counselor, preferrably Catholic until she achieves substantial healing. She does not have to disclose this information to ANYONE else. Future husband, future convent… it is up to her, and I would recommend it only if she hasn’t fully healed and needs more help.
