Silence in church

[Reuben_J]

Maybe more people just need to be better instructed on what is appropriate. I always understood that conversation was fine in the narthex, but upon entering the church itself you need to hush and put any distractions from God aside (such as phones, etc). And I think by and large most of our parishioners follow this rule. But there are people who don’t. I recall clearly when my Dad died last month I went to the Church to pray for his soul and I was distraught- there was just myself and another woman in there, and she was sitting in a pew, talking on her phone, while I was trying to pray. She was all the way in the back, I was in the front, and I could still hear her conversation clear as a bell. It was distracting and I resented that I couldn’t pray for my Dad in peace without having my thoughts pulled to her conversation.

You are right and I want to support this post.

Mass is a worship and silence is required. This is what it should be, before and after the mass, but especially before.

When we break this rule, it will cause angst to someone else. Unfortunately, it is quite common that people do not observe silence before mass that it necessitates reminders now and then.

Sometimes it cannot be helped and that there may be distraction like when we have small children and of course we have to put up with them. But for adults to speak loudly would be really out of place.

Even if we need to talk, we must still be conscious that this is a mass, and perhaps to tone down our volume. I always feel very thankful when I saw people whisper when they talked in church.

In GIRM, we do away with ‘commentators’ during the mass who would tell us when to stand up or sit down. Our liturgist told us that Catholics should be very familiar with the order of the mass that it is not necessary to tell them all these; they should know what to do next.

Similarly, we should know about being silent too and not unnecessarily make any noise in the church.

 

[JoeFreedom]

Good and practical points, Clare. You’re right on. People should go to their pastor if they feel that strongly about changing things. The only thing it serves to do it here is to vent, which sometimes can be beneficial but it doesn’t do much to change things back at your home church.

The reason I started the thread is because I was curious and wanted to know what it is like for others out there. Easiest way to do is ask. Secondly I started the thread because I do believe that out of respect for our Lord, that when we enter, He deserves some respect. There are many parallels to this throughout society. One would not act like the actors in Animal House at an upscale ballroom event / charity, nor would one act like a a school boy playing tag on a playground at recess during a funeral. God is present and He demands our time with Him, and in social conversation about what movies were “happening” last week, shows disrespect to the One who gave us everything.

I would like to discuss this with my pastor, but he seems to be socializing as much as the others. Maybe he has just forgotten. The priest who just left was very much in the mindset that we revere our Lord through silence and contemplation while in the church, and that we leave the socializing (which Christ loves) to its own time and place.

 

[alphomega]

The point was that in other CCs I’ve attended in the past, some have maintained a good deal of silence and reverence for the locale.

I think you nailed it. Where there is reverence there is silence. Rest assured you are not alone in this frustration.

 

[Monica4316]

I’d really encourage fellow Catholics not to talk inside the church.

sometimes people REALLY need to pray and that’s the only time they can visit Jesus in the Blessed Sacrament. I’ve been in this situation numerous times and it can be very frustrating.

 

[LoveMercyGrace]

A reasonable question and inquiry. I also wish there were not socializing , in or near the Sanctuary, before Mass.

 

[Rosebud77]

As an aside, I’ve seen many priests simply sit and pray in the last pew before Mass.
People quiet right down.

I saw a young priest do this after mass once and deeply impressive. Not sure what happens there but here the priest vanishes immediately. Was used to the Anglican way of him standing at the door greeting his parishioners.

 

[MissRose73]

I notice a lot more silence when going to an Extraordinary Form with the exception if the rosary is recited before Mass. If the rosary isn’t recited, then I do notice the quiet which I like a great deal. I’ve gone to Ordinary Form Masses in places where it is so loud I think I was in a social or party hall, others there is low volume of speaking, some where there is some silence. I don’t mind saying a quick hello to people I know or whatever, but I do my best to save conversations for after Mass as there are certainly people who come early to pray.

 

[JillyAnn]

Hopefully, this is the best spot for this thread.

My family and I attend mass every Sunday and all holy days of obligation, and have been going to the same church for about 10 years now, although every now and then we attend the CC where our children go to school (it’s more convenient for us to go to church in our home town, than to the one where our children go to school). Our work schedules don’t allow us to get to weekday mass, although I try to attend adoration once a month (when it is offered). This is generally when I can find a peaceful quiet moment to pray…

So, as I try and raise my children, I expect them to be respectful of the church, thus when we arrive early for mass, we kneel and pray in silence. We do not chit-chat or talk. After praying, we sit silently, awaiting respectfully for the mass to begin. However, at least in this church, it would seem that most of the folks like to believe that the time prior to mass is social time, including one of the pastors, and it gets noisy, and sets a bad example for my children which makes it more difficult to enforce silence (although I’d say my kids are a lot better at it than most of the others there).

I know that not all churches are like this, and the one where our children go is markedly better, and long ago it was more common that masses were quiet solemn occasions to be with Christ, and to reflect inwardly, but it seems that some of the CC’s are becoming more like “Protestant hour”, where this is the norm.*

I realize that all I can do is pray about it and realize that everyone else has flaws just like I do, but it bothers me, because I don’t want to listen to everyone socializing when they shouldn’t be, especially while I’m trying to pray.

