Should I make a general confession?

[timeandeternity]

A while back, I realized that I made many bad confessions when I was younger, due to an almost total lack of contrition, purpose of amendment, and determination to avoid near occasions of sin. So I confessed having made these bad confessions, and included many of my mortal sins from those confessions. However, I didn’t included all these sins, because I’d already re-confessed many of them in a previous confession (having realized they hadn’t been anywhere near adequately confessed in the first place). Since I didn’t include every sin from my bad confessions, would that later confession have been bad? I also didn’t have all that much time to prepare for this confession, so I’m sure it wasn’t really comprehensive enough.
Also, I’m wondering if I should make a general confession. I’ve talked to a couple priests about it, and they just assumed that these earlier confessions weren’t actually bad, they were just due to my particular stage of spiritual development at the time and my “competence as a penitent.” However, after giving this some serious thought, I’m sure that this was not the case–these confessions *were *bad, since I was pretty much completely apathetic and careless about the state of my soul and my relationship with God at that time. I hardly think that can be excused as incompetency or a particular stage of spiritual growth.
So my question is, should I make a general confession, or have I done enough by confessing these bad confessions? Please, please, *please *don’t just tell me what I want to hear, or give me a “You’re okay, hun; don’t worry, you’re good to go!” type of answer! Thanks

 

[baltobetsy]

I see from your profile that scrupulosity may be a concern for you. If that is the case, making general confessions is not recommended. Trusting your confessor is recommended.

It is natural for you to look back at a previous stage of your spiritual life and be dissatisfied, especially now that you seem to have become much stricter with yourself. That does not mean you acted with bad will at the time. The very fact that you went to confession at all means that you were at least trying. The priest who told you to ascribe your less than perfect confessions to incompetence or stage of development sounds very wise to me.

Part of scrupulosity is always doubting the validity of your confessions. You must act against this tendency. If you make a general confession now, you will be feeding it. In a short while, you will discover some flaw in this general confession and feel the need to make another. And another. Just stop it right now, before the cycle gets started.

It would be very helpful to you to get one confessor who is experienced and confident in dealing with scruples to help you. Only confess to him, and obey him in everything concerning sin and conscience. If the question of a general confession is still on your mind, ask him, trusting that obedience is the surest way of pleasing God.

And isn’t all about loving and pleasing God? He loves you enough to die for you. He’s not trying to trip you up.

Betsy

 

[timeandeternity]

Thanks Betsy; you really put a lot of thought into your answer! I guess my problem is that I’m looking back to just a couple years ago, and I recognize that even though I occasionally went to confession, I didn’t even really try to be sorry for what I had done. I know that you have to at least try to be truly sorry for your sins, and then God will gladly and lovingly forgive you; but if you don’t even put in the effort, than no go…
I think you’re right, though, that I definitely need to find a regular confessor and spiritual director. I have talked several times to one particular priest, but it’s mostly been over the phone; it’s helped some, but I do need a good chunk of time to just sit down and talk. I will definitely follow your advice!

 

[baltobetsy]

Excellent plan! May God bless you as you carry it out.

Betsy