Should I be confirmed or not?

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TBolt1000T

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I’m pretty sure that the answer is no, considering my situation, but I want to make sure. I’ve tried really hard to live like a Catholic through most of the RCIA process, but I still have serious doubts about the truth of some Church teachings, like holy days of obligation, mandatory abstanence from meat on Fridays during Lent, and some other things. I’ve been told by several Catholics, including the RCIA coordinator at my parish, that I must publicly profess that I believe every single thing that the Catholic Church teaches in order to receive Confirmation and Eucharist. I don’t feel that I can do this without lying. My RCIA director and someone else even told me that I would be lying to God if I received Eucharist in a Catholic Church and didn’t believe every single thing that the Catholic Church teaches. So, I guess I’m just another confused Protestant again, only now, I have a bunch of Catholic beliefs I don’t know what to do with. Maybe I should try the Episcopal Church or something else that is more in line with what I believe? This breaks my heart.
 
there is a huge difference between not accepting the ‘discipline’ of abstaining from meat and not believing in say, the Real Presence or the Immaculate Conception, which are both doctrines of the Church, which must be accepted.

If you don’t accept disciplinary teachings, you can receive Confirmation in good faith without any harm to your soul.
 
stuart12 said:
there is a huge difference between not accepting the ‘discipline’ of abstaining from meat and not believing in say, the Real Presence or the Immaculate Conception, which are both doctrines of the Church, which must be accepted.

If you don’t accept disciplinary teachings, you can receive Confirmation in good faith without any harm to your soul.
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The problem with that, is that I was told by my RCIA director that it’s a MORTAL SIN to not abstain from meat on Fridays during Lent, and I know for a fact that the Church teaches that it’s a mortal sin not to attend Mass on a holy day of obligation. If I don’t obey these teachings, the Church says that I’m in mortal sin, therefore not able to receive the sacraments.
 
stuart12 said:
there is a huge difference between not accepting the ‘discipline’ of abstaining from meat and not believing in say, the Real Presence or the Immaculate Conception, which are both doctrines of the Church, which must be accepted.

If you don’t accept disciplinary teachings, you can receive Confirmation in good faith without any harm to your soul.
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I am not so sure this is true. Not accepting a disciplinary teaching is being disobedient to the authority of the Church. To knowingly violate a discipline could be a grave situation and be considered a mortal sin.

We are called to follow all the disciplines that the Church lays out. Yes we can disagree but we must follow them. If you can not follow them then I would not be confirmed.

Have you spoken of this to your pastor?
 
you must abstain from meat on fridays as the Church teaches. but you don’t need to believe that it is necessary with divine faith. its not an instrinsic part of Catholic doctrine, it can be changed as any time.

not everyone believes that in the Latin Church, priests should be celebate, as this is only a discipline.

whats wrong with abstaining from meat that troubles you?
 
ByzCath said:
I am not so sure this is true. Not accepting a disciplinary teaching is being disobedient to the authority of the Church. To knowingly violate a discipline could be a grave situation and be considered a mortal sin.

We are called to follow all the disciplines that the Church lays out. Yes we can disagree but we must follow them. If you can not follow them then I would not be confirmed.

Have you spoken of this to your pastor?
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yes i know we must follow then, see my post i added while you wrote this.
 
Have you had a talk with Father at all to help you with some of this?
You could always just put it off until you are sure in your heart but from what some others have said, when it comes to dicipline, those can change, but Dogma, doctine can’t and doesn’t. I believe Father could Confirm you later if you wanted to wait until all your doubts are cleared up.

God bless you, don’t give up and I will keep you in my prayers.

So what is it about abstaining and not going to Mass on Holy Days of obligation that bothers you?
 
Do you believe in the holy, catholic, apostolic Church that Christ founded?

That is a critical Catholic belief. If you do not believe that, then you cannot be Catholic. If you do believe it, then you owe God and His Church your obedience, even if there are small things that you do not understand.

