Sickness and faith

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Rollypollyjelly

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Hello, I have recently been diagnosed with cancer. I’m 23 and I don’t have much family alive anymore, I am now trying to face this on my own with the help of my friends but it’s getting harder…
My whole life I have always felt the presence of Jesus surrounding me, and it gave me a feeling of belonging and safety wherever I went. I knew that whatever the challenge, the Holy spirit would be there to help me get through it and that I needed not to be afraid. Lately as the disease got worse I had less opportunity to go to church or see my friends, spending a lot of time sleeping or being really ill…
It’s getting really hard to feel the presence anymore. I feel lonely now and even though I pray I feel like I’ve lost the connection. I’m scared and angry as well because I feel like I’m abandoned even though I tried my best to live my life following the bible and to become a good and helping person. I feel like I’m losing my best asset when I need it the most, and it feels unfair.

I don’t know what to do, do you think I’m losing faith ? Is this normal, and what should I do, is there a verse I should read ?
Thank you all for reading!
 
You are not alone!

My daughter was in your exact situation as are many people. Does your church visit the ill with communion? Can you schedule an appointment with a favorite priest? Do you enjoy listening to contemporary Christian music on the radio or Pandora or Spotify? I enjoy just taking to God (and crying and laughing). I enjoy daily meditations - something small but will give you some food for thought. I can give you a lot of the standard answers but I would rather encourage you to do whatever you find that is uplifting to you.

My prayers are with you and know that miracles happen every day (we just don’t always see them as miracles)!
 
Hi rollypollyjelly,

I am so very sorry that you are so very ill. 😦

Welcome to the forum, first of all. 🙂

I think that it is normal to feel all different kinds of emotions, especially when we are ill.

I don’t have cancer in particular, but I do have many health issues, and when a new one comes up that I have to deal with on top of all of the other ones, it can get to be a bit much for me, too. I think that it’s human nature to get upset at times. Sometimes, there is only so much that we can bear, but we get through it with the grace of God.

Do I think that you are losing faith? That is only a question that you can really answer.

When we are going through difficult times, I think that we would have to look at our spiritual behavior and other types of behavior, perhaps, to answer that question.

If it were me, I would ask myself things like: Have I felt like turning away from God and from His Church? Have I stopped praying? Am I doing things that would make me want to turn away from God?

You don’t have to answer me, but these are some things that you can think about as you read this.

When times get tough for me, I just keep holding on to my faith. I keep on praying.

One of my favorite Bible verses, is one that I have posted before, and that is Matthew 6:26:

biblehub.com/matthew/6-26.htm:

Matthew 6:26: “Look at the birds of the air, that they do not sow, nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not worth much more than they?”

Reading this verse always comforts me, and reminds me of how very much God cares for each one of us, and how much He really loves each one of us.

Take heart, dear one. Know that others are thinking of you.

If you are concerned about your faith and falling away from it, I would encourage you to talk to your pastor, too.

Prayers said for you, for your comfort and for your healing.

God bless you!
 
Rollypollyjelly said:
Hello, I have recently been diagnosed with cancer. I’m 23 and I don’t have much family alive anymore, I am now trying to face this on my own with the help of my friends but it’s getting harder…
My whole life I have always felt the presence of Jesus surrounding me, and it gave me a feeling of belonging and safety wherever I went. I knew that whatever the challenge, the Holy spirit would be there to help me get through it and that I needed not to be afraid. Lately as the disease got worse I had less opportunity to go to church or see my friends, spending a lot of time sleeping or being really ill…
It’s getting really hard to feel the presence anymore. I feel lonely now and even though I pray I feel like I’ve lost the connection. I’m scared and angry as well because I feel like I’m abandoned even though I tried my best to live my life following the bible and to become a good and helping person. I feel like I’m losing my best asset when I need it the most, and it feels unfair.

I don’t know what to do, do you think I’m losing faith ? Is this normal, and what should I do, is there a verse I should read ?
Thank you all for reading!
Click to expand...
1 Peter 1:3-9: “Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! By his great mercy we have been born anew to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, and to an inheritance which is imperishable, undefiled, and unfading, kept in heaven for you, who by God’s power are guarded through faith for a salvation ready to be revealed in the last time. In this you rejoice, though now for a little while you may have to suffer various trials, so that the genuineness of your faith, more precious than gold which though perishable is tested by fire, may redound to praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ. Without having seen him you love him; though you do not now see him you believe in him and rejoice with unutterable and exalted joy. As the outcome of your faith you obtain the salvation of your souls.”

James 1:2-4: “Count it all joy, my brethren, when you meet various trials, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.”

Remember that Jesus is with you and that He loves you! Do not mistake feelings for His presence; sometimes we are given spiritual consolations (feelings etc) but other times those consolations are withdrawn and, ultimately, for our own good so that we will not become attached to those feelings but to focus on the One that those consolations point toward. Indeed we can go through ‘deserts’ and periods of desolation in our spiritual journey, and it sounds like you are going through one now. Fear not, even some of the greatest Saints have gone through such! Pray all the more diligently and focus on God all the more, even when it feels hard. Let this be a time of a deeper conversion, not for despair.

