Shorts at Mass??

[Oneofthewomen]

**

Go to a funeral Mass or a wedding Mass and you will never see anyone in shorts. People would be offended. It just wouldn’t happen. I find that interesting.

On the one hand I quietly laugh at those who wear suits/ties and get upset with anyone else who does not follow their style choice. On the other hand people say that God is not judging them because they wear shorts to Mass YET the very fact they do does change the atmosphere of the Mass – to the negative.

Regarding the bolded part-
Never say never!! I have been to a couple of weddings where the clothing choices of some guests left a lot to be desired.
Including a “formal affair” where one of the grooms best friends (who was not in the wedding party) showed up in black jeans with a “tuxedo t-shirt”.

I am a mid-level manager and interview many people each month.
I could go on for pages about how people dress inappropriately for job interviews,
so it is not just in Church.

IMHO, this is more about our American attitude of "I can do whatever I want, and if you if you say anything to me you are being intolerant.

It brings to mind an experience I had a few years ago.
I was the was helping out at the late Mass,
which is usually the Mass the the youth group attends and helps out at as EM’sHC and lectors.
One young lady came in and went to get her cross (our EMHC where crosses that designate if they are cup or bread ministers).
It was July, and quite hot & humid.
She was wearing skin-tight denim capri pants, with a skin-tight, sleeve-less, mid-riff bearing top with no bra!
After consulting with Father, I told the young lady that unless she had someting to cover herself up with,
there was ***NO WAY ***she was going to be a EMHC dressed the way she was. Father even offered the young lady a nice summer sweater that his sister had left in his office to cover up with.

The young lady refused and stormed out of Church.
After Mass, the Pastoral Associate (not a priest, but a lay-woman)
who did have some authority over said priest as he was a newly ordained intern,
and she had worked for said parish for nearly 20 years, proceeded to give him, and me, quite the tongue lashing for being “mean”.
I was told under no circumstances was I allowed to remove someone from their ministry because I did not like how they were dressed
(nevermind the fact that I did not do this on my own, only after consulting the presiding priest, AND that is was this PA who actually wrote the “dress-code” that this young woman violated)
and that if I inflicted my "over the top, conservative views"** on someone again, I would be asked to step down from my ministry.

I often wonder what would have happened if the priest & I allowed this young lady to be a EMHC?
Would the phone have rung off the hook the next day
with people ranting about the scandalous nature of her dress?
And would him & I both been taken to task for “not doing something about it”?

NOTE:
**this statement had both the priest & I laugh out loud- in those days I was not known for being at all orthodox and/or conservative, by any stretch of the imagination!!

 

[MissRose73]

At my work place, many women expose more than I think is appropriate even though we never see our customers face to face (they are supported phone or electronic means). Unfortunately, the rules about cleavage showing (women), chest hair (men) and very tight/revealing clothes are not heavily enforced. I sometimes see the same thing at Mass too, and the clergy need to speak up.

Those who do ministries should also be appropriately dressed. I am not asking for a business suit type outfit but shorts are not appropriate. Capris on women with nice shoes and shirt are ok as long as they are modest, not revealing, and not tight during the summer months. Men should not go up to read or assist with giving out Communion wearing shorts of any length. Business casual clothing for anyone over the age 5/6 is appropriate for Mass, and definitely no shorts, tanks, spaghetti straps, strapless, vulgar shirts, sport type outfits like track suits (unless you have no time to change after practice/competition before Mass), no revealing items, nothing tight, minimal/no cleavage (women) and little/no chest hair exposure (men)…

 

[TrueLight]

At my work place, many women expose more than I think is appropriate even though we never see our customers face to face (they are supported phone or electronic means). Unfortunately, the rules about cleavage showing (women), chest hair (men) and very tight/revealing clothes are not heavily enforced. I sometimes see the same thing at Mass too, and the clergy need to speak up.