“Blessed are those who have not seen and yet believe.” John 20:29
 
stuart12 said:
you must abstain from meat on fridays as the Church teaches. but you don’t need to believe that it is necessary with divine faith. its not an instrinsic part of Catholic doctrine, it can be changed as any time.

not everyone believes that in the Latin Church, priests should be celebate, as this is only a discipline.

whats wrong with abstaining from meat that troubles you?
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I have no problem with the act of abstaining from meat itself. Where my problem is, is that the Church forces me to do it on pain of mortal sin. This blatantly contradicts 1 Tim 4:1-5, and I have yet to receive a satisfactory answer from any Catholic on this matter. However, the question is not about the contradiction to Scripture, but it is whether I should go through with Confirmation or not.
 
it does not contradict what the Apostle wrote. Saint Paul is condeming those who teach that eating certain foods is evil, not condemning us for abstaining from meat on certain days.

There’s nothing wrote with meat, its not evil, but good. we just chose to abstain as a penance so we can remember our Lord who gave His flesh up for the world.
 
stuart12 said:
it does not contradict what the Apostle wrote. Saint Paul is condeming those who teach that eating certain foods is evil, not condemning us for abstaining from meat on certain days.

There’s nothing wrote with meat, its not evil, but good. we just chose to abstain as a penance so we can remember our Lord who gave His flesh up for the world.
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Tell me then, how do you explain Romans 14:5-10 on holy days of obligation and abstanence? Sounds like St. Paul is forbidding the Church to impose holy days of obligation and abstanence on the faithful. The Church is judging us as condemned to Hell unless we go to Confession if we disobey one of these teachings, which is clearly prohibited in Romans 14:5-10.
 
TBolt1000T said:
I’m pretty sure that the answer is no, considering my situation, but I want to make sure. I’ve tried really hard to live like a Catholic through most of the RCIA process, but I still have serious doubts about the truth of some Church teachings, like holy days of obligation, mandatory abstanence from meat on Fridays during Lent, and some other things. I’ve been told by several Catholics, including the RCIA coordinator at my parish, that I must publicly profess that I believe every single thing that the Catholic Church teaches in order to receive Confirmation and Eucharist. I don’t feel that I can do this without lying. My RCIA director and someone else even told me that I would be lying to God if I received Eucharist in a Catholic Church and didn’t believe every single thing that the Catholic Church teaches. So, I guess I’m just another confused Protestant again, only now, I have a bunch of Catholic beliefs I don’t know what to do with. Maybe I should try the Episcopal Church or something else that is more in line with what I believe? This breaks my heart.
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If you are not prepared to accept all the teachings of the Catholic Church, including her disciplinary teachings, perhaps you are not really ready to convert yet. Maybe you need more time to really study and work out the things that are troubling you. It is more important to your salvation to be able to give full assent to the totality of the Catholic faith at the time of your reception into the Church than to think that somewhere down the road you might have an “eureka” moment and everything will just fall into place. You must be honest with yourself because, afterall, you can’t fool God. If you honestly believe that you are not ready, do not look on it as some kind of a personal failure. You already have many Catholic beliefs that you can use, with the grace of God, as building blocks to bring you to that fullness of faith.
I can only imagine how, having come this far, the heartbreak you are feeling. One of my brothers’-in-law had the same experience many years ago. The week before he was to be welcomed into the Church, he confessed that he just could not bring himself to fully accept all her teachings; in particular the Marian dogmas. He truly agonized over what he felt was a lack in himself and also, to a lesser degree, the disappointment of his family if he didn’t convert. However, he didn’t give up. It took another seven years until he was finally able to truthfully say that he did indeed accept fully all the beliefs of the Catholic Church. It was a wonderfully liberating moment for him when he received the Eucharist for the first time and was confirmed as a Catholic because he knew that he had no doubts whatsoever.
Hang on to the Catholic beliefs that you do have and keep living as a Catholic, even if you don’t feel ready as yet. It won’t do you any harm. I most surely do not want to discourage anyone from converting to Catholicism but you must do it with an open heart and be able to say with complete conviction the Act of Faith:
“O my God, I firmly believe all Thou hast revealed, and all that the Catholic Church teaches, because Thou hast revealed it”.
Speak to your pastor. Tell him that you do have some serious doubts. Follow whatever advice he gives you. Do not rely on the advice you get on an internet forum. This is the most important decision you will ever make in your life.
 
