{sigh} Man problem

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She only *likes you * likes you if she passes it through her best friend
 
The OP might find this article interesting its a study that found that men tend to overestimate women’s interest in them and women tend to underestimate interest. Also the more attractive the woman the more likely the man is to interpret the womans interest in him.

sciencedaily.com/releases/2011/12/111213132001.htm

btw, i think from what you described he was flirting with you
 
DeniseNY said:
She only *likes you * likes you if she passes it through her best friend
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Funny background story: my (now) wife and I were in one middle school class together in 6th grade before I transferred to Catholic school, meanwhile she stayed in public school.

We didn’t really meet each other until about ten years later.

However, we both remembered that she used to pass me notes in 6th grade, before we really knew each other too well.

I insist that this means she liked me, liked me as early as 6th grade, while she claims she only liked me at the time, not liked, liked. This has been a source of constant disagreement in our relationship… 😛

To answer your question though, she passed them directly. So you’re saying she’s right… she only liked me X1 not liked, liked? 😦
 
VeritasLuxMea said:
OK everyone, so when a girl passes you a note in middle school, do you think she just likes you or does that mean she probably likes you, likes you? 😛
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Most likely interested but don’t promise yourself too much, she’s still finding out. When you ask a girl out openly, you’re still at the stage of finding out if she’s nice or not (to you). So don’t go in with too big expectations. 🙂
LucyLight said:
The OP might find this article interesting its a study that found that men tend to overestimate women’s interest in them and women tend to underestimate interest.
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Consistent with my life experience. BUT you need to realise that men aren’t dumb when it comes to reading people, including women. For example, some men are quite good at it, e.g. I tend to read women better than they read themselves. And interest in another person is about the easiest thing ever to read in someone’s body language. It’s actually awfully easy if you have any knowledge of biology (e.g. it affects blood flow, which affects what skin looks like, but there are more signs). I suspect women think men can’t have read something (something which they are denying ever happened) while those same men actually really have read it. Half a year later that same woman can actually phone you and say okay, I do think I was silly to lose my chance with you, do you still want to meet up? Just so you know.
Also the more attractive the woman the more likely the man is to interpret the womans interest in him.
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Or rather if a man’s more attracted he’s obviously going to pay more attention to signs than when he’s less attracted. This probably accounts for a lot of things that an egghead or two may be missing. Trust a criminal lawyer on this. As a criminal lawyer I’m an expert on human nature by definition, aren’t I.
 
chevalier said:
Most likely interested but don’t promise yourself too much, she’s still finding out. When you ask a girl out openly, you’re still at the stage of finding out if she’s nice or not (to you). So don’t go in with too big expectations. 🙂

Consistent with my life experience. BUT you need to realise that men aren’t dumb when it comes to reading people, including women. For example, some men are quite good at it, e.g. I tend to read women better than they read themselves. And interest in another person is about the easiest thing ever to read in someone’s body language. It’s actually awfully easy if you have any knowledge of biology (e.g. it affects blood flow, which affects what skin looks like, but there are more signs). I suspect women think men can’t have read something (something which they are denying ever happened) while those same men actually really have read it. Half a year later that same woman can actually phone you and say okay, I do think I was silly to lose my chance with you, do you still want to meet up? Just so you know.

Or rather if a man’s more attracted he’s obviously going to pay more attention to signs than when he’s less attracted. This probably accounts for a lot of things that an egghead or two may be missing. Trust a criminal lawyer on this. As a criminal lawyer I’m an expert on human nature by definition, aren’t I.
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Honestly I think you give yourself a lot of credit. 🙂

I highly suspect there’s more then one sign you’ve misread in your lifetime. That said, I tend to think I’m fairly good at judging if a guy is interested in me or not. And I can usually spot when a guy is interested in another girl or not as well. I’ve been wrong but there ARE signs, you’re right.

However, there are also exceptions to every rule. We are not just biology. We are not just behavior. There’s a lot more involved.

For example, I might find a man physically attractive and respond biologically to his presence but I might also find his personality completely repugnant. So while I enjoy having him around - eye candy! - I’m not actually interested in anything more then just enjoying the view.
 
Your last sentence is more or less what I was talking about, at least part of what I was addressing. Women may be somewhat better at reading people than men, on average, but men aren’t necessarily clueless, contrary to what women tend to think. A woman of a mixed mind will likely send mixed signals the man will likely pick up.
 
chevalier said:
Your last sentence is more or less what I was talking about, at least part of what I was addressing. Women may be somewhat better at reading people than men, on average, but men aren’t necessarily clueless, contrary to what women tend to think. A woman of a mixed mind will likely send mixed signals the man will likely pick up.
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🙂

And sometimes women are just being nice and the guys misread and/or a guy is just being nice and the girls misread. It’s a really complicated business being kind to people…
 
If the ring wasn’t there and it is now, he could be sending you the message that he isn’t available. Within Mass isn’t the time or place to share smiles (or to flirt) to indicate you are interested.

Possibly he initially found your attention flattering, it may also have disturbed his mind, enough to make him feel he needed to take a stand and wear his ring.
Unless you wish to potentially cause him temptation that may weigh on his conscience,
and also to avoid making Mass an uncomfortable experience
as well as to avoid making it about personal feelings, you might be wise to avoid looking at him.
Let him start to think it was nothing really…and that perhaps he imagined something that wasn’t there.
 
Trishie said:
If the ring wasn’t there and it is now, he could be sending you the message that he isn’t available. Within Mass isn’t the time or place to share smiles (or to flirt) to indicate you are interested.

Possibly he initially found your attention flattering, it may also have disturbed his mind, enough to make him feel he needed to take a stand and wear his ring.
Unless you wish to potentially cause him temptation that may weigh on his conscience,
and also to avoid making Mass an uncomfortable experience
as well as to avoid making it about personal feelings, you might be wise to avoid looking at him.
Let him start to think it was nothing really…and that perhaps he imagined something that wasn’t there.
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Trishie, I agree. I don’t wish to cause any temptation or distraction. The last couple of days, I’ve been very aware of not looking in his direction and focusing on Mass, and only Mass.
 
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