I shall say a prayer for you.

Pax Domini sit semper tecum!
 
Thank you all for your kind words and prayers. I am glad to say it had a huge impact on me. First of all I felt less lonely, and for that I thank all of you who answered me. Secondly I prayed for all of you, and for my friends, and I stopped praying for myself. It is amazing what good it did to me, because the moment I stopped focusing on my own illness, demanding the Lord that He helped and protected me… The moment I instead started thanking Him for his blessings again and asked Him to guard other people, that’s when I felt the light upon me again.

I was truly selfish, thinking that my disease was a curse and only thinking about it, I forgot that His holy light is cast all over my life, even in this time of sickness. I also forgot that others around me are a blessing, and that I do want them blessed by His light too.

I am getting surgery in the summer but I am not afraid anymore. I know that His plan guides me, even if it’s through dry land sometimes, I have to keep following where He leads me. And I know that if it is His plan to call me back to Him, He will take my hand during the whole journey and welcome me in His light. I think it is the most beautiful gift. I rejoice in the fact that I get to live the wonderful experience of having my friends closest to me now, and having all those people I don’t even know praying for me, I truly feel blessed again.

I moved a while ago and I was still going to my old church, which is quite far. Instead I went to a small chapel near my place and met the priest there. It’s much easier that way and allows me to go to church more often (I hope). He seems very loving and kind so I think I’ll try to grab the opportunity to really speak with him next Sunday.

Again, thank you all very much, and I can’t tell you how much your kind words and prayers meant to me.

Love,
Jelly
 
Rollypollyjelly said:
Thank you all for your kind words and prayers. I am glad to say it had a huge impact on me. First of all I felt less lonely, and for that I thank all of you who answered me. Secondly I prayed for all of you, and for my friends, and I stopped praying for myself. It is amazing what good it did to me, because the moment I stopped focusing on my own illness, demanding the Lord that He helped and protected me… The moment I instead started thanking Him for his blessings again and asked Him to guard other people, that’s when I felt the light upon me again.

I was truly selfish, thinking that my disease was a curse and only thinking about it, I forgot that His holy light is cast all over my life, even in this time of sickness. I also forgot that others around me are a blessing, and that I do want them blessed by His light too.

I am getting surgery in the summer but I am not afraid anymore. I know that His plan guides me, even if it’s through dry land sometimes, I have to keep following where He leads me. And I know that if it is His plan to call me back to Him, He will take my hand during the whole journey and welcome me in His light. I think it is the most beautiful gift. I rejoice in the fact that I get to live the wonderful experience of having my friends closest to me now, and having all those people I don’t even know praying for me, I truly feel blessed again.

I moved a while ago and I was still going to my old church, which is quite far. Instead I went to a small chapel near my place and met the priest there. It’s much easier that way and allows me to go to church more often (I hope). He seems very loving and kind so I think I’ll try to grab the opportunity to really speak with him next Sunday.

Again, thank you all very much, and I can’t tell you how much your kind words and prayers meant to me.

Love,
Jelly
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👍

I am glad to hear that you are feeling better; it sounds like you are on the right track. And thank you for the prayers!

Keep it up and hang in there! 😉
 
Hi Jelly,

Thanks for coming back and letting us know how you are doing and feeling. 🙂

Thanks for the prayers, too. I am glad that you are feeling better spiritually.

I wish you all of the best with your upcoming surgery.

Please let us know how you are doing.

God bless you! 🙂
 
Hey there Jelly,

I am a double cancer survivor. I think you’ve hit on the answer. You’ve turned to God with an open heart. He’ll guide you on the rest. I went through similar feelings on my first bout with cancer. It’s very easy to become self-centered on our wants and needs. But once I turned it over to God, as you said “the light came back”.

Saying prayers of strength and healing for you.

God Bless you.
 
Jelly, you are on my prayer list.

***Hail Mary,
Full of Grace,
The Lord is with thee.
Blessed art thou among women,
and blessed is the fruit
of thy womb,
Jesus.
Holy Mary,
Mother of God,
pray for us sinners now,
and at the hour of our death
Amen.

:crossrc:***
 
Hello. I am sorry you are having such serious health issues at such a young age and it doesn’t sound like you have much family to support you. I think it is very normal to have a crisis of faith when you are experiencing loneliness and severe health problems. I have definitely gone through my times of crisis with my faith. Many times good things come out of it. I finally converted to Catholicism in my mid-fifties.
I think loneliness and not having support can affect our faith also.
Keep praying and keep the faith.
 
It has been known for some years that cancer also produces hormones that cause depression. Part of the disease and that makes it easier to deal with feelings. I have an illness that does this too so I just ignore those feelings. Also many things of this kind have a pattern during the day; I know is something bad happens say after 3 pm I can go off the rails very easily so learn to close down here etc before then, The welfare issue letter arrived too late in the day! Just learning the patterns
 
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