Should I move in with my liberal non-practicing daughter?

[Maybelle]

My husband died a few months ago without insurance. I’ve been a stay at home wife for my entire life and my health isn’t great. I’ve had six children. My house is in dire condition, it is basically crumbling around me. I can’t afford to fix it and can’t even afford my bills. My children have families and commitments, they cant help. Except my youngest daughter. Honestly we’ve never had a good relationship. She and her daddy were very close though. She was my most difficult child, always in trouble. I practically had to drag her to church. She did go on to be very successful financially. She and her husband are very liberal non religious types. They have 2 children and told me I was welcome to move in with them. They have a beautiful home with plenty ofspace. They live in a beautiful but liberal area. I don’t know if I should go or not.

 

[pianistclare]

Only if they will respect your beliefs and not harrass you if you need a ride to Mass.
Sounds like she’s reaching out to repair the relationship. It might turn out great.

 

[SuscipeMeDomine]

My children have families and commitments, they cant help. Except my youngest daughter. Honestly we’ve never had a good relationship. She and her daddy were very close though. She was my most difficult child, always in trouble. I practically had to drag her to church. She did go on to be very successful financially. She and her husband are very liberal non religious types. They have 2 children and told me I was welcome to move in with them. They have a beautiful home with plenty ofspace. They live in a beautiful but liberal area. I don’t know if I should go or not.

So the liberal, non-practicing daughter and her husband are willing to open their home to you while your other five – presumably practicing – children aren’t interested. Sounds like this daughter is the only one who actually got the message!

 

[Lou2U]

I would take the chance to build up a good, strong relationship with her. Now you’re both adults hopefully you will be able to connect with her as you haven’t before.

 

[Maybelle]

They have found a few Catholic churches near by but it’s living in a godless house that concerns me

 

[Lou2U]

It sounds like they’re doing everything they can to accommodate you and your faith. I don’t see a problem as long as they are respectful of you and vice versa.

 

[pensmama87]

So the liberal, non-practicing daughter and her husband are willing to open their home to you while your other five – presumably practicing – children aren’t interested. Sounds like this daughter is the only one who actually got the message!

Well, to be fair, there may be legitimate reasons why they can’t. But I do think it’s a good sign from the daughter! If you need a place to go, then go for it, and the relationship may improve.

If you have other options and you’re concerned it will be very difficult to live with her family, then consider the other options. If you don’t have other options, then try to make the best of it.

ETA: This sounds better and better (that they’ve found nearby parishes.) I would try hard to be gracious in their home. You might be able to plant a seed, or cultivate the one that’s already growing.

 

[angel12]

They have found a few Catholic churches near by but it’s living in a godless house that concerns me

It’s not the same as living there, of course, but my daughter and son-in-law are also liberal and non-practicing. But whenever I stay there, they make sure I can get to Mass, and my beliefs are always respected.

 

[Allegra]

There’s no such place as a “Godless” house. God is there, whether they believe it or not. If you’ve lived long enough to raise six children, I don’t think you have to worry about them tempting you to neglect your faith. Are you afraid that they will have a problem with your praying in having religious items in your room? Why don’t you discuss your specific concerns with your daughter? It may be that they’re non-issues.

 

[TheLittleLady]

Do not let politics, an earthy thing, come between you and your daughter.

 

[QwertyGirl]

Inviting a mother and mother-in-law (to her husband) to move into the family home that is already established with two children is a HUGE gesture of generosity. I will be blunt here… You sound sort of entitled. When she lived in your house as a child, you expected her live your way. Now you may move into her house and you shouldn’t do so unless you are willing to make some concessions and compromises. Asking you to leave your religion at the door would not be acceptable, of course. But this is her house and it should be expected she does things her way. So, for example, if you are used to saying grace before meals, they probably aren’t. It doesn’t mean you can’t say grace. It just means you bow your head and pray a silent grace so you don’t cause discomfort to her and her family.

I think it is a wonderful thing that your daughter invited you. If you are harboring bad feelings about the way she was when she was a kid or young adult, then maybe you could investigate the possibility of letting some of that go.

 

[7_Sorrows]

It sounds like your difficult daughter has matured and is reaching out to you.
What, if any, are your other options?
Her offer, would be a gift from God of I were in your situation.

 

[Katie777]

Of course it’s devastating when a child leaves the faith and I’m so sorry.

You have to ask yourself if you can be a silent Catholic witness to your faith and detach from resentment as there will be reminders of her leaving the faith daily.

 

[1ke]

They have found a few Catholic churches near by

That is so nice of them. Sounds like they want you to come live there, and are actively preparing for you to be able to go to church and do things that you want to do.

but it’s living in a godless house that concerns me

That is a very rude thing to say, and ungrateful. They don’t practice the faith. SO WHAT? You can still practice the faith.

They are offering you a roof over your head, which none of your other kids are doing. If you’d rather be homeless, then by all means keep that pride and superiority you are exuding in place and wear it right to the homeless shelter wrapped around you like a cape. I’m sure it will keep you warm at night.

 

[lilypadrees]

If you can’t afford to stay in your home and your daughter has invited you to move in with them, take her up on it. You can always move into an apartment, condo or assisted living facility if you don’t like staying with them.

 

[Demetra]

I think you should accept the help from your daughter and her husband. As long as they don’t object to you going to church I don’t see a problem. Just realize that they will think differently from you and try to accept them for what they are. Liberals can be very nice people too. Give them a chance. At least this will give you some time to regroup and get back on track. And this may be a pleasant time for you to grow closer to your daughter and create some nice memories. You will be a guest in their home for a while so view this as a gift. Try to be a blessing to them by your words and actions.