Sin and Confession

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juan753

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Hi,

I have some questions here. First of all, I posted a thread once where I said I used to enjoy seeing images of naked men and also had gay sexual thoughts, but now I repent doing that, especially since I don’t consider myself gay (I like women, and I can’t see myself with a guy, and even if I did, I wouldn’t do it because that would be against God’s law).

When I realized all that I used to do was bad, I went to confess, but I just said that I used to “consent impure thoughts by looking at images and stuff like that”, but I never said they were gay thoughts. Should I have said it?

I used to like to see men without shirts and stuff like that, but I didn’t think of having sex with them, I just liked to see them, the same way I liked to see myself in the mirror. All of this is probably just the result of the obsession of being muscular that I grew up with.

The worst part is, I once even searched for images of Jesus on the cross!! (This is probably the worst thing I could do). I didn’t have impure thoughts with Jesus or anything like that (the previous paragraph explains), but I feel that I insulted His image and His Name by doing this. I already told Jesus that I really, really, really repent doing this, and it’s true. But, should I confess that I did this? If I do, how can I explain it?

All of this was a long time ago and I just want to forget all that and continue receiving the grace of God in my life. I love God with my entire life and I just want to bury all these horrible things I used to do to Him.
 
Something that helps me during Reconciliation, I imagine I’m speaking with Jesus through the priest (which is what we are doing in Reconciliation). I prepare myself for the final day when Jesus meets my soul.

I think some here would say that your sin is absolved.

It seems to me that your conscience is asking you to confront your actions to a greater degree, to be more honest with Jesus, and to accept that with His grace you will find freedom to overcome this temporary fixation.
 
Thank you.

Yeah, I’ve already told Jesus I’m really sorry, and I am, but I don’t know if I should say it in confession.
 
juan753 said:
Thank you.

Yeah, I’ve already told Jesus I’m really sorry, and I am, but I don’t know if I should say it in confession.
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Yes, say it in confession exactly as you did in your earlier post in this thread.
 
Thank you.

Hmm… well, I guess I should just do it. It will be hard to say, but I should have thought of it when I sinned.

Thank God I will be leaving town this weekend, so I can confess with a different priest. 😃
It’s still gonna be embarrassing, though. I just can’t think of something more messed up than this.

Thank you again.
 
juan753 said:
Thank you.

Hmm… well, I guess I should just do it. It will be hard to say, but I should have thought of it when I sinned.

Thank God I will be leaving town this weekend, so I can confess with a different priest. 😃
It’s still gonna be embarrassing, though. I just can’t think of something more messed up than this.

Thank you again.
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Good decision! And the fact that you are dreading it so much now means that you will be that much happier later when you’ve received absolution. It’s worth it!
 
Yeah, I thought of that too, thank you.

Another thing that bothers me is that all this time (since many months ago) there has been this barrier between God and me and I just didn’t see it. 😦

I just hope I can do it ASAP, since I just want to receive God’s grace to keep going and destroy this barrier between Him and me.
 
Well, it’s over, but I still got one more doubt.

I told the priest everything I said in the first post, about the gay thoughts, and the obsession and the Jesus thing, etc.

At one point I said that I used to “consent impure thoughts with women and with men”. The thing is, is watching gay porn (well, not exactly porn, but a sex scene in a gay movie) included in that sentence? Because I didn’t exactly remember that when I confessed, but now that I look back at the confession, I remember I said “consent impure thoughts with women and with men”, and I want to know if the watching-gay-sex thing can be included in the “with men”.

I repeat: these are things that I did a loooooooong time ago.
 
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