Those who do ministries should also be appropriately dressed. I am not asking for a business suit type outfit but shorts are not appropriate. Capris on women with nice shoes and shirt are ok as long as they are modest, not revealing, and not tight during the summer months. Men should not go up to read or assist with giving out Communion wearing shorts of any length. Business casual clothing for anyone over the age 5/6 is appropriate for Mass, and definitely no shorts, tanks, spaghetti straps, strapless, vulgar shirts, sport type outfits like track suits (unless you have no time to change after practice/competition before Mass), no revealing items, nothing tight, minimal/no cleavage (women) and little/no chest hair exposure (men)…

 

[I_Thirst]

There was a time when women wearing pants was considered scandalous, indecent, immodest, etc. One of the reasons were that pants were considered men’s clothing and women weren’t allowed to wear men’s clothing. Pope Nicholas I had something to say about this …

“Whether you or your women wear or do not wear trousers neither impedes your salvation nor leads to any increase of your virtue.”

Source

I think his comments apply to other items of clothing (including shorts) as well.

It is a shame that Clothing Crusaders get so worked up over what other folks are wearing at Mass, for there is something else going on at Mass that merits and demands our greater attention.

 

[MtnDwellar]

It is a shame that Clothing Crusaders get so worked up over what other folks are wearing at Mass, for there is something else going on at Mass that merits and demands our greater attention.

 

[Stylites]

I often wonder what would have happened if the priest & I allowed this young lady to be a EMHC?
Would the phone have rung off the hook the next day
with people ranting about the scandalous nature of her dress?

As I heard a priest say on EWTN recently regarding immodest dress, In Mass we pray the Our Father to lead us not into temptation, while we dress in Mass so as to lead others into temptation, and there’s a disconnect there.

 

[EasterJoy]

Modesty is always required, but different clothing means different things in different places (and, in some extreme cases, in different weather). In Rome, dress as the Romans do. If you’re in Hawaii, make an effort to dress as the locals do there for an occasion of solemnity. If that can include a nice pair of shorts, then that’s OK.

Still, if the local custom is that shorts aren’t appropriate for a solemn occasion, then try not to wear them to Mass, not even on Saturday night. If your clothes are modest but in worse repair or less appropriate in terms of formality than you would like, and you are stuck with nothing else to wear, come to Mass. Try to do better when you can do better. Pray for the people who stare at you.

If you have family members who won’t come to Mass if you make them get out of their shorts or jeans and wear something dressier, then do keep trying to get them to put on something nicer, but don’t keep them from coming to Mass. Some battles are more important than others. When you’ve done your best, you’ve done your best.

If you see other people not dressed as you would like, I think perhaps there is a time to be glad you are not in charge of dressing everybody, and let it go. St. James noted that sometimes a poor man will come in shabby clothes. He made it extremely clear that the poorly dressed ought to be treated as well as anyone else, lest we “distinctions among yourselves and become judges with evil designs.” (James 2:4)

If you’re in charge of altar servers or EMHCs, something like that, then that can fall into your realm of responsibility, depending on the parish and the pastor. In that case, it is your responsibility to get help for those who cannot make the dress code on their own.

 

[Bearontherun]

Modesty is always required, but different clothing means different things in different places (and, in some extreme cases, in different weather). In Rome, dress as the Romans do. If you’re in Hawaii, make an effort to dress as the locals do there for an occasion of solemnity. If that can include a nice pair of shorts, then that’s OK.

Still, if the local custom is that shorts aren’t appropriate for a solemn occasion, then try not to wear them to Mass, not even on Saturday night. If your clothes are modest but in worse repair or less appropriate in terms of formality than you would like, and you are stuck with nothing else to wear, come to Mass. Try to do better when you can do better. Pray for the people who stare at you.

If you have family members who won’t come to Mass if you make them get out of their shorts or jeans and wear something dressier, then do keep trying to get them to put on something nicer, but don’t keep them from coming to Mass. Some battles are more important than others. When you’ve done your best, you’ve done your best.

If you see other people not dressed as you would like, I think perhaps there is a time to be glad you are not in charge of dressing everybody, and let it go. St. James noted that sometimes a poor man will come in shabby clothes. He made it extremely clear that the poorly dressed ought to be treated as well as anyone else, lest we “distinctions among yourselves and become judges with evil designs.” (James 2:4)

If you’re in charge of altar servers or EMHCs, something like that, then that can fall into your realm of responsibility, depending on the parish and the pastor. In that case, it is your responsibility to get help for those who cannot make the dress code on their own.

