Sexual Sin: Why so appealing?

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Why are the physical pleasures and allure of illicit sex so much more intense than the sacramental, procreative sex of the marital embrace with the mother of one’s children? Clearly an affair with the gorgrous secretary at work is immoral, but why is the thought of it so appealing to the reproductive system and “animal” brain of man?

Strip clubs, one night stands with attractive strangers… etc. Why is something so wrong capable of generating such incredible excitement? I’ve never acted out any of this, but it isn’t necessary to go to Europe to know something about it… if ya know what I mean!

Ladies, I suspect you experience this is a slightly different way but the concept is the same. I’ve been wondering about this for a long time.

🤷
 
I believe it is because of the fall of man. That IT is the human stain. I pray for purity of my mind and my soul; and I say prayers of thanks when I find my eye ‘wandering’- thanks for giving me my senses and my body that I can appreciate the opposite sex. Those two things have given me the personal strength to live beyond the temptations of the flesh; and to appreciate and enjoy my spouse as deeply as I do. But, you’re right, we are so drawn to the other side. I would like one day to find a ‘cure’ for the human weakness, if for no other reason than to cure the pedophiles in the world. They hurt so many innocent children and it seems there is no effective cure or treatment.
 
  1. “easy” pleasure
  2. you are (or seem to be) in control, you don’t have to care about your spouse, just yourself
  3. escape from reality
 
I would say its due to the nature of animals.

The male of this species homosapian is capable of (name removed by moderator)regnating many different females.

Society and evolution have played a roll in changing the behaviour of our males. Now it can quite often be more benificial to have one lover whome bears children. That are brought up in a family unit looking out for each other. However our base primal instinct is to have many different lovers to carry our gene pool and ensure it lasts into the next generation. I think this is why men, tend to have these urges.
 
Philotheatoo said:
I believe it is because of the fall of man. That IT is the human stain. I pray for purity of my mind and my soul; and I say prayers of thanks when I find my eye ‘wandering’- thanks for giving me my senses and my body that I can appreciate the opposite sex. Those two things have given me the personal strength to live beyond the temptations of the flesh; and to appreciate and enjoy my spouse as deeply as I do. But, you’re right, we are so drawn to the other side. I would like one day to find a ‘cure’ for the human weakness, if for no other reason than to cure the pedophiles in the world. They hurt so many innocent children and it seems there is no effective cure or treatment.
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What especially bothers me is ths fact that the child molester who is about to violate a brand new victim experiences the same excitement, anticipation and physical pleasure as the seventeen year-old (fully consenting) couple in the back seat of daddy’s car.

I believe that even science has bearly scratched the surface on gaining an understanding of human sexuality. For this reason, this is probably why the Church moves so slowly in this area of morality.
 
Squishy said:
I would say its due to the nature of animals.

The male of this species homosapian is capable of (name removed by moderator)regnating many different females.

Society and evolution have played a roll in changing the behaviour of our males. Now it can quite often be more benificial to have one lover whome bears children. That are brought up in a family unit looking out for each other. However our base primal instinct is to have many different lovers to carry our gene pool and ensure it lasts into the next generation. I think this is why men, tend to have these urges.
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It’s also interesting that the Praying Mantis, black widow spider and God knows how many other creatures have been known to kill their mates after the sex act not unlike the homicidal rapist who murders his victim in the dark parking lot. Nature seems to have an incredibly dark side to it sometimes.

:confused:
 
It is so appealing in order that man would have a challenge to master himself and develop within him the character that Jesus, Paul and the rest of the celibates for the kingdom of heaven maintained.
 
Our belief in God changes how we see our actions, actions that lead us to our good or away from it toward purely "sense"ual “good”, for as through lack of faith there is no other good to be had. The discomfort of sacrifice has no meaning in light of atheism. This is why “blessed are those who have not seen yet believe”
 
The drive is strong. Lots of things like pride and all sorts of coveting are involved. Plenty of room for traps. People think they are “confirm” or “affirming” themselves, finding appreciation, proving they can do this or that, they are also fit and appealing and they can “get it”. Besides, so many people badly want to be loved and badly misunderstand that, getting sex as a sort of replacement that numbs them down but doesn’t give true satisfaction.
 
TLM08 said:
Why are the physical pleasures and allure of illicit sex so much more intense than the sacramental, procreative sex of the marital embrace with the mother of one’s children? Clearly an affair with the gorgrous secretary at work is immoral, but why is the thought of it so appealing to the reproductive system and “animal” brain of man?

Strip clubs, one night stands with attractive strangers… etc. Why is something so wrong capable of generating such incredible excitement? I’ve never acted out any of this, but it isn’t necessary to go to Europe to know something about it… if ya know what I mean!

Ladies, I suspect you experience this is a slightly different way but the concept is the same. I’ve been wondering about this for a long time.

🤷
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TL

Your post provokes me.
I am a woman and I have a completely different experience than you. I feel nothing exiting with the thought of having a one night stand… It repulses me. I dont even go there in my mind… and if I acidentally think of a man I am in love with in a sexual way I direct my mind at other things.Why… because whereas sex is interesting its not interesting anymore if you make it trivial or dirty. Do you also find abortion and sexual disease or being cheated on by your wife alluring?
As for the Christian men I have spoken to. They did not feel “the allure of illicit sex was so much more intense than the sacramental”. On the contrary they felt a great longing for the EXTREME intensety there is in giving one self completely, purely honestly and 100 percent faithfully to their one and only love.
I dont know what you have been reading or watching to get you the idea that living out your sexuality in ways that are more base than that of animals is alluring… but you better start thinking in new ways or not get married.
I recently got off a conversation with a male friend who told me he had had very limited sexual experience and that it neither then nor now(thinking back) gave him any pleasure because he simply had no peace and no joy when he was outside the marital embrace using and being used in a way so far from the love that we all long to experience.

