Should i forgive

  • Thread starter Thread starter lordie
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lordie

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I know forgiveness is good
and i forgave many of my abusers
but my old sis i tried to forgive.
one day i even said i forgive her
to her . then she started acting well strange
and doing things behind my back
even almost had me put away
and then she tried kidnapping me .twice
she got some one rape me and. Tape it so she would
have proof .i was active (sexaully) then she got the rapist to
drug me .
so my question is should i forgive her
and if i do don’t tell her
or just do it for myself
thanks
 
Forgiving someone does not mean allowing them to hurt you again. Do your best to get away from this person. As far away as you possibly can. Call the police.

Now, as to the forgiving. When you forgive someone you free yourself from the hold they have on your mind and on your heart. The anger and hatred you feel becomes a burden. This is not an easy path but even the desire to forgive can give you peace.

There is an old saying that I have found to be true.

“Holding on to anger and resentment is like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die.”

Forgiveness is the medicine for your soul.

For the time being do this for yourself. Right now she probably doesn’t want your forgiveness. It sounds as if she wants your fear and anger. In the future she may be able to comprehend that she needs forgiveness.
 
You should forgive, but you do not have to forget.

Also, just because you forgive doesn’t mean that a person has be let back into your life.

God Bless and I so sorry for your pain. I will pray for you
 
lordie,

What you described needs to be reported. Get help as soon as you can.

Prayers for you!
 
I am adding a post on the subject of forgiveness, but it may or may not have any practical application to the situation in this thread.

We know that Jesus says in the gospel that we are supposed to forgive seven times seventy, which means forgiving without counting.

Seven times seventy is four hundred ninety.

One common way to think about this is that somebody does something to you four hundred and ninety times, and you forgive them each time.

Another situation is when somebody does something to you ONCE, and as the days and weeks go by, when you can’t forget what they did, you have to forgive them “seven times seventy” because it is hard to let go of the pain and the insult of even one bad act.

It’s hard to forgive somebody for doing 490 things to you, but it’s also hard to forgive them for even one thing that they do to you.

My sister is mad at me and has divorced herself from her own family so I don’t even know what to ask her forgiveness for. Every day that she wakes up she has to get mad at me all over again to keep her hatred alive. I have to tiptoe around her, so as not to run into her. That, by the way, makes me seem like the bad guy, when in fact, I’m just trying to avoid her like I would a snake.
 
You have the obligation to protect yourself. Your sister has committed a number of criminal acts. She should be prosecuted to the fullest extend of the law.

Then, you can work on forgiving her. But never again put yourself in a place where she can hurt you.
 
HelenRose said:
Forgiving someone does not mean allowing them to hurt you again. QUOTE]

I disagree with much of this statement. Of course we are not supposed to let people drug and rape us; of course we should set boundaries and separate ourselves from certain persons until they repent and accept the God-given boundaries. However, if we do not accept them back into our good graces (to a position where they could hurt us again) than we have not actually forgiven them.

Look at it this way; if God did not let us back into His presence after we sin - putting us back into a position where we can best hurt the Immaculate Heart of Jesus - than we would not be receiving forgiveness but wrath.

God lets us back into full communion with Him after we repent of our sins, no matter how much we sin. Anything less than this is not true forgiveness.

Hope this helps,
  • Gideon
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Lordie, you should report what you claim happened to you to the police.

You describe yourself as a female minister; what do you mean?
 
Gideon1473 said:
HelenRose;12051294:
Forgiving someone does not mean allowing them to hurt you again. QUOTE]

I disagree with much of this statement. Of course we are not supposed to let people drug and rape us; of course we should set boundaries and separate ourselves from certain persons until they repent and accept the God-given boundaries. However, if we do not accept them back into our good graces (to a position where they could hurt us again) than we have not actually forgiven them.

Look at it this way; if God did not let us back into His presence after we sin - putting us back into a position where we can best hurt the Immaculate Heart of Jesus - than we would not be receiving forgiveness but wrath.

God lets us back into full communion with Him after we repent of our sins, no matter how much we sin. Anything less than this is not true forgiveness.

Hope this helps,
  • Gideon
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I am thinking in terms of co-dependency. As an example: a man continues to beat and torture a woman. She may come to a place where she can forgive him but it would not be good for her or for the man for her to place herself back in that same situation. There are other examples but I think you get the idea. Enabling a person to continue to harm you and your family is not “forgiveness” it is a sickness.
Click to expand...
 
always for give those that do harm to you for Our Lord Said, foreget very one, even your ememies.
 
Protect yourself from your Sister, but do forgive everybody in your life, including her. God bless you.
 
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