Should we let our children believe in Santa?

[Diana_Catherine]

I’m not a parent facing this dilemma, its just something I was thinking off. If I had children, would I encourage them to believe in Santa, or at least passively stand by while they picked up the idea from their friends, tv, media, etc?

On one hand, I don’t like the idea of making up stories like this. Yes its not a big issue, but I would want to be truthful to my children consistently so that they know they can trust me. It also seems to take away the focus from Christ.
Yet on the other hand it seems almost cruel to tell children that Santa doesn’t exist.

The only course of action I can think of is to stand by passively when they are young and hearing about Santa on the tv and what not. However, once they start questioning me and asking whether he exists, they are probably old enough to know the truth.

I know a devout Catholic family who let their son believe in Santa until he was 11. That seems unreasonable to me, but I don’t want to judge their choices…
For parents: How have you personally handled the situation?

I know this isn’t a big issue, but I was just curious. Thanks in advance for the responses!

God Bless

You make some very good points. How can you say you have always been truthful to your child if you taught them a fantasy as they grew up.

We always try our best to be truthful to our children. Santa Claus was always a fun character, stories to be read, movies to watch and fun to be had at our home but IMHO it is best to always be truthful about the real meaning of Christmas. How could you ever go wrong by letting your children know that Jesus is the reason for the Christmas season. If Catholic children were taught to follow the liturgical year Christmas would make sense to them.

With so many broken families and people leaving the Church and God, it is best to bring them truth because that is what sets them free. It has been said that many times when children realize their parents lied about Santa they come to mistrust their parents and they question other things their parents say.

Santa can be fun, and there are a lot of ways to enjoy Santa in Christmas but again IMHO, I would keep him as the fictional character he is. We can certainly allow our kids to have fantasies but it is our job to bring them truth and not encourage the deception.

Also, I think it is great that even though you don’t have children you are questioning and seeking answers, you will be ready when you do have children.

 

[mary_bobo]

My kids never directly asked me if Santa was real. There was no “moment” when they had their fantasies shattered, they just grew up. Seriously. I think the people who want to make this an issue either don’t have children, or got messed up in other ways as children. It’s just not a big deal. You do it until the kids are mature enough to figure it out, and then you develop other traditions.

I like the way you think. Why are we so intent in destroying all the customs that most of us celebrated in our childhoods. Kids are smart enough to figure out all by themselves about Santa without our even telling them. My kids all believed in Santa and they all grew up to be normal, productive human beings who then played Santa for their kids. If they ask about Santa, tell them, but don’t ruin their fantasy. They get to be children for too short a time. Let them enjoy it.

 

[OLofMtCarmel]

Probably not. However, I think it can be used in a positive way when you approach it correctly. Expensive presents should always come form key family members so they don’t develop the entitlement mentality

We do it out of family tradition. Each child learns that dad and mom are Santa, Easter Bunny, Tooth Fairy.

 

[Cristiano]

I like the way you think. Why are we so intent in destroying all the customs that most of us celebrated in our childhoods. Kids are smart enough to figure out all by themselves about Santa without our even telling them. My kids all believed in Santa and they all grew up to be normal, productive human beings who then played Santa for their kids. If they ask about Santa, tell them, but don’t ruin their fantasy. They get to be children for too short a time. Let them enjoy it.

Do you realize that the present form of belief in Santa is only a recent USA based tradition?

 

[Diana_Catherine]

Do you realize that the present form of belief in Santa is only a recent USA based tradition?

Right. 1931. Although prior to that Saint Nicholas was going through many changes. In 1931 Hadden Sundblom created Santa Claus in his own image for Coca Cola. In the mid-1950’s modern Santa Claus is off and running and the truth of the real Saint Nicholas is rarely heard.

Catholics should really know the truth of Saint Nicholas and pass the truth on to their children. In this information age we have great resources.

stnicholascenter.org/pages/timeline-complete/

 

[George_Stegmeir]

Right. 1931. Although prior to that Saint Nicholas was going through many changes. In 1931 Hadden Sundblom created Santa Claus in his own image for Coca Cola. In the mid-1950’s modern Santa Claus is off and running and the truth of the real Saint Nicholas is rarely heard.

Catholics should really know the truth of Saint Nicholas and pass the truth on to their children. In this information age we have great resources.

stnicholascenter.org/pages/timeline-complete/

I’m sorry to have to correct you. The charecture of Santa that we all know and love was first done by Thomas Nast in 1862. All subsequent Santa images are derived from the many Nast cartoons of him.
You can easily check this out by entering Nast Santa Images on any search engine.
Ho Ho Ho!!!

