Should I go?

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Uknowhoo

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I’m in a situation here:
Apparently this Sunday there’s a Jehovah’s Witness meeting which is supposed to be pretty big actually. Since my boyfriend’s family are JWs, they invited me. Normally I would say “Thanks, but no thanks”. But you see, it was my boyfriend’s father who invited me. He’s had a difficult life (depression, alcoholism) and feels neglected by my boyfriend and me. He told me he understands that I’m Catholic but it would mean a lot to him if we came. I talked to my boyfriend about it. Since he no longer affiliates himself with that religion, he told me he doesn’t want to go either. But he’s having a hard time telling his family that he’s been coming to church with me (for more than a year now!) I told him now would be the perfect time to tell them-- but I really don’t think he will; he might just end up going. So now it’s up to me: should I go? I really don’t want to sit there for 7 hours (will be from morning till evening) listening to a bunch of made-up, anti-Catholic doctrine. But I don’t want to upset my boyfriend’s father- who’s always been so nice to me.

If I do decide to go though, I will most definitely NOT miss mass for this! I have a shirt that says “proud to be Catholic” that I jokingly said I was going to wear- but of course, I am not :rolleyes:

Any advice? suggestions?
Thanks & God bless you 🙂
 
Make the fellow feel good. Go to the meeting. It won’t hurt you in the least, and it may become a serious emotional capital investment for later on.

Matthew
 
Uknowhoo said:
I’m in a situation here:
Apparently this Sunday there’s a Jehovah’s Witness meeting which is supposed to be pretty big actually. Since my boyfriend’s family are JWs, they invited me. Normally I would say “Thanks, but no thanks”. But you see, it was my boyfriend’s father who invited me. He’s had a difficult life (depression, alcoholism) and feels neglected by my boyfriend and me. He told me he understands that I’m Catholic but it would mean a lot to him if we came. I talked to my boyfriend about it. Since he no longer affiliates himself with that religion, he told me he doesn’t want to go either. But he’s having a hard time telling his family that he’s been coming to church with me (for more than a year now!) I told him now would be the perfect time to tell them-- but I really don’t think he will; he might just end up going. So now it’s up to me: should I go? I really don’t want to sit there for 7 hours (will be from morning till evening) listening to a bunch of made-up, anti-Catholic doctrine. But I don’t want to upset my boyfriend’s father- who’s always been so nice to me.

If I do decide to go though, I will most definitely NOT miss mass for this! I have a shirt that says “proud to be Catholic” that I jokingly said I was going to wear- but of course, I am not :rolleyes:

Any advice? suggestions?
Thanks & God bless you 🙂
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I smell a rat.

Being put on a guilt trip is no reason to go. If you must go, get an agreement from him to attend Easter vigil with you.

Yea, right.
 
If it was one time, for an hour or two, I might say go ahead. But 7 hours of JW rants? I don’t think it’s a good idea.

Can’t your BF and you take him out to dinner or something?
 
OutinChgoburbs said:
If it was one time, for an hour or two, I might say go ahead. But 7 hours of JW rants? I don’t think it’s a good idea.

Can’t your BF and you take him out to dinner or something?
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No- I know it means a lot to him. He’s always trying to drag my boyfriend along to one of the meetings, but my bf goes to mass with me. Of course, he doesn’t know this.
 
I would say just go for an hour or so.

Seven hours of JW teaching:bigyikes:…wouldn’t you end up resenting your BF’s father afterwards if you spend seven hours in a JW meeting. Sheesh, that would drive me crazy.:banghead:

Nobody can treat me so nice that I would agree to spend seven hours in their church. Did he re-define the very definition of nice??? Did he risk his life saving you from a shark attack, donate his blood for your liver operation, and make you blueberry pancakes on your wedding day? Seven hours would be TORTURE.😃
 
What purpose is there to going? If it is just for companionship them tell him you’ll spend the day going somewhere. If it is so you can go to church and believe what he does then this might be problematic.
 
We have a long time member here, yessian. I would suggest you do a search for her posts, maybe give her a PM. She has walked in your shoes and can give you first hand advice.
 
kage_ar said:
We have a long time member here, yessian. I would suggest you do a search for her posts, maybe give her a PM. She has walked in your shoes and can give you first hand advice.
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Excellent suggestion!👍
 
Thanks for your responses everyone.

I decided not to go. Just felt it was the right thing to do.
Thanks again.
 
I had no idea this thread had to do with JWs. If I knew, I would’ve chimed in right away. And because I stay in the Parenting section ever since I lost my baby, I seem to come here very seldom.

I’m so glad you decided not to go. I have been there and it’s not the road I recommend you take. I have had it really hard in my marriage because of religion among other things. yes, it can work, but I don’t recommend it.

I PM’d you 2 really long messages. I hope it helps you somehow. But you know, dealing with a JW is never easy, especially when you are in a relationship w/them.

I remember you posted a long time ago that he’d convert for you… what does he say now? I hope that he finds his way to the Church and now that he is attending w/you that he’ll have a change of heart and convert.

I’m almost always on, so whenever you want to talk, I’m here. I just went back to work last wk after several months of not working so it might take me longer to respond, but I will eventually get to it.
 
Uknowhoo said:
What do you mean?
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He’s had it really hard with the JWs… he means it’d give you a lot of heartache later on if you got more serious and got married and such… he knows from personal experience.
 
Well, as an ex JW, who married a catholic, I would honestly tell you I would never attend one of their assemblies, no matter how important it would be to anyone in my family (some members are still JWs). It is their attempt to “get his foot and yours for that matter in the door” to try and win you back.

It goes without saying that if the roles were reversed, they would NEVER go to a Catholic Mass. My mother did not even attend my wedding because of it being in the Catholic church.

Do not push catholic beliefs on your husband too hard either. He made up his mind and doesn’t wish to continue to be a JW. Let God reel him in. There is a lot of brainwashing from the JW’s that needs to be rinsed out. It will happen, just give it time, and be patient with him.

Glad you stood your ground!
 
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