Should we react differently to family with mental illness?

[DarkLight]

How should we react if we think a family member has a mental illness? Especially if we know that they won’t accept or believe it? On one hand you want to show compassion, but on the other hand such people can be quite hurtful and believe they have to have things that are very inappropriate.

 

[EasterJoy]

A mental illness does not give one carte blanche to be rude, not unless one is so insane as to have no self-control. No one with an illness wants to be reminded of it all the time or have their whole character and personality attributed to it.

Learn what you can about the true nature of their challenges, put yourself in the person’s shoes, see them not as they see themselves but as Our Lord sees them, and then treat them as Our Lord would have you treat them, including the hope for mercy when you make mistakes…because you will. None of us becomes perfect in the face of the imperfections of others. Do your best, and leave the rest to the mercy of God.

 

[edwest2]

Since I have had major depression and anxiety for decades, I know most people cannot understand that emotional pain can be as bad as physical pain. Those who act out in inappropriate ways need to be understood. This understanding needs to come from a psychiatrist. If the person is verbally or physically abusive or damages things for no reason, there are certain drugs that can control this sort of behavior. In cases where the individual may harm himself or others, a psychiatrist needs to be contacted regarding hurtful/harmful behaviors. I cannot say more because I cannot give medical advice.

In my case, seeing a therapist and having a friend or family member encourage me is most helpful. I also found two group therapy groups where I could talk about my thoughts and feelings, and knowing that I was with others who “got it” helped me a lot.

Peace,
Ed

 

[DarkLight]

Trust me, I get living with mental illness quite well. The trouble is when you’re dealing with someone who is hurtful and doesn’t seem to be entirely connected to reality, and not in a position to do anything about it. Getting them to go to a doctor is completely off the table - they see nothing weird or wrong with their behavior and all bringing it up is going to do is make them angry at you for suggesting it. It’s the struggle between wanting to be compassionate, and dealing with the fact that as it stands the person is toxic. I’m not sure where the duty lies there.

 

[edwest2]

Trust me, I get living with mental illness quite well. The trouble is when you’re dealing with someone who is hurtful and doesn’t seem to be entirely connected to reality, and not in a position to do anything about it. Getting them to go to a doctor is completely off the table - they see nothing weird or wrong with their behavior and all bringing it up is going to do is make them angry at you for suggesting it. It’s the struggle between wanting to be compassionate, and dealing with the fact that as it stands the person is toxic. I’m not sure where the duty lies there.

If I had a family member in this condition, I would consult with a psychiatrist and then a social worker. Then I would petition for guardianship or get a “power of attorney.” They can advise you further as to what to do. Being not “entirely connected to reality” and by that person not seeing anything wrong with their behavior means you can act to make sure that person gets the care he needs. Again, talk to a social worker and a psychiatrist and they can advise you further.

Best,
Ed

 

[DarkLight]

If I had a family member in this condition, I would consult with a psychiatrist and then a social worker. Then I would petition for guardianship or get a “power of attorney.” They can advise you further as to what to do. Being not “entirely connected to reality” and by that person not seeing anything wrong with their behavior means you can act to make sure that person gets the care he needs. Again, talk to a social worker and a psychiatrist and they can advise you further.

Best,
Ed

Wait what? No one should ever be locked up or have guardianship of their own lives taken from them for not being 100% in touch with reality! As someone with mental illness myself that’s a pretty offensive suggestion - I have panic attacks sometimes where it’s hard to tell exactly what’s going on and what’s just me being afraid, does that mean I shouldn’t be able to be an adult and should have a guardian over me?

 

[DarkLight]

We’re not talking about someone who’s incompetent. We’re talking about someone who is, say, highly anxious and something of a hypochondriac. And then gets extremely upset if other people don’t “take care of themselves” properly or bring germs in or something. When it’s evident to any reasonable person that this individual is seeing illness everywhere, but the person just thinks they’re trying to take care of themselves and their loved ones and can’t understand why those loved ones object to being examined and grilled and told that they need to see a different doctor.