 

[schnipdip]

Looking back to when I was younger, I would have wanted the truth. When I figured out that he wasn’t real it was a large dissappointment and a huge adjustment.

Also, believing in Santa teaches your child to be greedy, to take and not give.

The truth may hurt, but not as much as when they figure out he doesn’t exist.

 

[Skye_Ariel]

http://imgc.allpostersimages.com/im...10/B97ND00Z/posters/danny-hahlbohm-homage.jpg

I go through great lengths to keep up the game before my children make their first communion. I have Google Earth setup with their “Santa Tracker” on the computer. NORAD also has a “monitor” of Santa’s progress on Christmas Eve.

**It’s harmless fun. **My nativity scene is still front and center in the living room. It is the tree that is off to the side.

I agree, and I love that picture!

I let my kids enjoy the magic of Santa. It is a bit different for us. Santa only brings stocking gifts. But they only get one gift each besides that. I didn’t want “Santa” to bring a main gift because we can’t necessarily afford to buy even one gift.

I will admit that a big chunk of it, is that I absolutely love Santa pictures.

We do thinks a lot like how Em_in_FL described. Which is also how my parents did things. There wasn’t any lying, just letting the child believe and have fun.

** I think it is a bit sad that we take all the magic of childhood away.**

I agree! I can still remember the way I felt on Christmas mornings when I would go see the gifts “Santa” left and how magical and fun it all felt. All children should get to enjoy that. If I had known all along that “Santa” was my parents I would have been caught up in telling my parents what I wanted and on Christmas saying things like Mom I asked for this or that why didn’t you get it? etc. Believing it came from the mysterious Santa person made me more grateful and appreciative of what “he” gave me because he didn’t have to do it but I thought he was doing it out of the goodness of his heart. I would have felt like my parents “owed” me certain things since they knew me and I could tell them directly what I wanted. So “Santa” taught me to be appreciative and about generosity and giving.

I like the way you think. Why are we so intent in destroying all the customs that most of us celebrated in our childhoods. Kids are smart enough to figure out all by themselves about Santa without our even telling them. My kids all believed in Santa and they all grew up to be normal, productive human beings who then played Santa for their kids. If they ask about Santa, tell them, but don’t ruin their fantasy. They get to be children for too short a time. Let them enjoy it.

Exactly!!

 

[Skye_Ariel]

Looking back to when I was younger, I would have wanted the truth. When I figured out that he wasn’t real it was a large dissappointment and a huge adjustment.

Also, believing in Santa teaches your child to be greedy, to take and not give.

The truth may hurt, but not as much as when they figure out he doesn’t exist.

I disagree, knowing the truth all along would have made me less appreciative and I would have been caught up in telling my parents what I wanted for Christmas and disappointed if they didn’t get me exactly what I wanted because I would have felt like they owed it to me as my parents. The idea of Santa taught me to be appreciative of whatever “Santa” gave me because he didn’t have to do it, and it taught me about generosity. Plus it just was not a big deal for me when I found out by myself just from being mature enough to figure it out, I understood it was a game and tradition told to make Christmas magical and fun. I knew the difference between something told in fun as a game verses real lies and betrayals and I knew the intent with Santa was not to lie and betray, it was to make things fun and magical.

 

[itullian]

i wouldnt give up the wonderful memories of the magic of believing in Santa for anything.

thank you Mom and Dad.
i love you
GBU

 

[mary_bobo]

Do you realize that the present form of belief in Santa is only a recent USA based tradition?

And your point is… In some European countries they have been celebrating St. Nickolas for many years and he brings gifts on his feast day.

 

[Cristiano]

And your point is… In some European countries they have been celebrating St. Nickolas for many years and he brings gifts on his feast day.

My point is that some traditions are just recent inventions with pseuo cultural roots to justify them just like kwanzaa. Santa is to St. Nickolas what pre marital sex is to the honeymoon.

 

[Diana_Catherine]

I’m sorry to have to correct you. The charecture of Santa that we all know and love was first done by Thomas Nast in 1862. All subsequent Santa images are derived from the many Nast cartoons of him.
You can easily check this out by entering Nast Santa Images on any search engine.
Ho Ho Ho!!!

You’re right. He does go back farther. There are many images that were similar to what we see today.

 

[AnastasiaRomano]

No Santa Claus at my house.

FWIW, I was raised without Santa Claus – the Santa myth is not really part of my parents’ ethnic heritage, so they saw no need for Santa. My husband was raised vaguely with Santa, but mostly his mom focused on St. Nicholas. I always meant to celebrate St. Nicholas Day with my children, but every year I seem to forget… sigh.

