*sigh* DH...

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PatienceAndLove

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We had an interesting chat today.
DH thinks Christianity, as well as all other religions, are man made and that religion is “the opiate of the masses to keep them down”. I don’t even know where to begin…

All I can do right now is pray. But it is so disheartening… to see the man I love deny my Lord and my God.
We can’t even talk about religions without me getting upset, so we don’t. He comes to Mass with wee mite and I every so often, but mostly not. She asks where papa is, and I tell her he stayed home because he’s sick. She takes my word for it and doesn’t question. But it still hurts. How do I tell her that papa thinks what mama believes in is silly? I can’t do that…

All I can do is pray…
 
First off…don’t lie to your child. You should tell her the truth and add that she needs to pray really hard for her Daddy so that God’s grace will reach his soul.
I had a similar problem with my ex, which is why I understand the wisdom of not marrying someone who does not share the faith. My ex would come to mass with us most of the time, though he shared none of my beliefs and once we were married decided he wasn’t as interested in Catholicism as he had been when we were dating. He would skip mass when he had an opportunity to golf…now, that is fun to explain to the kids but I was honest with them. He never prayed with us and God was never a daily part of his life. Perhaps this is why he has not seen our daughters in 8 years…he has no moral compass, then again, I believe it is easier to raise my children without someone teaching them the opposite of what I do.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not telling you to leave him, but it sounds as though you have a situation which will prove to be dangerous to your child’s soul if he starts spouting that old tire rhetoric of ‘religion, the opiates of the masses’ to your little one. So pray unceasingly for his soul and the soul of your daughter. Good luck.
 
I second the advice of telling your daughter the truth. She can help pray for him.

I will keep your family in my prayers. :signofcross:
 
PatienceAndLove said:
We had an interesting chat today.
DH thinks Christianity, as well as all other religions, are man made and that religion is “the opiate of the masses to keep them down”. I don’t even know where to begin…

All I can do right now is pray. But it is so disheartening… to see the man I love deny my Lord and my God.
We can’t even talk about religions without me getting upset, so we don’t. He comes to Mass with wee mite and I every so often, but mostly not. She asks where papa is, and I tell her he stayed home because he’s sick. She takes my word for it and doesn’t question. But it still hurts. How do I tell her that papa thinks what mama believes in is silly? I can’t do that…

All I can do is pray…
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Kris {{{hug}}}

That “opiate of the masses” junk if pure Marx!!! Your DH probably thinks he is being very intellectual. He doesn’t realize how stupid it makes him sound.

What you have to do here is agree to disagree. He is not allowed to harass you about religion or how you practice it (or raise the children in it) and you won’t bring it up to him. Will that seem fair to him?

Yes, it is lonely. I watched my mother sit in a pew with just her children for decades. And children who don’t see their father practice religion are more likely not to continue to practice after they grow up. I know this not from statistics, but because two of my brothers don’t practice anything (one claims to be Buddhist, one Druid- That’s what they say, but it certainly frees up their Sunday), one sister is Lutheran, and one is whatever strikes her fancy at the moment. That leaves 3 out 7 Catholic.

The good news: You can pray for him all you want. And you should get the kids praying for him as soon as they are old enough.

And the prayer does work. My father came back to the Faith after many decades. Now, my mother tells me he is almost a pest about going to Mass.:rolleyes:
 
OutinChgoburbs said:
Kris {{{hug}}}

That “opiate of the masses” junk if pure Marx!!! Your DH probably thinks he is being very intellectual. He doesn’t realize how stupid it makes him sound.

What you have to do here is agree to disagree. He is not allowed to harass you about religion or how you practice it (or raise the children in it) and you won’t bring it up to him. Will that seem fair to him?

Yes, it is lonely. I watched my mother sit in a pew with just her children for decades. And children who don’t see their father practice religion are more likely not to continue to practice after they grow up. I know this not from statistics, but because two of my brothers don’t practice anything (one claims to be Buddhist, one Druid- That’s what they say, but it certainly frees up their Sunday), one sister is Lutheran, and one is whatever strikes her fancy at the moment. That leaves 3 out 7 Catholic.

The good news: You can pray for him all you want. And you should get the kids praying for him as soon as they are old enough.

And the prayer does work. My father came back to the Faith after many decades. Now, my mother tells me he is almost a pest about going to Mass.:rolleyes:
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You are right with the Marx thing, now that I think about it… he does try REALLY hard to be an intellectual…

And he doesn’t harrass me about it. He’s actually agreed to raise our children Catholic and will not undermine me.

He throws me some curveballs, and I think this was one of them.

We went and toured Atonement while we were in San Antonio, and he was very impressed with the school and the Church. Said a lot of nice encouraging things about it.

I guess St. Monica and I are going to be good friends!
 
When I say “harass” I mean insenstive comments like “opiate of the masses” and such. I don’t mean he hectors you all the live long day. My suggestion would be that he can’t throw you “cruveballs” and you will not talk to him about religion.

And see- Our Lady of Atonement is a pretty inspiring place!
 
PatienceAndLove said:
We had an interesting chat today.
DH thinks Christianity, as well as all other religions, are man made and that religion is “the opiate of the masses to keep them down”. I don’t even know where to begin…
Click to expand...
My goodness, that is such an old school Marxist quote I don’t know how he can even say it with a straight face. Haven’t heard that one in years . . .
 
OutinChgoburbs said:
When I say “harass” I mean insenstive comments like “opiate of the masses” and such. I don’t mean he hectors you all the live long day. My suggestion would be that he can’t throw you “cruveballs” and you will not talk to him about religion.

And see- Our Lady of Atonement is a pretty inspiring place!
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I see. Thanks for the clarification!
 
Does your man happen to be a reader? I’m currently going through Ratzinger’s Introduction to Christianity. It explains the Creed in a very thorough, intellectual way in response to the modern context, of which our friend Herr Marx is a part.

Anyhow, that’s just a bit of practical advice. My heart goes out to you.
 
mizznicole said:
Does your man happen to be a reader? I’m currently going through Ratzinger’s Introduction to Christianity. It explains the Creed in a very thorough, intellectual way in response to the modern context, of which our friend Herr Marx is a part.

Anyhow, that’s just a bit of practical advice. My heart goes out to you.
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He “has no time for ‘light’ reading” (as in anything that isn’t part of his MPA program or Law school). I am trying though.
He was raised Baptist/Non-Denom… so I think that has something to do with it (not sure what, but I have an inkling that in influences something)
 
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