What are women to you? have you ever truly loved? and no, I dont understand you at all.

:confused:
 
TLM08 said:
Why are the physical pleasures and allure of illicit sex so much more intense than the sacramental, procreative sex of the marital embrace with the mother of one’s children?
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This is a conclusion, not a question. It is the logical fallacy of “begging the question.”
 
I can agree with most here…the best experience of sex is married, open to life, baby-making sex. Can I get an Amen? That’s what it was designed for.

Unfortunately, in our messed up society, sex is not used for baby making very much…so that drive ends up being expressed in other ways.

It truly is very expensive to raise children in today’s America…esp those with no extended family support nearby.
 
I pray that we won’t just think about ourselves and how blessed we and we will stand up and find a way to stop the escalation of immoral sex that we are saturated with. If you could see the alarming rate of increase in reports of pedophelia; and our lack of inability to do anything to stop it you would be as concerned:gopray2: as I am for our fate.
 
GraceDK said:
TL

Your post provokes me.
I am a woman and I have a completely different experience than you. …

Do you also find abortion and sexual disease or being cheated on by your wife alluring?

As for the Christian men I have spoken to. They did not feel “the allure of illicit sex was so much more intense than the sacramental”…

What are women to you? have you ever truly loved? and no, I dont understand you at all.

:confused:
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I would not expect you or any other a woman to understand the experiece of being a man and what it is like to keep our male sexual nature under control.

I am speaking strictly about the physical allure. There is no peace in illicit sex whatsoever. Peace can be only found in the love of God.

Men rarely will admit to their wives the darker reality of male sexual nature so it doesn’t surprise me that you believe that good christian men do not have a dark side to their sexual nature.

Sexual disease and infidlity are an unfortunate part of life and proof that sexual sin has consequences.

Abortion is by far the single biggest crime committed against a holy and loving God in the history of humanity. Truly God must weep with every single brutal murderous act committed against his little ones who just want to be at peace as they grow in their mother’s womb. He will repay those who are involved in promoting abortion. I believe there is a special corner in Hell for those who do this for financial gain.

What are women to me? Women to me are truly God’s most beauiful and wonderful creatures and the perfect gift from the God the father to man. Women give life. Women give love. Women civilize the savage side of mankind and give depth and purpose to life. There are no mountains, sunsets or anything else that occurs in nature that can match the beauty of a woman.

Have I ever truly loved? Can any among us truly know what marital love as God intended look like? Will our fallen nature even allow us to achieve it in this lifetime? In my limited human understanding of love, I can honestly say that I love my wife dearly. I’ve been with her for 30 years now. She has been a real light in my life. Every day I thank God for her.

As a woman, it would be impossible for you to understand me. To tell you the truth, one of my goals in life is for ME to understand me!

:cool:
 
It’s like the thrill we would get sneaking away from school in the middle of the day to go downtown and mess around for a while.

It’s the forbiddeness of it, the defiance. It gives us a rush. A testimony to how immature and childish we are. Having responsibilities of our own cures us of it, I think.
 
TLM08:

Sexual sins, themselves a separate class, are unique in that they differ from all the other temptations.

It is the only temptation that get’s assistance from a programmed physical drugging(hormones). This I always felt calls for a special handling on the culpability scale. Given all non-enduced mortal temptations are a scale of 10, (ie:stealing,blashemy,etc,etc), those Sexual sins that can be classed as mortal should be no more than an 8 in severity.

This remedy gains justification from a practical fact as well.
Given that not one human being is favored over another in the system, then we can apply the universal judicial precept:

"no one is advantaged or disadvantaged in the choice of principles by their natural or social endowments."
(Rawls, A Theory of Justice)

We know then that a mature adult would be disadvantaged when brought to trial for committing a sexual mortal sin. Two facts are immediatly in his favor.

1/ Under the same judicial sphere, an immature human cannot ever be accused of this sin.
2/ Circumstances(hormones) of his physical being marked him now at his age as a potential candidate for sexual temptation, making his case one involving extenuating circumstances.

So we can see that a dispensation of sorts is warranted the mature adult to bring him once again in line with the judicial reality of the human collective has a whole.

But who cares anyway. 🤷

Andy
 
TLM08 said:
Why are the physical pleasures and allure of illicit sex so much more intense than the sacramental, procreative sex of the marital embrace with the mother of one’s children? Clearly an affair with the gorgrous secretary at work is immoral, but why is the thought of it so appealing to the reproductive system and “animal” brain of man?

Strip clubs, one night stands with attractive strangers… etc. Why is something so wrong capable of generating such incredible excitement? I’ve never acted out any of this, but it isn’t necessary to go to Europe to know something about it… if ya know what I mean!

Ladies, I suspect you experience this is a slightly different way but the concept is the same. I’ve been wondering about this for a long time.

🤷
Click to expand...
Why was it so difficult for Adam and Eve to resist the fruit from the one tree in the middle of the garden?
 
mark_a said:
Why was it so difficult for Adam and Eve to resist the fruit from the one tree in the middle of the garden?
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Was it really about fruit? Or was it about something else Adam and Eve did…

Who knows… maybe it really was about apples.

🤷 😃
 
Sexual sin is appealing because it appeals to our lower appetites, that is, to our animal passions. This is seen in the animal kingdom:
 
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