 

[Diana_Catherine]

I disagree, knowing the truth all along would have made me less appreciative and I would have been caught up in telling my parents what I wanted for Christmas and disappointed if they didn’t get me exactly what I wanted because I would have felt like they owed it to me as my parents. The idea of Santa taught me to be appreciative of whatever “Santa” gave me because he didn’t have to do it, and it taught me about generosity. Plus it just was not a big deal for me when I found out by myself just from being mature enough to figure it out, I understood it was a game and tradition told to make Christmas magical and fun. I knew the difference between something told in fun as a game verses real lies and betrayals and I knew the intent with Santa was not to lie and betray, it was to make things fun and magical.

I am sure your parents were great but what if you parents had told you the truth about Saint Nicholas and the spirit of giving and the reasons he did what he did and why it is important to give at Christmas time.

I think most kids either tell their parents what they want or to the “fill-in” Santa’s at the malls and when they don’t get what they want are still disappointed. Thing is they are just disappointed with an imaginary person. Most parents try their best to get what their kids want. My parents were great and awesome and led us for a short time to believe in Santa. I remember how crushed I was as a young child when another child told me my parents were Santa. I can still remember the thoughts that went through my head. I wonder how different I would have felt at that time if, when I heard there wasn’t really Santa, if I already knew that the gifts came because my parents loved me and wanted to share the spirit of the real Saint Nicholas.

Either way many children in today’s society “expect” at Christmas, instead of learning to give.

As a parent we always enjoyed Santa, including him in our decorating and stories and movies but did our best not to lie and instead tell the truth about who he is and the best part of it is we can still enjoy him because we have known all along who he is. This can make Saint Nicholas Day special and part of the wonderful season of Advent.

Also, they can learn they really can talk to Saint Nick, through prayer. He is a Saint. Great being Catholic.

 

[EasterJoy]

At our house, our kids heard the Santa myths from elsewhere, but they knew from us that Santa was a pseudonym that anyone who gives in secret in imitation of St. Nicholas is allowed to use. They always went with us to the toy store to pick out toys for children their own age whose parents could not afford gifts for them, which would be “from Santa”.

When they’d ask us if Santa was real, our reply was this: "Whenever you get a present that says ‘from Santa’, it always means the person wants to give you a gift in secret, so you would not know who it was and you would give the glory to God. The Santa givers get their reward from God, so that is all you ever get to know. We are never going to tell you who presents come from when ‘Santa’ is on the label, and we’re never going to tell you who it isn’t.

We never took them to a mall to sit on the lap of some stranger in a fake beard that was pretending to be Santa Claus. We thought it would be insulting to their intelligence, even when they were little, and we thought it would put too much emphasis on what they wanted for themselves out of Christmas, instead of what they planned on doing to delight someone else, which is the whole point of the Santa myth in the end, isn’t it?

 

[SMHW]

I was waiting for this one!

:christmastree1:

You know that we can’t have Advent at CAF without a thread about whether or not Santa is problematic! (Someone should write a holiday jingle for the occasion.)

I haven’t read through the whole thread yet. Are we arguing yet about whether or not telling our children about Santa is a lie?

 

[carolynpetty]

There is no Santa Claus, telling children that there is a lie.

If other children believe in santa, then just tell your kid that they need to respect the beliefs of others.

as another poster said, there may be a st nicolas. i’m not sure.

as hard as parents work to provide for their kids it’s a wonder to me that they’re willing to give all the credit to a mythical figure.

 

[Diana_Catherine]

At our house, our kids heard the Santa myths from elsewhere, but they knew from us that Santa was a pseudonym that anyone who gives in secret in imitation of St. Nicholas is allowed to use. They always went with us to the toy store to pick out toys for children their own age whose parents could not afford gifts for them, which would be “from Santa”.

When they’d ask us if Santa was real, our reply was this: "Whenever you get a present that says ‘from Santa’, it always means the person wants to give you a gift in secret, so you would not know who it was and you would give the glory to God. The Santa givers get their reward from God, so that is all you ever get to know. We are never going to tell you who presents come from when ‘Santa’ is on the label, and we’re never going to tell you who it isn’t.

We never took them to a mall to sit on the lap of some stranger in a fake beard that was pretending to be Santa Claus. We thought it would be insulting to their intelligence, even when they were little, and we thought it would put too much emphasis on what they wanted for themselves out of Christmas, instead of what they planned on doing to delight someone else, which is the whole point of the Santa myth in the end, isn’t it?

I like that.

 

[Diana_Catherine]

:christmastree1:

You know that we can’t have Advent at CAF without a thread about whether or not Santa is problematic! (Someone should write a holiday jingle for the occasion.)

I haven’t read through the whole thread yet. Are we arguing yet about whether or not telling our children about Santa is a lie?

That’s what it’s about. I think you’re on the late show.