This site ‘
CatholicModesty’ has some good quotes. Colleen Hammond’s book ‘Dressing with Dignity’ has some too.
Modesty is one of those battleground areas where we’ve lost most of the field right now and there isn’t much fight left save with those who know what the fight is about.
So high and low, just like we find priests who say, “Scapular what?” the ground has almost all been taken. So… we hold what we have and take it back as God wills.
This is what I will say, based on the official explicit and implicit standards and what I take them to mean and result in.
Men should wear pants, not jeans, not shorts, to mass. Men in general (not just to mass) should wear pants, because if you set a more formal standard, there is greater respect generally.
Never sneakers or sandles (yes you shore people, no sandles).
Men should not wear t-shirts, and absolutely not wear anything with slogans or pictures or brand advertisements to mass. They should wear collared shirts. They are at their best in full suits, black.
Women should wear skirts that are ankle length. At a minimum if not, they should be eight inches, enough below the knee so that sitting and moving around there is nothing revealed and room to spare for that. If they are in a situation where there will be some danger, wear something under the skirt too.
No pants instead of a skirt. Ever. No jeans, ever.
The best skirt is something not too eye catching, a basic solid color or close to it is fine too. The blouse should be more formal than not, and not cling, especially to the bosom, it should hang loosely off. The sleeves should be half to full length, and not quarter length if it can be at all helped, because too much bare arm is in fact somewhat less modest. Quarter length is always the last choice, as an exception.
One main reason spaghetti straps are not allowed, besides all they show, is that when leaning and moving around, they can reveal too much even more. So no bare backs, stomachs, spaghetti straps, clingy clothing.
This minimum dress standard should not be much deviated from even outside of mass, save perhaps more color and patterns allowed. This is not more modesty, but it is allowed to attract through natural beauty as long as it is not carnal, and it is acknowledged that this is to a degree superficial and not what anyone should be primarily focusing on in such matters.
In other words, modesty is working within these realms. Ribbons, frills are fine for the dresses as long as not very much, in other words, modest, etc.
Nothing see through, so that you can see the underwear or person underneath because the fabric is so thin. This is obvious. If it is not yet, make it so.
For men, very much jewelery is always bad, cut this out, it is not allowed save for royalty and bishops. We’re at our most modest without jewelery, women too, if you must wear something wear only one thing, not more, and hopefully it is religious and attracts more attention to God than you and it.
Men should avoid overly feminine clothing, and women overly masculine clothing this too, is obvious though not for some, make it so and pray, God wills it.