Very well said

This thread has helped me decide to do my best to dress reverently while at the same time not concerning myself with the dress of others.

 

[I_Thirst]

St. James noted that sometimes a poor man will come in shabby clothes. He made it extremely clear that the poorly dressed ought to be treated as well as anyone else, lest we “distinctions among yourselves and become judges with evil designs.” (James 2:4)

Excellent! Here’s the passage with the preceding lines …

1 My brothers, show no partiality as you adhere to the faith in our glorious Lord Jesus Christ.

2 For if a man with gold rings on his fingers and in fine clothes comes into your assembly, and a poor person in shabby clothes also comes in,

3 and you pay attention to the one wearing the fine clothes and say, “Sit here, please,” while you say to the poor one, “Stand there,” or “Sit at my feet,”

4 have you not made distinctions among yourselves and become judges with evil designs?

Of course shabby clothes can still be decent, though those who favor the fine clothed will find it opprobious and cast that shabbily clothed soul into a haberdasher’s hell. Perhaps Richard Cory is better suited to the dictates of the decency squad?

 

[Stylites]

Excellent! Here’s the passage with the preceding lines …

1 My brothers, show no partiality as you adhere to the faith in our glorious Lord Jesus Christ.

2 For if a man with gold rings on his fingers and in fine clothes comes into your assembly, and a poor person in shabby clothes also comes in,

3 and you pay attention to the one wearing the fine clothes and say, “Sit here, please,” while you say to the poor one, “Stand there,” or “Sit at my feet,”

4 have you not made distinctions among yourselves and become judges with evil designs?

In all fairness, a woman who comes to Mass to be an EMHC with tight-fitting clothes and no bra can probably afford looser-fitting clothes and a bra.

 

[I_Thirst]

In all fairness, a woman who comes to Mass to be an EMHC with tight-fitting clothes and no bra can probably afford loser-fitting clothes and a bra.

The ability to afford something is probably a better standard for membership at a country club rather than attendance or participation/service at any level at Mass.

If the priest didn’t remove her due to her wearing so-and-so attire, perhaps he should check with each parishoner in attendance to discover what is acceptable. Perhaps we should petition the Vatican to add a velvet rope and a clothes bouncer at all Catholic Churches in order to keep out the undesirables.

Or we could focus on loving one’s neighbor, even if one’s neighbor is not wearing a bra while at Mass.

 

[Stylites]

The ability to afford something is probably a better standard for membership at a country club rather than attendance or participation/service at any level at Mass.

If the priest didn’t remove her due to her wearing so-and-so attire, perhaps he should check with each parishoner in attendance to discover what is acceptable. Perhaps we should petition the Vatican to add a velvet rope and a clothes bouncer at all Catholic Churches in order to keep out the undesirables.

Or we could focus on loving one’s neighbor, even if one’s neighbor is not wearing a bra while at Mass.

Dressing modestly has nothing to do with poverty. Bras cost a few dollars, a lot less than the designer skimpy clothes she might otherwise be wearing. Women who dress provocatively and lead others into temptation are not loving their neighbors, they are revelling in the power they can wield over men. Again, there is a disconnect between reciting the Lord’s Prayer wanting us to not be led into temptation, and going ahead and leading others into temptation by our immodest attire.

Certainly Lady Godiva could be an EMHC, and all the saints at Mass wouldn’t be distracted by her holding the Eucharist up between her mammary glands.

 

[buffalo]

I agree. In fact, our parish bulletin today said the same thing . “We all know the summer months have arrived and it’s getting hot. But please remember to dress appropriately for mass”.

Shorts wearers think they are dressing appropriately.

Perhaps a dress code like some establishments have is needed.

 

[mini_me640]

In our external-appearance obsessed world, I would hope if there was one place that a person could go and NOT be judged by how they look, it would be Mass. As long as what someone is wearing is not immodest, I could care less whether they have on shorts or jeans or a suit or whatever. I’m pretty sure Jesus could care less, too, if someone’s heart is where it should be. If your focus is on Him, it shouldn’t be on someone else’s clothing of all things.

