Should I announce my pregnancy if I'm only engaged, not married?

[mommytobe]

I got engaged around the same time that I found out I was pregnant. I announced the engagement and now my family is saying that my engagement was a lie to cover up my pregnancy. My fiancé was trying to do the right thing and show that he was committed to me and the baby. He is converting to catholicism this year so we can raise our child and future children catholic. We also want to be married to each other. I’m unsure on how to go about the pregnancy news though…My father said that I shouldn’t because my family is going to stop talking to me and not everyone feels the same about me as he does ("He has to love me, I’m his daughter) so I’m really unsure the best way to go about this. Any help is welcome!

 

[TechieGuy]

Plenty of brides have walked down the aisle in wedding dresses that were round around the middle, if you know what I mean.

You aren’t the first, and you won’t be the last.

Having a baby is a blessed event, especially since your fiancee is doing the responsible thing and doing right by you and his child.

Just announce the happy news and if some people ‘tut-tut’ now, then pretty soon they’ll be wagging their fingers at someone else, so don’t worry about them.

 

[TheLittleLady]

Know that the Church advises couples to delay marriage until after the birth of a child. This is a way to eliminate feeling “pressured to get married” by pregnancy.

Those who love you will love you even if you made a mistake
Congrats!!

 

[mommytobe]

Thank you! The thing is I won’t be able to get married before the baby is
born. My fiancé won’t be catholic yet.

 

[MaryT777]

I completely agree with this post. As the old adage goes " If they are talking about me, they are leaving someone else alone…for now." Congratulations and I think it’s wonderful that you choose life for your child.~

 

[TheLittleLady]

Catholics may get permission to marry a non-Catholic. Happens every day!

 

[1ke]

I got engaged around the same time that I found out I was pregnant. I announced the engagement and now my family is saying that my engagement was a lie to cover up my pregnancy

There comes a time when you have to go your own way and ignore what family and friends say. The time has arrived for you. Ignore rude people. Don’t try to combat them, just ignore them. You and your fiancé have bigger fish to fry now.

I’m unsure on how to go about the pregnancy news though…

I would suggest you simply let the news break itself as you begin to show. Or, tell a few friends that you can count on to be supportive and ask them to tell others.

My father said that I shouldn’t because my family is going to stop talking to me and not everyone feels the same about me as he does

A) he doesn’t know this for a fact
B) if they stop talking to you, it’s their loss
C) you have to be prepared to be ok with that

He has to love me, I’m his daughter) so I’m really unsure the best way to go about this. Any help is welcome!

Your father sounds like a real jerk.

Any help is welcome!

Talk to your fiancé and your pastor, and just be prepared that it might be the two of you without the support of your family. It’s unfortunate, but if you are prepared for that it will be less of a let down.

 

[Joe_5859]

I would definitely encourage you to talk to your priest about this as soon as possible if you have not already done so.

There is no singular “correct” way to announce the upcoming birth of a baby. You simply have to weigh the pros and cons with your fiancé as far as which approach may yield which particular consequences. You cannot control the reactions of other people.

My wife and I were married when we had our children, but we still just just told our parents and my siblings over the phone (because of distance) and a couple close friends in person. Everyone else just sort of found out eventually through the grapevine or casual conversation. We didn’t print postcards or make any sort of formal announcement.

God bless you on your upcoming baby and marriage!

 

[Allegra]

I mean, you might as well announce it because it’s not like you can keep it a secret.

 

[cradlecatholic56]

Rejoice! A baby is a blessing! Thank you for choosing life! Best wishes to you and your fiancé.

 

[jacquie99]

Celebrate every life- even the unexpected ones. I was devestated when I found out I was pregnant and unmarried. It was so difficult to hold my head up. I always loved my baby, but I knew the circumstances were not what God intended. It was hard, but that little boy is about to turn 14 next month. His father and I have been married for 10 years and have had 6 more children together! God can make wonderful things happen, even in difficult circumstances. Praying for you!