TBolt1000T said:
Tell me then, how do you explain Romans 14:5-10 on holy days of obligation and abstanence? Sounds like St. Paul is forbidding the Church to impose holy days of obligation and abstanence on the faithful. The Church is judging us as condemned to Hell unless we go to Confession if we disobey one of these teachings, which is clearly prohibited in Romans 14:5-10.
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‘‘He who eats meat, eats to the Lord, for he gives thanks to God; and he who abstains, does so to the Lord and gives thanks to God.’’

We abstain for God. No contradiction here.

Remember, if we disobey the teachings of the Church, we are rejecting Christ Who founded the Church. The Church gets Her authority to bind and loose from Christ.

And in order to commit a mortal sin, one must do it with full knowledge and full consent. No other person can tel if those were present in the person who failed to abstain.
 
TBolt1000T said:
Tell me then, how do you explain Romans 14:5-10 on holy days of obligation and abstanence? Sounds like St. Paul is forbidding the Church to impose holy days of obligation and abstanence on the faithful. The Church is judging us as condemned to Hell unless we go to Confession if we disobey one of these teachings, which is clearly prohibited in Romans 14:5-10.
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Actually, if you were to read Romans in complete isolation apart from the rest of the New Testament, you could very well have a point. However, that is not how the Church reads it. Protestants read it in isolation without going deeper into what St. Paul actually says.

If you were to read the entire gamut of Pauline writings, then you would realize that St. Paul does not contradict what the Church teaches at all. The law he talks about is the former cultic practice of Ancient Israel, especially where circumsicion was involved. These cultic practices were to prepare Ancient Israel for holiness and to prepare Ancient Israel to receive Jesus Christ, the promised Messiah.

When Jesus finally came, his own people accepted him not (although, granted, there were quite a few Jews who became Christian). Through the Last Supper, Jesus instituted a new Covenant for the New Israel, the Church. And Church, in this respect, means the Catholic Church. She is His Body and He is the Head of that Body. Yes, Jesus incorporated many of the forms of the cultic worship of Ancient Israel, mainly the sacrificial component. He did not abrogate the 10 commandments. The third commandment, on which the Church bases Sundays and Holy Days of Obligation, sitll stands. In fact, St. Paul was not talking about the Mosaic law, he was talking about the 600+ little laws.

That is why you cannot read Romans in a vaccuum. To do so means that we have missed the point of all of the Pauline writings.
 
stuart12 said:
‘‘He who eats meat, eats to the Lord, for he gives thanks to God; and he who abstains, does so to the Lord and gives thanks to God.’’

We abstain for God. No contradiction here.

Remember, if we disobey the teachings of the Church, we are rejecting Christ Who founded the Church. The Church gets Her authority to bind and loose from Christ.

And in order to commit a mortal sin, one must do it with full knowledge and full consent. No other person can tel if those were present in the person who failed to abstain.
Click to expand...
You still didn’t answer my question fully. How does Romans 14:5-10 not forbid holy days of obligation, and judging the faithful if we don’t abstain from meat on certain days?
 
‘‘He who regards one day as special, does so to the Lord’’

that does not contradict the teaching of the Church. We set aside certain days to remember the things our Lord did, His saints did or some other mystery.

If you can not accept the Church teaching as coming from the authority of Christ, you really should put off Confirmation.
 
If someone believes every single thing the Church teaches but does not accept the authority of the Church, then they should not participate in any of our sacraments. It seems you have a lot of soul-searching left to do, and ought not be confirmed at this time.
 
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