Should I be confirmed first or have my marriage blessed first?

[Louis1]

I was baptized and received first communion as a Catholic but I was never confirmed. I was married in the Catholic Church in 2001 and then divorced but only recently received an annulment. I was remarried outside of the Catholic Church to my wife who was protestant before I received the annulment for my previous marriage. I would like to be confirmed, receive Holy Eucharist and have my current marriage blessed and recognized by the Catholic Church. What steps do I need to take to proceed? Three years ago my wife went through RCIA and was confirmed after receiving her annulment, we are not sure if this was correct and valid? She has not been receiving the Holy Eucharist for this reason since we are unsure.

Should I be confirmed first which would require confession and Holy Communion? Can I go to confession and receive the Eucharist if my marriage has not yet been blessed?

Should I have my marriage blessed first or does this require me to be confirmed first?

 

[SuscipeMeDomine]

All of these are questions to talk with your pastor about.

My understanding of things is this:

I would like to be confirmed, receive Holy Eucharist and have my current marriage blessed and recognized by the Catholic Church. What steps do I need to take to proceed?

Talk with your pastor. Does your parish or diocese offer adult confirmation classes? If so, you’ll want to sign up.

While it’s not ideal, many parishes combine those needing confirmation into RCIA. If that’s what your parish does you’ll want to find out the details of starting RCIA.

Three years ago my wife went through RCIA and was confirmed after receiving her annulment, we are not sure if this was correct and valid? She has not been receiving the Holy Eucharist for this reason since we are unsure.

Your convalidation should have taken place before her reception into the Church. Sometimes RCIA teams are not on top of marriage issues and miss things like this.

Should I be confirmed first which would require confession and Holy Communion? Can I go to confession and receive the Eucharist if my marriage has not yet been blessed?

As far as I know the order would be confession → convalidation → confirmation, but check with your pastor. He would also be the one to talk with about confession and Eucharist prior to convalidation.

Best wishes to you. There are a number of steps, but focus on one at a time and you’ll get through them all.

 

[esieffe]

Both are usually, but not always, done at the same time, typically while you are attending RCIA classes I am not an apologetic or a priest, but if your marriage is not convalidated by the Church, then you are asked to remain chaste after confirmation until it is. [depending on the church you were married in.]

 

[Annabelle_Marie]

Get your marriage blessed. That would be first along with confession. They should go hand and hand. Once you have done so you can receive the Eucharist and so can your wife.

Then you can get confirmed later and I highly recommend it. Take it from someone who has been there!

I was baptized and had first communion but no confirmation. I didn’t have any annulments to worry about but I did go to confession and got my marriage confirmed. Later on I went through classes with my husband (RCIA) and received confirmation but I was able to receive the Eucharist and go to confession the entire time after my marriage blessing.

 

[Louis1]

Thank you for the replies. I’m still a little confused. It sounds like the key factor is to remain chaste. If that happens then I can have a “good” confession, have my marriage convalidated (receive the Eucharist) and go through confirmation (receive the Eucharist). Other than going to confession first does the order matter, marriage convalidation or confirmation? I guess I answered my own question above but would still like some feedback, marriage convalidation first after confession to be able to start living as a married couple and then move on to confirmation?

 

[Annabelle_Marie]

Thank you for the replies. I’m still a little confused. It sounds like the key factor is to remain chaste. If that happens then I can have a “good” confession, have my marriage convalidated (receive the Eucharist) and go through confirmation (receive the Eucharist). Other than going to confession first does the order matter, marriage convalidation or confirmation? I guess I answered my own question above but would still like some feedback, marriage convalidation first after confession to be able to start living as a married couple and then move on to confirmation?

Marriage convalidation and THEN confirmation

You can receive the Eucharist without confirmation but you can not receive the Eucharist without the marriage convalidation unless you remain chaste.

 

[Brigid34]

When I entered the Church as a candidate I had to get an annulment before it. Then the priest told me I could enter the Church (living as brother and sister), then have our marriage convalidated (blessed).

 

[Vico]

I was baptized and received first communion as a Catholic but I was never confirmed. I was married in the Catholic Church in 2001 and then divorced but only recently received an annulment. I was remarried outside of the Catholic Church to my wife who was protestant before I received the annulment for my previous marriage. I would like to be confirmed, receive Holy Eucharist and have my current marriage blessed and recognized by the Catholic Church. What steps do I need to take to proceed? Three years ago my wife went through RCIA and was confirmed after receiving her annulment, we are not sure if this was correct and valid? She has not been receiving the Holy Eucharist for this reason since we are unsure.

Should I be confirmed first which would require confession and Holy Communion? Can I go to confession and receive the Eucharist if my marriage has not yet been blessed?

Should I have my marriage blessed first or does this require me to be confirmed first?

Since you are a Catholic that did not marry with approval of the Catholic Church, you are not currently married and so are not able to receive the Eucharist. If you receive Confirmation it will be valid, but the grace will not be received in your current situation. The norm is to be Confirmed before marriage, if it can be done without grave inconvenience, although convalidation is normally done first.

Sacred Heat of Houston has this:Please note: Individuals must be in a proper state of grace before they can receive the sacrament of Confirmation, which means if married, must be in a marriage formally recognized by the Catholic Church. For example: A Catholic married by a Justice of the Peace or other non-Catholic officiator without a formal dispensation from the Church is outside the state of grace, according to the Church’s theology on the sacraments.
sacredhearthouston.org/index.cfm?load=page&page=326

 

[Louis1]

I decided to read what the Catechism had to say about Confirmation. I found this interesting in 1310, “To receive Confirmation one must be in a state of grace. One should receive the sacrament of Penance in order to be cleansed for the gift of the Holy Spirit…”.

I guess that’s a clear answer as far as Confirmation goes. Makes sense to be cleansed before receiving the Holy Spirit similar to being cleansed before receiving the body of Christ.

Based on the all the information I received from everyone here on the forum and in my own research I decided to “skip” being confirmed yesterday evening at the Easter Vigil. I’ll start working on getting everything else in order before being confirmed hopefully in the next couple of months.