Signs of being called to priesthood?

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Mortification

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Are there any tall tale signs that have shown up time and time again through peoples’ lives that leave no question as to whether they are being called or is it different for everyone?

I have never been involved in a serious relationship with anyone. EVER. I am 24 years of age, I feel a burning desire to do something with my life, I just do not know what. I try music, I try weightlifting, I engage in so many activities and after doing them for such a time, in the end they seem meaningless. My job at work which offers benefits, pays my bills and even bought me the car I wanted hardly seems fulfilling anymore and I realize it isn’t anywhere near the kind of importance I thought it had in life. I don’t know if I’m depressed or if God is steering me towards something greater. I am a bit of a loner as I do not have the same mindset as most people my age. I also struggle very much with intense feelings of lust, but deep down I feel like I am also very lonely and would like to experience true love and companionship. I don’t know if I’m being selfish and choosing the self over what God wants in desiring this need to find love, but it is confusing me. Do vocations confuse people or are people left with absolutely no doubt in their minds when they are genuinely called?

Thanks.
 
Mortification said:
Are there any tall tale signs that have shown up time and time again through peoples’ lives that leave no question as to whether they are being called or is it different for everyone?

I have never been involved in a serious relationship with anyone. EVER. I am 24 years of age, I feel a burning desire to do something with my life, I just do not know what. I try music, I try weightlifting, I engage in so many activities and after doing them for such a time, in the end they seem meaningless. My job at work which offers benefits, pays my bills and even bought me the car I wanted hardly seems fulfilling anymore and I realize it isn’t anywhere near the kind of importance I thought it had in life. I don’t know if I’m depressed or if God is steering me towards something greater. I am a bit of a loner as I do not have the same mindset as most people my age. I also struggle very much with intense feelings of lust, but deep down I feel like I am also very lonely and would like to experience true love and companionship. I don’t know if I’m being selfish and choosing the self over what God wants in desiring this need to find love, but it is confusing me. Do vocations confuse people or are people left with absolutely no doubt in their minds when they are genuinely called?

Thanks.
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Some folks have an overwhelming sense of vocation, like St John Bosco, who found himself exclaiming to his friends, age 12, “I want to be a priest”. For others, it’s a slow dawning realisation.

For me, it’s certainly confusing, and I still don’t know what I’m supposed to do with my life. My spiritual director’s advice (do you have one? if you don’t, get one. Approach a priest, deacon or religious brother you trust, tell him you’re discerning a vocation, ask if he’ll give you direction) is to go where I find joy in the Lord - for example, I’ve enjoyed working at a local soup kitchen, doing work with the Legion of Mary, and I feel a real call to a deeper knowledge of Scripture. I also can imagine being happy to find a wife, and am increasingly getting to think that I’d make a good Deacon some day.

But enough about me. What makes you happy? God calls people to a ‘higher’ vocation, i.e. to the priesthood or religious life, from a position of joy, from a natural good to a supernatural good. Dissatisfaction with the world may be a sign, but not if it’s just a case of giving up on ever finding a meaningful career or a meaningful relationship. I’ve certainly been where you are - I think it’s normal when you graduate high school or college to have all kinds of dreams about where you’ll be when you get out into the real world, especially if, like you and me, you didn’t have many friends or girlfriends during those years, it can then be quite disappointing when those dreams don’t come true right away.

You say “I don’t know if I’m being selfish and choosing the self over what God wants in desiring this need to find love”

What do you mean “desiring this need” - people don’t desire a need. I don’t desire the need to have food, I just need food to survive. We all need love. Do you believe that God loves you? Where do you feel His love most? In loving and giving yourself in marriage and fatherhood? In the love of a parish community? In the solitude of prayer? All of these could be a sign of where God wants you to be to experience and transmit His love to the world.

I’ve just recently managed to wriggle free from an endless cycle of saying to myself “I want to want to want the priesthood, but I can’t want it, because I don’t want to want it, but I want to want to want it” - that’s nonsense reasoning. You can’t desire the need for love, you HAVE a need for love.