 

[TrueLight]

If the priest didn’t remove her due to her wearing so-and-so attire, perhaps he should check with each parishoner in attendance to discover what is acceptable. Perhaps we should petition the Vatican to add a velvet rope and a clothes bouncer at all Catholic Churches in order to keep out the undesirables.

Or we could focus on loving one’s neighbor, even if one’s neighbor is not wearing a bra while at Mass.

I posted these links in another thread.

Wear Proper Clothes to Mass

Modesty at wedding

What is modest for mass should be common sense, but since everyone has different opinions, maybe we do need guidelines.

I have heard of some traditional parishes having spare shawls and such for such occasions. Some really don’t see anything wrong, while some are just defiant.

 

[severus68]

Dressing modestly has nothing to do with poverty. Bras cost a few dollars, a lot less than the designer skimpy clothes she might otherwise be wearing. Women who dress provocatively and lead others into temptation are not loving their neighbors, they are revelling in the power they can wield over men. Again, there is a disconnect between reciting the Lord’s Prayer wanting us to not be led into temptation, and going ahead and leading others into temptation by our immodest attire.

Certainly Lady Godiva could be an EMHC, and all the saints at Mass wouldn’t be distracted by her holding the Eucharist up between her mammary glands.

I prefer not to judge but since you are doing so, may I ask if it is decent to talk about women in this manner and being crude while talking about mass and the Eucharist in virtually the same breathe?

 

[severus68]

The ability to afford something is probably a better standard for membership at a country club rather than attendance or participation/service at any level at Mass.

If the priest didn’t remove her due to her wearing so-and-so attire, perhaps he should check with each parishoner in attendance to discover what is acceptable. Perhaps we should petition the Vatican to add a velvet rope and a clothes bouncer at all Catholic Churches in order to keep out the undesirables.

Or we could focus on loving one’s neighbor, even if one’s neighbor is not wearing a bra while at Mass.

Absolutely and perhaps focus on the Mass.

 

[Stylites]

I prefer not to judge but since you are doing so, may I ask if it is decent to talk about women in this manner and being crude while talking about mass and the Eucharist in virtually the same breathe?

While the thread was originally about wearing shorts, I was responding to post #61 which brought up an EMHC wearing immodest clothes, and recalled a recent EWTN homily by a priest regarding modest dress.

 

[Lormar]

I was quite shocked to see some people show up for Saturday evening Mass in shorts. I know it was very hot outside where I live, but I would have thought people would have shown a bit of respect regardless if they were regulars or visitors.

There is no, absolutely no, excuse for women (or men) wearing shorts at Holy Mass. Not only is it disrespectful, it is an occasion of sin to others. Regardless of what people think nowadays, they do not have the “right” to wear what they want where they want.

We need to bring back some semblance of dignity. We hear so much of that word today, but truly, I’ve never encountered less of it in people.

 

[Lormar]

I guess I am from the old school, while just being Catholic for 22 months. My wife will only wear a dress or skirt and blouse to mass… I will only wear a suit or coat & tie with appropriate trousers. >> I never say anything to those around me in shorts, soccer uniforms… Or young girls in ultra mini skirts and spaghetti strap tops… But, I pray for them.

I often ask myself… “If these same folks who wear shorts to mass were invited to the White House for dinner, would they wear shorts?” How is it that they are invited each Sunday to share in the Body and Blood of the King of Heaven and Earth and will not wear their best.

I have hear arguments that God accepts us just the way we are… True, but He doesn’t want us to stay the way we are, He wants us to change.

I have hear it said that “As long and I attend mass, it doesn’t matter what I wear.” I question that statement… Where is the heart of the person making that claim.

If you are poor and can’t afford a suit or a dress, then find the best you have in your closet and wear it to mass…

It’s like the widow’s mite… That’s all she had and she gave it… If all you have are a pair of shorts, then by all means wear them… But, I have seen folks making over $100,000 a year come to mass dressed like they were attending a beach party.