Just curious to know if other CC’s are becoming the same way and if it bothers you?

Thanks.

*Edited note: I used to be Protestant and while I don’t mean in any way to disparage Protestants, to my recollection, I don’t recall silence being standard.

I was raised in the Catholic Church both in the US and Spain from the day I came out of the womb I think! LOL! .

I was raised that when you go into Church you go silently, with reverence to God and in a prayerful way before receiving Communion. If you need to talk it is in a quiet, non disruptive voice, preferably so that no one else can hear you. I would often pray by a stained glass window or in front of a statue of the Blessed Mother with Jesus until Mass started.

I also attended Catholic School and ALL of us did this, no exception, or Sr. would smack your knuckles with the ruler…no joke!!

I like to attend Mass in this way as it gives me a few quiet moments in my day to be peaceful with God an to really listen. I don’t like the disruptions.

I miss the good old days, and I’m not even old!! LOL!

 

[JoeFreedom]

I was raised in the Catholic Church both in the US and Spain from the day I came out of the womb I think! LOL! .

I was raised that when you go into Church you go silently, with reverence to God and in a prayerful way before receiving Communion. If you need to talk it is in a quiet, non disruptive voice, preferably so that no one else can hear you. I would often pray by a stained glass window or in front of a statue of the Blessed Mother with Jesus until Mass started.

I also attended Catholic School and ALL of us did this, no exception, or Sr. would smack your knuckles with the ruler…no joke!!

I like to attend Mass in this way as it gives me a few quiet moments in my day to be peaceful with God an to really listen. I don’t like the disruptions.

I miss the good old days, and I’m not even old!! LOL!

Thanks JillyAnn, your comment about Sr. smacking knuckles made me chuckle (ha, that rhymed!) I never went to Catholic school (I was Lutheran most of my life), but it’s good to know that there are people out there that believe silence in church is golden.

 

[thecolorsblend]

The Church is an organism unto itself. The individual parishes typically have a culture of their own. Not every place will be the same. Loud chatter annoys me… but then I left the evangelical world partly because I wanted silence and peace instead of more noise. So that’s a disgruntled Protestant for you, I guess.

Maybe I haven’t been to a truly noisy parish but I’ve never experienced the same level of mindless chit-chat as I did among the Southern Baptists. My FSSP parish is usually preceded by a rosary so there’s no silence to be had there… but it’s a rosary so I go with it.

I can often hear library voices while waiting and praying in the narthex at a nearby Novus Ordo parish but that’s about as “bad” as it gets. It’s soft and it’s easy to tune that stuff out.

Is it possible that maybe some of you are being a little too sensitive? I mean, if you expect pin-drop silence, I don’t think that’s very realistic.

 

[DaveBj]

You think the chatterers would get the message if folks started wearing the big Mickey-Mouse ear protectors?

Nah, pro’ly not. They’re pretty much oblivious to everyone except themselves to begin with.

 

[Rosebud77]

You think the chatterers would get the message if folks started wearing the big Mickey-Mouse ear protectors?

Nah, pro’ly not. They’re pretty much oblivious to everyone except themselves to begin with.

The LOOKS we get here are awesome!!

 

[ComplineSanFran]

The Eucharist is not present in their churches, so there really is no reason to regard the sanctuary as sacred space deserving of solemnity.!

I am a bit floored that you would say that any church that is not Catholic cannot be regarded at sacred space.

First of all, many MANY churches throughout the world have the Eucharist in their Liturgies where the Body and Blood are consecrated and distributed to the congregation. And secondly, those that do not, still bless and sanctify the sacred space used to worship Christ.

Have you ever been in the Washington Cathedral? Or Taize? Or Iona? Or Mount Athos? There are sacred spaces all over this world, and only a portion of them are Catholic churches. God is much bigger than anything we can put Him in.

I’m sure I misunderstood you earlier, but just in case I did not, do go to one of the sacred spaces that does not have a lit tabernacle in it, and see what God has to say about this matter. I would be quite interested.

 

[jeannetherese]

Mass at one of my parishes is preceded by the Angelus.
Rather than conversing, people are joined communally in prayer.
My Latin Mass parish has a rosary preceding Mass.

 

[tee_eff_em]

[ASIDE: ]

Not sure what you are trying to figure out here? Prior to mass (5-10 minutes prior to start), one of the pastors/priests/fathers (whatever you would like to call them) walks around greeting and chatting with the others, encouraging the talking, rather than promoting the reverence for silence of what we are about to undertake as a congregation.

We have an Associate Pastor at our church. I guess since all of the CCs I’ve ever attended regularly have had two pastors.

Neither the OP nor several others who have used the word give a location. I am told it is common in British English to to refer to what USAns call a *Parish Priest *as Pastor (Latin parochus). Perhaps this usage is also making its way across the pond?

:tiphat:

tee

 

[ProVobis]

Mass at one of my parishes is preceded by the Angelus.
Rather than conversing, people are joined communally in prayer.
My Latin Mass parish has a rosary preceding Mass.

It’s a good practice, although I’ve found it difficult to do my penance during a public rosary after going to confession.