I’m not saying you don’t have a vocation. I’m just saying, well, frankly, cheer up, and if you’re serious about discerning, go find a spiritual director! (Now to go take the log out of my own eye 😊 )
 
please schedule a visit with the vocations director of your diocese, there are classic aids to discernment in Catholic spirituality, the direction of St. Ignatius among them. In fact, read the story of his life, there are some parallels with yours.
 
DL82 said:
Some folks have an overwhelming sense of vocation, like St John Bosco, who found himself exclaiming to his friends, age 12, “I want to be a priest”. For others, it’s a slow dawning realisation.

For me, it’s certainly confusing, and I still don’t know what I’m supposed to do with my life. My spiritual director’s advice (do you have one? if you don’t, get one. Approach a priest, deacon or religious brother you trust, tell him you’re discerning a vocation, ask if he’ll give you direction) is to go where I find joy in the Lord - for example, I’ve enjoyed working at a local soup kitchen, doing work with the Legion of Mary, and I feel a real call to a deeper knowledge of Scripture. I also can imagine being happy to find a wife, and am increasingly getting to think that I’d make a good Deacon some day.

But enough about me. What makes you happy? God calls people to a ‘higher’ vocation, i.e. to the priesthood or religious life, from a position of joy, from a natural good to a supernatural good. Dissatisfaction with the world may be a sign, but not if it’s just a case of giving up on ever finding a meaningful career or a meaningful relationship. I’ve certainly been where you are - I think it’s normal when you graduate high school or college to have all kinds of dreams about where you’ll be when you get out into the real world, especially if, like you and me, you didn’t have many friends or girlfriends during those years, it can then be quite disappointing when those dreams don’t come true right away.

You say “I don’t know if I’m being selfish and choosing the self over what God wants in desiring this need to find love”

What do you mean “desiring this need” - people don’t desire a need. I don’t desire the need to have food, I just need food to survive. We all need love. Do you believe that God loves you? Where do you feel His love most? In loving and giving yourself in marriage and fatherhood? In the love of a parish community? In the solitude of prayer? All of these could be a sign of where God wants you to be to experience and transmit His love to the world.

I’ve just recently managed to wriggle free from an endless cycle of saying to myself “I want to want to want the priesthood, but I can’t want it, because I don’t want to want it, but I want to want to want it” - that’s nonsense reasoning. You can’t desire the need for love, you HAVE a need for love.

I’m not saying you don’t have a vocation. I’m just saying, well, frankly, cheer up, and if you’re serious about discerning, go find a spiritual director! (Now to go take the log out of my own eye 😊 )
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When I was younger and in the 8th grade I had thought about it, but I think my reasoning then was a bit immature and probably selfish if anything. I might also add that I was away from the Church for a couple of years, living in a very non-Catholic way, however even when I was sinning severely I felt miserable still and again the feelings of complete and utter loneliness and unfulfillment persisted.

What I meant about ‘desiring this need’ was, would it be selfish of myself to FULFILL this need of marital love (get married, just to clarify), since it would be gratifying MY needs and wants here on this earth (at least in theory)? The harder thing to do would be to set aside my personal desires and do what God wants, but then again I feel like I have OCD with certain things and perhaps I’m just over-analyzing everything.
 
Mortification said:
When I was younger and in the 8th grade I had thought about it, but I think my reasoning then was a bit immature and probably selfish if anything. I might also add that I was away from the Church for a couple of years, living in a very non-Catholic way, however even when I was sinning severely I felt miserable still and again the feelings of complete and utter loneliness and unfulfillment persisted.

What I meant about ‘desiring this need’ was, would it be selfish of myself to FULFILL this need of marital love (get married, just to clarify), since it would be gratifying MY needs and wants here on this earth (at least in theory)? The harder thing to do would be to set aside my personal desires and do what God wants, but then again I feel like I have OCD with certain things and perhaps I’m just over-analyzing everything.
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If you feel an attraction to the priesthood, the first thing to do is to speak with someone about it. That has been advised above. Equally important is exposure. Visit thediocesan seminary and some religious houses of formation. You will get an opportunity to observe. If you still feel an attraction, try a come and see. When you feel that you are home, then you can begin the formal process of application.

Always remember, the fact that you feel an attraction is not a sign of a calling from Christ. There are only two people who have the authority to speak for Christ. If you’re joining a diocese that would be the bishop. If you’re joining a religious community that would be the major superior or the brothers in a vote. Christ’s call is confirmed through them. But the important thing is to test your level of comfort and interest. Unless you spend time with these people and speak to them, you won’t get a good measure. Don’t think about it so much. It does not work that way. Pray and make the contacts.

Fraternally,

Br. JR, OSF 🙂
 
i feel like i am in the same postion as you man. lately i have been strugling with getting my life together and i am 26 and i want to get my life together so very badly. 3 years ago i thought i decied i wanted to become a fire figther/ paramedic. and have a wife and kids. and for a while it seemed so right that i finally made the right decison but than out of no where all that came crashing down and it seems the worse i let things slide the worse they. get lately i been trying everything all over agian with my carrer and my love life but everything just gets harder paramedic school does not make as much sense to me as it use to. and it is harder and harder with my work and school schedule to go out and find someone. but as i said i know what u r going through man can anyone help me as well as him is the priesthood and or religous life right for me or am i just in panic mood right now.
 
I was born and raised Catholic. I love my faith, but every church I’ve ever gone to someone has told me I would make a great priest. I am now considering it and am actively discerning it. I just am not sure. My mom and dad seem to be doing all they can to say its not for me and never will be, but I feel otherwise and am just not sure. I don’t know if I am being called or if I just want to be able to run away from heartbreak that comes out of every relationship I’ve ever been in. I’ve been broken up with for so many reasons surrounding my faith. Its the only thing I try to focus my entire life around, because I feel it is so right for me. Help please? God Bless, and may he keep us all on his path.
 
It could be as simple as this:

Two weeks ago our parish priest was talking about religious vocations during his homily. I bent down and asked my 11 year old son if he wanted to be a priest, he replied “I don’t know, maybe”.

After a moment he then asked in a very earnest tone “Why, did you sign me up for something?”

The priest gave our row a very stern look as several other parents in the area choked back laughter.
 
IsHeCalling said:
I was born and raised Catholic. I love my faith, but every church I’ve ever gone to someone has told me I would make a great priest. I am now considering it and am actively discerning it. I just am not sure. My mom and dad seem to be doing all they can to say its not for me and never will be, but I feel otherwise and am just not sure. I don’t know if I am being called or if I just want to be able to run away from heartbreak that comes out of every relationship I’ve ever been in. I’ve been broken up with for so many reasons surrounding my faith. Its the only thing I try to focus my entire life around, because I feel it is so right for me. Help please? God Bless, and may he keep us all on his path.
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I think any single man under the age of 40 who is involved in his church will find someone telling him he would make a great priest.

In fact, I think being a Catholic lady of a certain age who constantly tells young men they would make good priests is a vocation in its own right! I met one such woman in the Legion of Mary, a married Irish lady who just had this incredible ability to ask the right questions at the right time, to just say ‘will you not give it some thought’ in a way that made you feel like your whole life was about to change.

At the end of the day, it’s something you need to work out in prayer and with the aid of a good spiritual director. And there’s nothing wrong with admitting that you wouldn’t be able to cope without a wife (although maybe once you’re married you’ll wonder whether you’ll be able to cope with a wife 😛 ) married people have a vocation to serve God too.

After a long time discerning back and forth, am pleased to now be engaged to be married 😃
 
Almost no one has absolute certainty about his vocation, especially because the real vocation is when the bishop calls the candidate for ordination, and he answers : Here I am.

The preparation to the priesthood is 6-8 years (unless you finished Catholic College w/ philosophy major), and it is definitely enough for discernment in your part and on the part of your superiors in the seminary.

In my opinion even I someone will be not called for ordination, the seminary years mean enrichment, and make the life fuller.

In every diocese used the be exploring priesthood weekends which is a good start.
 
You mention that you are a bit of a loner…a Priest must be very friendly and outgoing and willing to give 100% of his time in service to others.

You mention that you feel unfullfilled and that music, weightling and other stuff doesn’t do it for you.

Why don’t you look into volunteering. Join Habitat for Humanity, contact a Soup Kitchen, contact a Half-way house for recovering addicts. Give of yourself to others and you may not only find the fulfillment you are searching for, but you might also meet a young woman who you would want to know better.

At the same time, check with your Archdiocese - they should have a website…I will help you find it if you want - and contact the Director of Vocations and schedule a meeting with him.

Above all else…pray…attend Adoration where you can sit in the presence of the Lord and talk with him. But do not forget to sit and simply listen for his answer as well.
 
Maureen1125 said:
You mention that you are a bit of a loner…a Priest must be very friendly and outgoing and willing to give 100% of his time in service to others.

You mention that you feel unfullfilled and that music, weightling and other stuff doesn’t do it for you.

Why don’t you look into volunteering. Join Habitat for Humanity, contact a Soup Kitchen, contact a Half-way house for recovering addicts. Give of yourself to others and you may not only find the fulfillment you are searching for, but you might also meet a young woman who you would want to know better.

At the same time, check with your Archdiocese - they should have a website…I will help you find it if you want - and contact the Director of Vocations and schedule a meeting with him.

Above all else…pray…attend Adoration where you can sit in the presence of the Lord and talk with him. But do not forget to sit and simply listen for his answer as well.
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I mention that I am a bit of a loner because I do not share the same mentality and way of life as my fellow peers and do not follow trends associated with pop culture of any kind. They would all rather be out drowning themselves in alcohol, chasing women, and generally not caring about religion or their faith. They follow what it means to be a person in their 20’s, not Catholicism. Although I like to have fun myself, and sometimes fall victim to sins, it is never fulfilling and I do not even enjoy it. I feel sad everytime I fall and let God down, whereas people my age actually want to and strive to achieve the very things that I dread doing.

I still am open to God’s will, whatever that may be, but right now for the time being I’m focusing on being a better Catholic and focusing on understanding my faith more.

Thank you all for your replies.
 
Mortification said:
Are there any tall tale signs that have shown up time and time again through peoples’ lives that leave no question as to whether they are being called or is it different for everyone?

I have never been involved in a serious relationship with anyone. EVER. I am 24 years of age, I feel a burning desire to do something with my life, I just do not know what. I try music, I try weightlifting, I engage in so many activities and after doing them for such a time, in the end they seem meaningless. My job at work which offers benefits, pays my bills and even bought me the car I wanted hardly seems fulfilling anymore and I realize it isn’t anywhere near the kind of importance I thought it had in life. I don’t know if I’m depressed or if God is steering me towards something greater. I am a bit of a loner as I do not have the same mindset as most people my age. I also struggle very much with intense feelings of lust, but deep down I feel like I am also very lonely and would like to experience true love and companionship. I don’t know if I’m being selfish and choosing the self over what God wants in desiring this need to find love, but it is confusing me. Do vocations confuse people or are people left with absolutely no doubt in their minds when they are genuinely called?

Thanks.
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I wouldn’t call it confusion… The way I explained it to the priest I’ve been talking to was thus:

It feels as though I’ve come to the stereotypical fork in the road. Though it “feels” more like Dante’s first Canto, if you’ve ever had the fortune of reading his Divine Comedy…

I have doubts, but every day I feel brings me more sure of my position.
 
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